What Was She Thinking: Notes on a Scandal by Zoe Heller made me feel alone. I related a bit too much to the narrator, Barbara. I saw myself in her in 30 years when I'm still single and have only a small number of close friends. In some ways it was refreshing having someone talk about how things really are for everyone, married and single people alike. Both envy the life of the other. Both make mistakes and errors in judgment.
The book addresses the subject of love on numerous occasions and I am delighted in the fashion it was mentioned. Sheba swears undying love for her student while still having love for her husband. But, the author shrewdy implies the student was just acting out of lust instead of love when he pursued his teacher. His nonchalance about the whole relationship showed his indifference toward his lover. It pains me when Sheba does not realize how much Connolly (her student) does not care about her. She is just a passing fad in a young boy's life, a boy who is only starting to make the shift to manhood.
What Was She Thinking lives up to its name. Throughout the entire unfolding of the story, I couldn't help but think, "what was she thinking" for Barbara as well as Sheba. I recommend this book to readers who don't mind seeing life as it is. Just promise me you won't delusion yourself the way the characters have if you find yourself in a similar situation. It was painful watching Sheba destroy herself while believing she was doing it for true love even though it was clear her lover was no longer interested.
