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I always look forward to books by Kate Messner. Why? Because I know they will be solid, kid centered and bring something to the table. I had read online that she had recently been disinvited to a school due to the content of her latest book.  I quickly went to my TBR pile and pulled out my copy to give it a go.

Charlie's sister Abby is home from college for the weekend and things aren't going exactly like Charlie had imagined they would.  When she goes to wake Abby up to see if she will come out to look at the lake with her just in case the ice flowers have shown up again, Abby waves her off telling her to just go away. Somewhat chagrinned, Charlie trudges out to the lake only to see that the ice flowers have come back. Her neighbor Drew and his nana are also out on the lake but they are checking the ice for fishing possibilities. Drew tells Charlie about the fishing derby he plans on entering and the prize of $1000 for the biggest lake perch. Since Charlie really wants a new dress for her Irish dancing competitions, she decides to give it a go.

But despite living near the lake, Charlie is scared of its winter ice. So when she joins Drew and his nana, she sticks closer to shore. Soon everyone is landing fish left and right except for Charlie. When she finally pulls one in, it's hardly bigger than the bait she used to catch it. But right before she releases it she hears something. The fish is talking to her. "Release me and I will grant you a wish."

Well, what would you do? Charlie hastily wishes on her crush liking her and to not be afraid of the ice anymore. What harm could wishing on a fish really do?

Anyone who has read a fairy tale knows that wishes can easily go awry. And Charlie's wishes are no exception. While no harm is truly done, Charlie finds herself out on the ice more and more  (since she miraculously is no longer afraid of the ice) with Drew and his nana. Not only is it adding to her feis dress fund, but it's getting her out of the house. It turns out that Abby has changed in ways that Charlie never even imagined. While she was away at school, she started dabbling in drugs which led to a full blown heroin addiction. Who can Charlie even talk to about this? When she thinks about it, she feels ashamed and bewildered. How could Abby, who she had always looked up to, done this?

Kate Messner has written an important book that somewhat gently looks at the fact that anyone can be swiftly taken down by drugs, and specifically by opiates. I live on Staten Island where opiate abuse and heroin are at an all time high.  I commute to Manhattan with my children, and by the time they were 9 and 12 respectively they could tell the difference between someone napping and someone in a nod. They have witnessed police using narcan on people who have OD'd in the ferry terminal. They watched me try to convince the friends of a woman in the throws of an OD to allow me to call an ambulance for her. Kids aren't too young for this story. My kids are living this story everyday they commute. And the brothers and sisters of kids all over our Island are living Charlie's story.  So I would like to applaud Kate Messner for telling this story. It is one I plan on sharing and book talking whenever I get the chance.

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Consider the following scenario: Two women both lost a son in a war. One returns to work immediately and starts volunteering at an organization helping families of fallen soldiers. The other is unable to leave home, spends most of her days crying and sitting in front of her son’s belongings that were left untouched. Who is more resilient? The answer largely depends on how one defines resilience.

The post Defining resilience appeared first on OUPblog.

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Aligator at Avery Island

More Gators

My Bird's Eye View

in the E.R., patched up, ready for a cast

Let the Healing Begin

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1. A stimulus triggers the senses. The brain receives the stimulus instantaneously. It can be something your character hears, intuits, sees, smells, tastes, or touches.

2. The body has an involuntary response that takes a nanosecond. The limbic system evaluates the stimulus and sends chemicals racing through the body as neurons fire, depending on its evaluation of whether the stimulus is negative, positive, or neutral. The brain decides if there is a potential threat or reward.

3. The response triggers a reflexive action.

4. The brain then regains control over the body and makes a conscious decision about how to proceed.

A posited theory is that everyone we meet (and everything we come across) leaves a neural imprint. The brain decides if a person, place, or thing is a friend or foe and whether the next encounter will be negative or positive. The composite images are stored in an easily accessed file folder for comparison. How much a person or thing resembles the positive or negative composites determines how likely you are to like or dislike a new person, place, or thing when you encounter it. It decides whether snakes are lovely or lethal, whether a physical action is comforting or threatening, and whether an action you take is likely to result in reward or punishment.

It compares faces and decides that your new boss looks a lot like the girl you liked in elementary school. Your initial reaction is positive. She may turn out to be perfectly awful.

The brain makes these split-second decisions every second of every day. It is important to understand this process as you write, but it's only necessary to zero in on this part of the response at the most critical turning points of your story.

Next, the body reacts involuntarily to the stimulus. It recoils or reaches out. It startles or is soothed. A character gasps, coughs, sneezes, laughs, or screams. This reaction is embedded deep within the animal part of the brain. It is governed by sheer instinct and raw emotion. It is the fight or flight response at play. His pulse, breathing, and muscles react. His skin erupts in chills. His mouth goes dry. The character is not speaking or moving yet. He flinches, blinks, tenses, and displays a micro-expression.

What happens next depends on how the brain filters the stimulus through the character's conditioning, personality, and emotional connection to the stimulus. It tests the emotion of the moment. The brain decides to override or reinforce the initial involuntary response. If the stimulus is a threat from a comforting person, it causes dissonance. The same is true if the loving gesture is issued from a threatening stimulus. Dick's impulse may be to hug someone. It is awkward when that someone pulls away from it.

Finally, the character's conscious mind takes over and is free to decide which course of action to take next. The body recovers from the initial reflex. It overcomes the muscle memory and moves with intention. Conscious control over his breathing, pulse, and muscles is restored. Dick moves deliberately forward or backward and speaks. He alters his breathing, flexes his trembling knees, or relaxes his tightened gut and jaw. He smiles and shakes hands or fake smiles and avoids shaking hands.

If Dick has been startled, shocked, or wounded, his body recovers. Writers often forget to mention this step of the process. His system returns to normal once the threat has passed. Make sure you show the recovery after a major impact.

Not every encounter needs to reveal every beat. Use more beats when the tension is high, less when the tension is low. Use extreme actions and reactions sparingly. The verbal camera should zoom in on the mechanics during critical parts and zoom out for the noncritical parts.

Next time we will discuss distance and touching. How close is too close?

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Yield a crop of pumpkins!

This is from a picture book that I illustrated called THE GOODBYE CANCER GARDEN, written by Janna Matthies. It recently won the 2011 Best English Language Children's Book at the Sharjah International Book Fair - wow! And it's also been chosen for CCBC Choices 2012: The Cooperative Children's Book Center top children's book picks for 2012. It's being translated into Arabic and Danish. I hope I get copies of those!

Cancer affects so many families these days. This is such an important, hopeful book about one family's way of responding to Mom's breast cancer recovery. What an honor to illustrate.

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During the 1988 Jamboree encampment of 32,000 Boy Scouts, one troop (38 Scouts) led the entire Jamboree in cuts treated at the medical tent.

The huge number of nicks from busy knives sounded negative until someone toured the camp and saw the unique artistic walking sticks each boy in that troop had made. They led the entire encampment in other kinds of games, too.

Wounds simply mean that you’re in the game. It’s true for Boy Scouts–and it’s true for writers as well.

What Wounds?

I know an excellent writer who has revised a book for years–but won’t submit it, even though everyone who has read it feels the book is ready. What benefit does she get from that? She never has to face rejection. She never has to hear an editor say, “This is good–but it needs work.” She never has to read a bad review of her book, or do any speaking engagements to promote her work, or learn how to put together a website.

She will also never feel the exhilaration of holding her published book in her hands. She won’t get letters from children who tell her how much her book means to them and has helped them. She won’t get a starred review or win an award or do a book signing. She won’t move on and write a second (and third and fourth) book.

Paying the Price

If you want to be a writer, you have to get into the game and risk a few wounds. Figure out ways to bandage them and recover from them, but don’t be afraid of getting them. They’re simply a sign that you’re a writer. Wear the battle scars proudly!

What part(s) of the writing life make you want to stay on the sidelines and out of the line of fire?

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Category: Young Adult Realistic Fiction
Format: Hardcover (also available in eBook and Kindle formats)
Keywords: Children of alcoholics, sisters, recovery, romance


Kimberly's review:

Realistic YA fiction just got another stellar book on its list with Rosie and Skate. Rosie and Skate's alcoholic dad is in prison again and things are tough. Rosie's holding out hope for Dad to get better. Skate is trying to deal with her boyfriend going to Rutgers and starting a long distance relationship. Skate lives with her boyfriend's mom and Rosie is in their worn home, being looked after by her cousin. As life moves on, the girls' grow up.

I wasn't sure what to expect from this book. If I had seen it at a bookstore, I may not have picked it up. (So special thanks to Alethea, book guru, who recommended it to me!) But I'm here to tell you that the front flap blurb doesn't do the book justice.

Short, sweet and well written, each girl's journey is sometimes difficult to experience, but I did--and that's good writing. There were moments when I was cringing, or I felt like my heart was breaking, or I would keep shifting on my couch to find a better position only to realize it wasn't my beat up couch making me squirm. It was the dialogue, the feeling, the love in this book.

This novel may be not suitable for younger readers, as there are references to sex and drugs; but all of these taboo topics are dealt with in a delicate and tasteful way. The characters are full and complicated. Bauman doesn't shy away from uneasy themes. Hope, love, disappointment--it's all there in a bittersweet story that made me wish there was more.

---

You can find Alethea's review here.

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One of my health goals is to stop taking so much aspirin and other painkillers. It causes more problems than it helps. This has been an ongoing goal for years, and recently I found something amazingly simple that is really helping!

The Painful Side of Writing

When I started writing, I don’t recall ever reading anything about health problems associated with writing. But sitting for hours, especially at a computer, takes a toll on your neck, back, wrists, and hands. The associated headaches and back pain keep many writers on painkillers of one sort or another.

Then my daughter suggested that I get some yoga DVDs. My initial reaction was negative. My mental image of yoga was of some spaced-out chanting person twisted into an inhuman pretzel. Not for me!

Yoga for Writers (and other stiff people)

I quickly learned that my ideas were outdated. From my library, I checked out “Healing Yoga for Aches & Pains,” which was as soothing as a massage (and got rid of my headache!) I have yet to try “Yoga for Inflexible People.” My favorite DVD so far is Yoga: Sitting Fit Anytime, which has nine separate 3-5 minute segments addressing individual needs of people who sit at computers for hours.

It’s easy to follow, you do it sitting, and it targets neck and shoulder tension, lower back pain, upper back pain, tight hamstrings, headaches, and carpal tunnel problems. There was even a segment for stiff hands and fingers. There was no chanting. (FYI: I skip the New Agey intro–not for me! Just want the stretches.)

Preventive and Restorative

If you don’t have aches and pains from writing, thank heaven. But also consider doing some routine stretching to prevent developing such problems. If you already suffer from head, back and/or arm pain, consider yoga as a drug-free solution. Your body–AND creative mind–will thank you.

[P.S. If you long-time faithful readers thought this sounded like a repeat, you're right. Had a ripping headache today that I finally got rid of with the DVD stretches! Thought you all might need the same reminder I did.]

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After a couple months this spring of unexpected work and lack of sleep, I’ve found myself battling severe procrastination the past few weeks. I’m getting rested up, but I’m so out of the writing habit that getting started has become a big issue.

Luckily I can usually find a resource on my own shelves!

(FYI: After you finish this post, you may want to read my article on writer’s block called “A Block by Any Other Name…”  at the Absolute Write website .)

A Different Take on Procrastination

One such resource is a book Kurt Vonnegut called “as well researched and helpful a book on writing as I’ve ever read.” It’s Write: 10 Days to Overcome Writer’s Block. Period. by Karen E. Peterson, Ph.D. [See Amazon's great used prices for this book!]

From the author’s website: “Writers want to write, but often find themselves whirling through cyberspace, glued to HBO with a box of doughnuts, careening off to the nearest Starbuck’s, and/or carving out last week’s fossilized spaghetti from the kitchen table.”

Sound familiar? This is what Dr. Karen E. Peterson— who has overcome writer’s block herself—calls ‘the write-or-flight response.’

Write? Or Flight?

In this revolutionary book, a psychologist and novelist presents an effective way to outwit writer’s block. Based on “new brain research and sound psychological principles,” this innovative program shows writers how to conquer writer’s block using:

• Exercises to conquer the “write-or-flight” response
• Techniques to create that elusive “writing mood”
• Parallel monologue and interior dialogue to jumpstart the writing process
• Checklists to see which side of the brain is blocking you

I fully recommend that little book because it worked for me. (I realize that it doesn’t mean it will work for you, but I think it’s worth a try if procrastination is an issue for you.) It explained the actual physical reasons why certain types of blocks occur–and what to do about them.

(Now, off to read “A Block by Any Other Name…” )

Before you go though, do YOU have a favorite block buster you could share?

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Being sick for ten days recently taught me some lessons.

1) I’m too busy. It’s no wonder I have trouble getting any writing done, much less enjoying it. I’ve noticed for months that I was having a lot of trouble settling down and actually doing my daily writing. I was great at telling other people how to do it, but not good at it myself. So when I was extremely ill–but still getting more writing done than usual–it got my attention. Why was that?

It was because I was running a fever and couldn’t see people or I would spread the plague. Each morning I’d stand in the bathroom, shivering, and take my temperature. If it was over 101, the solution was simple: cancel all meetings I had that day. Most days I cancelled more than one meeting or appointment. In ten days, I cancelled ten things. Two things I really minded (babysitting my grandkids). Eight things I didn’t mind much at all. (And truthfully, five of the things I was thrilled to get out of.)

After being home a week, I realized how lovely it was to be home. I didn’t enjoy being sick, but I loved being able to stay put. And just from being home more, I wrote more. Usually just fifteen or twenty minutes at a time out of sheer boredom, but it all added up. And a lot faster than my “well” days when I pushed myself to write.

The result? I resigned from an office that requires about six or seven hours per month and two meetings per month. I plan to back out of a few more things when my terms are up.

2) The second lesson I learned when sick was that I’m online too much. I had sort of realized this for a long time, and had a goal of not getting online until noon because email and Facebook and surfing ate up too much time. But when sick, I just wanted to be curled up on the couch with the heating pad, blankets, cough drops, and a book. (I don’t have a wireless laptop, thank goodness, so that wasn’t an option.)

After ten days of only being online maybe an hour every other day to attend to editor email and post a blog, I realized how much more I was enjoying my days–even sick! I’m not even sure why, but I find being online too much quite agitating. I don’t read or watch things that are disturbing, so it’s rather a mystery to me, but I definitely notice it.

I’m feeling much better now, but yesterday I deliberately stayed offline because I didn’t need to blog, and I wrote and read and took my book outside and sat in the swing (which I hadn’t done in months) and noticed things (cardinals, daffodils coming up, lawn furniture needing scrubbing). I got the reading done that I needed to do for a class, but it was calming.

3) The third lesson I learned while sick is that I don’t read enough good books. I read a lot of articles online, or books that don’t challenge me but are entertaining before I drop off to sleep. But good books? Challenging books? They’re hard to find.

When my fever dropped after a week or so, I headed to the library for some new books. I had been re-reading classics on my shelf which I loved, but I was ready to concentrate on something new. I brought home six brand new books–I was the first to check them out.

I only ended up reading one of them all the way through, and it was only so-so. The others-many by bestselling authors–I only made it through about fifteen pages. Apparently the trend now in adult books is to switch viewpoints every two or three pages (one book had seven viewpoints in fifteen pages), and it was like being jerked around on a badly edited

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Category: YA Fantasy

Format: Paperback

Keywords: Eating disorders, anorexia, bulimia, recovery

How I found out about this book: Netgalley.com


Quickie: I read this just before Thanksgiving Day this year. I thought it apropos.

My review: At first I thought, not another depressing book about eating disorders. I have to say, the anorexic-as-Famine twist to the story makes the whole thing much more readable. I didn't want to be so thoroughly sucked in and sucked dry as I was while reading Wintergirls (also a great, but much more emotionally demanding novel about eating disorders/depression/family issues by Laurie Halse Anderson). In Hunger I could appreciate reading about the symptoms, obsessive thoughts and emotional explanations behind the diseases portrayed, while being able to maintain a safe observer's distance. In this sense I was able to enjoy a book of a type that is not usually enjoyable in any way. Heck, I even laughed a couple of times.

I loved the simple but striking characterization of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse (including their steeds, in particular the mount that Lisabeth names Midnight)--Death as a sort of emo ex-rock-star, the wry and witty Pestilence, the big and blustery War. I liked Morse's admission, through her characterization of Lisabeth's parents and friends, that no one is perfect, and that people are not always as they seem. Lisabeth'

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In 1953 a fledgling business called Rocket Chemical Company set out to create a rust-prevention solvent for use in the aerospace industry. It took them 40 attempts to get the formula right.

Voila! WD-40, which stands for Water Displacement, 40th attempt.

I find that inspiring! What if they’d given up on number 39? Then I wouldn’t have my favorite solution for unsticking locks and making my sliding glass doors actually slide.

WD-40 Your Manuscripts

No, don’t spray the greasy mist on your manuscript. But do take the WD-40 as your slogan. Don’t stop submitting until you also have tried many, many times!

In order to spur myself on to submit several book manuscripts that I had “retired” after just two rejections, yesterday I was reading in Ralph Keyes’ The Writer’s Book of Hope. I was encouraged by some very famous “WD-40″ kinds of authors who would have remained nameless if they’d given up so early.

• Despite being represented by a top literary agent and being read by prominent editors, John Knowles’s A Separate Peace was rejected by every major American publisher who saw it. (It was published in London.)
• Other famous books that went through multiple rejects include: Look Homeward, Angel; Love Story; A Wrinkle in Time; All Things Bright and Beautiful and many other novels that became classics and continue to sell decades later.
• Twenty major publishers thought Chicken Soup for the Soul had no commercial prospects, despite the authors being experienced speakers and aggressive marketers.
• Stephen King’s first four novels and sixty short stories were rejected.

Having your work turned down is no fun, and I won’t sing the praises of being rejected. I hate it too. But we must come to terms with it, accept it as part of the writing life, accept criticism if it has merit, and get on with it.

A Necessary Part

As Keyes puts it, “To working writers, rejection is like stings to a beekeeper: a painful but necessary part of their vocation.”

And now…in the spirit of the inventers of WD-40, I’m off to submit my manuscripts another 38 times.

[I'm curious about you. 'Fess up. How many rejections do you get on a manuscript before you give up on it?]

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I recently re-read Angela Booth’s “Change Your Life with Your Journal.” I’ve  journaled through many down periods in my life, and it’s always been therapeutic. However, her following statement hooked me.

“The key point to note is not the therapeutic effects of writing in a journal but rather the fact that regular journal keeping will influence the way you think or feel about a specific topic.”

And what big change did Angela accomplish in her writing career by using journaling? It’s a change I would give almost anything to also achieve! This is the leap of growth that journaling allowed her to make.

“I could see that unless I changed my reluctance to market my writing, I would be stuck at a level of income I knew I could surpass… Journaling helped me change my mind about marketing my writing. I went from someone who became physically ill at the thought of sending out query letters and making cold calls to market my copywriting, to someone who LOVES marketing.” What a change!

The Proof in the Pudding

I tried her idea. In my journal I wrote about a writing task I had put off for weeks–and it had grown in my mind to mammoth proportions. I wrote about why I didn’t want to do it, what I feared would happen if I failed, all that angst stuff.

Then later I sat down to do that task, wondering if the journaling self-talk had helped. I got the job done–it took only 25 minutes according to my kitchen timer–and minus the angst. I was amazed. Only 25 minutes after procrastinating on the chore for weeks. Sheesh!

Make It a Habit

Give this idea a try with something in your writing life that has you stumped or scared or blocked. Share your experience with journaling toward an attitude change.

Did this idea work for you?

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You’ve often heard the phrase “you are your own worst enemy.” Does this apply to you when trying to create a writing life you love? It certainly applies to me!

How does this enemy within keep you from moving ahead with your writing dreams? By telling you lies. Some are bold-faced lies. Some are wrapped in soft wool. Some lies ridicule you, while others sound downright comforting. What do all these voices in your head have in common?

They’re instruments of self-sabotage. They convince you to give up.

Who’s Talking Now?

There are many voices inside your head. You must listen and decide who’s doing the talking at any particular moment. Some voices are easy to recognize; some are so subtle you’ll be shocked. First, you have the…

Voice of the Inner Critic

It whispers words like “What makes you think you have anything interesting to say?” “You’re no good.” “That junk will never sell.” “You’re actually going to show that story to somebody?” The Inner Critic beats you down with criticism. Sometimes this voice bears a remarkable similarity to that of your mother, your spouse, or your junior high English teacher.

As Julia Cameron says in The Artist’s Way at Work, creativity requires a sense of inner safety, something like a fortress. “In order to have one, you must disarm the snipers, traitors and enemies that may have infiltrated your psyche.”

I spent years fighting my Inner Critic’s voice with positive affirmations and gritted teeth. “Oh, yes, I can!” was my motto. In time, my Inner Critic was quieted, only speaking out when I got an unexpected rejection or bad review. Yet I still wasn’t creating the writing life I dreamed of. Something was holding me back. It took me a long time to realize I still had voices in my head, because the tone and words had changed.

Do any of the following voices live inside your head and keep you from fully pursuing your writing dreams? Listen and see.

Voice of Responsibility

This voice sounds so adult, so sensible. It tells you to grow up, to get your head out of the clouds and your feet back on the ground. “You’re neglecting your children (or your job),” says this voice. “Look at your messy kitchen (or yard or garage).” “You have no business hiring someone else to mow the lawn so you can write!” “You’d better walk the poor dog first.”

Guilt is piled on by this voice, and you crumble under its weight. You put your writing dream on the back burner until a time when you’re less burdened by responsibility.

Voice of Intimidation

This voice is snide and cryptic. It slaps your hand when you try to crawl out of the box that is your life and declare yourself a writer. “Who do you think you are?” this voice asks. “You’ll make a fool of yourself!”

Doubt and low self-worth take these statements as the truth, and that of course only serves to further lower your self-esteem. Cowering, you crawl back in the box and close the lid on your dreams.

(The rest of the article on self-sabotage (which also includes the voices of fear, compassion, and procrastination) is

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What have you given up in order to have time to write?

When I started out, giving up my hour of pleasure reading in the afternoon (the kids’ naptime) was the biggest sacrifice I made. I loved that hour of escape where I rose above my daily chores and relished adult language and words longer than one syllable. Yes, I could still read at night when the kids were in bed, but by then I was too sleepy to keep my eyes open.

Are You Sacrificing TOO Much?

We’ve talked lately about tracking your time and then sacrificing some of your current pleasures in order to write. And yes, time for pleasure reading may have to be cut back drastically in the “learning years.” Like many writers, my pleasure reading is now used as a reward. (I often set my timer and write for thirty minutes, promising myself a ten-minute reading break for each thirty minutes of writing. I love those reading breaks!) I try to read at bedtime too, but I still fall asleep too quickly.

I once had a student who read five romance novels per week, every week. Really! I had no problem recommending that she turn 75% of that time into writing time. Most of you don’t have that kind of time to read for pleasure–and I don’t either. You may only have thirty minutes to an hour for pleasure reading. And when you give it up, you’re losing a writer’s #1 most favorite pastime: reading.

Short-Term Sacrifice

If you’ve given up pleasure reading in order to write, I hope you will be able to add it back to your life soon. I think writers need to read. (And not just books on craft or books in the genre you hope to publish in.) Reading for pleasure nurtures our soul–and keeps us in touch with what readers want.

So how can you balance this while you’re learning to write, especially when you’re juggling a day job and/or a family? Make use of alternative methods. Discover books on tape, and listen during car pools or while washing dishes. Discover books on MP3 players like Playaways, or download digital books from your library, and listen to them while you run or garden.

When my time was the shortest–when the kids were small and I was working another job in addition to the writing and school visits–all I could carve out for pleasure reading was fifteen minutes per day. It wasn’t enough time to finish a book in a month–and I couldn’t figure out the plot in those little bits.

During those years, then, I re-read the classics on my shelves. Consequently I’ve memorized whole chunks of Pride & Prejudice, Little Women, and other favorites. Since I already knew the plot and characters, I could relax and just enjoy seeing old friends for fifteen minutes each day.

No Time to Read

I know a good number of full-time professional writers who have given up pleasure reading altogether. They said they just don’t have time. What do you think about that? Is pleasure reading something you’d give up in order to have the writing career of your dreams?

Why–or why not?

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“Writing is not everything,” says Lisa Shearin in the April, 2010 Writer Magazine. “And if you want longevity in this business, play isn’t just important–it’s critical. We get so intensely focused on having achieved the dream and working so hard to keep the dream going, that we’re blind to the signs that if we keep going down that road at a fast pace, that dream could quickly turn into a nightmare.”

Recipe for Burnout

I was very glad to read her opinion piece–and I wish that message was published more often. I wish someone had said it to me years ago. Having a healthy drive is good, but letting yourself be driven–by others or your own inner critic–will eventually ruin the joy you originally brought to your writing.

“Dreams are meant to be savored and enjoyed,” Shearin says. “You do have to work hard, but sometimes, the work can wait.”

Too Late

Great advice, but what if you’re already burned out? What if–from overwork, juggling too many jobs and family members, a major loss, or chronic illness–your ideas have dried up? I’ve been there twice in my writing life, and it was a scary place to be.

Peggy Simson Curry spoke about this in a Writer Magazine archive article first published in 1967. She detailed the process she followed to “slowly work [her] way back to writing” and discover what had killed her creative urge in the first place.

Face the Fear

I think most writers would agree with Peggy that fear is at the basis of being unable to write–fear that a writer can’t write anything worth publishing. Burned out writers constantly think of writing something that will sell.

“This insidious thinking,” Curry says, “persuades the writer to question every story idea that comes to him. He no longer becomes excited with glimpses of theme, characters, setting, threads of lot. He can only ask desperately, ‘But who will want it?’”

Healing Choices

Among other suggestions, this writer said it was very important to deliberately get outside, away from the writing, and just enjoy the world around you. In other words, play.

Coming out of burnout can be done, but it often takes methodical, small daily disciplines to do it. For me, digging in the flower gardens and stitching small quilted wall hangings finally unclogged my creativity. Things that help will be different for each writer.

Have you ever felt burned out with your writing? If so, what helped you to come out of it and write again? If you have a minute, please share an idea with other readers.

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Rejection is part of the writing life. Writers have always struggled not to take rejection personally. Unless you’re super human, it deals a blow to one’s self-esteem.

“To be a writer is to be rejected. I’m not kidding,” says Rachel Ballon, Ph.D., author of The Writer’s Portable Therapist. “Those writers who stop writing the first time they’re rejected can’t call themselves writers because rejection is part and parcel of the writing game. It isn’t what happens to you IF you’re rejected, it’s what you do or don’t do WHEN you’re rejected.”

You Can Recover

I get concerned when my writer friends and students get so beaten down by a rejection. (And with our struggling economy lately, rejections are happening more frequently.) Rejections do hurt, and the disappointment can be huge. All the “don’t take it personally” lectures don’t help much then. You need more, especially in the initial stages when the rejection is new and raw.

“Expect rejection and disappointments with the knowledge that you’ll recover from them,” says Ballon. “Be just as prepared for rejection as you’re prepared for an earthquake in California or a hurricane in Florida.”

Plan Ahead

I never thought of that before: prepare for rejection. It makes sense though!

Most of my family members live in Florida now, and when a tropical storm is building to hurricane status, they go into motion like a well oiled machine. Buy batteries and food staples. Nail plywood over windows. Make sure generator works. Stock up on drinkable water. They don’t just sit back and hope the hurricane veers off and misses them. They know that the likelihood of being hit by a hurricane is low, but definitely possible. Being prepared has saved their lives and property more than once. And their plans for recovery and clean-up go into effect as soon as the storm passes.

The likelihood of writers being rejected is about 100%–much worse odds than destruction from an earthquake or hurricane. But how many of us have a plan for recovering from that particular professional “disaster”? Not many, I’m guessing. But we should have. We know it’s coming from time to time. And I wonder if we wouldn’t respond better if we planned for it.

Strategy

How do you plan for the day-perhaps after months of hopeful waiting or interested nibbles-when your story or novel or proposal is rejected? How can you prepare for it? Well, what makes you feel better when you’ve been rejected by someone in your personal life?

• A hot bath and a good novel?
• A phone call to your best friend?
• A candy bar or Starbucks coffee?
• Hanging out with people who do love you?
• Going for a hard sweaty run or bike ride?
• Journaling?
• Curling up with a “feel good” movie or chick flick?

Chances are, those same things will help you through a manuscript rejection. They can be the solace for your bruised soul.

Plan Ahead-Work Your Plan

I think I’m going to make a list on a card called “Rejection Recovery Strategies” and tack it to my bulletin board. And the next time a book or prop

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I spent much of last week sick in bed, but it gave me a chance to read more than usual. I got a couple of “aha!” moments from the book I was reading (Who Switched Off My Brain?) mentioned last week.

The book deals with what the author calls “the Dirty Dozen” areas in our lives where we create our own problems, often by well-meaning efforts. This toxic behavior can derail our purpose in life and steal our dreams–including our writing dreams.

Two of the dirty dozen that hit me between the eyes was “toxic seriousness” and “toxic schedules.” And I knew that I’d stumbled across two of the reasons I was sick instead of fighting off common viruses.

AHA! #1

I’ve known for years that negative emotions like anger and unforgiveness can literally make you physically sick. But did you know that an absence of fun in your life can make you sick too?

Laughter IS the Best medicine!

For a lot of reasons, I grew up with the firmly entrenched idea that “life is a serious matter.” People who didn’t take life seriously annoyed me. I thought they simply didn’t understand the situation!

Well sometimes life is no laughing matter, but you still need to incorporate more fun in your life. [I finally understood why I felt so much better physically after spending time with my grandkids, despite being tired. I laugh a lot more on those days!]

Did you know this? Studies show that “a really good belly laugh can make cortisol drop by 39% and adrenalin by 70%, while the ‘feel-good hormone,’ endorphin, increases by 29%…Laughter boosts your immune system by increasing immunity levels and disease-figthing cells.”

Another medical study showed that humor gets both sides of your brain working together, which is so necessary to writers. We need to be both creative and editor-minded (left-brained and right-brained) in order to do our best writing.

So take time to bring fun into your life today–and every day. Look for the humor in situations–or even yourself. Watch a funny video. Read something that tickles your funny bone. Tell a joke!

AHA! #2

In my case, I realized over the weekend that my “toxic seriousness” went hand-in-hand with what the author called “toxic schedules.” One had a direct impact on the other. My overly serious attitude about life leads to an over-scheduled week that doesn’t work unless I invent a 48-hour day. And, of course, a packed schedule adds pressure and just reinforces an overly serious attitude.

Current brain research shows that there’s a lot more at risk than just being tired when you over-schedule yourself. Of particular interest to writers, without sufficient relaxation in your lifestyle, “you will become a less effective thinker, defeating your ability to accomplish the mental tasks that stole our relaxation in the first place. In fact, for the brain to function like it should, it needs regroup/consolidation time. If it doesn’t get this, it will send out signals in the form of high-level stress hormones, some of which are epinephrine, norepinephine and cortisol. If these che

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According to the National Science Foundation, the average person has about 12,000 thoughts per day, or 4.4 million thoughts per year.

I wager that writers are well above the average because we read more and writing causes us to think more than the average.

Who’s In Charge?

I had known for a long time that our thoughts affect our emotions, and that toxic “stinking thinking” could derail our writing dreams and health faster than almost anything. You are the only one who can decide whether to reject or accept a thought, which thoughts to dwell on, and which thoughts will become actions.

But sometimes–a lot of the time–I felt powerless to actually do anything about it on a consistent basis. Sometimes I simply felt unfocused and overwhelmed.

Need a Brain Detox?

I’ve been reading a “scientific brain studies” book for non-science types like me called Who Switched Off My Brain? by Dr. Caroline Leaf Ph.D. which has fascinated me. With scientific studies to back it up, it shows that thoughts are measurable and actually occupy mental “real estate.” Thoughts are active; they grow and change, influencing every decision we make and physical reaction we have.

“Every time you have a thought, it is actively changing your brain and your body–for better or for worse.” The author talks about the “Dirty Dozen”–which can be as harmful as poison in our minds and our bodies.

Killing Our Creativity

Among this dozen deadly areas of toxic thinking are toxic emotions, toxic words, toxic seriousness, toxic health, and toxic schedules.

If you want to delve into the 350+ scientific references and pages of end notes in the back of the book, you can look up the studies. But basically it targets the twelve toxic areas of our lives that produce 80% of the physical, emotional and mental health issues today. And trust me. Those issues have a great deal to do with you achieving your goals and dreams.

There Is Hope!

According to Dr. Leaf, scientists no longer believe that the brain is hardwired from birth with a fixed destiny to wear out with age, a fate predetermined by our genes. Instead there is scientific proof now for what the Bible has always taught: you can renew your minds and heal. Your brain really can change!

Old brain patterns can be altered, and new patterns can be implemented. In the coming days, I’ll share some more about the author’s ”Brain Sweep” five-step strategy for detoxing your thoughts associated with the “dirty dozen.”

But right now I’m going to read about the symptoms of a toxic schedule. I have a suspicion…

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Life -  Life carried on when we returned to Poky. I wouldn't say it got back to normal, but things weren't too bad. The main thing was my arm. I started getting extremely claustrophobic at times, I'd get shaky and nervous, sick to my stomach. I also noticed the cold a lot more, getting hot and cold flashes seemingly at random, with the cold always starting in my right arm. I suppose that it

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Because I am going to practice what I preach and go for a long hike today, I decided to post a previous article on recovering your energy. It’s worth repeating, I think.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

In a previous blog on “Managing Your Energy Fully,” I quoted from the book The Power of Full Engagement:

To be an effective energy manager, you need to spend nearly all of your time fully engaged in the high positive energy quadrant or recovering your energy by spending time doing things in the low positive energy quadrant.

Definition of Terms

The low positive energy quadrant consists of doing activities that leave you relaxed, mellow, peaceful, tranquil and serene. For me, that means reading a good book or watching a good movie or spending time with certain people with whom I’m on the same sympathetic wavelength.

For you, such positive-energy producing activities may include fishing, golf, sitting in your porch swing, listening to music, going for a bike ride or stroll, or any number of things. The important point is this: unless you spend sufficient short periods throughout your day in intermitten recovery, you’ll burn out and experience a host of other unpleasant symptoms.

Is It Really That Important?

Yes, if you spend all day writing furiously on your novel, zipping along in your high energy positive quadrant, you’ll produce an amazing amount of work. That day, anyway. Maybe even two days in a row, but that will be it.

By relentlessly spending mental energy without recovery, you’ll be tired, anxious, irritable–and self-doubt will inevitably set in. In a tired state, our stories stink, our ideas sound hackneyed, and our prose deadly dull. At that point, we end up taking off more time from the writing than we would have if we’d made ourselves take those intermittent breaks throughout the writing day.

The Pay-Off

What’s the result of taking those short “low positive energy” recovery breaks? You’ll come back to your work more energized, less ache-y in the neck and back, and more emotionally upbeat.

The emotional component is just as important as your physical energy level! Defusing the bombs of self-doubt and anxiety will help your writing as much as feeling re-energized. And in the end, you’ll write more, not less, by taking the short breaks throughout the day.

Give it a try for a week and see. I think you’ll be amazed.

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Yesterday on a long Skype call, I talked with a writer friend about what fuels our writing. For me, my favorite books (both in terms of the writing and how well they did after publication) were fueled by some kind of pain or wound. Something difficult that I was going through would spark an idea for a book, and the drive to solve the problem provided the passion and energy to see the story through to completion.

Energy from hurts and wounds and pain can be very useful to you as a writer. But, if you’re just wounded, does that automatically translate into books others will want to read? No. As Bill O’Hanlon says in Write is a Verb, “in order to have your wound fuel your writing process, the hurt or negative energy needs to be turned into creative energy, informing or driving your writing. It’s not enough to be wounded; you must find a way to turn that wound into energy for your writing.”

Pain = Energy for Writing

He quoted many authors (some quite famous) who had tragedies befall them, but they took the pain and turned around to write some of the most gripping books of our time on the very subject that nearly destroyed them. It doesn’t have to be a wound the size of the Grand Canyon either (a child being kidnapped, losing your home in a hurricane, both parents dying from cancer the same month). It isn’t the size of the wound–it’s what you do with it that counts.

Just Let It All Hang Out?

In order for your pain to be useful to you as a writer, you’ll need to step back a bit and distance yourself from it. Otherwise you won’t be able to see the story possibilities in it. You’ll be too hung up on the facts. (”But it really HAPPENED this way!” you protest.) Yes, but facts need to be shaped a lot if you’re going to create a story or article or book from those facts. (The truth of your experience can shine through, despite changing some facts.)

Facts will need to change in order to create well-rounded characters, and the plot still needs a beginning, middle, climax and ending. Things will be added–and subtracted–from your experience to make a better story. If you can’t do that, you’re probably still too wounded to turn the experience into a viable story.

“Make no mistake. I have seen screeds full of anger, self-pity, or hate that I think will never (and should never) be published,” says O’Hanlon. “They are simply expressions of the author’s pain, more like a journal entry than a book. They are self-indulgent and should be kept private… In order to turn that pain and anger into a book, the writing needs to somehow turn the personal into the universal.” In other words, the book needs to speak to other readers in a way that helps or nourishes them.

Identify Your Writing Energy

How can you tell if your pain and wounds might be energy for your writing? Here are four questions to ask yourself, suggested by the author. They can pinpoint sources of writing energy in your life just waiting to be tapped into.

• What do you care about so deeply or get so excited about that you talk about it to anyone who will listen?
• What upsets you so much that you are compelled to write about it or include the theme in your book?
• What are you afraid to write but know is a deep truth?
• Who are you afraid will disapprove of your writing or be upset by it?
• What fears could you write and perhaps work through by writing?

Take some time this weekend with those questions and a journal. Or write them on a card and take a long walk while you think about the answers. You may not be as blocked or depressed as you fear. You may simply be sitting over a deep pool of writing energy that’s just waiting for you.

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Have you reached a point in your writing career where you’re not as gung-ho as you were? Your fingers aren’t as fast on the keyboard, your neck gets stiff more quickly, or sleepiness overtakes you before you’ve written more than a page?

Maybe you’re in need of renewal.

Like the Eagle

I read a fascinating bit of information about bald eagles today. There comes a time when an eagle can no longer take off as quickly or fly at top speed, when his sharp talons have grown dull, when calcifications have formed on his beak, and his feathers are worn. Did you know that this smart bald eagle takes time to renew himself at this point?

He goes away alone, sits on a high rock close to the sun, and begins to pluck out all his feathers, one by one. (He may have 7,000 feathers! Talk about pain!) Then he finds a stream to clean himself of the caked mud, parasites, and insects he’s collected. When he’s clean and nearly naked, he sits in the sun and waits.

Renewal

During the waiting period–up to forty days–the eagle sharpens his talons and beak on the rock. He beats the calcifications off his beak. He waits for his feathers to grow back in. Much of the time he rests. He may look battered, he may feel weak, but he is being renewed.

Writers need renewal too. Are you at that point? Have there been one too many rejections or disappointments lately? Have you given it your all for months (maybe years), but without seemingly much progress?

If that’s the case, you may want to carve out some renewal time for yourself before disappointment becomes despair, before the rejections make you give up, before natural tiredness becomes burnout, before brain sludge becomes writer’s block.

Stumped for ideas on how to renew the writer within? One place to start is Monday’s blog post on restoring balance in your life. I mentioned a good resource there. What are some of YOUR favorite ways to find renewal (both short-term and when you need a deeper rest?) Please share!

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If someone graded you on self-care or self-nurturing, how would you do? Most of us–especially women–would flunk the evaulation. And if you’re also a writer, that can spell trouble.

What’s Your Excuse?

As women, we’re taught to meet everyone else’s needs before we nurture ourselves. And we do so, mostly without complaint, until we drop of exhaustion or illness. We de-value self-nurturing and self-care, putting it at the end of our lengthy list of Things To Do.

Back in 1992, during a particularly harrowing year, I bought a book that I recently re-read. I was delighted to see it has been reissued. The Woman’s Comfort Book: A Self-Nurturing Guide for Restoring Balance in Your Life by Jennifer Louden is chock full of some of the most fun and practical and specific ways you can incorporate self-nurturing activities into your life. The book was written after a year of trauma that left the author unable to write or relax.

As she put it, “I needed to trust what my inner voice was telling me, which was to slow down, take some time to care for me. But I felt too guilty about not being ambitious to heed my intuition. And so a dangerous prison formed: I couldn’t take time to care for myself because I felt I should keep working, but I couldn’t write because I wasn’t nurturing myself. What a mess!”

What’s Your Problem?

One of the best features of the book is a big chart that lists nearly eighty ailments you might have, then the corresponding short chapters that might help that problem. For example, if you feel “deprived,” she suggests the activities in the chapters entitled “Checking Your Basic Needs,” “Comfort Journal,” “A Self-Care Schedule,” “A Day Off,” “Heal Your Habitat,” and several others. If your problem is feeling joyless, you might try the chapters on “Your Nurturing Voice,” “Reading as a Child,” “Seasonal Comforts” or “Animal Antidotes.”

Her ideas are budget-minded (the only kind that work for me), and they are things you can do in your own home. For example, one chapter is on creating a personal sanctuary for yourself. I intend to use a few of her suggestions to rearrange a corner of my office, “walling off” a section with my freestanding bookshelves, moving a small rocker to that corner, adding some plants, a large framed poster of the English countryside, and a small rug to distinguish my sanctuary.

Courage, Fortitude, Boldness

The author claims that it “takes courage to make nurturing yourself a priority. It takes fortitude to meet your own needs. It takes boldness to listen to and trust your intuition.” If it’s been years since you allowed yourself to make self-care a priority, I think her statement is true. I know it was in my own case.

Ms. Louden also asserts that “deserving time to care for yourself is not something you earn…Taking care of yourself is not a reward for getting ten thousand things done today.”

Don’t Wait–Act Now!

There’s no need to wait until you’re burned out with a severe writer’s block to take care of yourself. A little daily self-nurturing goes a long way toward avoiding such conditions. And if you need someone to give you permission to do so, consider it done! I am ordering you to take good care of yourself!

Don’t know where to start? Then I really urge you to get a copy of Ms. Louden’s book and sample some of her fifty chapters of ideas. I know you’ll find something you’ll love!

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