BARBIE, KEN AND THE REST IN PLASTICVILLE
BY ELEANOR TYLBOR
The continuing and sometimes funny, sad but always interesting story about life and love among the plastic people)
The story so far: Barbie, famous fashionista and media doll celebrity and cyber star of the continuing cyber soap opera, BARBIE KEN AND THE REST IN PLASTICVILLE, has now been relegated to a warehouse, somewhere, along with her friends, KEN, G.I. JOE, BLAIN, the BRATZ, due to a product recall. In stark contrast to their former lives of wearing expensive high end clothes and doing the club scene, they are now in the dark in the true sense of the word, stashed away in boxes.
As we pick up the story, they are in the midst of planning a rebellion to draw attention to their plight and get free in time for the Christmas rush.
BARBIE
Okay. Can we get started? Is everyone here?
G.I. JOE
Oh I’m here babe! Big time! All I gotta do is flip the trigger on this here weapon of mass destruction and then… Boom! We’re outta here big time!
BARBIE
Joe, Joe, Joe… Get this through that thick plastic blob sitting between your shoulders…
G.I. JOE
…I love when you talk dirty like that babe…
BARBIE…whatever. Like...has it hit you yet you are lying down flat on your back in a cardboard box, unable to move?
G.I. JOE
Has what hit me? Nothing hit me! At least I didn’t feel nothing… Uh-oh - it's the enemy planning to strike and I gotta act like…fast and protect youze all! All I hav'ta do is pick up my weapon here... Arm - move! It's gonna move now... I...think...I...feel...something cold...in...my...hand...
BARBIE
(sighing)
Like...just forget about your weapon. 'Kay? Focus Joe - focus!
G.I. JOE
I'm...not sure of...what...this is... I don't remember...them...making weapons with long tails. Then again...a soldier has'ta be prepared for everything and I'm the best, y'know
BARBIE
You’re a legend in your own mind. Ken? Are you around, here, somewhere?
KEN
I-I’m scared, Barbie! It’s so…dark here. And...and I'm soooo cold... Why am I so cold, Barbie?
BARBIE
'Cause it's winter and you're wearing your surfing outfit! You don't have to be scared. I'll protect you
G.I. JOE
Hey! That’s a soldier’s job!
BARBIE
Listen G.I. – like…let me lay it on you the way things are. You are stuck in a cardboard box along with the rest of us
G.I. JOE
Hey! A soldier is never stuck! A soldier always has options!
KEN
(sobbing)
Mommy! I want my mommy!
G.I. JOE
Oh shut your trap, sissy boy! Act like a man and not a cry-baby for pete's sake! ‘I-want-my-mommy…’ This man’s army would make a man out’ta you. Ten-shun!
BARBIE
Like…how did this happen? Me, a former fashionista whose biggest problem was what outfit to wear and which club opening to be at? Look at what I’m reduced to? Can we get on with this meeting? Blain? Are you around somewhere?
BLAIN
Here! Trying…to…lift…this…top… Forgetaboutit. When I was in Australia…
G.I. JOE
There he goes again, talkin’ about that there strange soundin’ place ‘Stra-li-a! ‘Stralia this and Stralia that.’ We don’t care about your weird sounding place with a foreign name! Got that? Or maybe you need a little convincin’ with some lead…
BARBIE
Don’t listen to him, Blain. Like…his elevator don’t go to the top floor if you get my drift. Can we start now? Like…Christmas is almost here and like…we gotta be on the shelves in toy stores or we’ll never be here…forever! We hav'ta make our move, now
(sound of sobbing coming from KEN’s box)
G.I. JOE
There he goes again. ‘Wa-wa-wa!’ Be a real doll for once in your life, soldier! Ten-shun!
BARBIE
Know what’s really sad?
G.I. JOE
I’ll tell you what’s sad, babe! I could run out’ta bullets!
BARBIE
Like…I’ve been wearing the same outfit for like…months! I mean, a fashionista like me deserves better! And…and…nobody will wanna buy me because my beautiful blond hair will be flat and…and…
BLAIN
It’s okay. In my eyes, Barbie – you’ll always be the most beautiful sheila around
G.I. JOE
What’s that? Who’s Sheila? Did he make a pass at you, babe? ‘Cause if he did…
BARBIE
Oh Blain! If only…if only…we weren’t stored away in boxes and…and…we could like…reach out and touch each other…
BLAIN
We have to make a big push to get out. What if your friend, Joe, there, could shoot himself out of his box and then he could do the same for us…
BARBIE
Like…I dunno. The last time he fired his weapon, he shot his right foot off
G.I. JOE
Hey! You promised that would be our secret. Did I cry, huh? Did I? No I didn’t because I’m a real soldier! Not like sissy-boy over there… Anyway, I still got one good foot
BLAIN
Listen – we don’t have much choice, here. Um…G.I. – we need your services as a soldier!
BARBIE
Like…I dunno. I’m getting a bad feeling about this
QUESTION DU JOUR: WILL G.I. JOE BE ABLE TO FREE THEM FROM THEIR CARDBOARD PRISONS? MORE TO THE POINT, WILL THEY SURVIVE? STATE TUNED FOR THE NEXT INSTALLMENT OF “BARBIE, KEN AND THE REST IN PLASTICVILLE”
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By: scriberess,
on 11/3/2007
Blog: A. PLAYWRIGHT'S RAMBLINGS (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: Plasticville, plastic dolls, fashionista, play. cyber soap opera, Blain, soldier, funny, Plasticville, Barbie, plastic dolls, fashionista, fun, Christmas, humor, fashion, club, G.I. Joe, Blain, Ken, play. cyber soap opera, soldier, funny, Barbie, club, Ken, G.I. Joe, Add a tag
By: Rebecca,
on 8/30/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: duke, A-Featured, book, Literature, classics, oxford, American History, Prose, black, A-Editor's Picks, adventures, club, world s, race, arab, finn, huckleberry, jim, mark, twain, Add a tag
In chapter 24 of Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, Jim complains to the duke that “it got mighty heavy and tiresome to him when he had to lay all day in the wigwam tied with the rope” (143) pretending to be a runaway slave. So the duke comes up with a clever solution, “He dressed Jim up in King Lear’s outfit…and then he took his theatre-paint and painted Jim’s face and hands and ears and neck all over a dead dull solid blue, like a man that’s been drownded[sic] nine days…Then the duke took and wrote a sign on a shingle…Sick Arab-but harmless when not out of his head.”
Wait, it gets worse. (more…)
By: Beth Gallaway,
on 8/19/2007
Blog: The Hip Librarians' Book Blog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: gooey, natalie, lunis, no, backbone, jellyfish, gooey, jellyfish, natalie, lunis, no, backbone, Add a tag
Part of a series on invertabrates, Gooey Jellyifsh presents facts about these spineless sea creations in clear short sentences... Read the rest of this post
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By: Rebecca,
on 8/7/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: reading, adventure, Book, Literature, Classics, summer, Oxford, A-Featured, Prose, A-Editor's Picks, adventures, Club, World s, Finn, huckleberry, huck, relaxing, wrestles, hammock, sheepish, wrenching, Mark, Twain, tom, sawyer, Add a tag
I feel pretty sheepish admitting this but it took me a while this month to open The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. I assumed that since I had read it before, the book would not hold the same magic for me. I was wrong. I spent a nice portion of last weekend relaxing in a hammock reading, dreaming of traveling down the Mississippi with Huck and Jim. I’d forgotten much of the soul searching, gut-wrenching questions about “right” and “wrong” that Huck wrestles with. The book certainly reveals more upon each read.
I’ll save my full reactions for our discussion on the 30th but if you haven’t started reading yet start today. Huck is the perfect summertime companion.
By: Rebecca,
on 6/28/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: opinion, book, nature, angel, Prose, club, tess, hardy, plantation, mood, enviroment, reflect, interpret, discuss, Add a tag
Rebecca OUP-US
Depictions of nature often reflect the mood in Tess of the D’Urbervilles. For example as Tess sits listening to Angel play the harp, “The floating pollen seemed to be in his notes made visible, and the dampness of the garden the weeping of the garden’s sensibility. Though near nightfall, the rank-smelling weed-flowers glowed as if they would not close, for intentness, and the waves of colour mixed with the waves of sound” (page 139). (more…)
By: Rebecca,
on 6/28/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: book, Literature, women, oxford, feminism, classic, discussion, Prose, club, world, Tess, D Urbervilles, tragic, cry, emotional, tragedy, Add a tag
Rebecca OUP-US
I’m emotional. I sob in movies. Even bad movies like Boiler Room. Remember that one? It came out in like 1999 or 2000 and starred Giovanni Ribisi. There was a scene in which Ribisi’s character has an emotional break down in front of his father while reminiscing about a childhood biking accident. I sobbed like a baby and I didn’t even like the movie! So you can just imagine my reaction to the end of Tess of The D’Urbervilles. (more…)
By: Rebecca,
on 6/13/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: blog, book, Literature, oxford, class, classic, discussion, excerpt, A-Featured, Prose, club, tess, durbervilles, lord, Add a tag
By Rebecca OUP-US
To get you all excited about June’s Book Club pick, Tess of The D’Urbervilles, I decided to excerpt the first page. An important revelation is made that affects Tess throughout the whole book. So stop procrastinating and go read!
On an evening in the latter part of May a middle-aged man was walking homeward from Shaston to the village of Marlott, in the adjoining Vale of Blakemore or Blackmoor. The pair of legs that carried him were rickety, and there was a bias in his gait which inclined him somewhat to the left of a straight line.
By: Rebecca,
on 6/7/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: question, book, Literature, read, oxford, classic, A-Featured, share, Prose, A-Editor's Picks, club, world s, tess, answer, durbeyfield, d urbervilles, Add a tag
I’m very excited for this month’s book club pick for two reasons: I have never read Tess of the D’Urbervilles; before (so don’t ruin the ending for me!), and I plan on reading it by the water (in Bucks County) while soaking up some sunshine. Get your copy now so you can join our conversation on Thursday, June 28th. We really do want to hear what you think so feel free to leave comments, questions for others and suggestions. (more…)
By: Rebecca,
on 6/2/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: Music, band, History, Love, Reference, Summer, Current Events, Oxford, hearts, A-Featured, Online Resources, Dictionary, Leisure, club, peppers, lonely, underway, beatles, 1967, St, of, Add a tag
So yesterday was the anniversary of one of the most amazing musical moments of all time, the release of St. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band. The album kicked off the Summer of Love (we can only hope this summer is 1/10 as exciting) and everything changed. The Oxford Dictionary of National Biography and the American National Biography celebrated the event with an interactive album cover. To trip just click.
By: Rebecca,
on 5/29/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: book, Literature, oxford, A-Featured, Prose, club, conrad, secret, joseph, agent, Add a tag
By: Rebecca,
on 5/10/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: agent, book, Literature, Education, read, oxford, classic, discussion, Prose, club, conrad, secret, joseph, world, analyze, Add a tag
Just in case you haven’t had a chance to start reading Joseph Conrad’s The Secret Agent we thought we would give you a little teaser. Below is the first page. Be sure to check back on May 24th for our discussion as part of our Oxford World’s Classics Book Club.
Mr. Verloc, going out in the morning, left his shop nominally in charge of his brother-in-law. (more…)
By: Rebecca,
on 4/25/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: book, Literature, Education, Blogs, alice, discussion, A-Featured, Prose, A-Editor's Picks, wonderland, club, tortoise, puns, Add a tag
It’s finally book club day! Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland is a pretty quick read (and I’m not bragging but I read insanely fast) so I have been looking forward to our discussion for almost a month.
I am going to post discussion questions throughout the day and I encourage you to share your opinion. But before we officially start I’d like to propose a challenge. How may puns can you find in Alice in Wonderland? For example, on page 84 the following conversation takes place:
“Why did you call him Tortoise, if he wasn’t one?” Alice asked.
“We call him Tortoise because he taught us,” said the Mock Turtle angrily. “Really you are very dull.”
Get it? Tortoise, taught us, mwahaha. Okay, so go searching. List all the puns you find in the comment section and at the end of the day we will see who has the sharpest eyes (and wit!). Perhaps there will be a prize involved…
By: Rebecca,
on 4/23/2007
Blog: OUPblog (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: blog, book, Literature, classics, Education, Blogs, oxford, alice, discussion, A-Featured, Prose, alice’s, wonderland, adventures, discussing, thursday, forget, ready, club, world s, Add a tag
Today isn’t our Oxford World’s Classics discussion day (hence my bad pun about an “unblogday”). Don’t be too upset though, because we will be discussing Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland on Thursday. Get ready for some maddening discussion!