How to Make & Keep Friends: Tips for Kids to Overcome 50 Common Social Challenges
by Nadine Briggs & Donna Shea
Age 8+ 142 pages
“Donna Shea, Director of The Peter Pan Center an Nadine Briggs, Director of Simply Social Kid are passionate about helping kids make and keep friends. They have spent years working with children who experience mild to moderate social difficulties and understand that social nuances can and should be taught. Parents and kids often need quick social skills advice that is easily understood and even easier to do in the moment. How to Make & Keep Friends provides 500 tips for children to learn how to manage 50 common social challenges in easy to digest top-ten lists. For parents and professionals check out How to Make & Keep Friends: Coaching Children for Social Success”
Introduction for Parents & Educators
“Welcome to How to Make and Keep Friends! Many kids struggle with social nuances which can make it difficult for them to form lasting friendships. Our tips have been successful for children with mild to moderate social challenges.”
Introduction for Kids
“Welcome to our book, How to Make and Keep Friends! We wrote this book for kids because we understand that making and keeping friends can be really hard to do sometimes. We help lots of kids learn how to get better at making and keeping friends, and with this book, we can help you too.”
About the Book
There are four sections in the book, each specializing in one particular area. The first contains tips for normal social situations and the common problems that can occur, including making new friends and figuring out body language and other non-verbal communications. The second section contains tips to help kids enjoy social success, such as knowing the difference between sharing something as opposed to bragging and handling embarrassment, anger, and impulsiveness. Section 3 covers the tough subject of being a good friend. This includes playing fair, playdates, proper etiquette, and even good table manners. The final section has suggestions for handling social challenges such as bullying, jealousy, and knowing when and how to get adult help.
Interestingly, the subjects in each section have suggestions and tips in lists of ten, rather than explaining problems or solutions. The idea is to allow kids and parents to open the book, find the problem, look through the ten suggestions, then go out and immediately use the chosen tip. Number one is not necessarily better than number ten, nor is ten better than one. What works best depends upon your child, and the situation. Most of the tips are great, though some—mostly verbal suggestions are not kid-friendly.
For example, in “How to Greet Others and Enter a Room or Place:” one friend greets another—your child—by saying, “Hello, how are you today?” Not many kids speak like an adult. They will say, “Hi,” or maybe “What’s up?” or “You okay?” but not “Hello, how are you today?” Even if they did, any kid who responds, “I’m fine, thanks, and how are you?” will be met with a funny stare and maybe a laugh. Leave out “and how are you” unless it was Aunt Mildred who asked. Parent’s need to make sure their child still sounds like a kid.
I like that How to Make and Keep Friends is for the parent as much as it is for the child. Under the heading Working Things Out, adults are reminded that when they tell their kids to “just work it out,” their child may not know what to do. Without a parent’s help, a child may end up in worse shape than before. For this reason, I think parents need to read this before or, preferably with, their child. Doing so might help the parent understand their child’s difficulties. Parents need to know when to help and when to step back.
The writing style of Ms. Briggs and Ms. Shea is conversational. A few sentences need a good editor’s pen, but overall this is a well-written guide kids and parents will find easy to read. There are no illustrations. I think a few, maybe at the head of each chapter, would have punched up the text and made the book look more like a guide for kids. And, admittedly, I like illustrations in books for kids. They give the eye a nice break, especially when the subject becomes emotional.
I truly like How to Make and Keep Friends. Kids need somewhere to turn and many of the suggestions are excellent.
“Being impulsive means doing or saying things without stopping to think first.” (tip 1) “When you have strong feelings like excitement or anger, breathe slowly and deeply to calm yourself down, since these are times when you might be impulsive” (tip 10)
Bad Peer Pressure:
“If someone is doing something wrong (like swearing) and wants you to do it too, you have the choice to say no. Remember choice is power.” (tip 3)
“The best thing to do is to not make a big deal—if no one says anything, just be quiet and let it go” (tip 2) “Try to remove yourself from the situation. Take a break, especially if you feel like you might cry.” (tip 6)
The book is dedicated to “the “what” to do rather than the “why” it needs to be done.” Hence, the ten tips for each problem. I am not a fan of “do” without knowing “why.” I never found this to work long term, yet How to Make and Keep Friends, with the tools and suggestions they do give kids, is impressive. Included is a reading reference guide for both kids and parents, a glossary of terms, and five ways to draw sides when choosing sides or deciding who plays first. Adults can incorporate most of the tips and suggestions into their own life. Bullying, making new friends, and not knowing what to do in social situations does not stop once someone reaches the age of 18. Until then, How to Make and Keep Friends will give kids a treasure of social tips and suggestions to guide them through the perilous seas of sticky social situations.
Learn more about How to Make and Keep Friends HERE!
Purchase a copy of How to Make and Keep Friends at Amazon—B&N—Book Website—ask your local bookstore.
Donna Shea is the director of The Peter Pan Center. Learn more about her and her center at: Ms. Shea’s website—linkedin—facebook—twitter & The Peter Pan Center’s website—G+—facebook—twitter
Nadine Briggs is the director of Simply Social Kids. Learn more about her and her center at: Ms. Brigg’s website—linkedin—facebook—twitter & Simply Social Kids’ website—blog—facebook—twitter
ALSO AVAILABLE FROM BRIGGS & SHEA
How To Make And Keep Friends: Coaching Children For Social Success
HOW TO MAKE & KEEP FRIENDS: TIPS FOR KIDS TO OVERCOME 50 COMMON SOCIAL CHALLENGES. Text copyright © 2011 by Nadine Briggs and Donna Shea. Reproduced by permission of the authors, Donna Shea and Nadine Briggs.
Filed under: 4stars
, Debut Author
, Library Donated Books
, Middle Grade
Tagged: children's book reviews
, Donna Shea
, guide for children
, guide for parents
, Nadine Briggs
, nonfiction kids book
, Simply Social Kids
, social situations
, The Peter Pan Center
Windsor The Bullied Wooly Mammoth
by Keith Lohnes
Linda Manne, illustrator
Age 6 to 9 72 pages
Amazon Author Description (unedited)
“Walking home from school alone, Windsor the Wooly Mammoth was startled to hear the shouting. Looking up, peering at him from a stone perch, was a mean Tyrannosaurus Rex named Trevor. At that moment, Windsor discovered the shouting was directed at him. The cruel words poked like tiny pins all over Windsor’s body. Why would someone say cruel things to me? I haven’t done anything to him! Windsor did his best to scurry away as fast as possible while all of his friends at school looked on in astonishment. Feeling trapped, alone and isolated, Windsor was confused at Trevor’s behavior. The story takes a turn when Windsor’s best friend Marvin steps into (sic) help. Marvin was concerned that Windsor did not know how to deal with Trevor’s bullying. Being a quiet, shy Mammoth, Windsor didn’t want anyone to know what was happening. Marvin knew better. Identifying the bully and immediately dealing with the events is the only way to make it stop. So Marvin enlisted the help of his friends and went to speak to Trevor about his bullying. In the beginning Trevor was very defensive. Over time however, Trevor began to understand that being a bully made him look bad and treating others poorly was not good for himself or anyone else. As the story and the characters evolve, bullying becomes evident. The resolution is for everyone to come together to prevent the behavior. In the end, Trevor discovers Windsor is a pretty nice Mammoth and they become great friends.”
“All the other Dinosaurs liked t play in the field after school, except for Winsor the Wooly Mammoth.”
Windsor loved to read so much that instead of playing with friends after school he reads. On the way home from school, Trevor yelled mean things at Windsor, called him names and threatened to knock his glasses off his face. Windsor was “a geek” because “all you do is read.” Windsor ignored Trevor, but still felt frightened. Trevor’s words and his taunting made Windsor feel bad about himself. The other young dinosaurs said nothing to Trevor. Some even laughed along with him. No one did a thing to help Windsor.
Everyone knew Windsor liked to read Jurassic Book, a dinosaur social network. Trevor went on the website and wrote mean things about Windsor and Betty Brontosaurus. None of what Trevor wrote was true. Soon dinosaurs who did not know Windsor wrote bad things about him. When he found out, Windsor knew the others would believe the lies. Windsor became so despondent that he no longer wanted to live.
Marvin, Windsor’s best friend, told him to tell someone about Trevor’s bullying. Windsor did not want anyone to know. Marvin went to Betty Brontosaurus for help. Betty talked to all the other kids and explained that what Trevor did to Windsor was mean, hurtful, and wrong. Then Betty talked to Trevor. Trevor responded to Betty by laughing and refused to stop bullying Windsor. Marvin would not give up. He decided to gather all the kids and confront Trevor as a group. Would it help?
Windsor the Bullied Wooly Mammoth is a cautionary tale about bullying. The bullied kid is different from the other kids. He likes to be alone and read. One dinosaur, Trevor, decides to bully Windsor. Marvin, who is a mouse and Windsor’s best friend, assumes Trevor is lonely because his meanness meant none of the other dinosaurs would play with him. Bullies often are not lonely people or dinosaurs. Kids gathered around Trevor and he considered a few of them friends. I think this missed the mark—in this story—but the author is true when saying bullies are often lonely kids. Most often, though, it is the bullied kid who becomes lonely and alone.
The text is long. Little kids will have a tough time keeping their attention on the story. The story needs tightened to reduce redundancy, correct punctuation errors, and help the story move along smoothly. Plus, a credit page needs added to the front. Before—on occasion after— a character speaks, the narrator explains what the character will say and why. This happens so often it becomes annoying. It is not necessary to alert the reader to what the character will say or why and then have the character repeat, sometimes verbatim, what the narrator just explained. I felt like the narrator did not trust that readers would catch on to the story.
Betty also explained that she wanted to get to know Trevor a little better.
Betty smiling at Trevor said, “And one other thing Trevor, I would like to get to know you a little better. Most of us don’t know you very well either.”
There were many books about bullies last year and more on the way this year. Windsor the Bullied Wooly Mammoth may be the most ambitious. Usually, we learn about the bullied, how they are bullied, and what to do about that bully. Windsor the Bullied Wooly Mammoth also lets us know how those witnessing the bullying, but not part of it, feel and how they can help, plus why the bully acts as he or she does. Every angle is covered.
The large sized book has great illustrations on one-half of the spread. The dinosaur and the mouse are cute with their big bright eyes. The dinosaurs have cherry-bright tongues and have different colored complexions. Windsor is the only one to wear eyeglasses and look geeky. He really is out of place in this dinoland. Kids will enjoy the illustrations. The art draws your eye to that side of the spread every time. The back of the cover has a laughing Trevor with the words, “Bullies aren’t born . . . bullies are made!”
Learn more about Windsor the Bullied Wooly Mammoth HERE.
Buy Windsor the Bullied Wooly Mammoth at Amazon—B&N—Createspace—ask your local bookstore
Links for the author, Keith Lohnes: blog facebook createspace
Links for illustrator, Linda Manne: flickr freelanced
WINDSOR THE BULLIED WOOLY MAMMOTH. Text copyright © 2013 by Keith Lohnes. Illustrations copyright © 2013 by Linda Manne. Reproduce by permission of the author, Keith Lohnes.
Filed under: 4stars
, Children's Books
, Debut Author
, Picture Book
, being bullied
, children's book reviews
, Keith Lohnes
, Linda Manne
, picture book
, wooly mammoths
. . The Adventures of Tomato and Pea, Book 1: A Bad Idea By Erik Weibel CreateSpace 4 Stars .. Back Cover: For years the evil villain Wintergreen has tried to destroy super crime-stopper, Tomato, and his sidekick, Pea, and take over planet Oarg. In a plan gone wrong, Wintergreen traps himself along with his …
.. Superman Fights for Truth! (Dc Comics) by Donald Lemke & Ethen Beavers Picture Window Books 4 Stars .. About the Story: Someone has stolen from the grocer and it is up to Superman to catch the thief and returns the goods. Opening: Superman hears a cry for help. “Titano took my bananas!” yells a …
. Is It Big or Is It Little? by Claudia Rueda Eerdmans Books for Young Readers 4 Stars . Back Cover: To a mouse, nearly everything looks big—but to the cat that chases him, things look a bit different. Opening: Is it BIG? Or is it little? Is it DEEP? Or is it shallow? About …
. The Middle Sheep (Ernie and Maud) By Frances Watt Judy Watson, illustrator Eerdmans Books for Young Readers 4 Star . Back Cover: The Adventures of Extraordinary Ernie and Marvelous Maud continue . . . but what—or who—is making the usually cheerful and dependable Maud so grumpy? And why are she and Ernie arguing all …
I Came From the Water Vanita Oelschlager, author Mike Blanc, illustrator 4 Stars ………………………………….. I Came from Water (subtitled), One Haitian Boy’s Incredible Tale of Survival, is a story based on true events, told from the viewpoint of a surviving child. Moses was an infant when floods destroyed his hometown killing many people, including his [...]
January 21 to 25, 2013: ”NO NAME CALLING WEEK” MYTH OF THE WEEK: ”Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” ЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖЖ Enslow Publishers, Inc. Enslow Publishing was established in 1976 by Ridley M. Enslow. a veteran of several New York publishing houses. Today, his two sons, Mark and Brian, run it. Located …
. Manner-Man by Sherrill S. Cannon Illustrated by Kalpart Strategic Book Publishing and Rights Co. 4 Stars From Website: This dynamic superhero helps children learn to cope with bullies and teaches them ways to be considerate of others. Manner-Man incorporates messages and characters found within some of Cannon’s earlier books – and shows children how …
. Malcolm Finney Medical Detective – The Case of… Itch and Rash by Erika Kimble illustrated by Laurel Winters Bandages & Boo-Boos Press 4 Stars Back Cover: Malcolm Finney, Medical Detective Series: The Case of Itch and Rash, is an adventurous story that explores the skin disease called eczema. It is a book that teaches …
Poopendous! by Artie Bennett illustrations by Mike Moran Blue Apple Books 4 Stars . Inside Jacket: . . . . . . . . . Ever wanted to ask about it, but felt a little shy? Inside these pages …
Ducklings in a Row by Renee Heiss illustrated by Matthew B. Holcomb Character Publishing 4 Star . Back Cover: When Mama Duck asks her ducklings to arrange themselves from One to Ten, the baby ducks learn much more than sequencing skills. In Ducklings in a Row, ten unique duckling personalities combine to gorm a humorous …
.. The Wizard of Oz by Beth Bracken Capstone Young Readers 4 Stars .. Back Cover: Film stills and original dialogue from the beloved movie The Wizard of Oz tell the tale of a young girl named Dorothy, who flew over the rainbow with her dog, Toto, befriends a Tin Man, a Scarecrow, and a …
.. The Boy Who Swam with Piranhas by David Almond Oliver Jeffers, illustrator Candlewick Press 4 Stars Inside Jacket: Since all the jobs on the quayside disappeared, Stan’s Uncle Ernie has developed an extraordinary fascination with canning fish. Overnight, life at 69 Fish Quay Lane has turned barmy. But when Uncle Ernie’s madcap obsession takes …
4 Stars Seymour's Christmas Wish Jane Matyger Javier Duarte Mirror Publishing 28 Pages Ages: 3 + ..................... ...................... Back Cover: Seymour, a tiny, tiny mouse, lives at the North Pole. Each Christmas Eve, he shines Rudolph’s red nose before Santa’s big trip. This year Seymour has a special wish . . . a wish that [...]
4 Stars Animal Andy Kathy Sattem Rygg 144 Pages Ages: 8 to 12 .................... .................. Back Cover: Ten-year-old Andy Ohman is spending his summer working at the Aksarben City Zoo where his dad is the curator. There are rumors the city might close the zoo due to budget cuts. An anonymous donor has given the [...]
4 Star The Templar Chronicles, Book 1: Jack Templar Monster Hunter Jeff Gunhus 184 Pages Ages 8 to 12 …………………….. Back Cover: If you have this book in your hands, I assume you are already a monster hunter or in training to become one. I hope my story helps you in the many fights ahead. However, [...]
4 Stars Chase Danger, Super Spy: Pirates of Pineapple Island Chase & Lisa Olivera Adam Goodman 32 Pages: Ages: 4 to 7 ................... From Website: 7-year-old super-spies Chase Danger and Princess Ali Bali must think fast when they discover pirates have stolen Zalezgon’s magical pineapples. But that’s not all! Ali’s little brother Aiden has been [...]
CHRISTMAS BOOKS FOR 2012 Today we have a sampling of seven Christmas Books. The first five are new to Kid Lit Reviews. Next to each small cover is the beginning of the review. Click on the link “HERE” and you will see the full review. At the bottom of each review will be a link [...]
4 Stars The Christmas Story Karen Williamson Marie Allen 104 Pages Ages: 3+ Back Cover: The Christmas Story retells simply but memorably the whole story of the first Christmas—from the angel’s wonderful news for Mary to the quest of the wise men. ………………………. The Christmas Story is a four-chapter book for ages three and up, [...]
4 Stars Pobble’s Way Simon Van Booy Wendy Edelson 32 Pages Ages: 4 to 8 Inside Jacket: Pobble’s evening walk with Daddy is a magical adventure in which branches wear sleeves of snow and mushrooms become frog umbrellas. When Pobble’s mitten—small and pink and as soft as a bunny’s chin—is lost on the path, woodland animals gather to discuss [...]
4 Stars Drummer Boy of John John Mark Greenwood Frané Lessac Lee and Low Books Pages: 32 Ages: 4+ Jacket: Carnival is coming and the villagers of John John, Trinidad, are getting ready to jump up and celebrate with music dancing, and a parade. Best of all, the Roti King has promised free rotis—tasty friend [...]
4 Stars Chasing Watermelons Kevin White Rex White 32 Pages Ages: 3 to 6 ……………… Press Release: When Duck opens a crate of watermelons for a watermelon feast, they begin to roll. Duck chases after them. One by one, Duck invites Goat, Pig, Chicken, and Cow to join the chase by promising, “If you help, [...]
I Couldn’t Love You More by Jason Ingram & Matt Hammitt illustrated by Polona Lovsin 4 stars ……….. Back Cover: I couldn’t love you more is the message of a parent to a child. While it depicts the immense love a parent has or a child, it highlights on an even deeper level the unconditional [...]
…………………… Victricia Malicia: Book-Loving Buccaneer Carrie Clickard, author Mark Meyers, illustrator 4 Stars ………….. Inside Front Jacket: Victricia Malicia Barrett may have been born on a pirate ship and raised in all the best pirate ways, but she sure is a wreck on deck. Her knots slip, she falls from the rigging, and rats abandon [...]