I was wrong–again.

For twenty years, I’ve told students and wannabe writers that you have to put the writing first! Do it before other things take over your day.

Fight the impulse to clean your kitchen first, or straighten your office, or clean up the mess the kids made before leaving for school.

“But I can’t work in chaos,” writers protest.

You know what? Neither can I anymore–at least not well! And when I force myself to, the work is doubly tiring. Doubly stressful. Much less satisfying.

Energy Drains in Disguise

Something I read today made me realize my advice might be a tad off. Not wrong altogether, since if we don’t make writing some sort of priority, we won’t do it. However, to eliminate energy drains in your life, you need to look at the whole picture. Certainly all the things you do in a given day take your energy. Every action you take on your lengthy “to do” list uses energy.

What you may not realize is that actions you don’t take use energy as well. Your disorganized office, the piles of laundry on the bedroom floor, the stack of bills to pay, the two birthday gifts to buy, the clothing needing repair–all this drains your energy reserves as well. It happens whether you are looking at the unfinished business or just thinking about it.

It siphons off energy that could be used in a much more positive way. “These items on your mental ‘to do’ list, the ones you’ve been procrastinating about, distract you or make you feel guilty and drain the very energy you need to accomplish your goals.” (So says Cheryl Richardson in Take Time for Your Life.)

NOT an Excuse to Procrastinate

Taking care of the unfinished business that nags at your mind–and keeps you from feeling like you can settle down to write–may be necessary before you can tackle your writing assignment. Don’t go overboard though, or you’re just procrastinating. Washing the dirty dishes is one thing–taking time to replace the shelf paper in your pantry is something else.

Figure out the things that you MUST have done to feel at peace in your environment, and do those things ONLY. (It helps to do as many of them as you can the night before too.)

Eliminate the chaos in your environment, and you’ll eliminate a LOT of the chaos that blocks your writer’s mind. Now…off to clean my office.

Writers are opinionated people.

Our brains never seem to stop. We criticize because we “know” how things and people should be. This “critical editor component” of our personality is absolutely invaluable to the editing and revision process. If you can’t spot what’s wrong with a manuscript, you can’t fix it.

However, this same critical ability can cause writers to actually lose focus, allowing their writing hours to slip away with little or no work done.

Think About It

Many of us go through our daily lives with our internal critic or editor in charge. We don’t see the person right in front of us as he or she is (which may be perfectly fine.) Instead, that person reminds us of an ex-spouse, and we “see” characteristics that aren’t there. Stress!

Conversely, we think the person in front of us is “supposed” to be kind and supportive (our inner definition of parent/spouse/child/sibling). And yet many such relationships are anything but, leaving us hurt and upset because they should be supportive. More stress! Life rarely satisfies a person who lets the “shoulds” run his life.

Do we spend our time “shoulding”? We don’t see a child who is happily singing at the top of her voice. (That child should be more quiet in the store!) We don’t see an interesting shade of purple hair. (That teenager should resemble a miniature adult instead.) We don’t see the predator or user sometimes either–because trusted family members shouldn’t be such things. Our “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” color everything we observe.

Change Your Perspective

Our inner editor sometimes keeps us from seeing what’s in front of us. We are constantly “revising” the facts. So what’s the problem with that? You can’t accept–and get peace about–what you can’t honestly see or face. You stay stirred up–a condition rarely suited to being creative. Sometimes the simplest solutions evade us because we’re all riled up inside.

It reminds me of a story (you may also be familiar with) about “The River and the Lion: After the great rains, the lion was faced with crossing the river that had encircled him. Swimming was not in his nature, but it was either cross or die. The lion roared and charged at the river, almost drowning before he retreated. Many more times he attacked the water, and each time he failed to cross. Exhausted, the lion lay down, and in his quietness he heard the river say, “Never fight what isn’t here.”

Cautiously, the lion looked up and asked, “What isn’t here?”

“Your enemy isn’t here,” answered the river. “Just as you are a lion, I am merely a river.”

Now the lion sat very still and studied the ways of the river. After a while, he walked to where a certain current brushed against the shore, and stepping in, floated to the other side.

Control What You Can: Yourself

We also can’t gain peace of mind and the ability to focus unless we’re willing to give up trying to control everyone and everything in our environment. We spen

When re-reading Getting It Done by Andrew J. DuBrin, PH.D., I came to a section on dealing with procrastination. One suggestion is something I’d like your feedback on.

He said you can make progress with procrastination if you “compartmentalize spheres of life.” He says that if you have multiple demands on your time that seem overwhelming, “mentally wear the same blinders placed on horses so they can concentrate better on the race and not be distracted.”

Box It Up!

I would love to be able to do that on a regular basis! Are you able to compartmentalize? I agree with the author that procrastination is more tempting when multiple demands are swirling and competing in your mind.

I think that male writers have an advantage here. They seem able to put things in boxes, tape the lids shut, and then deal with one box at a time. (I know this for a fact because I can tell when I am being put in the “wife” box!)

Women, however, mix things up. Our concern for our child’s health or marriage problems or a sibling’s financial crisis “bleeds over” into our writing time. And we tend to feel guilty if we’re happily typing away while a member of our family is in trouble or needs us.

‘Fess Up

So…please share your wisdom with me. Men, if you can explain how to put things in boxes or make blinders work, please advise. Ladies, if you’ve figured out how to push aside your other concerns while you write, please share.

I bet we could all use some tips!

In the August edition of Randy Ingermanson’s free (wonderfully  helpful) newsletter, there was a link to a free e-book describing a new time management system Randy is using. (For back issues of Randy’s newsletter, go here.)

 Since “free” is one of my favorite words, and I’m always looking for ways to manage my time better, I downloaded it to skim.

Hooked!

Skimming quickly turned to reading carefully, and soon I’d read the whole 57-page e-book by Jim Stone called Clear Mind, Effective Action. It deals with the subject of “fractal planning.” Fractal has to do with breaking something large into smaller parts. (You can get the free e-book here.)

In some ways fractal planning is unique, and some parts are a combination of the best time management ideas from the past twenty years.

In the free e-book, the author explains how to implement his system on your own (on paper or spreadsheet or Word document), if you don’t want to subscribe to his service. (I’m using a Word doc–for now–to see how it goes. I have to admit that–so far–it has boosted my productivity and ability to focus significantly.) If you’d like to go directly to the Fractal Planner page and check out the features, you can do that here.

If you try the fractal planner or read the e-book, let me know. I’d like to hear about your experiences–plus or minus–if you try it out.

Here you go! Seven ways to help you get the writing done–and sold!

6 Things You Should Know About the Publishing World

7 Deadly Sins of Writing

5 Reasons Why You Need to Get Better at Saying ‘No’

10 Essential Rules of Poetry

7 Things Agents Want to See in a Query, and 9 Things They Don’t

7 Steps to Getting Unstuck and Becoming More Productive

3 Benefits of Building Your Own Platform

If you take yourself seriously, you will be taken seriously.

A common complaint among new writers is that friends and family members don’t take them–or their writing–seriously.

I tell them–truthfully–that the main thing they need to do is convince themselves that they are serious about their writing. Others will pick up on that attitude and start giving them the respect they crave.

Do You Need An Attitude Fix?

If you’re a self-employed, freelance writer, you’re in business. You’re creative–true. But you’re still in business if you want to make income from your writing. And often it is poor business attitudes that keep others from taking you seriously. Do an attitude check with the list below.

Are you harboring these unhelpful attitudes?

1) The “I’ll work when I please” attitude–Most of us are drawn to self-employed writing because we like the idea of being our own bosses. We can work when (and if) we so choose. But if you take this attitude to mean you can meet deadlines if nothing else comes up, you’ll never be taken seriously. It’s one thing to let an editor know you won’t be able to meet a deadline because you’re in the hospital and both arms are in traction. It’s quite another to miss a deadline because you’re hand crafting mini pinatas for your daughter’s birthday party.

2) The “I don’t have the money to be professional” attitude–You have to invest money to make money, say the experts. For example, if you’re advertising your resume-writing business with a brochure, get a good printer or have them professionally done. During the early years, I never had a publisher willing to foot the bill for flyers or bookmarks or other advertising. It came out of my pocket. [This is where I differ from the experts though. I didn't put anything on a credit card. I have a horrible fear of debt.] Since the family needed my book advances to live on, I would do “extras” to get whatever money I needed to run my office: an extra speech, an extra workshop, an extra critique. And when the “extra” money ran out, I stopped. Perhaps if I had been willing to put things on credit or had more expendable income, I could have increased book sales faster. I don’t know. But I do think you have to spend some  money to get established, even if it’s just for paper and ink. [That was me--I already had my husband's old college typewriter.]

3) The “I can’t charge more” attitude–Sad, but true. People tend to value what they pay for. Dogs that people pay big bucks for are treated so much better than free dogs from the pound. While you may choose to write or speak for free very early in your career, don’t let that period last long. [The only free stuff I used to do were talks at my children's schools as my parental/community contribution. I never wrote for free that I can remember. Even now, if I critique for free, it's because I'm trading with a writer friend who is giving me a free critique also.]

Early in my career I complained to another (more experienced) writer that I didn’t appreciate some of the disrespectful treatment I got at certain schools. Her reply? “Triple your speaking fee. You work too cheap. They’ll value you more.” With much fear and trembling, I did it. She

After a couple months this spring of unexpected work and lack of sleep, I’ve found myself battling severe procrastination the past few weeks. I’m getting rested up, but I’m so out of the writing habit that getting started has become a big issue.

Luckily I can usually find a resource on my own shelves!

(FYI: After you finish this post, you may want to read my article on writer’s block called “A Block by Any Other Name…”  at the Absolute Write website .)

A Different Take on Procrastination

One such resource is a book Kurt Vonnegut called “as well researched and helpful a book on writing as I’ve ever read.” It’s Write: 10 Days to Overcome Writer’s Block. Period. by Karen E. Peterson, Ph.D. [See Amazon's great used prices for this book!]

From the author’s website: “Writers want to write, but often find themselves whirling through cyberspace, glued to HBO with a box of doughnuts, careening off to the nearest Starbuck’s, and/or carving out last week’s fossilized spaghetti from the kitchen table.”

Sound familiar? This is what Dr. Karen E. Peterson— who has overcome writer’s block herself—calls ‘the write-or-flight response.’

Write? Or Flight?

In this revolutionary book, a psychologist and novelist presents an effective way to outwit writer’s block. Based on “new brain research and sound psychological principles,” this innovative program shows writers how to conquer writer’s block using:

• Exercises to conquer the “write-or-flight” response
• Techniques to create that elusive “writing mood”
• Parallel monologue and interior dialogue to jumpstart the writing process
• Checklists to see which side of the brain is blocking you

I fully recommend that little book because it worked for me. (I realize that it doesn’t mean it will work for you, but I think it’s worth a try if procrastination is an issue for you.) It explained the actual physical reasons why certain types of blocks occur–and what to do about them.

(Now, off to read “A Block by Any Other Name…” )

Before you go though, do YOU have a favorite block buster you could share?

Do you believe you are called to write? Or do you suspect you are?

If that’s true, why aren’t you pursuing your calling?

Food for Thought

This weekend I started reading Callings by Gregg Levoy, the author of a very practical book for writers called This Business of Writing. In Callings, he said some thought-provoking things that gave me pause.

I started writing thirty years ago, and until six months ago, there were many reasons why I couldn’t give my all-out devotion to writing: a full-time day job of teaching, raising four childrlen, multiple jobs in the church and community, serious health problems and surgeries, etc. But last fall I retired from teaching, my children are grown, and I can decide how much I babysit grandchildren and how much volunteer work I do. It’s a time I’ve been anticipating for three decades.

So…am I pursuing my writer’s calling with full devotion? I want to. I dream about it. I can almost taste it sometimes. But do I do it? No.

Why?

I’m not sure, but these quotes from Callings are helping me ask the right questions. Maybe these ideas will help you too.

• “Although we have the choice not to follow  a call, if we do not do so,..we’ll feel alienated from ourselves, listless and frustrated, and fitful with boredom, the common  cold of the soul. Life will feel so penetratingly dull and pointless that we may become angry, and turn the anger inward against ourselves (one definition of depression).”
• “Generally, people won’t pursue their callings until the fear of doing so is finally exceeded by the pain of not doing so.”
• “Perhaps the main reason that we ignore calls is that we instinctively know the price they’ll exact.”
• “All calls lead to some sacrifice because even just one choice closes the door on another, and some calls lead to much sacrifice, which may feel anything but blissful.”
• “At some level we need to devote everything, our whole selves. A part-time effort, a sorta-kinda commitment, an untested promise, won’t  suffice. You must know that you mean business, that you’re going to jump into it up to your eye sockets and not turn back at the last minute.”

Will the Rubber Meet the Road Now?

I’ve had thirty years of (by necessity) a “part-time effort” and “an untested promise.” Now that I have the time and could choose to do so, will I “jump into it up to [my] eye sockets”?

Is the pain of not doing so finally more than the fear of trying? Yes, I think so.

How about you?

[If you've decided to surrender to the c

There are times when the creative juices just aren't flowing. Usually that's because "we" are distracted by outside influences, such as money, lack of time, stress or just having to do too many things in too little amount of time. "We" can cave into this and become totally useless in out attempts at productivity, or we can get ourselves on track somehow.

When I was a little kid, I loved monster movies... the classics, like Frankenstein, Dracula.. all the old black and whites... like I said, The Classics. The problem with this, was that when I went to sleep, my imagination was in overdrive to the point of getting nightmares featuring said monsters. To save my parents from running into my room in the middle of the night, I developed this little trick of forcing myself to think of the monsters on purpose, and then mentally creating a huge bulldozer that would push them out of my head. Sounds a little wacky, but it worked for me.

It worked so well, that I used now as a cartoonist to force myself to focus... no lie. If I'm distracted by the Money Monster, the Too Many Projects Monster, or the I really need to kill this particular person Monster, I use the bulldozer trick. I envision a "force" in my head to just shove aside all the non creative things cluttering it up... put on some rock n roll (again, the classics), grab some green tea and get down to business.

So the next time you can't focus... get on your mental bulldozer, crank up the tunes, get your caffienated beverage of choice, and do what ya gotta do. Just sayin !

All writers are looking for time-saving strategies and tips to increase their productivity. With school getting out in a month, many writers need to streamline both their writing life and personal life. If this is YOU, you’re in luck!

If you have June’s The Writer magazine, read Kelly James-Enger’s article called “10 ways to work more efficiently.” And for some free articles on this subject…

Start Clicking!

Other Writer articles online filled with tips to improve your efficiency–and give you more time to write–include:

• “5 ways to juggle your writing, your job and family responsibilities” by Shirley Jump
• “A matter of time” by Guy Stewart
• “Setting up a productive work space” by Sharon Miller Cindrich
• “Quiet! Writer in the house” by Connie Heckert (my writer friend from Iowa!)
• “Writing on the Fly” by Sandra Hurtes

Reading these articles should give you several ideas to try. I found a couple I intend to put to work immediately!

Creativity is a mysterious concept to most of us. We don’t really understand what it is, where it comes from, why it leaves us, and how to make it “work” consistently. We give it a lot of power because of this.

Coaxing Creativity

However, says the author of The Soul Tells a Story, “if I know from experience that inspiration arrives under certain conditions, I will make sure to re-create the conditions that invited it initially. Thus my early experience comes to determine how it is I will work.”

After our vacation took an unexpected turn, I’ve had more time to reflect this week than the past five years combined. For four blissful days, I had no Internet connection, nowhere we had to be, plenty of books to read, places to walk, and time to think. I hadn’t really realized what an incredible luxury this is in the fast-paced world in which we live.

How Things Have Changed…

Because of marketing demands the last five years–both online and elsewhere–the writing life has been a bit frantic. I don’t know about you, but frenetic activity is not conducive to coaxing out my creativity. That much I already knew. But I hadn’t given much concentrated thought to what things did work for me.

Each writer is different. I know writers who must be surrounded by noise and people or loud music in order to write. I am just the opposite, preferring quiet and solitude when I can get it.

If you’re not sure what conditions are best for you, think back to when you started writing. How did you work best then? What conditions did you just naturally create for yourself? What are the non-negotiables you must have for your creativity to flourish?

Take a Self-Inventory

Here are some things to consider:

• Before writing, do you need some quiet time to think, meditate, or pray?
• Can you write at any time of day–or only at certain times?
• Can you write any place–or do you need your “office” to be the same each day?
• Can you write in tiny bits of time–or does your creativity absolutely require large chunks of time? Does it vary depending on the stage of your book?
• How much socializing do you need in order to be your most creative? (This includes time with writers and non-writers alike, time to “talk shop” and time to just have fun.)
• When you are stuck, does it help to read a book on craft (viewpoint, research, inspiration, etc.) to get your creativity flowing again?
• Does reading other writers’ books help you be more creative–or does it make you feel anxious as you compare yourself to them?
• Do you need a healthier diet or more sleep for your creativity to be at its peak? Or do you work best on short naps and skipping meals?
• What kind of critique at what point in your project is helpful? What kind is the kiss of death to your creativity? (When is your ego more fragile?)
• Do you work best with a deadline, or do deadlines make you freeze up? Do you do well with six-month deadlines but choke on series deadlines set every two months?
• Can you be creative when dealing with emotional upset? Do you need to solve family problems before you can settle down to write?

Take Time to Know Yourself

As we’ve said before, just because conditions aren’t perfect doesn’t mean you can’t be creative. We’ve all had to produce work under some appalling conditions. But if you have a choice, it’s lovely to set up your life and home and schedule a

We don’t like to talk about quitting or giving up on our dreams. But let’s be honest. Will every wannabe writer eventually land big contracts,  snag a well-known NY agent, and be sent on ten-city book tours? No.

Maybe your dreams are more modest, but you’ve worked at breaking into publishing for years. Should you continue the struggle? For how long? How do you know when to quit?

Asking the Wrong Question

I came across an excellent discussion from a blog post that is several years old, but the advice is timeless. Called “When to Quit,” it’s a lengthy article by Scott Young on this subject. I hope you’ll read it to the end.

One factor the article said to consider was how you feel on a day-to-day basis as you pursue your dream. How is the process affecting your life, your character, your growth? “So if you are pursuing your dream and you don’t think you are going to make it, the question of whether or not to quit doesn’t depend on your chance of success. The real question is whether pursuing this dream is causing you to grow. Does this path fill you with passion and enthusiasm? Do you feel alive?”

You may not agree with all his views, but I guarantee that the article will make you think–even if you have no intention of quitting. It might lead you to make a course correction however. And it will make you evaluate why you’re pursuing your particular dream–and that’s always a good thing!

If you have a minute, give me your reactions to the ideas in his article.

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“The healthy creative life is an intentional life, in which the person examines options and opportunities, necessities and desires, and makes his or her choices accordingly.”

 ~~(Vinita Hampton Wright) in The Soul Tells a Story

If you took time to ponder and write down answers to the questions posed in Monday’s blog, you gained a lot of information about your dreams and gifts. That knowledge is important. But knowledge alone isn’t enough. You must be intentional in using this knowledge to develop your creative life.

A Writing Life on Purpose

The healthy creative life involves practices that help further develop your gifts. If you want to write, you have the responsibility to develop practices that help you grow. (You also need to get rid of habits that hurt your writing–but that’s another post!) You can (and should) set goals, design rituals to help you get started (light candles, make tea, put on music) and form habits that help you both start and continue writing.

Here are some questions for you to answer to examine this part of your life. Even if you’ve been writing for a long time, I’d suggest answering the questions based on where you are now. I found them very helpful myself. Without meaning to, we can get off-track, our life circumstances can get us off course, or we might never have given this sufficient thought to begin with.

Now’s the Time!

Here are some more questions from The Soul Tells a Story. Brainstorm answers in your journal.

• How intentional (using planning or goals) have I been about developing my creativity?
• What opportunities am I looking for–and are these options open to me?
• What qualities do I want to nurture in my personality and lifestyle that will allow me to use my gifts in my writing?
• What rituals or practices always seem to work to help me do my writing?
• What other rituals and practices that I’ve heard about would I like to try?

It’s time to make some intentional choices! We won’t grow as writers unless we intend to grow and choose to grow. What’s a “growth choice” that you might like to make–and implement–very soon?

Announcement first, then today’s blog post… For those who wrote and asked when More Writer’s First Aid would be a print book, you can now buy a trade paperback at Amazon.com. Many of you are just like me–and still prefer a non-electronic book to hold. Comments from reviewers and bloggers can be found on my website.

What Am I Called to Write?

Do you have a writing gift? Do you have a knack with words? Do you feel an  inner desire to write? Most of you who read this blog said a resounding “yes!” to those questions a long time ago.

And yet, one of the most common email or conference questions I hear is, “How do I know what I’m supposed to write?”

So Many Possibilities!

Sometimes the confusion is about subject matter. Should you write homeschool educational materials? Tips on raising children?Picture books that help preschoolers overcome fears? Humorous books to make teens laugh?

Sometimes the question involves age groups. Should you focus on preschoolers,early childhood, lower or upper elementary, YA, adults? Should you zero in on one age group or be flexible, writing for all ages?

Sometimes we wonder about form. Should we try a verse novel? Rhyming picture books? Series fiction? Nonfiction with photographs? Hardcover stand-alone novels?

Clues to the Answers

The following set of questions from The Soul Tells a Story by Vinita Hampton Wright are some ways you can explore those questions and perhaps find some answers. Take time with each question–each one serves a particular purpose.

• The activity that gives me greatest joy is…
• The good qualities that best describe my life are…
• The help that people often solicit from me is…
• The part of my personality that I would most hate to lose is…
• The work that is most satisfying to me is…
• The activity that I feel drawn to, even when it’s scary, is…

Finding Your Writing Niche

When I began writing thirty years ago, I only knew two things: I loved to read, and I loved my small children. I read the ICL ad and something went off inside of me, like a little burst of fireworks.  Me? A writer? Neat!

But what kind of writing?

I assumed

(First re-read the post The Thought-Feeling-Behavior Cycle.)

After a couple of busy weekends (writing conferences to speak at) and other events, I was finally able to sit down for a lengthy time yesterday and write. Or so I thought.

I sat down all right, but once I finally had an uninterrupted moment to think, a certain situation that has been bothering me for months came flooding back. I couldn’t concentrate on my novel, and I was up and down. I walked. I ate. I sorted laundry. I worried. I ate some more. Later in the day, I Skyped a friend. But I didn’t write until…

Ah, Yes, I Remember

I picked up a book by Kelly L. Stone, author of Living Write: the secret to inviting your craft into your daily life. I flipped through it and landed on the chapter called “Acting As If.” I knew this was a phrase from my old recovery group days basically meaning “fake it till you make it.”

I reviewed the thoughts-feelings-action cycle. Since my thoughts were unruly, and my feelings were haywire, I figured that “acting like a writer anyway” was my best option. I read her chapter on “Acting As If.” Here are a couple snippets to think about:

• People draw conclusions about themselves through observation of their own behavior just as they draw conclusions about other people based on observation of their behavior.
• Simply act a certain way based on your ideal Writer Self-Image, and over time, you become what you are acting.

Attack that Cycle!

A licensed professional counselor, Stone had many practical suggestions about how to act “as if” you’re a confident writer, act “as if” you’re a self-motivated writer, act “as if” you’re a self-disciplined writer, act “as if” you’re a future-focused writer, and act “as if” you’re a task-oriented writer. [I definitely recommend her book.]

I used one suggestion in the “task-oriented” section, acted “as if,” and got to work. Even though it was later in the day, I had the evening free and ended up with one of the most productive writing days I’d had in a long time. (I’m re-reading that chapter first thing today though!)

Don’t give up. We’re all in this together, and I’m grateful for writers like Kelly Stone who share what works!

[NOTE: Thanks for the inquiries about the release date for the paperback of More Writer's First Aid. I thought it would be yesterday, but it looks like this weekend. I will certainly let you know!]

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[Back in December I told you about an online writing class I planned to take. I promised to follow up on it when it was over. This is my review.]

I just finished Jordan Rosenfeld’s eight-week online writing class called “Fiction’s Magic Ingredient.” She’s the author of that very helpful book Make A Scene: Crafting a Powerful Story One Scene at a Time.

Here’s the class arrangement: there was material to read each week, then send-in assignments (usually two assignments ranging from 500 to 1000 words long) which Jordan critiqued and returned within a few days. We could write new material or apply the lessons to a work in progress (which I did). [More about the class below.]

When I first read through the exercises Jordan wanted us to do, I tried them out in my head, and they sounded easy. On paper, though, it was a different story!

The Rubber Meets the Road

Heather Sellers (in Chapter After Chapter) remarked on this phenomenon. “A failing we writers have is that we confuse the voices in our heads with writing; we tend to do exercises in our heads because thinking and writing feel so closely related…What’s in your head does not count, not for sculpture, not for book writing. Pencil on paper is what matters.”

The work we all did for Jordan’s class reminded me of such writing exercises. I often read the exercises and think I understand and will be able to whip it off in no time flat. Not so! 

Even after revising each assignment several times, Jordan’s insightful critiques came back with more suggestions on how to take the concept further, go deeper, weed out the clichés, and much more.  I felt challenged–and grateful that I got my money’s worth. I have gone on to apply the lessons to my novel this week.

Comparing Prices

I don’t mean to over-emphasize the money issue, but most of us need to get the most bang for our buck that we can. I was comparing the cost of Jordan’s class (I signed up early to get her discount) and was very pleased with what I received.

The material sent each week (5-6 single spaced pages) was new material, not excerpts from Jordan’s excellent Make a Scene book. The new material built on that. The amount of critiquing we received really surprised me. It was much more than you get at a writer’s conference where you pay extra for a faculty critique.

Last year I signed up and paid for (in advance) two writing conferences. The cost of each conference (not including hotel room or food) plus the personal critique (which was extra) was as much or more than Jordan’s online class–and you got much less for it, in my opinion.

So Flexible!

The other thing I noticed was related to health and family issues. About the two conferences I signed up for last year: I had a family emergency during the first one and was running a fever the other time–and missed b

1. Guidelines offer focus. Writing within parameters forces you to focus on your message. Word baggage is eliminated and the piece forms a tightly-written story. A theme provides focus, but it does not limit your imagination. Creativity in plot and word choice are limitless! Even genre-specific contests let you stretch your writing prowess by crafting a new world or twisting history.



2. Attitude is everything. Did I stop writing when I didn't win in class? Heck, no. I never gave up. Instead, the competition and my lack of "prized success" pushed me to develop my craft by tuning in to what wasn't working in my stories. I never viewed those works as failures. They just weren't what the instructor was looking for. A positive attitude makes a difference, and I was positive to continue trying!



3. Contests give writers permission to write. If you're set on entering a contest, you've given yourself permission to schedule time to write. Sometimes outside forces control the amount of time we dedicate to our craft, but knowing you have a deadline and plan to enter your best work gives you the say-so to make time to write.



4. Writing increases confidence. I've entered several poetry contests and I've experienced some success. It's a confidence boost! Even when I didn't win the grand prize, I made fantastic discoveries: what judges are looking for, what writing styles do or don't work, how other writers approach the challenge. These lessons also boost belief in my work.

Entering a writing contest may be a big step for a writer, but it's an action that will enhance your writing.

by LuAnn Schindler. Read more of LuAnn's work at her website. Graphic design by LuAnn Schindler

(C) Copyright wow-womenonwriting.com

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Cathy C. Hall said, on 3/9/2011 10:13:00 AM

Excellent points, LuAnn! I'm big on entering contests, for many of the reasons you stated. But I'll share another of my reasons for doing so: When you enter a state writer's contest (many states have writing associations), the entry fees are minimal, and you're helping that writing organization grow and provide services to their members. And P.S. You might even win. WHeee!

Neezes said, on 3/10/2011 11:41:00 AM

Very true! Nothing like a deadline and the fear of public scrutiny to crack on and bash a piece of writing into a respectable sort of shape. Writing groups and courses can have a similar effect, don't you think?

eeleenlee said, on 3/10/2011 12:31:00 PM

I entered and won a few contests. It is indeed very satisfying, but not as fulfilling as the journey.

AuthorTalia said, on 3/11/2011 1:40:00 AM

Since entering a contest includes a hefty fee, it can soon add up to a lot of money. Since the chances of winning is slim, I don't see why writers should enter these....

Audra Krell said, on 3/11/2011 9:45:00 AM

I've been writing for about 4 years and just in the past 2 weeks, started entering contests. I cannot believe how inspiring it is. It is so good for honing the craft, as you said.

@duthra said, on 3/11/2011 3:06:00 PM

I find competitions very inspiring, although I prefer no theme. It's a way of participating too, being out there. My stories have been short-listed a few times and that's a great spur to go that bit better next time. Some organisers publish the top 20, or top 10 stories too and that can be your first publication - huge boost. A stimulating post, thank you.

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I recently got a(nother) rejection for one of my manuscripts. I've really struggled with this one because of all my stories, it's the one that I feel is the most ready to hit the shelves. Yet it gets no love, and no feedback on why. I've picked the thing apart, looking for big picture items, recurring issues--anything to explain why it keeps getting rejected. And then it occurred to me. Maybe the manuscript itself isn't a problem. Maybe the problem is in my perception of my manuscript.

See, my story is a sweet historical fiction. Not edgy or dark.

Sweet.

I'm embarrassed to say that it took me more than a few tries to type that sentence. Why? Because while sweet is okay, it's ofted used interchangeably with saccharine, sugary, and bubble-gum, which are not. Because much of what's popular and successful today is dark and edgy, which my story most definitely is not.

But here's the bottom line: if I want to find the right agent and publisher for my story, I have to know who to target. In order to do that, I have to know exactly what kind of book I have. In order to do that, I have to be able to define my story objectively and honestly.

Moving forward, I will continue to look for agents who like historical fiction, specifically those who have recently acquired historical fiction projects. But I will also be looking at what kinds of stories they've acquired. If they're all dark, my story probably won't appeal to them.

So know thy story, fellow writers. Don't apologize for having written a sweet story, or one without vampires, or a western instead of a dystopian or an urban fantasy. Embrace your story and you'll have a much better chance of finding the perfect home for it.

58 Comments on No Apologies, last added: 3/9/2011

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Elaine AM Smith said, on 3/7/2011 1:13:00 AM

That is sad. Not enough internal or external conflict? There has to be agents who could place something different - less angsty. It obviously has an important place in your heart - so keep faith with it.
Have you thought about turning it into a script?

Precious said, on 3/7/2011 1:26:00 AM

Goodluck! I hope you will find the perfect agent and publisher for your sweet historical fiction! :) I haven't read much sweet stories. Almost all are dark. So this will be a change!

Pat Posner said, on 3/7/2011 2:35:00 AM

Great post, Becca; one I feel I could have written.
I had some 'nice' feedback on my ms but, ultimately, it was felt to be too quiet. Which, I guess, is another word for sweet.

Roberta Walker said, on 3/7/2011 3:32:00 AM

I love sweet :)

This is why I love Query Tracker so much, and I'll be re-making my lists as soon as this rewrite is finished and polished. I have some things in my novel that might be considered 'old and done', but I hope my slightly different perspective and the right agent will take it farther than a file in my hard drive!

Anne Gallagher said, on 3/7/2011 3:58:00 AM

Oh Becca, can I totally relate. I've written a sweet historical romance. Which has its own market yet, my book has more to it than "just" the romance. The Regency plays a major role behind the characters, there is intrigue and broken hearts, and it comes in at 90K. Nary a vampire, paranormal experience and NO sex to talk about. Talk about not being able to find a market.

And yes, even with all that it is still my favorite genre to write. This is book number two in a series. They say fasion comes back every ten years or so. Let's hope it does in books as well.

Beth said, on 3/7/2011 3:59:00 AM

I had a similar problem recently. I took a structure class and was getting some really strange comments about my ms. Comments I hadn't heard from people who had actually read it, then my cp pointed out to me it's the way I talk about it. I was focusing on the wrong aspects.
bethfred.com

Laura Pauling said, on 3/7/2011 4:25:00 AM

Hey, Becca. Thanks for being honest. I have several friends in the same position with a historical fiction. It's a hard way to break in, but not impossible. One of my friends had a recent breakthrough on her rewrite though - she really brought out the inner conflict (based on a primal theme - like love) from page one and upped the conflict too - so while reading I connected right away and forgot it was historical fiction. Best of luck! Keep querying!

Matthew Rush said, on 3/7/2011 4:28:00 AM

Well said. Thanks Becca!

Elouise82 said, on 3/7/2011 4:43:00 AM

Good thoughts this morning. I've been wondering if either of my two YA fantasies - the one already written, or the one still in the works - will ever appeal to anyone, as they have no vampires, no angels (fallen or otherwise) ... in fact, have nothing that seems to be so popular these days.

But they are the sort of story I prefer, which means there must be at least a few out there who agree, right? And if so, it's just a matter of finding the right agent. Thanks for the reminder and encouragement!

(Oh, and I always prefer sweet historicals - though not sickly-sweet, myself!)

Sarah said, on 3/7/2011 5:13:00 AM

Good advice!

Lindsay N. Currie said, on 3/7/2011 5:23:00 AM

I agree withyou 100%. Just because a manuscript doesn't seem to fit the concept of what's hot right now, or what is trendy, does not mean we should put it on the back burner or feel that it's a lesser work. If we believe in what we've written and feel passionately about it, chances are. . . someone else will too:)

Janet, said, on 3/7/2011 5:31:00 AM

Good luck with finding an agent. I do not write edgy or dark either and probably never will. Soon, I am hoping the reading public will get tired of vampires and be ready to move on to something else.

D U Okonkwo said, on 3/7/2011 6:30:00 AM

I hear what you're saying here. A good idea may also be to look at agents who like Southern fiction, though not historical per se, but maybe they'll look in that area too?

Best of luck and don't give up! :o)

Angela Ackerman said, on 3/7/2011 6:48:00 AM

Amen, Becca. Great post, and something we can all relate to. And for the record, it's a great story, well written and the characters are ones you can connect to. I think whoever lands this one will be lucky indeed. :)

Angela <---fangirl for all Becca's stories. I've learned so much from her!

Angela Felsted said, on 3/7/2011 6:49:00 AM

I think it's great that you've written a sweet story. Now I want to read it.

Deb said, on 3/7/2011 6:51:00 AM

I so agree, Becca. It will find a home. And thank you for the reminder for all of us to do that...embrace the stories we believe in.

Amanda Hoving said, on 3/7/2011 6:57:00 AM

I have a short story like this that I LOVE, but that keeps getting put back into my cabinet o' misfit ideas. Someday. Someday. (sigh) Best of luck to you!

Jacqueline Howett said, on 3/7/2011 7:01:00 AM

I agree with Angela, that is just one persons opinion. Don'y listen to it...

Oh look! your good angel just turned up on your other shoulder.

MG Higgins said, on 3/7/2011 7:08:00 AM

Thank you for this post. Excellent advice.

Videkov said, on 3/7/2011 7:11:00 AM

Try submitting the manuscript to a couple of RWA (Romance Writers of America) local chapter contests. The local contests are good at providing feedback whereas RWA's national contest only gives a score.

Also, as far as finding an agent goes, Avon publishing tends to publish sweet romances. With a little research you could find agents who represent some of the first-time writers who were recently published in your genre.

A third option is to attend the RWA conference in NYC this June/July. You'll get the opportunity to pitch your manuscript in person and meet quite a few agents. There should be more agents and publishers at a NYC conference since they won't have to travel far (except by taxi).

I strongly recommend the contest route. It is a great way to get specific anonymous feedback.

Good luck!

Lisa Yarde said, on 3/7/2011 7:23:00 AM

Coming out of self-imposed lurkdom to wish you good luck on future submissions. It may sound trite but that's not the right agent for you. It can't be that they're all looking for dark, which doesn't always translates as edgy. As a fellow writer of historical fiction, I feel your pain.

Bish Denham said, on 3/7/2011 7:33:00 AM

Sigh! I think we need more sweet and less sour. Damn the torpedoes and full steam ahead!

Misha said, on 3/7/2011 7:36:00 AM

Well said!

May your dream agent be just around the corner.

:-)

Lenny Lee* said, on 3/7/2011 8:28:00 AM

hi miss becca! loving your story and believing in it is loving your self and believing in your self. for sure you gotta keep trying and youre gonna find just the right agent and then there gonna be sweet stuff all over the book shelfs.
...hugs from lenny

Tabitha said, on 3/7/2011 8:39:00 AM

"if I want to find the right agent and publisher for my story, I have to know who to target. In order to do that, I have to know exactly what kind of book I have. In order to do that, I have to be able to define my story objectively and honestly"

Well said! And SO true.

ralfast said, on 3/7/2011 9:18:00 AM

Perseverance shall triumph, or words to that effect.

I'm going to try using a line from my second book to sell it, just because a) it fits the MC situation like a glove, b) it is a great line, c) I don't know what else to do!

:-/

Here is to hoping.

Mary Vensel White said, on 3/7/2011 9:30:00 AM

You might consider adding a Christian element to it...there's always Amish romance, which is actually a pretty hot market, so I hear. Best of luck with your project. I agree that sometimes it's frustrating to have to label something for the market. Personally, I don't think readers are that exclusive in their tastes, which explains "crossover hits." People will follow a good story, period

Reina said, on 3/7/2011 9:31:00 AM

I've read sweet is making a comeback, so...persist.
I can relate. My Regencies are sweet. No apologies. There are many readers who like that, including me. :) All the best!

Teralyn Rose Pilgrim said, on 3/7/2011 9:31:00 AM

Do you need a beta reader? I'm in the beta stage of my novel, and I'm on the lookout for readers. My book is a historical fiction that takes place in ancient Rome. If you're interested in swapping books, you can contact me at teralynpilgrim @ gmail .com, or you can read more about the book at http://teralynpilgrim.blogspot.com/

Patti said, on 3/7/2011 10:25:00 AM

That is definitely advice that I needed today. BTW - I love sweet stories. If you ask me there's too much angst in the world.

The Writing Runner said, on 3/7/2011 10:31:00 AM

Absolutely! Your book is what it is, and if you're happy with it, you just need to work toward finding an agent who will be THRILLED to see it for what it is! :) Good luck in your search and don't stop trying!

Steph said, on 3/7/2011 11:17:00 AM

Good luck in your search, I know your frustration. I have had several full requests- all come back with the not-so-helpful, "I just didn't love it enough." *sigh*. Although, I am on the opposite end of the spectrum, I refuse to apologize for a MC who is so very NOT sweet. Some people just aren't all that nice, but it's been a struggle... Hang in there, the right agent IS out there!!

Diane said, on 3/7/2011 11:17:00 AM

Hoping you find the right one at just the right time. I like sweet! :O)

Becca Puglisi said, on 3/7/2011 11:19:00 AM

Wow. I almost didn't write this post because I thought it was too specific to my own journey and others wouldn't be able to relate. Again, I say Wow.

Thanks so much for the encouraging words. You all ROCK!

Danyelle said, on 3/7/2011 11:41:00 AM

This is exactly right on. I think it's so easy to get caught up in the wanting of the thing that we forget how *important* it is to find someone who not only wants it, but loves it. *hugs*

Karen Lange said, on 3/7/2011 11:45:00 AM

I agree. You will find a place for it! For the record, I like sweet! :)

Holly Ruggiero said, on 3/7/2011 12:33:00 PM

I like sweet too. It must be frustrating. Great post.

Myne Whitman said, on 3/7/2011 2:36:00 PM

Keep querying, and if you don't have a critique group or beta readers, you may want to get some. All the best.

Lisa Gail Green said, on 3/7/2011 3:30:00 PM

Such a great point! DO write what you love. but also know your market, and where your book fits. Keep querying!!! I'm sure you will find the perfect agent for you!!! It's only a matter of time.

Mary Witzl said, on 3/7/2011 4:01:00 PM

Plenty of sweet things have happened throughout history, and there are bound to be plenty of readers who want to read stories about them. I hope you find the best possible agent for your ms -- one who thinks 'sweet' is romantic and charming, not saccharine and flowery.

Carol Silvis said, on 3/7/2011 4:43:00 PM

Great comments! You are right to write the book you love. Be true to yourself and your writing voice. That's the way to eventually land an agent.

Jan Markley said, on 3/7/2011 5:06:00 PM

You are absolutely right! There is nothing wrong with a sweet story. Not everybody likes vampire stories. There is a market for sweet stories - keep it sweet. ;-j

Tricia J. O'Brien said, on 3/7/2011 5:06:00 PM

I love your advice to embrace your story. I'm doing that with my current project. I have fun writing it, even though it may be a hard sell--a funny fairy tale. We'll see. In the meantime, I love my story and I'm glad you love yours, too.

Trisha said, on 3/7/2011 5:26:00 PM

Have you sent it to betas? What have they said?

Cynthia Chapman Willis said, on 3/7/2011 6:19:00 PM

What a wonderful, heartfelt post. And such great advice. The world needs sweetness. Wishing you the best of luck as you find the right home for your story.

Jacqui said, on 3/7/2011 6:20:00 PM

Ah, sweet misery. I've written nine non-fic books, all published. I am dying to write fiction, so what's my muse send my way: paleohistoric fiction. I had to write it. No one wants it. I so enjoyed writing it.

I feel your pain. Can anyone spell 'self-pub'?

Pk Hrezo said, on 3/8/2011 7:35:00 AM

I know just how you feel. My last 2 mss have been literary contemp and have both been rejected because the pacing wasn't fast enough. But they're not plot-driven stories, they're character driven. Both are 70-80k words, so they're not excessive. It's just the taste of the agents. The stories didn't move fast enough for them. Yet, beta readers loved them. Argh!
I say stay true to yourself and your story and the right agent will come along eventually. If not, there's always self-pubbing!!

Kelly said, on 3/8/2011 8:24:00 AM

My story is realistic humorous so no paranormal twists or wizard battles. Yes, we definitely need to see who wants these kinds of stories.
Good luck to you!

Stina Lindenblatt said, on 3/8/2011 10:59:00 AM

I was happy to see this post because my story is dark and edgy but with hope (the kind of stories I love to read).

But no one can live on a diet of dark and edgy alone. We need the balance. So there'll always be a demand for your kind of stories, Becca. :D

Lemur said, on 3/8/2011 11:25:00 AM

I assume you've already had some writing buddies look at your ms. and give feedback? Since the editors aren't giving you a clue, that may help.

There's nothing wrong with sweet. Actually, now you've got me wanting to read it!

Awesome site, btw. I not only followed, I bookmarked it so I could find your thesauruses.

The CRITTER Project and Naked Without A Pen

Terri Tiffany said, on 3/8/2011 11:28:00 AM

Don't give up. If you believe in this story--it will eventually find a home. Sweet is good--there are a lot of sweet historicals out there:))

Becca Puglisi said, on 3/8/2011 11:39:00 AM

My beta readers have had some general toning and tightening suggestions, but nothing major that could explain why it's not being accepted. Angela (the Magnificent) had some awesome ideas that I incorporated, but still..no agent love. So I really believe it's a matter of finding the right agent.

Thanks again for all the support!

Melody Jackson said, on 3/8/2011 12:05:00 PM

I known this is a little late in the game but: Thank you! :) Thank you so much for this post! I love to write sweet stories! However, I have been discourage when I see what they have out there now and how many agents may not be interested in it.

Kelly H-Y said, on 3/8/2011 4:41:00 PM

You're so right ... no apologies are necessary! Your story will sell once it finds the right home!

Garry G. said, on 3/9/2011 3:33:00 AM

I’ve had a similar thing happen with a short story. I’ve got replies from three editors all of whom said they personally really liked it (plus many more form-rejections), and that it was well written, but couldn’t publish it because it didn’t fit.
Although it is easier to accept rejection for a short story than for a much larger work, it still bites hard when you know something is good but can’t find a home for it because of market trends.

You have my sympathies for your, sweet, problem.

Kelly Hashway said, on 3/9/2011 4:18:00 AM

Good luck in your search. Just a small tip: make sure you don't query agents and editors who have books that are too similar to yours. They don't like their clients to be in competition with each other.

Adventures in Children's Publishing said, on 3/9/2011 4:44:00 AM

Love your attitude and professionalism. I think those close but no feedback rejections are the hardest to deal with, but sometimes they also force us to pick up the manuscript and look at it in a different way. Not an "is it good enough" or "do I love it" kind of way, but an "is there any way at all it could be stronger" way. I recently went through that and after tearing my hair out, I realized that conflict and tension weren't the same thing--and there were places where the story lacked tension. As I went in to revise, I discovered layers I hadn't put on the page. Things I knew about the story and didn't realize I hadn't overtly written. Those ambiguous R's pushed me to examine the story in a way I wouldn't have otherwise, and I am so glad!

What I'm trying to say is that I believe there is a market for everything, but sometimes things happen for a reason, too. This may be the proverbial window opening for you. Maybe there's an opportunity in your manuscript waiting for you, or a new agent who's perfect for you that you wouldn't ordinarily have thought of submitting to. The right thing is coming, just hang in long enough and believe in yourself!

Best,

Martina

tracikenworth said, on 3/9/2011 5:13:00 AM

So sorry about the rejection. They stink!! There are a LOT of dark and edgy books out there but I see the sweet ones getting published to. Maybe look at their dedications and see who agented the writer. Could help you pinpoint things. Good luck with your search!!

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Recently my blogging chum Shannon O'donnell posted about how important certain virtues are for people on the writing path. We must have the courage to write and put ourselves out there, we must find the fortitude needed to persevere. The one virtue she mentioned struggling with is having enough patience to stave off discouragement, depression, frustration and doubt.

Patience. Boy, that is a tough one some days, isn't it? I bet you can all relate to Shannon. I know I can.

Writing is a long journey. Most of you are probably involved in writing sites, forums, critique groups and the like, connecting with others on the writing path. You read blogs, encourage others, keep tabs on those striving just as you are. This is what it means to be a community. But there can be a dark side to belonging to this community, something that can cause us to have a crisis of faith: staying patient and upbeat when other succeed where we have not (yet).

Don't get me wrong, we cheer for every sale and piece of good news that comes to our writer friends! But, sometimes a sliver inside us feels something else: Frustration. Envy. Worry. Doubt. These emotions lead to a plague of questions: Why haven't I succeeded? Why isn't it my turn for good news? Why can't this be me? Am I kidding myself for even trying?

It's very easy to let these negative questions send us on a downward spiral, sucking away our energy, our creativity and our strength to continue. Like Shannon mentioned in her post, it is impatience that leads us down this dark road.

So how do we fight it? How do we build up our resistance and stay upbeat?

I find for me, the best way to conquer impatience is to take it out of the equation. Once my book is in an editor's hands, is there anything I can do writing-wise to make them say yes? No, there isn't. Can I make them read faster, get back to me faster? No. So, why stress and get all impatient about it? These are things I have no control over.

Instead, I put my energy into what I CAN do:

--I can make myself attractive to an editor who may look me up online. So, I put time and energy into my online presence and platform.  

--I can continue to write & polish in case they want to see something else from me. I let go of the book that's on submission and turn to the next project.

--I can continue to learn, which will help me make sure a cleaner product reaches their desk. None of us know everything--we can always improve. Learning is growing.

These are the things within my control, so I do them. :)

Here's one solid fact, no matter where you're at on the publishing trail: if you keep moving forward, you'll get there. I believe this. I live it. So, the next time impatience & negativity clouds your head space, TAKE CONTROL. Fight by putting your energy into things that will lead to your success!

42 Comments on The Fine Art of Conquering Impatience, last added: 2/17/2011

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Andrea Mack said, on 2/14/2011 5:42:00 AM

This is so true, Angela. It's really hard to ignore those impatient feelings, but I think your three strategies are great ones. Just keep writing, just keep writing...

Laura Pauling said, on 2/14/2011 5:43:00 AM

I don't know any writer that hasn't been down that road! And we have to fight giving into the discouragement. I watch a movie, read books and get motivated. I think it's also important to realize that the ups and down are part of the creative process but we don't have to give in to them. Great post, Angela!

Terri Tiffany said, on 2/14/2011 5:53:00 AM

Thank you for this encouraging post. I think it's a great reminder to remember there is always something we can do:)
I'm speaking at a conference in March and plan to talk about your blog and the great way you have broken down details.

Deb said, on 2/14/2011 5:53:00 AM

I like it! Take charge of what we _can_ control and especially like have courage and keep on putting "it" out there. Thanks!

Bish Denham said, on 2/14/2011 5:57:00 AM

Great post Angela. You know about my struggle...your words help.

Kelsey said, on 2/14/2011 6:03:00 AM

I love this post. Love it.

Christine Fonseca said, on 2/14/2011 6:09:00 AM

Such a great post! And focusing on the things we can do instead of stressing over the things we have no control ove...PERFECT!

Angela Felsted said, on 2/14/2011 6:54:00 AM

Great, wise advice.

April said, on 2/14/2011 7:02:00 AM

What a great, encouraging post. Thank you. I needed this, I think. In fact, my husband and I were just talking about this - I related it to writing while he related it to his passion and craft - woodworking. It definitely does us no good to focus on things overwhich we have no control. It's so easy to do, that I can use a daily reminder. Thanks again!

Candyland said, on 2/14/2011 7:11:00 AM

AMEN! Take control! Some of it IS in our hands!

Angela Ackerman said, on 2/14/2011 7:32:00 AM

Looks like this post really struck a cord. We all feel that negativity at some point, no matter where we are or what we've accomplished. I think it's a part of writing, so the trick is breaking out of the cycle as quickly as possible and turn it into fuel to succeed.

Thanks everyone for the comments. You are not alone--remember that!

Angela

Lizzie said, on 2/14/2011 7:39:00 AM

Too true. As much as you want your friends to succeed, you just can't help secretly wishing it was you, when they do achieve something... But the only certain way to never achieve anything is to give up.

Charlie Pulsipher said, on 2/14/2011 7:52:00 AM

Thanks Angela! I really liked the little (yet). That is just as important as patience and focusing on what we can do, that little chunk of hope. Hope is all I am sometimes, small and quiet, clinging to the idea that someday I will publish my words. It keeps me going.
Funny Stuff I Write And Draw

Anonymous said, on 2/14/2011 8:00:00 AM

Good advice Angela! We definetly need to remember that every day.

Shauna (murgatr)

tracikenworth said, on 2/14/2011 8:03:00 AM

I'm just now seeing others I know getting published, getting the perks of fan mail. It helps me to know that they worked hard to get where they're at and I keep reminding myself someday I'll be there. I may not enjoy the same success but then, I started writing with the hope of having one person touched in some small way by my writing. I've done that through my critique group. Now, I want more. It's the little steps that count. Great post!!

KLM said, on 2/14/2011 8:07:00 AM

I have many vices but impatience is the worst.

I try to look at it this way: it's a double-edged sword. On one hand, I drive myself crazy (bad) but on the other hand, impatience is a great mover and shaker in my life. DO IT NOW is not always such a bad approach to writing. After all, writing is eminently put-off-able.

Happy Valentine's Day, Angela!

Cheers,
Kristen

Janet said, on 2/14/2011 8:13:00 AM

What a wonderful post. I totally agree with you. The only way we are not going to succeed is to quit.

Jacqueline Howett said, on 2/14/2011 8:14:00 AM

Great Post Ange! Everyone is on their own path, from birth to death. Its just that old river journey that takes you here and there before you reach your own destiny in the process. Sometimes strange thoughts pop in to test us all, especially through so so so many years, and spirits may even try to trip one up. Don't listen to them - only listen to the good postive stuff. Who needs that. Sometimes it comes in so easily and we get sucked in, especially writers. Yeah, there's one on your left shoulder and another on your right from time to time. Now who are you going to listen to? Make sure you hear: Dont listen to them.

and I quote your words:Fight by putting your energy into things that will lead to your success!

Shallee said, on 2/14/2011 9:11:00 AM

I love the idea of conquering impatience by focusing on the things you can control. We all definitely get impatient, but this is a very helpful cure for it!

Susan R. Mills said, on 2/14/2011 9:22:00 AM

I totally relate to those feelings of joy mixed with a little bit of envy and frustration. Patience is the hardest thing to maintain on this journey for me.

Shannon O'Donnell said, on 2/14/2011 11:04:00 AM

Wow. Thanks, Angela. You are 100% right about focusing on the things we CAN do. It really did help me when I was finally able to turn my thoughts to a new project. And diving into writing books (I bought Save the Cat! and The Fire Within) motivated me as well. Great post. Thanks for always being here.

kathrynjankowski said, on 2/14/2011 2:56:00 PM

Great positive affirmations!

Kelly said, on 2/14/2011 3:00:00 PM

I love the list of Can-do things! I'm taking a webinar this month and also might take a poetry class to keep learning.
Like GnR says, "All we need is just a little patience
Said, sugar, make it slow
And we come together fine
All we need is just a little patience" :)

Becca Puglisi said, on 2/14/2011 4:34:00 PM

This is such great advice for so many areas of life. There are always situations where we seem to be not doing as well as someone else, or not progressing as fast as we want. Focusing on the negative is never good and is always a choice. Thanks for the reminder!

Me said, on 2/14/2011 6:14:00 PM

Thanks for writing the exact words that I needed to read today. I'll consider it a sign from the universe, and carry on instead of giving up...
-C

Kelly Hashway said, on 2/14/2011 6:18:00 PM

Excellent post! I love your advice. It's so easy to get caught up in what we can't control. We have to focus on what we can do. I think I'm going to have to bookmark this so I can reread it the next time I'm stressing out about something that's out of my hands. Thanks!

Leslie Rose said, on 2/14/2011 7:19:00 PM

This post is so true! I gave up acting years ago because I wasn't patient and didn't deal well with the endless auditions and rejections. Luckily those days helped me start to grow the thick skin you need to hang in there with writing. Never give up if you love it!

Marion Sipe said, on 2/14/2011 7:21:00 PM

Great post!

Personally, I'm a planner. I lay out a plan to goal, follow it and expect to get where I set out to go. For me, the key to overcoming impatience (as much as I have :D ) has been accepting that it's not something I have any control over. I can't lay out a neat little plan that will absolutely end with me being published. And it was all those years of intensive planning that led to more and more frustration on my part.

All I can do is write, crit, edit and submit. The rest isn't in my hands.

Carrie said, on 2/14/2011 9:56:00 PM

Awesome post and great advice! It's important to work on what we CAN control in all areas of life.

Stina Lindenblatt said, on 2/15/2011 4:23:00 AM

I love this post!

I haven't had those 'why not me?' feelings yet. I'm still excited about my friends' successes, no matter where they are on the writing pathway. Even when one of my friends has the best title, cover, author blurb, ever, I still get excited. If I'm green, then it's a beautiful shade of green. But that's because I know how hard she worked to get there. You can't be jealous of that. You can only admire them and hope to do the same, which includes all the points you mentioned, Angela.

Angela Ackerman said, on 2/15/2011 8:40:00 AM

Lizzie, Janet and Charlie, you guys have the right attitude!

Shauna, absolutely this can be applied to all aspects and goals. Hugs!

Traci, that's absolutely an excellent point--everyone who succeeds works very hard to do so. I know very few people in this likfe that have things handed to them with no effort.

KLM, yes, procrastination can be a mortal enemy can't it?

Jac, this is so true. As writers we do feel pulled in different direction, and this is when doubt can set in. It helps to remember why we started this journey in the first place--each and every one of us started because we believed we could do it. We should never lose sight of that. :)

Shallee, exactly!

Susan, I think it's something so many struggle with, but few want to talk about because it makes us feel bad, like we're not nice people. This isn't true at all! Doubt and envy are powerful, and it helps to talk about it as we all feel them at some point.

Shannon, I am trying to get my hands on Save The Cat! I so want to read it!

Kelly, that's great! Improving on what we know about writing is one of the smartest things we can do. Always learn, always improve.


Thanks Kathryn!

Becca, how many times have you been there for me to pump me up when I'm down? LOL, guess where I learned this from?

Me, absolutely you keep going. Don't give up. I know so many great writers who gave up, and it steals a piece of me every time, because I know good writing, and they had the talent to succeed. You believed in yourself enough to start, now keep believing it! You can do it!

Kelly, I think it's because there is so much about this industry we can't control--so many things that keep the glass ceiling in place. It's easy to fixate on it, but what we really need to do is let go of it all and concentrate on breaking through the glass using the tools we have.

Leslie, I'm glad the past made you stronger. Everyone should chase their dreams and only change focus when they themselves feel it's time and they can do it without regret.

Marion, you got it!

Carrie, thanks for commenting!

Stina, you are one of the most put together and focused writers I know. You have drive and determination, and when you know there's an area you need to work on, you don't hesitate to act. You are the embodiment of hard work and taking control!

Again everyone, thanks for the great comments. I really do believe this is something that we should be able to discuss without judgment. We're all in the same boat, all headed for the same desitnation, and there will be storms on the way. Sharing your experiences is such a help to me and my journey.

Angela

Lisa Gail Green said, on 2/15/2011 8:49:00 AM

This is such an important point. It can't be said enough. And we all have moments of weakness when we start to slip... but then when we remind ourselves of WHY we're doing it in the first place and how we can continue to work we recover and stay on track.

Pk Hrezo said, on 2/15/2011 9:05:00 AM

I really needed to read this today. i was feeling exactly the way you mentioned. And it is impatience. I have to remind myself, no matter how hard I work, It's just not my time.

Thanks for posting this.

Kelly Andrews said, on 2/15/2011 9:15:00 AM

Good post, Angela. I try to remind myself that takes just as long to hear back whether you are patient or impatient.

Kris Kaumeyer said, on 2/15/2011 9:44:00 AM

My impatience monster gets a hold of me all the time. It's a constant battle, but I tell myself to back off and slow down. You have to do the work before you can get the results. The journey is half the adventure... so I'm to believe.

The All Real Numbers Symbol said, on 2/15/2011 3:59:00 PM

Good post. I have trouble mostly with the patience neede to get work done. I don't have ADD, but sometimes I feel like I do, given how often I switch from one project to the other. But I've also heard it said that sometime's it's good to have more than one project going, so if you get bored on the one, go to something better, and come back when you feel ready to keep working on the first one. Make of that what you will.

Brent Wescott said, on 2/15/2011 7:10:00 PM

What a great resource you've created. I feel like I finally began my journey as a writer this year after feeling impatient about it literally for years. I'm taking steps I should have taken a long time ago. Your post here describes exactly what I'm going through. Thanks for your list of "I cans."
It Just Got Interesting

Cynthia Chapman Willis said, on 2/16/2011 10:29:00 AM

Love this honest and uplifting post! So true! I don't think the impatience every goes away. It just takes on different forms at different times. Wonderful words of wisdom here. Thank you!!!

Heather said, on 2/16/2011 1:12:00 PM

"Keep moving forward and put your energy into what you can do," Thank you for that golden advice! Words to live by!

Kittie Howard said, on 2/16/2011 1:35:00 PM

LOVE this post! We're so into writing that we want to get it out there, now, all very frustrating when it's not, even worse, rejected. Writing is not for the faint of heart.

Conda V. Douglas said, on 2/16/2011 4:49:00 PM

Excellent post! And I so needed it today (and lots of other days too).

Kerri Cuev said, on 2/16/2011 5:34:00 PM

Great post! Keep moving forward--I LIKE it!

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By: Kristi Holl, on 2/11/2011
Blog: Writers First Aid (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
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