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This is an excerpt from Write Your Way Out of the Rat Race…And Step Into a Career You Love, which is Pay What It’s Worth (meaning YOU choose what to pay) in the Renegade Writer Store.

I just did a rough count, and what I have to tell you isn’t pretty:

Between 1996 and 2015 I sent out over 200 magazine queries — each one to multiple publications — and sold somewhere around 60 ideas. That’s a 30% success rate — or a 70% rejection rate. If I sent each query to four magazines, that means I received 480 rejections. (And that’s not even counting the untold number of informal ideas I sent to my editors via email once I became more established that were rejected, or the letters of introduction I sent to trade magazine editors that went nowhere.)

So how was it that I’ve been able to write for around 150 magazines, with most of them giving me multiple assignments over the years? Top magazines like Redbook, Health, USA Weekend, Parenting, and Writer’s Digest? How was I able to make a living—a good living—mainly writing for magazines?

It’s because I was too stubborn to give up.

Even when I was failing most of the time, I kept pitching. And every time I made a sale, I wowed the editor so she would give me more work.

So how can you get over the idea of rejection? Here’s the thing:

Rejection isn’t about you.

If your idea or writing are rejected by a prospect or editor, it’s a simple business decision: Your offering was not right for the prospect at this time.

When you’re approached by a salesperson at the supermarket asking if you want to sample a new brand of pita chips and you say No thanks, does that mean the salesperson personally sucks? Is it a judgment call on the actual person handing out the chips? Or even on the quality of the product? No. Your rejection of the offer means you’re full because you just had lunch, or you can’t eat gluten, or you’re not in the mood for a snack, or you’re a vegan and the chips have cheese powder on them.

The product doesn’t suck, and neither does the salesperson. It has nothing to do with them.

It’s the same with writing. If a prospect says no, it can mean anything from “We don’t need a freelance writer right now” to “I had a fight with my spouse this morning and I’m in a foul mood.”

If you let the mere thought of rejection keep you from writing, then you’ve already failed. You’ve pre-rejected yourself!

[TWEET THIS]

The best thing you can do when you’re starting your career as a writer is to develop a thick skin to rejection. The good news is that the more you pitch, the more immune to rejection you become. Sounds counterintuitive, but it’s true: When you have one magazine query out there, it’s your baby and a rejection can crush you. When you have 50 magazine queries and LOIs out there, a rejection on one of them means you still have 49 more chances.

Now…get out there and pitch today.

This post originally ran in August 2013, and I updated it to make it more useful to you.

This post is by Deb Mitchell.

I’m definitely more of a “rules are there for a reason” than a “rules were meant to be broken” kind of girl. It just never occurs to me to buck the system, and frankly, that’s served me well all my life.

But when my freelance writing career stalled (despite the fact that I had 5+ years of experience with clips numbering in the triple digits), even playing by the rules top freelance writing experts teach wasn’t getting me anywhere.

“Send pitches to newsstand pubs and LOIs to trade pubs.” Check.

“Email editors – NEVER call them!” Check.

“DO NOT clog an editor’s inbox by attaching your clips.” Check.

“Whatever you do, take time to research each market and NEVER, EVER use a template email.” Check, check.

I was spending loads of time researching markets, ferreting out the appropriate editors’ contact info and meticulously wordsmith-ing every email from scratch. Despite my best rule-following efforts, none of the editors contacted me back. Not. One.

There simply aren’t words to describe how frustrated and discouraged I felt. Giving so much time and effort with nothing to show for it eventually took its toll. On a daily basis I was at best, fighting despair and at worst, sinking in its depths.

In the midst of all this, I started working with a writing mentor (the one-and-only Linda). She calmed me down and gave me a few pieces of advice which I, of course, followed to the letter. I got a few lukewarm responses from editors as a result, and I even sold an article to a new-to-me (but not great paying) market.

Sure, it was progress, which lifted my spirits to a degree. But let’s face it — I was still working long, hard hours for minimal payoff. NOT a sustainable pattern for any small business.

Then Linda gave me a tip that helped me think outside the box – and believe me, it was one I NEVER expected to hear from her or any freelance writing expert.

“Why not try calling some editors?” she said, “And write a great LOI email you can quickly tweak for each market. Ask if they assign to freelancers or if they prefer pitches.”

Um, excuse me, what did you say?? Call editors?? Write one LOI to reuse over and over?? Pitch to trade pubs?? Break rules?!?!

As if that weren’t enough, Linda challenged me to call 25 editors in one day.

The thought of doing things that are widely considered no-no’s freaked me out enough, but seriously, 25?! Believe it or not, the part that scared me the least was the actual cold calling. I have a background in sales and I’m good at talking to people and I like marketing myself. Maybe, just maybe, the reason my by-the-book efforts were flopping was because my approach felt inauthentic. Calling editors seemed much more “me” — I’d just always thought if I did it, they’d view me as unprofessional (and kind of hate my guts for bugging them).

But with Linda, a seasoned pro writer, saying it was OK, I didn’t hesitate.

Armed with a three sentence script Linda wrote for me and a short and sweet LOI template email, I started the challenge.

I didn’t even get to leave voicemails with five editors before my phone rang.

“Deb, I was just delighted to get your message!” Really and truly, an editor was calling me to tell me she was happy I’d called her — not “hacked off” or “appalled” or even just “annoyed.” It seems she’d heard my voicemail right after leaving an editorial meeting where she’d learned an article slated for the next issue had fallen through. I’d also thrown caution to the wind and sent her my LOI email with my resume and a clip attached. She’d seen something in my article that would make a perfect story to fill that empty spot. Could I get something into her within a couple of weeks?

I know, right?!?!

After all my nose-to-the-grindstone work and months of angst over doing things the “right” way, all it took was literally a couple of phone calls and I had a gig that paid more than triple what I’d been getting! Even better, the editor ended our conversation by saying this was “the start of a very beautiful working relationship.” Hello, future high-paying gigs!

I’m no expert when it comes to freelancing, but I do think there’s something to this whole “find what feels right for you” idea. Just because the freelance writing books and classes say “Do this” or “Don’t do that” doesn’t necessarily mean those rules are hard and fast. It took me having someone of Linda’s caliber giving me permission to break the rules for me to do something that in the end felt natural and comfortable for me. And it worked.

As long as your approach allows you to both be yourself and to “sell” yourself as a competent professional, it’s worth trying something out of the ordinary — especially if you’re feeling stuck. You can’t predict how editors will react, but if you’re being genuine and gracious to them, no reasonable editor would hate you just for doing something differently. If they do, consider yourself lucky to have been warned about their inner crazy before you got stuck working with them.

So what will you try that’s not in the books? Be brave and take a risk. Go ahead — run with a stick in your mouth! Jump on the good furniture! Call an editor! Take it from me — it’s good to be bad.

How about you? Have you ever broken a rule of freelance writing and benefited as a result? Or have you found a marketing tactic other freelancers would scoff at, but that works for you? Let us know in the Comments below!

Deb Mitchell is a freelance writer in Charlotte, NC specializing in writing about interior design and women’s interest topics. She also works with business clients to make their websites and client communications the best they can be and with students as a general writing and college application essay coach.

After a somewhat rough start, Manhattan is starting to “hit its stride,” says EIC Cristina Cuomo. The pub, which launched in the midst of the financial crisis, is unlike other city mags since it’s more like a national book with local flavor. And Cuomo, whose first issue with the pub was September’s, is on a mission to “give the magazine a personality and a sense of humor.”

Among her changes? A new section called “The Fictionist,” which welcomes anyone with literary chops be they veteran or newbie authors. Writers can pitch short stories or book excerpts.

For more info, read How To Pitch: Manhattan. [subscription required]

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Brain, Child is not your typical parenting pub. It’s as much a literary mag as it is a parenting one, so it wants writers who can pen more than the usual service angle of most family mags.

The brainy book recently switched leadership, and its new editor in chief, Marcelle Soviero, said “I’m definitely keeping the major tenants of the magazine, which are that we’re a literary magazine for women and that we publish essays, short stories and a feature article in each issue.”

Soviero also said she hopes to develop a poetry section and expand the book reviews. Bonus: she loves working with new writers.  ”I’ve been that new author. I know what that’s like, and I always appreciated when magazines would take a chance on me. I like to do that for people, as well, as long as the work is excellent and meets our needs,” she said.

Read more in How To Pitch: Brain, Child: The Magazine for Thinking Mothers. [subscription required]

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

By Rosella Eleanor LaFevre

My first attempt at making a magazine was in sixth grade. My friend and I wrote articles and compiled visuals that we glued to sheets of Xerox paper.

One Sunday I sat at my family’s copier and manually assembled ten double-sided copies of my 30+ page magazine, called RoZgIrl, that I passed out to my classmates the next day at school. I got a rush sharing my work with other people.

Then, as a sophomore in journalism school, I decided to start my own magazine for real. I’d watched magazines succeed and fall apart in my various internships and decided I could do this for real.

M.L.T.S. Magazine, a quarterly online publication that covers lifestyle, education and career topics for young women in college, was launched in June 2011.

It’s been the greatest challenge of my life and the rewards are addictive (being profiled on the Huffington Post was the coolest honor!). Among the many things I’ve learned from starting my own magazine are a few that have informed my interaction with editors at other magazines.

1. Editors are always looking for new writers.

Honestly, I get a little giddy every time a new writer contacts me saying they want to write for M.L.T.S. When I set out to create a magazine, I knew that I couldn’t write all of the articles, gather all the artwork, do the layout and promote the publication and so I did a big recruiting push – contacting j-school listservs and Ed2010 – and I got a lot of nibbles but very few writers stuck around.

Writers are a crucial part of the team and yet no matter how many writers I have, I’m always looking for new ones. I’ve had several writers back out at the last minute so I prefer having lots of writers on tap.

The takeaway: Even if you think there’s no way in heck that you’ll get a response, send that pitch or LOI!

2. Editors love controversy and shock-factor.

When I made that first magazine in sixth grade, I wrote a piece for the FOB fashion section about a classmate who anointed herself chief of the fashion police and made declarative statements about what the girls wore to school. I never used her name but my classmates knew who I meant. As my peers all turned to the same page and I heard whispers, I realized how important controversy can be for getting people interested in your magazine.

After starting M.L.T.S. my focus shifted toward page views and Facebook likes and my boyfriend kept saying, “Publish controversial stuff. Pick an unpopular view and write about it. Get people to notice you.” And he’s right. I need to publish stuff that will get people reading, responding and sharing if I want people to notice my magazine.

The takeaway: Writers might have an easier time breaking into a market if they pitch stories that are controversial or have great shock factor.

3. Editors sometimes need to be reminded that you sent that awesome pitch.

I get a lot of emails on my Android phone and sometimes, I just don’t feel like typing up a long response on its little screen or I want to read your resume and sample clips on my big computer… Then I forget to do those things when I’m next in front of a computer. Lots of times, it takes me a week to get back to writers.

Every now and then, a writer who has emailed me once will

A mentoring client recently told me she was going on vacation and was wondering if being unavailable for a month would hurt her career.

Au contraire — I think a vacation is a great excuse to keep in touch with your editors. Whenever I go away, I e-mail all my editors beforehand — even ones I haven’t worked with in a while, or editors who I’ve built a relationship with but haven’t written for yet — to tell them I’ll be away and unavailable for assignments between dates X and Y.

Then, when I get back, I e-mail them all again to let them know I’m back and ready for more work if they need someone.

When I do this, I often get replies from my editors that they’ll have work for me soon.

Editors and clients typically have a stable of writers, and if you want to be the one who garners assignments, you need to be top of mind when those assignments come up so it’s you they think of.

Here are some “excuses” you may have to stay in touch with your editors and clients:

1. You’ve moved. Of course you’ll want to send all your editors your new address!

2. You have a new phone number or e-mail address. Ditto.

3. You’ll be unavailable for new work for a while. For example, if you’re going on vacation, moving, on maternity leave, or booked up with work.

4. You scored a writing coup you want to share. For instance, you broke into an impressive market or won an award.

5. You have an opening in your schedule. I like to let my editors know when I’ve finished a batch of deadlines and am open for new assignments.

6. You have a new website you want to share. Send editors and clients there to get a look at your clips, client list, and more.

7. You’ve just added a bunch of clips to your writer site. This shows that you’re a successful freelance writer who gets lots of work — and shows your editors and clients what you can do!

I typically write to my editors every month or two — not every single week. Just enough to remind them I still exist without coming off as a stalker.

What excuses do you use to stay in touch with your editors and clients? Share your insights in the Comments below! [lf]

I answer your burning freelancing questions on the blog. If you have a question, e-mail it to me at [email protected]. Have a lot of questions? Consider signing up for a phone mentoring session.

Susan asks: I have a question for you about word counts: How closely do you adhere to editors’ requests for 800-900 words, or whatever amount/range they specify? I tend to write toward the top end of the word count – it’s easy enough to find another hundred words, most of the time, and I figure I might as well if I’m being paid by the word. But how often do you let yourself go over the upper limit, and by how much?

A long time ago, I read (and I wish I could remember where) that you can go under or over the word count by 10%. However, I think that if you had an assignment for 900 words and you turned in 810, your editor would be pretty unhappy.

I tend to go over on almost every assignment by 10% or so. I do this to pack in all the information that the editor could possibly want on the topic, and to give him room to do his job and still end up within the specified range. I’ve found that if I leave out info to make the word count, the editor invariably comes back and asks for it, and it always happens at an inconvenient time. (FYI, my clients usually pay a flat fee for an article, so if I go over the word count it doesn’t mean more money for me — so that’s not an issue for my editors.)

On shorts (typically 300 words or less), I’ve gone over even more. One time I was writing a 300-word short for a national health magazine and the editor came back and asked for so much additional information that the piece ballooned to 800 words. Her comments ran along the lines of, “You neglected to include the entire history of the known universe.” When I mentioned to the editor that it was difficult to fit the history of the universe into 300 words, she told me to write long and she would cut. Soon afterward I was writing a 300-word short for another national health magazine and said, “What the hell, I’ll write however many words I need to get in all the info the editor wants.” And guess what? The editor was thrilled. Looking back, it was a crazy thing for me to do and I wouldn’t recommend it for most situations, but it did prove a point — that editors would rather get all the information up front than have to come back and ask for it later.

(And that is why I rarely write shorts anymore. Editors ask for 300 words, but they really want you to write 800, and then they’ll cut it down to 300. Shorts pay less than department pieces and features, so why take an assignment that pays for 300 words when you know the editor is going to come back and ask you for 500 more (at no extra pay)? You’re writing a full-length article at FOB pay. Shorts are a great way to break into a magazine, but moneymakers they are not.)

So: Over (if you need it), not under, and typically 10% is the limit. And if you’re writing an article and discover that there’s more info than will fit into the allotted word count, it can’t hurt to ask the editor if he’d like you to go over.

I hope that helps! [lf]