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Lynn Davidman, author of Becoming Un-Orthodox: Stories of Ex-Hasidic Jews, not only interviewed former Orthodox Jews for her book; she was a former Modern Orthodox herself. Davidman answered some questions for us about her experience leaving Orthodox Judaism and how it informed her research.

Aside from being the topic of your book, you also became un-Orthodox, and in fact were disowned from your family. How did your own experience becoming un-Orthodox inform your writing?

My own experiences of leaving Orthodoxy informed this book every step along the way. I had been reading and learning about self-reflexivity before I began this project, and I tried to be self-reflexive in every stage of the research, beginning with conceiving this study (which came out of my gut, reflecting my desire to learn about people’s similar—although also different—experiences in leaving). I analyzed my stance in relation to this book and wrote about it within the book. I felt strongly that readers needed to know “where I was coming from” to help them better assess the quality of my analysis. I also described some of my experiences throughout the book, I think a bit in each chapter; because I think it is a much more honest approach and because I think readers are interested in learning about the author and her life.

How did your own experience leaving Orthodox Judaism compare to those you write about?

My own experiences leaving Orthodox Judaism were in many ways easier (despite being disowned). Modern Orthodox Jews engage with the secular world; their philosophy is following Torah and being a person in the world. So, as a Modern Orthodox, I grew up knowing about the secular world of movies, television, plays, etc. I went to a university, which helped me leave, and when I left I knew I could manage well in the secular world.

In contrast, the Hasidic defectors did not know much about the secular world. They grew up speaking Yiddish, and newspapers, television, and other forms of secular media were banned from their homes. They grew up in a community in which they were encapsulated physically, socially, and ideologically. They were taught that non-Jews are threatening and that many of them were like animals. So they were terrified of leaving: they did not have the education needed to find jobs to support themselves in the secular world; they had no idea how to find an apartment, or how to finance it; the men spoke Yiddish and poor English. So they had a lot more cultural learning to do in order to leave than I had. Also they had to “disinscribe” the Haredi markers from their bodies—learn to dress differently (putting on pants was a big deal for the women) and comport themselves in a more open way.

Did any interviews surprise you? If so, what was it that surprised you?

One aspect of my interviews that surprised me is that none of the people I spoke to were fully cut off from their families as I had been. I expected I would find other defectors (than me) had been cut off from their families. Some remained quite distant or not in contact with their families for a few years, but usually became reconnected after the passage of time… or when a grandchild was born. Some, though, have very poor and painful relationships with their families, speaking of emotional distance and pain.

I was also surprised by the sheer amount of abuse—physical, sexual, and emotional—I heard in the stories. One woman knew from childhood that her mother simply did not like her and she still does not get along with her; she told me others (such as a doctor or a relative) could clearly tell her mother disliked her intensely. The stories of sexual abuse were so sad to talk about and many exclaimed about the irony of the abusers being part of a very religious community where they are supposed to be pious.

What do you hope readers will take away from the book?

For one, I want them to take away an understanding of the body as central to all social interaction and institutions. I would like them to see how embodiment is not one aspect of a person but the fundamental ground of everyone’s being. I have a fantasy they will come away understanding we need to reverse Descartes: I think therefore I am and instead have it as “I am therefore I think.”

I hope readers will understand both the uniqueness of Haredi life, and the similarities between defectors and others who change their identities through the medium of the body such as LGBTQ people.

I want to complicate the common sense assumption that all Orthodox Jews are alike.

A deeper understanding of how the perspective of the author shapes written work: both books and articles. I would like them to understand there is no “objectivity” in social science research and therefore the more the author reveals about her perspective, the better they are able to judge the quality of the work.

The post Leaving Orthodox Judaism: A Q&A with Lynn Davidman appeared first on OUPblog.

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And I know this probably isn't the release day you're all waiting for (only 91 more days until EVERBLAZE releases--EEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!) But I'm always super excited when my books finally release in paperback, because when I was growing up, paperbacks were pretty much the only books my parents could afford. So it makes me ever so happy to finally have EXILE available at a cheaper price point.

Even better: the shiny paperback only costs $6.99--and considering it's 592 pages that is a HUGE BARGAIN!!!!

Even, EVEN better? Those shiny paperbacks also include THIS, which I KNOW you're all excited about:


As if you needed more reasons to pick up a copy, I'm also hosting a special swag giveaway to celebrate, since I don't think hardcover release days should get to have all the fun. So here's how this works:

If you pre-ordered the paperback version of EXILE any time before August 5, 2014--OR if you purchase a paperback copy between now and August 10, 2014--fill out the form at the bottom of this post by 11:59pm pacific time on August 11, 2014, and I will send you these:

(in case you can't tell, that's a signed EXILE bookplate and a limited edition signed Verdi art print postcard)

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Instead of an MMGM shout-out this week, I'm going to (rather shamelessly) use the space to let you know that the EXILE ebook is on sale. Butbutbut--it has such a pretty graphic!!!

And because there are no limits to my shamelessness, I've even made you handy links, to make it that much easier should you choose to take advantage of the deal:

Also, if you decide to buy the kindle version (which can of course be read with a kindle app, even if you don't own a kindle) you can then get the audiobook for only $3.99. Which means for less than $6, you can get an ebook AND an audiobook--now that's what I call a deal.

If any of you feel like helping me spread the word, I MIGHT love you forever. But I promise I am now done being shameless. ON TO THE MMGM LINKS!!!!

- Reader Noir joins the MMGM fun,with a feature on ONE WISH. Click HERE to welcome them to the group! 

- Jennifer from 5 Minutes for Books is featuring the Choose Your Own Path Treasure Island book--and GIVING AWAY 10 BOOKS in the series. Click HERE for details. 

- The B.O.B. is spreading some love for THE NAME OF THIS BOOK IS SECRET. Click HERE to see why.  

- Faith Hough is shouting from the rooftops for THE ACTUAL AND TRUTHFUL ADVENTURE OF BECKY THATCHER, and interviewing the author. Click HERE for all the fun.

- Mark Baker is finding out that THERE'S TREASURE EVERYWHERE. Click HERE to see his review. 

-Michelle Isenhoff has chills for THE SECRET OF HAUNTED BOG. Click HERE to see why. 

- Suzanne Warr is spotlighting CIRCA NOW. Click HERE to see her review.  

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Hey there all you awesome KEEPER fans!

Don't worry--the old Team KEEPER Continued page is still working just fine, and going strong at over 500 comments. But because it's been so popular, I know some of you have been getting tired of sorting through the chaos, trying to find new comments in your various conversations. I wish I had a better way to keep everything organized for you guys, but my hands are a bit tied as far as what I can do.

So for those of you who at least wanted a fresh page to chat... TA DA! Consider this your new Team KEEPER page! (though like I said, the old one is still working, so you're welcome to keep commenting over there as well)

While I have you here, I thought it might also be a good time to give a few updates and answer some of the questions I keep seeing over and over and over.

First, the current official release date for EVERBLAZE is 11/4/14, so WOOOOOOOO, only about 5 months to go!!!!

The title, cover, and a brief description of the plot have all been released (if you somehow missed them, you can find them on the KEEPER main page by clicking here HERE) and the book is now officially DONE! And I have to say, I'm pretty proud of it. It was by FAR the toughest book I've ever written, but I really think we ended up with something you guys are going to LOVE. So excited to have you read!

*glares at calendar, wishing it were November*

Sadly, that's really all I can say about EVERBLAZE (trying to keep the internetz spoiler-free and all that jazz). But I CAN tell you that I have lots of fun things planned for the next few months as we lead up to the release day.

I'll be touring in August to celebrate the launch of the EXILE paperback (I promise I'll post the dates, times, and locations as soon as I have the final details. For now just know that a tour is happening). And I have some very fun contests coming up in the months ahead. Some of the giveaways will be right here on this blog. Others will be on social media, so if you use those platforms (and your parents are okay with it), you might wanna make sure you're following me there. Here's some handy links to make that easier:



Okay, I think that gets you all up to speed on everything. So you are now free to comment away! But like always, PLEASE make sure you keep your discussions spoiler-free, so we don't ruin the fun for anyone who hasn't read both books yet. Also please keep your comments to each other positive or friendly. I want this to be a happy, safe place.

Also, if you need a refresher on who the teams are:

Ever feel like you don't belong? Then you look no further--you belong with Team Sophie! You may not always have the answers, but you're brave and smart, and if you trust yourself, you can handle anything. And as for who holds your heart? Only time will tell how you decide . . .

Ever feel like the underdog? Then welcome to Team Dex! You may have people constantly underestimating you, but you'll prove them all wrong someday. And while you may be the ultimate BFF, you're hoping to break out of the "friend zone" eventually. (you might have pretty great dimples, too . . . )

Ever caused a mess of trouble--and loved every second of it? Then you definitely belong with Team Keefe!  Jokes and pranks are the highlight of your week--but that doesn't mean you can't be serious when you need to be. In fact, you care very deeply about . . . well, maybe you're not ready to admit *who* yet. But you're having fun driving the girls crazy in the meantime!

Ever feel pressure to be who everyone expects you to be? Then Team Fitz is the place for you ! You have the looks, the talent, and the family everybody envies--but that doesn't mean you do everything perfectly. And sometimes you can be a little oblivious when it comes to other people's feelings. But you'll hopefully figure it all out--eventually. . . 

Ever feel like no one understands you? Then find lots of people you can relate to on Team Iggy! You may be small and good at making a mess of things--but you always know when someone needs you. And you're happy to provide them with a cuddle, a purr, or a nose-full of toxic breath--whatever they need. And hey, you can rock every crazy fur color there is!

Ever feel like you're all alone? Then you'll find lots of friends with Team Silveny--plus more sparkles than anyone could ever need! You're special and one-of-a-kind and extremely loyal and caring. And no one can deny you have great taste in friends--even if they give you the craziest nicknames.

Now....GO!

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So wow. You guys have already maxed out the 200 Comment Limit on the new Team KEEPER page that I just built you--which is AWESOME, btw (clearly the KEEPER fandom is growing).

But it also leaves me with the *tiny* problem of not having anywhere for you guys to comment/interact with each other.

I've looked into lots of different things, but so far I haven't been able to find anything that lets you comment anonymously (since I know some of you have parents that don't want you creating accounts or using your name) and lets the comments be "threaded" (meaning you can reply to each other in a nice, organized, easy-to-follow way)

So for now, the only solution I can come up with is to move the conversation to another new place. Like oh, hey, RIGHT HERE.

You might want to bookmark this post so you can find it again, since this isn't a "page" like the others (though I have also added a link to this post on the Team KEEPER page, in case you can't find it). And if you fill all the comments on this page, I'll just create another.

SO.

As you were and carry on. Feel free to continue your Team debates (side note: I love that you guys are calling for me to make teams for characters who don't have them yet). It's also awesome that you guys have started discussing theories about things--though please, please, PLEASE make sure you keep that discussion spoiler-free, so we don't ruin the fun for anyone who hasn't read.

Also, if you need a refresher on who the teams are:

Ever feel like you don't belong? Then you look no further--you belong with Team Sophie! You may not always have the answers, but you're brave and smart, and if you trust yourself, you can handle anything. And as for who holds your heart? Only time will tell how you decide . . .

Ever feel like the underdog? Then welcome to Team Dex! You may have people constantly underestimating you, but you'll prove them all wrong someday. And while you may be the ultimate BFF, you're hoping to break out of the "friend zone" eventually. (you might have pretty great dimples, too . . . )

Ever caused a mess of trouble--and loved every second of it? Then you definitely belong with Team Keefe!  Jokes and pranks are the highlight of your week--but that doesn't mean you can't be serious when you need to be. In fact, you care very deeply about . . . well, maybe you're not ready to admit *who* yet. But you're having fun driving the girls crazy in the meantime!

Ever feel pressure to be who everyone expects you to be? Then Team Fitz is the place for you ! You have the looks, the talent, and the family everybody envies--but that doesn't mean you do everything perfectly. And sometimes you can be a little oblivious when it comes to other people's feelings. But you'll hopefully figure it all out--eventually. . . (and yes, we're all dying to see your picture!!!!) 

Ever feel like no one understands you? Then find lots of people you can relate to on Team Iggy! You may be small and good at making a mess of things--but you always know when someone needs you. And you're happy to provide them with a cuddle, a purr, or a nose-full of toxic breath--whatever they need. And hey, you can rock every crazy fur color there is!

Ever feel like you're all alone? Then you'll find lots of friends with Team Silveny--plus more sparkles than anyone could ever need! You're special and one-of-a-kind and extremely loyal and caring. And no one can deny you have great taste in friends--even if they give you the craziest nicknames.

Okay, and ............ GO!

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