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My mom was something like a mommy-blogger, in 1973. From the time I was two to two-and-a-half, she wrote these astoundingly detailed letters about our lives and me and Miami, typed them up in quintuplicate, and mailed them to the whole family. I have multiple copies of some of them.

They’re an amazing resource for my book, and they prove, as she’s always claimed and I’ve doubted, that I was talking in complete sentences when I turned two. Apparently I was also always concerned with remembering everything that happened.

On the one hand the letters make me happy, because I can verrrry hazily remember some of what she describes, and because they’re so full of pride and love, but they also make me sad, because I can see how lonely she was.

I’m behind in sharing published pieces. Here’s a single-page spread that came out in the November ’14 issue of HighFive magazine. It’s fun to do the images for these fun, little poems!

Shannon Bowers’ son Alex loves Dr. Seuss’ Oh, the Places You’ll Go.

Shannon gets teary-eyed when they read it together. Someday Alex will grow up, go to college and live out his dreams. Alex gets teary-eyed when Shannon reads too many of the pages. He’s five now. That’s his job.

Recently, Alex and his classmates, students from diverse ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds, all picked out brand-new books from First Book to take home. They chose stories about history, princesses and sharks. Their excitement was overflowing; many of them had no books at home.

Books have always been an important part of Shannon’s life. Her parents read to her as a child, and she and her husband Paul entered parenthood sharing the belief that education creates opportunities. They have always made an effort to fill their home with books.

Since Alex was born, Shannon and Paul have made reading as a family part of their nightly routine. Alex picks out a book; they all pile into his bed and share the story together. These days, Alex really likes to read to one-year-old Michael. He gets frustrated if mom or dad interrupts.

Shannon hopes reading will help take Alex and Michael all the places they want to go – in their imaginations and in life. She hopes financial issues won’t stand in their way. She hopes the same can be true for all kids.

“Our kids, they’re five years old,” she said. “None of them are thinking about [the future] right now. But we are. We think about that kind of thing… I want all of these kids to know if they make good enough grades, and they do what they need to do, then it’s there. They can do whatever they want.”

Together we can prepare kids for brighter future. Please consider making a gift to First Book today.

The post Oh, the Places You’ll Go appeared first on First Book Blog.

Yesterday was one of those days. It is beyond my man-sized mind how everything fit together. I had nothing to do with its success or organization. But like a giant fuel-guzzling puzzle, the last piece set in perfectly about nine o’clock. Until then, my family ranged in different directions all across the metro area. The amazing thing is that the MTC (Mom-Traffic Controller) was absent for a good portion of it.

I had business on the other side of the city that kept me away until most of the flights were filed and done. If you know Atlanta traffic, you know that being on the other side of it on a weekday means that, while only thirty miles away, I may as well have been in Guatemala in case of an emergency. Sometimes, there is just no getting home. But the MTC needed me not.

The Grandaddy taxi (my kids’ favorite ride because it often stops for a milkshake) had a few trips, she called in a favor from another middle-school parent, my nephew’s girlfriend made a pick-up, and I think there were two dog sleds and a rickshaw involved. Of course, this day involved multiple after school activities for every child that required extra commutes. Here is where I think the MTC was just showing off – she drove an hour north of the city on a college visit and took the only other driver of the house with her. So she wasn’t even around to oversee her masterpiece!

Through some mystery of mother magic, everything worked out. I counted two children when I got home and the other two trudged through the door soon after. They looked haggard but familiar, so I’m fairly certain they are mine.

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Men, lest you think you could handle this task, let me recount for you my experience on Saturday (Car Day). I had one assigned job, ONE: pick up dancer daughter at 12:30. The brakes took a little longer than expected, but I finished and went inside to wipe the grime off of my fingertips so I could handle food. While at the sink, my phone lit up with a missed text. Instantly, I had that “Oh Crap!” moment when I saw the digital readout. You guessed it, 12:40. I forgot my one job, along with my daughter who sat waiting twenty minutes away. The forgotten child’s next text went to the MTC, who was at a play. I had planned to bribe my daughter’s silence with ice cream. But on the frantic trip to get her, I received from the MTC saying, “Nice job, Dad.” Exposed.

So, all hail the MTC! I don’t know where you received your degree in family flight management, but the entire (and somehow intact) family is glad you have it!

Today would have ben my mom's birthday.  This is what I said at her funeral on October 26th:

My mom was no ordinary mom.  I think sometimes she wanted to be ordinary, she wanted to blend in, but that wasn’t how God made her.  She was tall, she was an extrovert, she followed her heart, she spoke her mind.

She taught me so many things, but three were most important: to laugh, to listen, and to love.

Mom had a crazy sense of humor. I remember one April Fool’s Day I watched her pour cat food into the cat’s dish.  She said, “You know, this actually looks pretty good,” shook some in her hand, and ate it.  It turned out it was a new cereal that she had noticed looked a lot like cat food.  She had put the bag inside an empty box of Friskies.

Back in July, mom was hospitalized for three days.  A few days after she was discharged, a nurse called to follow up. My mom was in the bathroom and so I answered and started talking for her. Figuring the nurse would want to talk with her directly, I handed her the phone when she came out .

The first thing she said - and mind you, she knew this was a stranger - was "Help! Help! They've got me tied up in a closet and they're not feeding me."

A week or so before she died, we were talking about how everyone has something at their core. Mom said she realized hers was to listen. She made friends everywhere she went, and it didn’t matter if they were young or old or homeless or rich. She loved meeting new people. A few months ago we went for a walk in the Eastwood Cemetery.  She was so weak that she only made it a few feet inside the entrance. But then a young woman she had never talked to walked by. And of course Mom perked up and learned all about her.  It completely rejuvenated her.

And finally, Mom was all about God and about love.  And for her the two were the same.  When I go back and look in my emails, there are dozens from her that have the word “love” in the subject line. She said love is the only thing, that love is all there is and that’s plenty.

I’m going to try to be more like mom - to laugh more, listen more, and love more.

Without a doubt, it's a challenge being a mom, working full-time, writing, promoting a book, and being an MFA student.

Sometimes, I feel like I go from one job to another, so when it's time to cook dinner, it's a source of major stress. I actually like to cook, but I don't know how to cook too many things. This past year, I've focused on eating fresher foods so I'm not in favor of box-a-meals, although I do use them.

I'm fortunate to have a dietitian at work and I've recently starting keeping a food diary on My Fitness Pal. My meals are too carb heavy so I was challenged to come up with some other ideas.

I'd like to branch out and learn more quick meals so she gave me an awesome cookbook, The New Soul Food Cookbook. It's actually a book for diabetics which I'm not, but I am trying to make meals low in carbs and sugars to help me lose weight.

It has delicious looking recipes with only a few ingredients-Perfect for a working mom. I can't wait to try some.

Tonight we made a really tasty meal and my daughter actually made the hot dog dish. I made the quinoa salad.

Here's how we did it:

Hot Dogs: (Let your kids make this)

I put some melted butter in a small bowl, and she painted slices of 100% whole wheat bread.
She put a turkey hot dog in the middle, then wrapped the bread (buttered side out) around the hot dog. We fastened it with a skewer because I didn't have a toothpick.

We baked for 18 minutes on 325 degrees.

Quinoa:

I made the quinoa according to the instructions on the box, except I used vegetarian broth instead of water to give it extra flavor. I put some yellow squash, carrots, and zucchini in my mini food processor, then added that to the quinoa. I also threw in some grape tomatoes and green beans from our garden.

Quinoa is a good alternative to rice or pasta. It has protein in it and isn't as starchy. Plus it's a great dish to hide your veggies in.

We added some fresh strawberries as another side dish.

It was a filling meal, not to mention nutritious. It was great to have my daughter actually make part of the meal and she was so proud of herself. It only took 20 minutes, and was minimal clean-up. Two big positives in my house.

Here's a photo:

I found this round rock today while I was running. When I was a toddler, my mom was having a difficult time. My dad was working at an all-news radio station that was going down the tubes (and would soon become an all-rock-and-roll station). My dad had chased jobs across four states, and they were so broke they couldn't even afford a stroller.

Hi Everyone,

I am so sorry I haven't blogged for a bit, but my mother died. A bunch of people asked me to post her eulogy here, so I will. I tried to channel the amazing actor Tom Hiddleston when I gave it, but since I am neither tall nor British, nor male, nor possess a cool voice of awesome, that didn't work so well. 

It feels a bit weird to post this on my blog/website, but I'm not sure how else to get it out there other than a mass email, and the truth is that I think my mom would kind of like her eulogy to posted for the internet world to randomly see if they randomly come here. My mom was like that. She'd like to be remembered.  

Eulogy

Our mom, Betty, was propped up in a hospital bed in Manchester, NH just about a week ago today, and if she saw herself then she would have had a fit. Believe me. She didn’t like to be out of the house if her hair wasn’t combed or her lipstick wasn’t perfectly applied. I can not begin to tell you how many times I sat in her car, waiting to go to the grocery store, the library, a birthday party or even the dump and counted the seconds while she reapplied her lipstick in that painstaking way that mothers have.  Let’s just say that she took her time, and I was a very impatient kid. But there was a reason she wanted to put that lipstick on: She wanted to make sure she looked beautiful.

And in the hospital last week, ravaged from illness, with her heart trying so hard to beat, with her lungs trying so hard to breathe, my mother wouldn’t have thought she was beautiful. But she was.

She sat up in that hospital bed and Bruce and Debbie used a plastic spoon to feed her some chocolate and vanilla ice cream from a tiny Styrofoam cup. The moment that first spoonful of ice cream hit her lips, our mother, with her eyes closed and her heart failing, broke into a smile that lit up her entire face with a joy so sheer and absolute that it brought tears to everyone’s eyes.       She was beautiful.     She was always beautiful, but that beauty didn’t come from her lipstick, or even from her smile. That beauty came from her soul. That beauty came from her love.

Our mother was an expert in love. “I love you with every ounce of my being,” she would write on birthday cards, Easter cards, those little tags that go on Christmas presents and emails.

And proud? She was brilliant at proud. Every grandchild was a trophy to her – shiny and gleaming full of light and importance. She polished them with her love and words and pride in their deeds. Keith, her firefighting hero boy, her handy man, the first of her grandbabies. Kevin, the one she thought looked the most like her – so smart and now a hero boy police officer who helped bring her the great grandbabies that she thought were so beautiful. Kayla. She would tell me sooo many soccer stories about Kayla but her favorite story was how when Kayla was in first grade or something like that she learned sign language

here is the finished illustration for the november 2011 issue of SFC magazine http://www.storiesforchildrenmagazine.com. AND it's 5 days BEFORE deadline! yay me!
to sum up the story entitled " a little helper", it's about a little boy named tanner who wants so desperately to help out his mama. he figures he might not be tall enough to reach that rye bread or those bananas, but boy is he ever going to take a shot at those yummy oranges...since they are on her shopping list. oops...;)
i'll post the link for the issue as soon as it is available!
next up....an awesome contest i discovered on a wonderful website entitled they draw and cook http://www.theydrawandcook.com/. i can't tell you how long i have been aching to pump out a recipe/illustration for these guys. super excited. have my idea all ready to go...just need to sketch it out!:)

I parted with a big bag of fresh picked green beans and a copy of The Soldier's Wife by Margaret LeRoy today as I gave them to my Mom for her 85th birthday.  My Mom is a Mom among Moms.  I think she might stand 5 feet tall if she throws her shoulders back.  I'm about 5'5".  One of my brothers is 6'5".  Every one of my Mom's kids is taller than she is and we all were by the time we were 14.  Tiny as she is, my Mom is a wonder. She is, hands down, the sweetest, happiest person I know, even after bringing nine children into the world, making a home for two Cuban teens, and a couple of foster babies.

The bunch of us got together and gave Mom a Kindle for her birthday.  It was Mariane's idea, but she was urged to action by Heidi and our sister-in-law, Gail.  Mom is thrilled with this new gadget.  She is an old hand at Skypeing, since the youngest of the clan lives in Japan with his wife and two sons.  So, even though she bothers her sons, daughters and grandchildren for help in getting things done, there is no moss growing on my Mom technology wise.  Her cell phone is even nicer than mine!

I didn't forget my Dad today.  I took him my ARC of Lost in Shangri-La by Mitchell Zuckoff. I want to read the book myself but I got caught up in Radio Shangri-La by Lisa Napoli which is a slimmer book and has gotten a lot of attention in the enewsletters I read.  I am quite taken by memoirs of people who are younger than I.  Hmmm, just wait til they get to be MY age - or better yet, my mother's age.  They'll have stories to tell then.

At Story FUSION, this past Spring, there was an opportunity for people to record their life stories on DVD.  I think we called it Life Stories.  I was too busy being a volunteer. to take advantage of it.  Next year, I think I'm going to drag my Mom and Dad into the booth and get some of their tales down.  My Dad's a willing raconteur. Telemarketers should know better than to call him, because he will ask them how they feel about religion or politics and before you know it 20 minutes have passed.  He got a call from the Republican party - of which he is a member - while I was there one day and after waiting ten minutes for him to get off the phone I just waved good-bye and left.  He was still giving that man a piece of his mind.  It's a wonder he has any pieces left the way he hands them out left and right.

My Mom on the other hand has trouble getting a word in edgewise.  But as they grow older she has been speaking up.  "Oh we've heard that story a dozen times," she tells my Dad, not that any of us expect that it will make any difference.  And she says it with a smile and he rarely takes offense.

I once went to a talk on How to Be Happy.  There were seven rules and the first one was:  Have Happy Parents.  I got that rule down pat.  Happy Birthday, Mom.  Here's hoping you get to have a bunch more.

Saturday was not a good mommy moment for me. Another #mommyfail to add to my long lists of #mommyfails.

So this past Saturday after my husband leaves for work (yes on a Saturday! But we wont get into that in this post) I decide to take kids for a donut run.

Donuts + kids = happy times. Right? WRONG! Donut + kids = Disaster waiting to happen.

Let me set it up for you (Insert great character tip: you must get the reader to sympathize with your Main Character so they care about the story and stick with them even when they do things the reader may not like)

Background/History
My kids have been out of camp for a couple weeks. After an exhausting week at LA, my dad had major surgery and my daughter was out of camp the same week. We had to get her ready for school and then my son was out all last week. Meanwhile, I am fighting a cold and my hubby was working long hours so there was no reprieve. Needless to say, I started to feel my kids were slowing picking away at my armor, my invisible force field. arguing, complaining, tired.

Mommy Offense #1 Lacking in necessary equipment
Now for the record, I do not have the latest model in Mommy Force Fields. I have a very old model that has been banged on, torn at, and picked at. So there are hairline cracks, yes it is my fault I have not upgraded to the newest and latest model.

Though I have seen some woman who have them and I envy the capabilities: The 24/7 smile feature, The nothing cracks me feature, the one that gives 100% patience guarantee, the one that can lasts for over 5000 meltdowns while doing a million chores.

The MFF 5000 (Mommy ForceField 5000).

No, I have the one that was on Clearance a few years ago b/c I could not afford a new one. The used model. The FF100.

You see where I am going.(do you sympathize with yet?)

Offense #2 - Giving 6 and 3 year old Choices they are not equipped to handle
I asked 2 innocent children the age old question that seems to cause controversy even in adults: Dunkin Donuts or Krispy Kreme?

I have realized since this Episode that I give my kids waaaaaaaay to many choic

I have never been someone who thought I would be great at being a mom. And since I've had kids, I'm sure other would say my #mommyfails are off the charts.

1) Patience of a Saint? #mommyfail! I have no patience. I'm the person who pops the toast early.

2) Craft Mom? #mommyfail! I am soooooooo not crafty. To me, using a crayon is an art. This includes sewing buttons, hemming, making American Girl clothes. Nuttin honey!

3) Kids are the center of my world? #mommyfail! Yes, I can be a bit self-centered. It's just now, it's with a kid. I go to story time at B&N so I can look at books in the kid section while my kids listen to other people read. I'm still working on it.

4) Mommy Speak? #mommyfail! I don't enjoy talking about my kids all day, every day. Really I don't. And, when I go out with my friends, I don't want to hear about their friends kids even more. I dont' want to compare nap schedules, poop routines, and discipline techniques from Supernanny.

5) Mommy and Me? #mommyfail! I do not attend these classes. One because on a grammar level - its just plain wrong. Two - I do not like to sing in large groups. Three, they lie - it is not just Mommy and me - its 20 other mommies and their 20 kids. I prefer to conduct my own classes at home. Cheaper and quieter. I heard once that the class should be changed to: "Scared Sh*tless women who have kids and are going out of their freaking' minds so they need to get out of the house before they go certifiably nuts" class. Wait, maybe that's too long for a brochure.

7) Mommy clothes? #mommyfail! I've never bought into mommy jeans, mommy hair cuts, and mommy stores. Excuse me but I don't want to LOOK like I haven't had sex in a couple months. Whether I have or not.

8) Hot mamma? #mommyfail! I'd like to think I've "still got it" and maybe to my husband I still do. But at for drinks, going to concerts, I realize the phrases like MILF and "hot mama," do not apply to me. Being a mommy is only sexy to us and our husbands. And that might only be b/c we take care of their kids so they pretend we're as hot as we used to be.

Now don't go calling DFAX.

I feed my kids. Even if it is from a microwave.

I pack their lunch. Even if it is a lunchable.

I read them books. Even if it is the same one every night.

I bathe them. Even if it is every OTHER night.

I sacrifice writing, sleep, and exercise to make sure they are happy. Even though I may grumble about it sometimes.

But I love my kids more than my life. I mean, I've given it up, haven't I? ;)

Besides, if any of you tried to harm them, I would personally gouge your heart out with my son's Elmo knife and serve it on my daughter's Dora plate.

See? I'm a good mommy.

Who says these things are all #mommyfails??

So #mommyfail or not.

I have realized I cannot let others tells me what a #mommysuccess looks like.

Except my kids :)