As of tonight, my Facebook account is gone. Permanently. The short version of why I left: As I said on my final wall post, I will miss the people I really connected with there, but I will not miss the experience of using Facebook. I just don’t like it. Also, it’s a huge time-suck. For the long version, read on:
I should start by saying why I joined FB. At the 2009 SCBWI conference in LA, an editor suggested that FB and Twitter were good resources and ways to connect for kidlit people. When I got home, I joined both FB and Twitter just to check them out, assuring myself that I could quit if I wanted to. I immediately liked Twitter and hated Facebook, but decided to give it a chance in case I changed my mind.
Shortly after I joined, something strange happened. People I didn’t know and had never heard of started sending me friend requests. I wondered, “Who are these people and why do they want to be friends with me?” But they were friends with all my other friends, so I decided on an open friending policy (I friended everyone that asked).
The longer this went on, the more cynical I became. The more friends I had on Facebook, the lonelier I felt. Probably because I didn’t know most of my so called friends.
It wasn’t all bad. It was great to connect with real friends and kidlit people on FB. It was also really fun to get a hundred or more, “Happy Birthday!” messages posted to my wall on my bday (it took me a while to figure out how they all knew it was my bday).
I’ll admit that I never really learned how to use FB (like not looking at the users manual when you buy something). I thought at first that it was like Twitter (it’s not) and that it was, “plug and play” (it wasn’t, there was a lot to learn). The worst part is that I didn’t realize that by friending everyone, I was putting my real friends at risk. Most people on FB are nice, honest people, but some aren’t. A friend of mine let me in on the fact that you had to be careful of who you connected to on FB, because they had access to all your friends and their info. If that wasn’t bad enough, FB kept changing things like privacy settings, which allowed people to see your personal info even if you didn’t want them to!
I almost quit several times, but FB kept sucking me back in. There were a few friends that I only talked with on FB and I didn’t want to lose touch again.
But looking at the news stream felt like drowning. There were all these people (many that I didn’t know) talking about all these other people I didn’t know. And they were playing games and sending me requests and asking me to join their book pages and, and, and … and I was going crazy, and not writing or drawing as much. Someone told me how to turn off all the game stuff, which helped, but Facebook was still a stressful place to be. And I still hated using it. Every time I figured out where everything was and how it worked, FB updated things so we all had to start all over again.
I almost quit again at the beginning of the year. Then I had a brilliant thought. I could make FB pages to keep my personal life personal! I could unfriend all the people I didn’t actually know! This gave me hope for a nanosecond. Then I found out that it’s a horrible feeling to unfriend people, even if you don’t know them, and that it felt bad to ignore new friend requests from unknown people. Also, not many people liked my new pages, which made me feel stupid for making them in the first place, so I tried to share the posts on my wall and tweet about them, which felt like screaming, “look at me, look at my FB page.”
It took a while to realize that I didn’t care/wasn’t offended if people didn’t look at my Facebook pages or read my wall or comment. Most of them were probably drowning in their own crowded news streams. The
All the snow this winter has turned the snowmen into zombies!
The remaining snowmen are running for their lives!
The prompt this week for Illustration Friday is “Layer.” Whenever I watch waves, I think of them as having layers of colors. The colors of the waves crash into the colors of the water, blending the layers into one, until the next wave rolls in.
I wish I were at the beach right now! At least the sun is shining today
The laundry room caught on fire (again) today. The smoke billowed up through the building and into our apartment, so I’m out on the balcony listening to the construction and the jackhammers. They’ve told us not to leave, but the firemen left, so I’m thinking of leaving as well. The last time this happened was October 1, 2008. I blogged about it then and that post could have been written today:
Post from October 1, 2008 on the old sruble blog
How’s life at the Inferno Apartment Complex on Incendiary Lane? Glad you asked. Earlier today, I smelled smoke. I tried to find the cause of said smoke, but couldn’t. A few minutes later, a thick heavy smoke smell filled the room (and I couldn’t breathe, which was very disconcerting). It also seemed a little hazy. I did the smoke check again and discovered that there was smoke wafting in from the hallway (I did NOT open the door, as I am not addle-brained).
While throwing on jeans (no need to go outside in my Halloween themed PJ pants I wear sometimes while being creative), I made a mental list of things I needed to do if there was a fire: encourage LeFurrball to get into his carrier without too much of a fight (ha ha), put on shoes, grab the Remus kitty, car keys, laptop, ID, money … FLEE! (Note: If there were flames or more smoke, I would have grabbed the cat and bolted.)
Before enacting my fire-fleeing list, I called down to the concierges to see if they could elaborate on the disaster that was surely happening, or not. He said that someone’s clothes caught on fire in the dryer!
Our apartment is nowhere near the first floor, where the laundry room is; the smoke came up through the elevator shafts and the vents in our apartment. Our apartment is not smoky anymore because the windows are open and the vents and bottom of the door are blocked off, but the hallways, elevators, lobby, and laundry room are evil smelling. I feel bad for the people with burned clothes.
The fact that someone’s clothing started a fire in the dryer didn’t surprise me. A few months ago, I noticed that clothing coming out of the dryer was so hot, that you would get burned if you touched it (fabric, not just metal zippers). We’ve been drying our clothes on medium or low since then. Dryer fires are scary and charred clothing is not fashionable.
I hope this isn’t a pattern, but just in case, remind me to look out for laundry fires again in 2012. I really wish I would have done laundry yesterday! Argh!
p.s. Unfortunately, I can’t find the pictures from last time. I haven’t been downstairs yet, but I’m guessing it looks similar. Imagine an industrial sized dryer with burn marks that looks a bit like a melted marshmallow, if you only held the marshmallow up to the campfire on one side.
For the 3 of you reading this who haven't expired from sheer boredom, following this thread, I have actual finished art to show.
Today I shifted into 'just get it done' mode. I was up at dawn, coloring away, and am happy to report that I now have 10 of the 30 pieces completely finished. Yay!
I had to remind myself that this is not art for a gallery, or for a CPSA entry; its art for an educational publishing book for little little kids. With a deadline and fee to match.
Not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm just saying. Its tempting with my colored pencil work to linger over every stroke, and for something like this, I just can't.
So I got my rear in gear yesterday and today and started finishing things up.
10 down, 20 to go (although they're actually all halfway done, thankfully).
~~~~~~
Other thoughts:
FLIES. Its getting hot now, so the flies are out in force. Yuk. Who invented flies, and why?
GAY MARRIAGE. But not in California, oh no, that would be too civilized. I want to rant about this in about 120,000 point type, but can't, so won't, and be glad.
CATS CATCHING BIRDIES. Sad. Although I have to say, the squawking, dive-bombing blackbird that made all of us miserable for weeks was asking for it. He is now RIP in my yard.
MUD PIE ICE CREAM. I think it has LSD in it. Its good stuff. Weird dreams though, man.
DENNIS HOPPER. A guy who looks just like him is moving into the house across the street from me. And no, its not the ice cream talking ~ he really does. If I see a Peter Fonda drive up, then I'll start to wonder...
Back to scanning art ~
The United States Library of Congress hosted its first National Book Festival in 2001. Thirty thousand people attended. On September 29, 2007, the date of the seventh edition of the festival, attendance exceeded one hundred twenty thousand.
In addition to the use of online tools and digital media, including podcasts, the National Book Festival is just one of many of the Library of Congress’ initiatives to promote literacy and a love of reading and writing.
On this edition of Just One More Book, Mark is joined by Matt Raymond, Director of Communications for the Library of Congress, to talk about the National Book Festival, the online Young Readers’ Toolkit, and the use of new media to promote literacy.
Links:
National Book Festival poster image from the Library of Congress website.
Tags:
blogs,
childrens literacy,
Library of Congress,
Matt Raymond,
National Book Festival,
podcastsblogs,
childrens literacy,
Library of Congress,
Matt Raymond,
National Book Festival,
podcasts
Amen! Good for you, Stephanie! I’ve wanted to quit FB a number of times too, but never have. I don’t have as many friends (and strangers!) as it sounds like you did, but I don’t get much out of it. And you’re right, it IS complicated to figure out, whereas Twitter seems much simpler to me. I may quit someday, but for now I just spend a minimal amount of time there making sure nothing blows up while I’m gone. Perhaps I’m too nosy to quit entirely? =)
I’m very new to Facebook and I’m feeling the same anxieties you did, Stephanie. I love Twitter though. Will I keep FB? Jury is still out. But your post made me feel better about knowing I can always walk away.
I appreciate the fact that you admit you didn’t learn all the ins and outs. There is a learning curve, definitely; I like Facebook enough that I’ve taken time to figure out to set everything the way I like it. But if you don’t like it, why bother?
I completely understand the urge to friend everybody; I used to friend anyone in the writing community, but now I only accept requests from people I’ve met in person or with whom I’ve had some decent amount of email/online contact. I also deleted all the people who never interact with me at all.
I think of Facebook as an interactive address book. Some people I speak with all the time; some, I just like having their contact info so I can get in touch if I need to.
I found myself nodding at everything you said here. I have alot of the same issues with Facebook and have quit once already. The news stream is completely overwhelming! But I feel just as daunted by Twitter and I keep thinking (though maybe it’s not true) that I should be either at one or the other (lots of people even seem to be at both but I have no idea how they keep up!). But I’m going to give switching (or maybe just stopping) some serious thought.
I’m right there with ya! I quit FB well over a year ago, for many of the reasons you stated. The only difference is that I did know the “ins and outs” of the thing, but I was losing precious time dealing with other stuff about facebook that I was allowing to suck me away from the more important things I needed to do.
And yes, I prefer Twitter over FB! 140 characters is the bomb! (I just dated myself there, didn’t I?)
Good for you, Stephanie, for doing what you needed to do. And enjoy all those minutes and hours you have now recovered!
Hi Stephanie, it’s your cousin in-law, Josh. I am kind-of sad that you left Facebook, as I thought it was a decent way to keep in touch with you and Doug. I got to know you a little bit more as well, which is good because I only met you once (can’t believe it’s been almost 10 years since then, where does the time go?). As you can probably tell, family is important to me.
I do understand why you left though. Facebook is far from perfect and I have several issues with it myself. Considering your understandable issues with it, you definitely did the right thing by leaving, especially given the fact that Facebook can waste so much of a person’s time.
Also, please say hi for me to Doug, Aunt Sara, and Uncle Fred when you get the chance. Thanks!
I’m still with Facebook but I keep my friends number down to 31. These are family and people I used to work with. Some friends I hid because of all the ridiculous game notices that filled my wall. I make sure to check their walls now and then so I don’t miss anything important. As far as socializing beyond that, I don’t think I’ll ever do that. And if I publish a novel, I can make a FB page just for it!
Anne M. Leone – I know what you mean about that feeling that something will blow up if you don’t manage facebook. Good luck keeping the bombs at bay.
Nelsa – Glad that my post helped you feel like you can leave if you want to (and sorry I friended you and then ran). I’ll see you on Twitter!
Anne Marie – It’s great that you’ve found a way to use facebook that works for you and were able to revise your friending policy too. It also sounds like it would be good as an interactive address book. p.s. I did eventually figure out a few things on FB. Unfortunately, they were the things that always seemed to change with updates and new formats.
C.K. – There are a lot of people that do both and seem to manage it. I don’t know how they do it either, although I was able to balance a little when I set certain days or times for FB and checked in for quick visits on Twitter. My problem is always that it’s too easy for me to get sucked in and then a whole day is gone. Let me know if you have any questions or need help with Twitter if you decide to join.
Donna – Yay you for quitting FB! Thanks for letting me know I’m not the only one. “140 characters is the bomb!” <—True, that!
Joshua – Can't believe it was 10 yrs ago that we met. Time flies, especially when you see people on FB in the mean time. I'll say hi to everyone for you.
Catherine – That's so smart to keep your list at a manageable level. It sounds like you've got the right idea.
Wow, Stephanie! I think you might have inspired me to quit Facebook too. It DOES cause a lot of drama, and maybe I don’t want everyone knowing my personal business. *must think on this*
Great post.
Jen, good luck with your decision, whether you stay on FB or leave!