Give me some credit. Even as a teen, I knew I had a future cult hero in Joe. His train-wreck performances quickly became the stuff of legend. White Lightning was a movie purported to be written and directed by Joe, and the joke is that he was as unflaggingly inept a filmmaker as he was an actor. Me making a joke about shoddy filmmaking? We can only hope I was in on the punchline. (Let's also take a moment to thank Joe for his sense of humor about all of this.)
Love Never Dies is next, a sweeping melodrama set to the tune of Gone with the Wind. Just like White Lightning, this co-stars my mom. While her surprise cameos are understandably poignant for me, they're also pretty hilarious - her nonplussed expression when Joe abandons her is priceless. With their equally wooden countenances, she and Joe were truly the perfect on-screen couple.
And then something totally bizarre: the preview cuts away to me as Peter Jennings, relating a news story of Admiral James Stockdale opening fire at a local Wal-mart. Political satire? Seriously? I couldn't tell you, because I have no memory of making this.
Lastly we have Croc-Face. Aside from a lame Fear in-joke, I can't make heads or tails of this one. Fake arms? Dental floss? Believe me, I wish I knew, because I'm sure my future therapist will ask.
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Hi. My name is Daniel Kraus. I'm a novelist and filmmaker. When I was growing up in Iowa, I made movies with my friends. Many of them were remakes of movies I liked, like MISERY or THE GODFATHER. Others were originals. All of them were awful. Now, to lead up to the publication of my new book, THE MONSTER VARIATIONS, I'm blogging my old movies chronologically for your enjoyment. Let's feel the pain together.
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