I lowered my candle to show him a small dark hole cut into the wall, just above the plateway. He clung to me harder, making me feel awful about leaving him. His mum couldn’t afford to buy him a candle. When I left him, he would be alone in the dark. I found the bit of rope tied to a hook on the door. Wrapping it round his small fingers, I managed to be free of him.
‘Hold on tight to that. Don’t lose the rope or you won’t find it again in the dark. Then you won’t be able to let the drivers through your door. You’ll be shouted at and thumped.’
‘Dunna go, Josh,’ he said, so quietly I could hardly hear him. Seeing him crouched in the hole made me feel bad.
‘I have to, Billy, but I’ll be back with Drummer. You’ll have the other lads to talk to when they come through your door. You won’t be that long on your own, I promise. I’ll come for you when it’s time to have a bite to eat.’ I wondered if his mum had given him food or anything to drink. I thought I’d share what Mum had given me. Then I realised I’d left my cannikin in the wagon at the pit bottom cave and cursed my luck.‘You wunna forget me, Josh?’ he whispered.
‘Of course not, now you know what to do – you’ve worked as a trapper for a long time. You’re an old hand, just like the men. Remember to keep your door closed till you hear the pony and wagons coming along. Then let it shut after them when they’re through.’ I tried to think of something to say to cheer him up. ‘You’ve the most important job in the mine, Billy. The men need you to keep the air going round the tunnels – so gas doesn’t blow them to pieces. Don’t you go sleeping and fall on the plateway or the wagons will run over you.’
‘Will the rats get me?’ he whispered.
‘Of course they won’t. They’re more scared of you than you are of them.’
He started to whimper again, so I said desperately, ‘Keep tight hold of that marble, don’t lose it. Tomorrow we’ll go down to the old clay pit. I’ll learn you to swim. You’d like that wouldn’t you?’
‘Promise?’ he begged.
I spat on my thumb. ‘I wet my finger, I wipe it dry, I cut my throat, if I tell a lie.’ I held up my candle so he could see what I was doing and ran my thumb across my throat. He nodded and giggled and I left him holding onto the rope with one hand and clutching the marble in the other.
9 Comments on Candle Dark - Friday Excerpt - 06/09/2013 - Carole Anne Carr, last added: 9/15/2013
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What a wonderful scene full of voice and heart. Really well done. :)
I simply love this!
You are a wonderful writer!
And many thanks for the kind words, they mean so much!
Have a great weekend.
Margie
x
I concur. Your excerpt is wonderful, Carole. My heart went out to the little fellow. The voice and the dialogue are so appealing and so real. I loved it.
Hi I am your newest follower and I also followed your blog, bringing you to an even 300 :D
Lainy http://www.alwaysreading.net
You create your characters with such compassion and understanding. I want to grab the little fella and bring him home.
Hi Carole-Anne .. certainly mesmerising .. I feel for him, and so hope he'll be alright and will learn to swim! Have some pleasure ..
Great excerpt .. cheers Hilary
What a fantastic excerpt! I got so wrapped up in this. Well done!
loved this piece, intensity of childhood drama and taking care of each other ending in a reassuring promise! great writing!
and love your fanciful blog art!
Dear Carole,
And further proof, with the vivid imagery of your words, that your stories are suitable for children of all ages.
I get the feeling that things will go swimmingly.
Hugs,
Gary x