I don't mean to brag or anything, but I just sat through The Clone Wars. What an appalling waste of two hours. Getting three fillings at once would have been more enjoyable.
Sue George Lucas I must. Brain damage now I have.
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Okay, now that I'm home I have to mention a few things that really bugged me about The Clone Wars:
- Luke, or Anakin, or whatever-his-name-is Skywalker has a new female apprentice. Is she dressed like the other Jedi? Is she wearing articulated armor from head to toe? No, she wears a bandeaux top (no straps!), a mini skirt and what looks like Uggs. Ugh, indeed.
- The Clone Wars is a cartoon, right? So, they can draw people however they'd like. But...female characters were drawn much differently than the males. In particular, the shoulder blades of the women were drawn back and almost pinched together. How can a woman fight like that? She can't, that's how.
- Too loud. With all that shooting and laser blade fighting, a mom can't sleep through the horror. Believe me, I tried.
- The "plot" centers around the kidnapping of Jabba the Hut's son. Somehow involved in this scheme is Jabba's Uncle. Who is also a she. S/he is a stereotype so offensive, I was unable to even analyze what was going on. Of course, s/he is the villain.
- No Chewbacca, so I didn't have to listen to that Chewbacca sound throughout the movie.
21 Comments on How much do you love your children?, last added: 9/1/2008
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I sat through Happy Feet. Could Clone Wars really be worse than that?
Can you scream "didactic"?
"Oh, Mom, look at the not-so-cute little penguins who can't even sing or dance very well."
But, yeah, you're a good mom!
Tricia: I heard Happy Feet was pretty bad, but I'm not sure I've ever seen a movie as bad as "The Clone Wars." Even my son--not a discerning movie-goer--hated this one.
Oh, my goodness, Happy Feet was academy award material compared to Clone Wars. My son requested a birthday party trip to it,so we hauled seven boys there and back. They loved it; the best I can say about it is that at a couple of points I was able to close my eyes and try to nap. But too often I couldn't even do that, as the video-game violence was too insistent. It was abysmal.
I saw Hellboy II with my nephew. I kept on thinking this is one of the reasons why I won't have kids I am too selfish. It went on forever my butt got sore. I had to stop myself sighing loudly. I thought I was the only one who hated Happy Feet
Libby: Oh, so you know my pain :) Tricia--consider yourself duly warned!
Doret: Hellboy? No way, no how for me. You poor thing!!
The Chewbacca noise is far better than anything in episodes 1-3 or, I'm banking, the Clone Wars cartoon.
He was better when he had someone to watch over him and edit him.
It sounds shudderingly horrible and painful to sit through! I like your analysis. (Do you share a little of that with your kids? They might benefit.)
Kelly, you're probably right. Ack, it was so awful, I'm still recovering...
Cheryl: Absolutely. I especially wanted my son to notice that the girl was dressed differently. Then I asked him what he thought about that. Could a girl really fight in a mini tube top and a skirt?
I'm pretty sure I could kick some serious clone butt in a tube top and mini skirt.
Tricia: Go for it! Remember, though, your shoulder blades must nearly touch in back when you're wielding your light saber. If your top stops to slip...you're out of luck :)
Oops! STARTS to slip...all the cliches and Yoda-speak have scrambled my mind.
You can repay Eli by making HIM watch all the star wars movies with Quinn (and not me)
Hah, Kate, I will! Great idea :) 13-year-old Eli will realize what a great mother I was.
I love mine enough to sit through the horrid Clone Wars, too. They thought it was fabulous. All I saw was a cheap way to exploit Star Wars fans for more money. Very disappointing.
It was pretty surprising to me to see only parents with children in the theater, though. No adult Star Wars fans unless they had rug rats with them.
(heee, hee, hee, heee!)
I have really nothing else to add. Just... snickering.
Breeni: So you also fell victim, like Libby and I did. And, yes: we saw it late, but even so...it was only children and parents. Lots of doubles, like my son and I. To be fair, there were no other kids movies out and the other pairs were probably like my son and I--we had 6 hours to kill, and this took 2 of them. No Star Wars Fans in sight.
Tanita: Go ahead and laugh. It's funny in RETROSPECT. :)
:No, she wears a bandeaux top (no straps!), a mini skirt and what looks like Uggs. Ugh, indeed.:
URGH.
You love your kids more than I do because I couldn't make it through more than 45 minutes of the video before leaving the room in disgust! What a huge disappointment. I couldn't even tell if there was a plot.
Cuileann: I mean, really. It's too much, isn't it?
Kate: If I had seen it on video, I'd be out weeding before watching the whole thing. Unfortunately....I was in a theater.
I feel your pain. My sons had to see this, too. I left the theatre with a headache, both from the noise and from trying to follow what was going on.
I didn't get how the uncle was a female. She's an aunt, right? The bad guys attack. Then they pull back and attack again with a force field for protection. Why didn't they use the force field in the first place?
God bless Pixar, is all I can say as a parent.
Anon. No kidding. I actually enjoyed a few of the Pixars!