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Today’s post was first published in Mamalode on October 8th and promoted on Twitter by Brain,Child Magazine.  It was an interesting – and somewhat controversial -  topic that I asked Jennifer if I could feature it here.  We’d both welcome your feedback.

Dear Bubbe,
I never intended to do it; really. One second it was a quivering icon, the next it was gone. Just. Like. Magic.

Honestly, it brought on a smile. I’m not trying to be mean. Chalk it up to a Mommy epiphany, a moment of clarity. The day I deleted Minecraft, I liberated myself and you of a virtual, addictive burden. Pressing that shaky, little X ushered you back to real life. That made me happy.

In the beginning, I was a fan.
Compared to the other choices the video game world has to offer, I could see why you wanted to tap the piggy bank to invest in one that requires players to scavenge for resources, earn survival treasure, design landscapes, construct villages, and defend against intruders. As a lifelong rock collector, forager of sorts, visual thinker, and creative designer it appealed to many of your natural sensibilities.

A popular topic of discussion at summer camp and later in the school cafeteria, Minecraft was also something to bond over with friends. Game play and conversations led to art projects, dissecting handbooks, sharing song parodies, and pretend play. It was a vehicle to stretch your imagination, apply ingenuity, problem solve, and socialize. So like organized sports, enrichment programs, and play dates, this Mommy approved video game quickly became outsourcing I could justify.

Not only did I feel like I was doing right by your development; it kept you busy, safe, in an earshot and out of my hair all at the same time. My afternoon was still my own and I didn’t necessarily have to entertain or engage with you all that much.
Then I began to notice screen time and giving up the screen made you cranky and angry. You responded less to Dad and me, ignored guests, and blew off friends playing outside. Preferred downtime was spent in the basement; alone in a Minecraft cave.
Even with the game shut off, I was living with a one note Bubbe on Enderman autopilot. It was all you wanted to talk, draw, write, and think about. And when The Skootch got access, twice the misery ensued.      

So in an effort to find balance, we set up a schedule to earn and limit play time.

It didn’t work.

The timer chime was drowned out daily by your pleading, sometimes screaming voice, “I wasn’t done; I just found iron, I need a diamond sword, a creeper destroyed my supplies and all I have left is a raw chicken!”
It was only after the drama escalated to the point where I found myself ripping the IPad from your grip and yelling back, “Who cares; it’s not real!” that I knew we needed a big change.
All craziness combined led me to Deletion Day.

In the future, I’m not ruling out screen time completely; that would make me a hypocrite but Minecraft was sucking wind from your childhood and it needed to go away.
Proof of my decision came the morning after Deletion Day when I read an article about Steve Jobs; the man who invented the tablet on which you play. He was brilliant for many reasons, particularly in his choice to limit his own children’s access to technology.
A few hours later, you played with months old Minecraft Legos for the first time and said, “Mom, this is fun. I never would have known if I kept playing video games.” I then knew we were heading in a better direction.
Your Lego comment got me thinking more about fun and parent approved outsourcing, both today and when I was your age.

Like you, I kept busy after school and like you, my mother gravitated toward outsourcing. She didn’t have insight into child development or the value of play, I’m just pretty sure that when she came home from work, she didn’t want to see my face until dinner.
But I didn’t play video games, do gobs of after school activities, or have scheduled dates to see friends.
I was let out of the house and off the leash; in an earshot of only the person on the bike next to me and left in an unstructured and by modern standards, unsafe environment to play pickup games with neighboring kids, defend myself against obnoxious villagers, explore the nearby pond, collect crystals from a stream, build forts, and roam through the woods.
Call it my own, private Minecraft. No IPad needed.
And it was good fun.

Growing up isn’t easy but parenting isn’t simple. You can’t always get what you want when you want it, and I can’t always do what makes my life easier. In an effort to raise you to be a thinking, well adjusted, connected, kind, happy, independent human being I sometimes have to check myself and then love you enough to say enough.
Your childhood is just out of my reach, but it is not yet out of yours. Embrace. Enjoy. Experience. Take time in the real world to discover unchartered lands, dig caves, build cities, mix it up with the villagers, and have adventures. You’ll be glad you did.

Now go. I’ll see you at dinner.            
I Love You,
Mom

Jennifer can be reached at: http://www.redsaidwhat.com
Twitter: @redsaidwhatblog
Facebook page: Red said what?

On Monday I featured some new iPhone Apps for kids.  Today I have three free ones to download onto you Android device.

1. HAY DAY: A building game in a happy country town filled with positive, colorful things and lots of fun for young kids.

2. KIDS DOODLE – COLOR AND DRAW: Your kids will love this drawing app thanks to its colorful options and ability to play back their drawings in a video montage.

3. BUBBLE POPPING FOR BABIES: A very simple game for your baby or toddler. Various forms of ocean life trapped in bubbles are released when baby touches them.  Great for building eye-hand co-ordination.

What are your kids’ favorite Apps?

Whether you’re planning a fall road trip or have a long wait at the doctor or dentist, you can keep your children busy with these new FREE apps to download onto your APPLE iPhone.

1. MY HORSE: If you don’t have room in your apt. or backyard for a real horse, get your child a virtual one to love and care for.

2. SPONGE BOB DINER DASH: This game allows the player to help serve customers at the Krusty Krab and make sure they all have a good time.

3. MY LITTLE PONY – FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC:  Help My Little Pony and friends rebuild the town to restore it to sparkling magic.

4. PBS KIDS VIDEO: Numerous PBS apps feature a large inventory of video clips from popular TV shows.  For multiple age groups.

Tune in on Friday for more free apps for ANDROID devices.

Micheals Craft Stores are offering the PASSPORT TO IMAGINATION crafts program for kids 5 and up.  Children can explore all seven continents and learn about their landmarks.  The program runs from June 17 through August 2 and costs [email protected] per session.  For details go to: http://www.micheals.com

While summer should be fun-filled and relaxing, some children get bored or lose skills when they are out of school.  Others just do better when there is some structure to the day. If you and your family are looking for FREE summer enrichment for kids, check out these websites:

http://www.ixl.com   is an interactive math site containing more than 7 million activities and quizzes created by math teachers.  There are problems from Pre-K through high school geometry and algebra.

http://www.funbrain.com   was created fro children from preschool through grade eight.  It offers more than 100 interactive games fro math, reading and literacy.  There are also popular books and comics to read on the site, including “Diary of a Wimpy Kid”, “Amelia Writes Again” and “Brewster Rocket”.

http://www.openculture.com  contains high-quality cultural and educational media from all over the world.  Children can find free online classes on topics such as English Literature, biology, math and film.

So while you’re having summer fun, check out some fun-filled learning activities as well.

I just discovered some very cool word games at Merriam-Webster's Word Central. The games are specifically designed for kids with fun sounds and cool graphics.

In Alpha-Bot, a robot challenges you to a spelling contest.

In Robo-Bee, a bee sends you flying after just the right word--synonyms, antonyms, and more.

Bigbot involves hand-eye coordination as well as a good command of vocabulary, as you try to feed the ravenous robot.

And finally, my favorite game--JUMBLE KIDS. I tried to do my own version on July 27.
You'll love the Merriam-Webster version. You earn puzzle points and play against the clock.
Don't wait to explore the possibilities...

Hey, I had a really nice thank you note today from a mom who bought a copy of DOGGIE DAY CAMP. When she shared it with her stepson, who was struggling a bit recognizing adverbs, Bubba's story seemed to flip the adverbial light on for him.

HIGHLIGHTS has a "click and play" Hidden Pictures interactive game just in time for Valentine's Day. See if you can find all the hidden pictures and make the illustration transform into bright colors--"Making Valentines."

HAPPY ST. PAT'S DAY!

This site provides fun online games for you to try: POP CAP GAMES. You can download them or play them online.

This Saturday libraries across the United States are sponsoring a NATIONAL GAMING DAY.  Of course, we all know how much fun it can be to visit a library on a regular day--with all the books, magazines, computers, videos.  Not to mention story times, book talks, and special programs.

Harry Potter in the News (surprise surprise!)...

Today I discovered a couple of interesting Potter pieces in the media. First The New York Times ran a piece saying the claim that reading the Harry Potter books helps turn kids into book lovers is overblown (which, if it's true, is unfortunate).

A Publishers Weekly article reveals that the Nielsen people have come up with a report offering all sorts of Potter-related statistics on books sales and movie sales, what they call The Potter Effect. Here are a few choice stats:

• Scholastic has spent from $300,000-plus to $900,000-plus on promotion for the various Harry Potter titles with a total of $3.6 million spent on U.S. promotion for all Potter-related books.
• 27.7 million copies of Harry Potter books have been sold in the U.S. since 2001.
  
• 51% of people in the U.S. are aware there's a new Harry Potter book coming out. (Do the the other 49% live under rocks or in biospheres or something? How do they not know?)
• 28% of people in the U.S. over the age of 12 have read at least one of the books. I am not among them--I've not read any of them.
  

Made it through JOSEPH for the second time today, and have an additional whole page of edits... simple things like a missing word and and extra words, etc. Now I will wait until I get it home, print it out and go through it one more time. Sometimes I think it is easier to read the hard copy than to read things on the computer.

Working on a little marketing, too. I sent a couple of brochures to Matthew's teacher, and she seemed really excited about the books, saying they were really needed to make people more aware of autism. She thinks they need to be in classrooms and libraries...figured she knows the people around here, so sent her a whole bunch of the brochures to share with all those people she thinks need the books. Not all that many, in the overall scheme of things, but if I find enough enthusiastic people to share their thoughts about the books, it can only help get them out to where they will do some good.

Quiet day today, for the most part...took the kids to WalMart after we went out to dinner, to spend some of their own money, and miracle of miracles...WalMart HAD the computer game that Matthew has been obsessing about for the last three days. Jay was happy to find the one he wanted too, so things were REALLY quiet when we returned.

Golf was good today, in that it was good weather (not too hot) and the course was nice. A little different than most courses in Florida...it looked more like a ski field filled with hills and lots of moguls...not very many flat places at all. Scored poorly on the front, but at my handicap on the back