Hi there!

Well gosh where to start, so many things have happened that I don't think I can squeeze it all in without rambling! Probably should start with some good news we will soon have a new addition to our family! and no its not a dog or a cat and yes it is a BABY!!!!
Which was a surprise but a exciting one! and with it comes a funny story, believe it or not it was Blake who told me I was pregnant. We were having cuddles on the couch one day back in April and he was rubbing my tummy and he said ''Mummy you have a baby in your tummy'' I laughed and said no Blake but he insisted I was and we all had a giggle and Tia joined in teasing me too. I shrugged it off and told Chris later on in the evening... to which he replied ''maybe hes like his mother!'' I thought about what he had said and did think I had been incredibly tired lately so I took a test bout week or so later and could not believe it when it came back positive!!! Blake had been right....

Again it's been a struggle I am now 22 weeks and have been in and out of hospital having blood tests every week due to my Obstetric Colostasis. I had started itching early again so told the midwife at my 12 week scan. It was inevitable I would get it again and it was confirmed at 21 weeks so I have been put on medication to help protect the baby from stillbirth. The run up to my 20 week can was very stressful I was so nervous about it, but I didn't have that feeling I had when I was pregnant with Blake, but even so my hands were shaking when I went into the scan room.
I was feeling quite emotional so I was glad the children were at school for this one but they did both attend our 12 week scan which they found fascinating...
The sonographer could see I was stressed and asked why, so we explained about Blake and my last pregnancy she was very understanding and told us not to worry and she would check as best she could for us.

She did a detailed check of the baby, and zoomed into check the baby's lip, she told us she could not detect a cleft and that from her point of view the lip was OK, we could see on the large screen as she was showing us, I did become a little teary knowing this child wont have to go through what Blake has fills me with relief having to watch your child go through so much is heart wrenching. the sonographer said she could not comment on the palate as they cant tell from a normal scan. So we will just have to wait and see at the time of birth, but if it happens we can get through it with out a doubt.

I have to go back for scans and bloods now at 24, 28, 32 and 36 weeks to check the baby is OK.Its highly likely I will be induced early, so were looking at another January Baby. So I will be back at Salisbury hospital on the 23rd October for my 24 week scan. This pregnancy has been very different from my last two, I have not had any sickness which has been fantastic to be honest,  but its not perfect I have been so ill and seem to be catching every virus going so no pregnancy glow unfortunately! stress doesn't help and there's a lot going around within our families, My mums not very well so we will be going to see her this October half term. Tia and Blake are really looking forward to that! hopefully we will get to see family and friends!

Anyway enough about me lets here a bit about our gorgeous Blake who has changed so much and come n in leaps and bounds over the past few months! hes like a proper little dude now! absolutely loves anything to do with superheroes, ninja turtles and lego! he had a fantastic 4th birthday with a Batman theme! he loved the cake I made him too, and of course he was dressed as the dark knight himself.. everyone had a fantastic time. He made a strong group of friends at pre school and they all attended the party so he was very happy.

So as you know when you turn 4 before September that only means one thing right! yes BIG SCHOOL!!!
Blake was accepted to Wincanton primary and now goes to school with Tia! I must say hes doing fabulous I had no major problems taking him in on his first half day we went into class found his peg to hang his coat and put his juice cup away in the tray! he was a little nervous so I stayed for about ten minutes till he choose an activity then I sneaked out the door. They start off with half days to settle in for a couple of weeks, then they stay till lunch then its full days, Blake seemed to cope really well. Some parents feel sad when there children start big school but all I can honestly say is I felt so so proud of him, all the issues I was told he might have due to his condition and he has proved everyone wrong! he's great at making friends, his speech is good considering the whole of his mouth was affected by his cleft. He is super confident  and has a brilliant imagination. Don't get me wrong hes not perfect, he can be a cheeky monkey at times but my god does he make me laugh! and when he says ''MUMMY YOUR THE BEST COOKER EVER'' after dinner time well what can I say apart from....
''go get your pudding then''  I love my children and cant wait for the new addition the question on everyone's lips is will it be  GIRL or a BOY?? acording to Blake its a Boy !! will he be right again.

We unfortunatly have has so sadness over the summer holidays which has had a massive impact on our family sadly our beautiful Candy had to be put to sleep as she became very unwell and there was nothing the vet could do to help her, she was found to have tumors in her spleen which had viciously spread very quickly to her liver. We had to tell the kids that Candy was very poorly and might not get better. When we got that phone call from the vet it broke our heats candy has been with us since Tia was a baby. Chris and I made the decision to go and put her to sleep, when we got there she came straight to me,  I could see she was in so much pain, but she wanted me to make one last fuss of her then she got up and got back in the create. The vet asked if we wanted to be there while the put her to sleep  for me it was an easy answer as they was no way I would leave her and she passed away in my arms. We all miss her terribly and telling the children was just awful. We have had her cremated and that way the children know shes in a way still with us.

Gosh feeling quite emotional now but to end this post on a positive note we have has some good news also!
I passed my driving test in the summer holidays and I just know my Auntie Dawn was with me in the back seat that day! We currently have Auntie Clare visiting which has been a god send to me with me being so ill.
Chris has also had a work promotion too! so lots of things have been happening. This year has flown by and it will be Christmas in the blink of an eye! one of the things I am really looking forward to is the School Christmas play I wonder how Blake will do !!
Don't worry I will keep you posted!

Thank you for reading!

lots of love
Mummypig.

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Hello Everyone

Firstly I would like to wish everyone a Happy New year, and hope you all had a fabulous Christmas. It has been a few months since my last post and its been pretty busy with the obvious build up to Christmas, I got my two to write a little letter to Santa and told them both they could ask for three items that they really want!
Tia wanted a new Tiny tears, Sky high Tink and Snow globe maker. Blake told me he really really wanted a giant Spiderman! Buzz Lightyear and a new toy moter bike. Seemed easy enough to me thank god, I am pretty organized when it comes to Christmas, I like to get a bargain so I will source for the best price! This year we were again unable to visit family and friends in Yorkshire so it was just us again but we will probably be visiting in February in the school holidays something to look forward too.

Something very unexpected happened before Christmas which was quite a surprise for me and my family! My Half sister got in touch! Whom I have not seen in 16 years although our first meeting was for only 20 mins and was the first time we met. We discovered we have been living 43 minutes away from each other! It has been a lot to take in and has been very emotional, but we have lots to catch up on and we are very similar and been through similar experiences, a pleasant surprise to learn I was a Auntie! to four gorgeous girls and two boys four of them are teenagers now, so I feel a little sad I have missed out on them growing up, but we cant control the past its the future that matters and its great for the children to have gained family. It has been great getting to know each other and was lovely to have them all over for Christmas day evening!
Tia and Blake got to meet their new cousins!

At the beginning of November I met up with a lovely Lady whom is also a mother of a Cleft child We live close but in separate villages her Daughter is at grammar school and doing very well! it makes me feel good to talk and meet with others that are able to understand what we have to go through. We had a great conversation and the second time we met I got to met her beautiful Daughter and she got to meet Blake I feel I have made a good friend! so thank you Pippa for joining me for coffee :) its important to have support and someone to talk to. There has been lots of debating on the Cleft lip & Palate group, which I think is good people should be aloud an opinion but people need to remember not everyone feels the same way everyone is different but we are all going through the same and we need each other :)

Blake's been doing good at pre school and made lots and lots of friends he even has made a best friend called finn I think its mainly they have the same interest and love for Marvel and Disney Cars they are both very cute! I love that his pre school do long observations and write everything down Blake's had a few reviews and I know he his progressing normally just like any other child and developing well and getting on with other children hes super confident and interacts well with his peers. He brought home a lovely Christmas card that they all made a foot print and to hand prints to create a reindeer image it looks fab and they were turned into real cards! I was impressed. I also filled in the online form for Primary school application!!! I cant believe my Blake starts school soon!!! He is ready for it don't know if I am..... where did my baby go?

We have managed to dodge most of the horrible bugs and viruses going round this winter, but me and Chris got a nasty virus that laid us both out for a whole day... I got it first then Chris few weeks later, Blake was lucky I don't think he caught it it is sometimes hard to tell with Blake he seems to just get on with it... but I think he would have told us if he had it. not so much as a sniffle in the house! I though yes nobody is ill for Christmas, Silly me I thought too soon.

Tuesday before Christmas Eve we had to go into Salisbury to pick up gifts for our Friends Children, that morning Tia came and told me she had a headache, I asked if she felt ill and she said no it was just a headache, so I got the kids breakfast and drinks, Tia seemed fine after that I assumed she must have been hungry and maybe dehydrated. We got ready to go out we arrived at Salisbury and went straight to Smyths Toy store, Tia helped me pick the presents but by the time we got back to the car she said her head hurt again poor Tia I told Chris I would get her some Calpol from town as we needed few more bits, so we got everything we needed and headed home Tia said she felt better and she helped me wrap up the gifts!

We decided to go take the girts to our friends then get back and have Dinner, on our second visit Tia didn't seem well I took her temp and it was normal but she was shivering and then sick :(  We thought it best to go home, five minutes from leaving my friends I heard a noise and turned round and saw Tia having a fit in the back of the car, I screamed at Chris to stop the car, ran to her, I wasn't sure and though maybe she had been sick and was chocking, so checked her air way there was no sick she was having some sort of fit, I was terrified, Chris rang 999 and Tia must have been fitting for 20 mins when she stopped its like she wasn't even there there are no words that can express how I was feeling.We just kept shouting her name to keep her awake. Poor Blake saw it all and he was very scared for his sister, thankfully a lady stopped to help and she kept Blake talking and kept his focus on her and not what was going on in the back of the car.

When the ambulance arrived they took her and put her in the back, took her temperature and it was over 40 nearly 41c so it had rapidly spiked in the five minutes from leaving our friends, they suspected a febrile convulsion and assured me she was going to be OK, but were going to take her in as the said she could have a viral infection. Chris took Blake to our friends house, we thought it would be better as we didn't get our dinner and new he would be hungry. It took Tia a couple of hours to finally come round, and the first thing she said was ''Mummy has Santa been?'' bless her she didn't remember any of it, what a blessing! the took us to Sarum ward in Salisbury hospital..... Strange thing was we were meant to be there with Blake on that day for the his second lip surgery that was cancelled. I didn't sleep well.

We got the all clear as Tia was doing well the next day the Doctor told us it could happen again if she gets a high temp or it might not ever happen, so we will have to keep eyes on her if she becomes ill again and she even got a visit from Father Christmas and his elves!! we all got a gift as well Blake could not believe it! he talked about it all day long Tia was discharged, so we went home to celebrate Christmas Eve, We got Santa's pie and drink ready and Rudolph's carrot! Tia and Blake scattered Reindeer food on the garden path and had hot chocolate before bed. We were all worn out so getting them off to bed was no trouble.

Christmas Day was Brilliant and the kids really enjoyed and loved there gifts and they got what they wanted from Santa ;) We got Blake a bumble bee transformer car don't think its left his side he loves it ! My sister came round that evening which was great she gave me a cuddle needed after everything. kids enjoyed seeing their cousins again and Blake was impressed with his new batman costume! Tia got Anna's coronation dress she looks beautiful in it and looked like a princess.

So this next year is hopefully going to be great, new family members, new friends, new adventures for the kids! fingers crossed. I would just like to say Thank you to the Lady that stopped and helped us we never got her name! and Thank you to Vicki and David and the girls for seeing in he New Year with us!

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Hello Everyone!


Yesterday we had some fantastic new! We had an appointment with the cleft team to discuss Blake's next surgery. We decided on this at the previous appointment as I wanted to be absolutely sure the surgery was needed. So we set off to Salisbury hospital to meet Mr Cadier, got there a little late, but it was quite busy in the waiting room, Blake is more aware now when he is going to the hospital and kept saying he didn't want to see the doctors, but he was alright after I explained it was just a quick visit and that they were not going to be looking at his ears this time.

We didn't have to wait to long before Nicola (our cleft nurse) came to call us through, it's odd as I always feel a little nervous at that point but its something I cant really explain. Blake was nice and calm so he didn't seem worried at all. He sat on my knee in the room while Mr Cadier had a look at his lip, Straight away he told us he didn't think the surgery was necessary! that his lip looked great, he asked whether people commented or noticed, but in all honesty I don't get many comments anymore people don't usually see the scar although it more prominent in the winter time, not many people notice unless we point it out. Mr Cadier said his lip had definitely settled down since we last discussed the surgery option last year which was my initial thought and what a relief. Looks like its all gravy!

So it looks like Blake will be having Christmas dinner after all! :)

I am so glad we had this meeting, it would have been awful to wait till Christmas then find out it wasn't needed so lots of stress and worry avoided We have a fantastic Cleft team and appreciate them arranging this meeting for us. Mr Cadier said he will see Blake next when he is 5 year old and then see how his face has changed as to whether he needs the surgery later, which is a possibility.

I am so pleased he doesn't have to go through this surgery so close to Christmas... It wouldn't have been much fun for him and we all want our children to be happy as it is the season to be jolly!!
All I can do know is watch him grow and keep my eye on his ears for any ear infections and watch and listen to his speech for any changes, Blake has a great key worker at his pre-school watching over him so I will have help regarding this which is great. So far he is really enjoying his time away from Mummy he's making new friends and learning new things. I find myself feeling a little lost! I have been told he is very confident and I cant tell you how proud this makes me feel.

I look forward to writing my next post :) goodbye for now !

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Hello everyone! its been a while since my last post! I do apologize It has been an incredibly busy few months. We had a visit to Yorkshire in February and ended up bringing my brother down for a while, which the kids loved! they really put Uncle John through the mill he became a human climbing frame, l but he didn't seem to mind. My brother is a fantastic cook and while he was down really helped me out, it was good having someone to talk and felt like we had some quality time as brother and sister its hard being so far away from family and friends I cant tell you what a joy it was to see my children bond with there Uncle. I was pretty sad when he decided to go back to Yorkshire few months later, but I am sure he will come visit again the kids really miss him, the other day Tia made me laugh ''Mummy I really miss Uncle John, but not his spicy curry.''

February was full of highs and lows one of my good friends passed away suddenly which came as a huge shock to everyone and she will be sadly missed she was a great support while I was pregnant with Blake.
Her family put on a beautiful service and I met some of her relatives and even bumped into 'Aunt Sally' who was my Auntie Dawns sister in law :( she said ''Jemma we must stop meeting like this'' I couldn't agree more.
So I would just like to say R.I.P Sandra I will think of you often xxxx

I must say Blake's words and sentences have been coming along beautifully hes doing so well, Tia has been a great help with this as shes really enjoying school. He likes to listen to her read her school books at bedtime.
His favorite book at the moment is The Gruffilo I think he likes the different accents that I do for the characters I am rather impressed with my SSSssssnake, SSSssssoooo SSSsssscary.
Blake's personality has dramatically changed since my last post he is a proper boy I blame Uncle John .... letting him watch Power Rangers HAHA.. Hes totally besotted with super hero's now Spiderman, Batman anything Marvel, but he also loves Scooby Doo, Bob the builder and Fire man Sam!

So as it was coming up to Blake's 3rd Birthday!! I know I cant believe where the times gone either, I needed a idea for his party I wasn't sure I could top the Mr Potato head theme. We decided to hire a bigger space this year as its just so hard having it at home, We got a fab place called Just dance studio where Tia goes to ballet, its such a brilliant space and there a gorgeous garden area which is an incredible space, so we decided on a Teddy bears picnic, We also thought a bouncy castle would really entertain the children which Uncle John paid for as his gift to Blake. I have to say it was a fantastic day. Blake had a great turnout its always a great time to see friends, we catered ourselves and I made the birthday cake with a teddy bear theme.

I cant tell you how stressed I was that day, I think I may have been over compensating... as I know that Blake is due his second lip op and this time he will be aware of whats going on. That a side all in all it was my favorite party yet. The kids slept very well that night :) We had Blake's party on the Saturday his birthday was on the 17th June he was pretty happy with his presents, especially the Scooby doo & batman DVD, We got him a new scooter as well his face was a picture.

Last year Chris took the kids to buy a tent on one of the days I went to visit my Auntie Dawn, they were not able to visit her in hospital as she was on a secure ward. I told her what they were up to she thought it was a great idea, we talked about when we went to Weymouth when we were little, which was one of the best holidays I  had as a child. We didn't go camping that summer. :( with her and my Uncle passing we wouldn't have enjoyed it.

I was thinking about her one evening and remembered we had bought the tent So me and Chris thought lets give camping a go only for one night just to see if the kids liked it, and if so we could go somewhere in the summer holidays! thankfully it went down really well and we booked 4 nights in Cornwall in Looe Bay, Mum used to tell me when I was little that she went there on holiday there as a child, and we thought what a great place to go in memory of Auntie Dawn, as our holiday was on the anniversary of her passing.

Unfortunately the weather wasn't looking great for the holiday as we were getting the aftermath from Hurricane Bertha! but we decided to still go rain or shine... and Bertha.  It took about hour and a half to get the tent up the wind was crazy! Mum was right it was a beautiful place, we were even staying at the campsite they went to as children. It was quite busy lots of people around we took Blake swimming for the first time and I was impressed he loved it! We have a pool up the road so I think ill have to take him up there to see if we ave a fish in the family!



We went into Looe and looked around the shops, had the most amazing fish and chips, and walked to the beach, the weather was rather disappointing on the Monday and Tuesday but we made the best of it,  Tia and Blake made some friends on the last day, Angel and Harvey they were lovely and the weather took a turn for the better, I think Auntie Dawn was looking down on us, We decided to go to another beach area called Tallard Bay and it turned out Angel and Harvey were going too. When we found a spot to sit I pondered on what I could do to honor my Auntie Dawn as it was a year ago that day since we lost her. we decided to write her name in the sand and took a picture. It was a camping holiday to remember bring on next year!!



We have been home a week or so now, and the summer holidays are nearly over! This September Blake starts Pre-School, So this week I arranged his settling in days for this week. He has had his first session he was quite excited in the morning but when Me and Tia were going to leave he was a little unsure, so we had to sneak out when he wasn't looking. Me and Tia had some girly time and I treated her to chocolate milkshake at one of the local cafe's I didn't want to go to far away silly really... its hard to let go isn't it? I am actually glad I had Tia with me, I think it will be odd when he goes in September full time what will I do??? he isn't a baby anymore he's a little dude with a cool hair cut :)

Today we went to Salisbury Hospital Blake's 3 year check, it went pretty well, but he really wasn't happy about having anyone looking in his ears he thought it was going to hurt bless him ! We were a little late so someone went in before us so Blake and Tia got to sample the new play area while we waited. Now that Blake is three we had to go somewhere different for his hearing test, so that also meant a new nurse, Blake was a little anxious at first and didn't want to co-operate at first, till she got the new game out! he sat on Chris's knee, for the test he had put something in a tub every time he heard the noise he did well, and I think he won the nurse over with his cheeky grin :) he even let her test his ears at the end with a special machine.

Next we went on to Speech therapy unit, We saw Mr Geyer who is Blake's ENT Consultant We discussed the hearing test and his future options and we both agreed that at this time we feel hes doing well even though he still has fluid in his left ear its worth waiting to see what happens with the glue ear, currently his speech isn't so much being affected by this, Me and Chris as his parents think Blake's coming along very well with his speech, words and sentences this is something we are constantly on top of and we tend to notice when things change, cant tell you all how proud I am of Blake and it just goes to show you your child having a cleft is not the end of the world! there is light at the end of the tunnel.

We have been on Mr Cadier's waiting list for a year now and still haven't received an appointment so Mr Geyer went to have this addressed this with the Cleft team, while we saw the speech therapist  Blake was great and again she was happy with Blake and said she did not feel he needed to see anyone regarding speech outside of the hospital, but obviously if we has any worries to contact her and the team for advice or a meeting. We then saw out Cleft nurse Nicola who has been with us from the get go, shes brilliant its always so nice to see her she is part of our secure cleft bubble she is fantastic with Blake. She has told us that there are two possible op dates available one in November and another in December! the thing is one is with a new surgeon Marc Swan (awesome name by the way) or Mr Cadier and our first choice is Mr Cadier for obvious reasons only thing is the dates 23rd December ......

AND breath....... not to worry I'm pretty organized :) but does that mean Blake cant eat Christmas dinner? I will have to ask in the next meeting on the 10th September it's always GO GO GO GO.... in our house.

P.S Chris and I had our 1st wedding anniversary in May :)
and I celebrated my 30th Birthday with friend and family!!

So guys my next post will be then !! as Dora says from Nemo...

''keep on swimming keep on swimming''

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Hello everyone! Firstly I would like to say....

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Hi there everyone! So we are now all hold the same name!! We are the Fenton's, Our Wedding Day was amazing! something we will always remember and treasure thank you to everyone that attended our special day and a massive thank you to my bridesmaids you all looked beautiful. We had a wonderful Honeymoon in Tunisia for a week my parents had Tia and Blake after we jetted off the day after the wedding, Mum and Dad took them to Yorkshire, and my brother John stayed at our house to look after the animals. It was a lovely break and the weather was amazing, we ate till we were stuffed, sunbathed by the pool ( and got very burnt) walked along the beach and even went on a camel.... which for me wasn't the best experience as I was thrown onto the camel's hump and on that hump I stayed.. I had quite a sore bottom for a few days lol.

I actually started to find being away from the children quite hard and was missing them terribly.
When we got home we had a day before setting up to Yorkshire to get Tia and Blake, so we spent the day sleeping. When we got to Yorkshire we found out that the kids had been ill most of the week, they had both had the sickness bug going around so we were disappointed they had not had the holiday they were looking forward too, my mum said  'don't worry we had them at there worst and we coped, we didn't want you to worry while you were on honeymoon'  We could only stay for a couple of days because we had to get back, Blake had a check up with the Cleft team and Mr Cadier at the end of May. We tried to make the most of the time up there, when we got back home and sat down the realization sank in that we got married!!!

Mr & Mrs Fenton 18th May 2013

There was more planning to be done after the wedding! and that was for Blake's 2nd Birthday!! We decided to have a party at home as funds were limited after the wedding of the year! :) We decided on a Mr Potato Head theme as Blake loves Toy Story at the moment and he loves his Mr potato head, the party rule was 'Everyone must be donning a Mustache!!'
Chris sister (Auntie Clare) came down from Yorkshire just for the special occasion! I think she rather suits a mustache, she looks brilliant and she was a great help on the day she so good with the kids, I couldn't ask for a better sister in law! Thank you Clare :)
I must say it was a fantastic day and everyone joined in and there was lots of laughs and there were quite a few guests which made it so much fun. Thank you to everyone that came! Cant believe my little man  is 2 years old already.

Happy 2nd Birthday Blake! Love you lots

Although we are now a complete family unit and in the early stages of being married, things have started off on a very sad note, just before the Wedding we found out that my Auntie Dawn had Leukemia again, she fought and beat this when she was just 26 and whilst caring for my Uncle Bob who was battling cancer also this came as a massive blow to our family. If you have read my blog before you may remember it was my Auntie Dawn who I rang for Advice after I had my 20 week scan, she was one of the first people I told about Blake's Cleft lip & Palate. I felt totally gutted and angry that this could happen to two of the most amazing people I know.

Blake's Hospital appointment came and we set off to Salisbury to meet with the cleft team. It went really well, but I expressed my concerns about Blake's hearing as he had stopped pronouncing his T's and D's he has started saying 'ere' instead of  'Tia' and 'goggy' instead of 'doggy'  I was worried his hearing had got worse and wasn't improving. We had his ears checked and fluid could still be seen which meant he still had glue ear I asked if we could arrange a follow up hearing test as I thought his hearing maybe the reason to his change in speech and everyone agreed, Mr Cadier suggested that if Blake needs grommets fitted he would probably put his second lip surgery forward and do it at the same time, (they want to level the back of the top lip) that way he only goes under anesthetic the once.

The speech therapist suggested we go in the next room and have a chat with Blake to see where he was at. She picked up on the same things we had. So an appointment was made to see one of her team to assess Blake and how he was doing. We treated the kids to lunch in Salisbury all in all it was a good day. A week later we got an appointment to see the speech therapist, we were not expecting it so quick, Blake did really well in the appointment she gave him lots of items to play with and he showed understanding of what they were and what they were used for......' I think she was pleased with his progress and maybe a little impressed with him.' he liked her tractor best !!! He can defiantly say tractor  lol She told us she will hopefully refer us to a speech therapist in our area for further help with his speech development. We are still waiting for the hearing test its been a few months now so we will have to chase it up.

The week after me and Chris arranged to go see my Auntie Dawn she was under going chemotherapy at Basingstoke hospital. My Cousin Leeann had the kids for me, Leeann is my Auntie Dawn's Daughter who I really look up to and admire she is also amazing! Tia couldn't wait to see little Holly! but Tia wanted to visit Auntie Dawn too but we had to explain that  she was not aloud in as she was in a special room. We set off to see her she was located on the Wessex Ward, it was great to see her we told her about Blake's appointments, She was always interested to hear about Blake's progress, She thanked me for the photo and Wedding cake, we had given them to my mum to give her as she couldn't make the Wedding, My Wedding photographer (Lorraine Hunter) took a special picture and had it printed while were were having photos on Gold Hill in Shaftesbury, The shop was closed and the owner opened to have it printed just for her. (nobody new that till now!)

My Auntie Dawn was very down she hadn't seen my Uncle Bob for weeks and was really missing him, the nurse came in as we were there and said that she could go see him that day, me and Chris offered to take her there and then so she would have more time with him and they agreed, we took her home. My Uncle Bob looked very different it was a shock to be honest, it was the first time I had seen him since he had been diagnosed the year before, but I went over and gave him a big kiss on the check, We chatted for a while then we got ready to go we wanted them to have time alone, Uncle Bob thanked us for bringing her to see him....I said 'uncle bob it was an honor' and it really was I have never know such love they have been married for 36 years and never been apart.  I left with a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. That was the last time I saw my Uncle Bob.

He passed away on the 17th July 2013. My Auntie Dawn and her family gave him a wonderful send off. It was quite hard to see so many people in so much pain. Auntie Dawn had been under going a second round of chemotherapy. It had not worked, this was bad news the whole family was devastated. Auntie Dawn was a fighter She was so strong a real inspiration she also new her own mind and what she wanted.

Two weeks after my Uncle's funeral The Heart of our entire family  Dawn Frost passed away in her home after contracting pneumonia. Devastated is not big enough an emotion to describe the loss of such a beautiful person. My cousins and there children gave her a wonderful send off she would be so proud. I know I am,
I love them all so so much.
Family is so important so is life. I hope our marriage and life is as full just like their's was. It was real love, it was not perfect, but there was Happiness , Sadness, Laughter, Hope, Joy, Fun, and most importantly full of Love.
So I must thank my Husband for all his support these last few months, for the tears, anger, regret, and stress I have caused. You are amazing and I love you.
                                       
                                       

Dawn Frost

Together Forever.

If you would like to make a donation to macmillan or Cancer Research please click on the link below
http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Home.aspx

http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/home/

Thanks x

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Hi there everyone! So we are now all hold the same name!! We are the Fenton's, Our Wedding Day was amazing! something we will always remember and treasure thank you to everyone that attended our special day and a massive thank you to my bridesmaids you all looked beautiful. We had a wonderful Honeymoon in Tunisia for a week my parents had Tia and Blake after we jetted off the day after the wedding, Mum and Dad took them to Yorkshire, and my brother John stayed at our house to look after the animals. It was a lovely break and the weather was amazing, we ate till we were stuffed, sunbathed by the pool ( and got very burnt) walked along the beach and even went on a camel.... which for me wasn't the best experience as I was thrown onto the camel's hump and on that hump I stayed.. I had quite a sore bottom for a few days lol.

I actually started to find being away from the children quite hard and was missing them terribly.
When we got home we had a day before setting up to Yorkshire to get Tia and Blake, so we spent the day sleeping. When we got to Yorkshire we found out that the kids had been ill most of the week, they had both had the sickness bug going around so we were disappointed they had not had the holiday they were looking forward too, my mum said  'don't worry we had them at there worst and we coped, we didn't want you to worry while you were on honeymoon'  We could only stay for a couple of days because we had to get back, Blake had a check up with the Cleft team and Mr Cadier at the end of May. We tried to make the most of the time up there, when we got back home and sat down the realization sank in that we got married!!!

Mr & Mrs Fenton 18th May 2013

There was more planning to be done after the wedding! and that was for Blake's 2nd Birthday!! We decided to have a party at home as funds were limited after the wedding of the year! :) We decided on a Mr Potato Head theme as Blake loves Toy Story at the moment and he loves his Mr potato head, the party rule was 'Everyone must be donning a Mustache!!'
Chris sister (Auntie Clare) came down from Yorkshire just for the special occasion! I think she rather suits a mustache, she looks brilliant and she was a great help on the day she so good with the kids, I couldn't ask for a better sister in law! Thank you Clare :)
I must say it was a fantastic day and everyone joined in and there was lots of laughs and there were quite a few guests which made it so much fun. Thank you to everyone that came! Cant believe my little man  is 2 years old already.

Happy 2nd Birthday Blake! Love you lots

Although we are now a complete family unit and in the early stages of being married, things have started off on a very sad note, just before the Wedding we found out that my Auntie Dawn had Leukemia again, she fought and beat this when she was just 26 and whilst caring for my Uncle Bob who was battling cancer also this came as a massive blow to our family. If you have read my blog before you may remember it was my Auntie Dawn who I rang for Advice after I had my 20 week scan, she was one of the first people I told about Blake's Cleft lip & Palate. I felt totally gutted and angry that this could happen to two of the most amazing people I know.

Blake's Hospital appointment came and we set off to Salisbury to meet with the cleft team. It went really well, but I expressed my concerns about Blake's hearing as he had stopped pronouncing his T's and D's he has started saying 'ere' instead of  'Tia' and 'goggy' instead of 'doggy'  I was worried his hearing had got worse and wasn't improving. We had his ears checked and fluid could still be seen which meant he still had glue ear I asked if we could arrange a follow up hearing test as I thought his hearing maybe the reason to his change in speech and everyone agreed, Mr Cadier suggested that if Blake needs grommets fitted he would probably put his second lip surgery forward and do it at the same time, (they want to level the back of the top lip) that way he only goes under anesthetic the once.

The speech therapist suggested we go in the next room and have a chat with Blake to see where he was at. She picked up on the same things we had. So an appointment was made to see one of her team to assess Blake and how he was doing. We treated the kids to lunch in Salisbury all in all it was a good day. A week later we got an appointment to see the speech therapist, we were not expecting it so quick, Blake did really well in the appointment she gave him lots of items to play with and he showed understanding of what they were and what they were used for......' I think she was pleased with his progress and maybe a little impressed with him.' he liked her tractor best !!! He can defiantly say tractor  lol She told us she will hopefully refer us to a speech therapist in our area for further help with his speech development. We are still waiting for the hearing test its been a few months now so we will have to chase it up.

The week after me and Chris arranged to go see my Auntie Dawn she was under going chemotherapy at Basingstoke hospital. My Cousin Leeann had the kids for me, Leeann is my Auntie Dawn's Daughter who I really look up to and admire she is also amazing! Tia couldn't wait to see little Holly! but Tia wanted to visit Auntie Dawn too but we had to explain that  she was not aloud in as she was in a special room. We set off to see her she was located on the Wessex Ward, it was great to see her we told her about Blake's appointments, She was always interested to hear about Blake's progress, She thanked me for the photo and Wedding cake, we had given them to my mum to give her as she couldn't make the Wedding, My Wedding photographer (Lorraine Hunter) took a special picture and had it printed while were were having photos on Gold Hill in Shaftesbury, The shop was closed and the owner opened to have it printed just for her. (nobody new that till now!)

My Auntie Dawn was very down she hadn't seen my Uncle Bob for weeks and was really missing him, the nurse came in as we were there and said that she could go see him that day, me and Chris offered to take her there and then so she would have more time with him and they agreed, we took her home. My Uncle Bob looked very different it was a shock to be honest, it was the first time I had seen him since he had been diagnosed the year before, but I went over and gave him a big kiss on the check, We chatted for a while then we got ready to go we wanted them to have time alone, Uncle Bob thanked us for bringing her to see him....I said 'uncle bob it was an honor' and it really was I have never know such love they have been married for 36 years and never been apart.  I left with a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. That was the last time I saw my Uncle Bob.

He passed away on the 17th July 2013. My Auntie Dawn and her family gave him a wonderful send off. It was quite hard to see so many people in so much pain. Auntie Dawn had been under going a second round of chemotherapy. It had not worked, this was bad news the whole family was devastated. Auntie Dawn was a fighter She was so strong a real inspiration she also new her own mind and what she wanted.

Two weeks after my Uncle's funeral The Heart of our entire family  Dawn Frost passed away in her home after contracting pneumonia. Devastated is not big enough an emotion to describe the loss of such a beautiful person. My cousins and there children gave her a wonderful send off she would be so proud. I know I am,
I love them all so so much.
Family is so important so is life. I hope our marriage and life is as full just like their's was. It was real love, it was not perfect, but there was Happiness , Sadness, Laughter, Hope, Joy, Fun, and most importantly full of Love.
So I must thank my Husband for all his support these last few months, for the tears, anger, regret, and stress I have caused. You are amazing and I love you.
                                       
                                       

Dawn Frost

Together Forever.

If you would like to make a donation to macmillan or Cancer Research please click on the link below
http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Home.aspx

http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/home/

Thanks x

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Hello Everyone! well what can I say its been a few months since my last post, and I must say what a busy few months its been! There hasn't been any appointments or meeting just lots of family time. Blake has changed so much... my Baby Blake is no more :(

Blake has come leaps and bounds in a blink of an eye! he is saying lots of words and pronouncing them well, I believe his favorite word at the moment is 'doggy' every time where out and about and he see's one he points and shouts 'DOGGY' its very funny he loves walking by himself and I must say 'at the moment he is very well behaved' I though he would be a bit of a lad and run off and I would have to use the harness but he doesn't and my heart melts when he stands next to me and holds up his hand for me to take it. :)

Tia and Blake play really well together...  but they do have the occasional 'argument' and it usually involves Tia's pram.... lol
Blake gets along with other children too and interacts really well with them its lovely to watch sometimes when I tell him off he makes this little noise! sort of like a 'hummf' he doesn't like being told NO....!
It's very hard not to laugh...but hes coming up to the 'terrible two's' and he has been introduced to the naughty corner!! haha...  he is not keen so he will usually run for a cuddle to try get out of it.. very clever! but besides that hes doing brilliantly and I couldn't be more proud.

There has been lots of planning in the Fenton household as I will soon be a Fenton!!! We have been planning our wedding for a year now and its less than 6 weeks away! Tia is very excited to wear her 'princess dress' Blake will also be donning a Suit! same as Daddy....  So excited  Me and Chris have been through so much in the 7 years we have been together. I couldn't ask for a better partner, father and soon to be Husband.

We have just spent a week in Yorkshire visiting friends and family although we were snowed in for nearly half of it! I spent time with my mum and my bridesmaids at a Spa Day which was amazing! and very much needed and we went out for a meal for my Hen... Chris and his friends watched football and went for some evening drinks. I had my dress fitting and we sorted the wedding cake! all in all it was a great week.

We are going to do a bit of fundraising for CLAPA at the wedding! we will have some display pictures of Blake before and after his surgery, and a nice big bucket for or guests to donate some pennies (pounds would be better ;) but hopefully we will raise some cash and more importantly Awareness...

wedding pics to come... ! have to show Blake to you all donning his suit! would be rude not too :)

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Hello Everyone! well what can I say its been a few months since my last post, and I must say what a busy few months its been! There hasn't been any appointments or meeting just lots of family time. Blake has changed so much... my Baby Blake is no more :(

Blake has come leaps and bounds in a blink of an eye! he is saying lots of words and pronouncing them well, I believe his favorite word at the moment is 'doggy' every time where out and about and he see's one he points and shouts 'DOGGY' its very funny he loves walking by himself and I must say 'at the moment he is very well behaved' I though he would be a bit of a lad and run off and I would have to use the harness but he doesn't and my heart melts when he stands next to me and holds up his hand for me to take it. :)

Tia and Blake play really well together...  but they do have the occasional 'argument' and it usually involves Tia's pram.... lol
Blake gets along with other children too and interacts really well with them its lovely to watch sometimes when I tell him off he makes this little noise! sort of like a 'hummf' he doesn't like being told NO....!
It's very hard not to laugh...but hes coming up to the 'terrible two's' and he has been introduced to the naughty corner!! haha...  he is not keen so he will usually run for a cuddle to try get out of it.. very clever! but besides that hes doing brilliantly and I couldn't be more proud.

There has been lots of planning in the Fenton household as I will soon be a Fenton!!! We have been planning our wedding for a year now and its less than 6 weeks away! Tia is very excited to wear her 'princess dress' Blake will also be donning a Suit! same as Daddy....  So excited  Me and Chris have been through so much in the 7 years we have been together. I couldn't ask for a better partner, father and soon to be Husband.

We have just spent a week in Yorkshire visiting friends and family although we were snowed in for nearly half of it! I spent time with my mum and my bridesmaids at a Spa Day which was amazing! and very much needed and we went out for a meal for my Hen... Chris and his friends watched football and went for some evening drinks. I had my dress fitting and we sorted the wedding cake! all in all it was a great week.

We are going to do a bit of fundraising for CLAPA at the wedding! we will have some display pictures of Blake before and after his surgery, and a nice big bucket for or guests to donate some pennies (pounds would be better ;) but hopefully we will raise some cash and more importantly Awareness...

wedding pics to come... ! have to show Blake to you all donning his suit! would be rude not too :)

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Well Hello everyone and a very Happy New Year to all my followers! the start of another year and we are hoping for a good one! as the end of last year wasn't the best as I wasn't very well! and the kids have been full of colds and viruses too, but saying that we have settled into our new home and we are very comfortable here and the kids love it.

We had a great Christmas and the kids were spoilt rotten, Santa got Blake a special friend called scout! he thought that it would be a fabulous toy and would help him with his speech and interaction! and it went down very well they are good buddies already (fantastic toy which can be connected to the internet and I was able to download his favorite food, colour, songs, sounds and objects as well as his name!) Christmas was  great  because there grandparents were down as well, my Mum and Dad, which made it that bit more special as we don't get to see them very much with us living so far away, to me that was the best present and a great end to a tough year.

Blake had a good note to his end of 2012 as his 18 month check up went brilliant with the cleft team, at Salisbury Hospital, he was a big show off! and made us all laugh. Blake is now saying lots of different words and pronouncing them very well even his Sh's and Th's like shoes and there' or Theo which is defiantly his most favorite word! they asked lots of questions about Blake's habits and behavior and were pleased with our answers, especially that he's been drinking from a beaker since 9 months! they played with toys with him and he interacted well.

The speech therapist listened for words and babbling noises, he said several words in the session which was brilliant. Blake still sometimes lets his tongue pop out to the left, but they were not concerned as it doesn't affect his speech and it doesn't cause a rash or irritation I think its a concentration thing.... just something he finds comforting and will grow out of with time. We make sure we brush his teeth and that he is registered with a local dentist to make sure his teeth are OK this is very important.

Blake has a huge appetite and eats pretty much everything you give him, pasta being his favorite! which is brilliant as you can try different things he is very fond of cookies hence the post title!! I swear every time we visit someone hes straight in the kitchen waiting to be offered a biscuit ! its so funny. Gets one then toddles off..... then suddenly reappears expecting another little fatty! we do know that Blake hates the word NO!say no and then the bottom lip pops out.... but we must stay firm and think of his teeth and his pot belly and that is why we call him 'The Cookie Monster!' Personally I blame my friend Nykki who started him off on custard creams lol!

He interacts with other children brilliantly and loves playing with Tia, he's a boy though and does like a good play fight haha! I often catch them rolling around on the floor tickling and giggling, he now knows what and where his hair, nose, eyes, ears, toes, and mouth are and will point to them and hes very fond of telling us where the lights are! he understands pretty much everything we say and will bring his shoes to us when we ask and puts on his coat! he is a delight to be honest and im super duper proud!

The cleft team were very pleased with Blakes progress! and will be seeing him again when he is about 3, but were very supportive and said we can get in touch at any point if we have any concerns. We are waiting for a follow up appointment for Blakes hearing to see if there is any chance with his Glue Ear, so we will hopefully hear something soon. I don't have any concerns for Blake at this moment in time and as a mother I feel hes exceptional and bright as a button, he's always on the ball and you can see the clogs turning in his head... mainly when you can see he's up to something but that's oik us mums have eyes in the backs of our heads don't we!!

Thank you for reading :) much love to you all and happy 2013!

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Well Hello everyone and a very Happy New Year to all my followers! the start of another year and we are hoping for a good one! as the end of last year wasn't the best as I wasn't very well! and the kids have been full of colds and viruses too, but saying that we have settled into our new home and we are very comfortable here and the kids love it.

We had a great Christmas and the kids were spoilt rotten, Santa got Blake a special friend called scout! he thought that it would be a fabulous toy and would help him with his speech and interaction! and it went down very well they are good buddies already (fantastic toy which can be connected to the internet and I was able to download his favorite food, colour, songs, sounds and objects as well as his name!) Christmas was  great  because there grandparents were down as well, my Mum and Dad, which made it that bit more special as we don't get to see them very much with us living so far away, to me that was the best present and a great end to a tough year.

Blake had a good note to his end of 2012 as his 18 month check up went brilliant with the cleft team, at Salisbury Hospital, he was a big show off! and made us all laugh. Blake is now saying lots of different words and pronouncing them very well even his Sh's and Th's like shoes and there' or Theo which is defiantly his most favorite word! they asked lots of questions about Blake's habits and behavior and were pleased with our answers, especially that he's been drinking from a beaker since 9 months! they played with toys with him and he interacted well.

The speech therapist listened for words and babbling noises, he said several words in the session which was brilliant. Blake still sometimes lets his tongue pop out to the left, but they were not concerned as it doesn't affect his speech and it doesn't cause a rash or irritation I think its a concentration thing.... just something he finds comforting and will grow out of with time. We make sure we brush his teeth and that he is registered with a local dentist to make sure his teeth are OK this is very important.

Blake has a huge appetite and eats pretty much everything you give him, pasta being his favorite! which is brilliant as you can try different things he is very fond of cookies hence the post title!! I swear every time we visit someone hes straight in the kitchen waiting to be offered a biscuit ! its so funny. Gets one then toddles off..... then suddenly reappears expecting another little fatty! we do know that Blake hates the word NO!say no and then the bottom lip pops out.... but we must stay firm and think of his teeth and his pot belly and that is why we call him 'The Cookie Monster!' Personally I blame my friend Nykki who started him off on custard creams lol!

He interacts with other children brilliantly and loves playing with Tia, he's a boy though and does like a good play fight haha! I often catch them rolling around on the floor tickling and giggling, he now knows what and where his hair, nose, eyes, ears, toes, and mouth are and will point to them and hes very fond of telling us where the lights are! he understands pretty much everything we say and will bring his shoes to us when we ask and puts on his coat! he is a delight to be honest and im super duper proud!

The cleft team were very pleased with Blakes progress! and will be seeing him again when he is about 3, but were very supportive and said we can get in touch at any point if we have any concerns. We are waiting for a follow up appointment for Blakes hearing to see if there is any chance with his Glue Ear, so we will hopefully hear something soon. I don't have any concerns for Blake at this moment in time and as a mother I feel hes exceptional and bright as a button, he's always on the ball and you can see the clogs turning in his head... mainly when you can see he's up to something but that's oik us mums have eyes in the backs of our heads don't we!!

Thank you for reading :) much love to you all and happy 2013!

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Hello everyone firstly I would like to thank all the viewers and followers to this blog, I have heard it is helping many people and families that are going through the same. Blake has changed so much over the past few months, He is nearly 15 months he has become a chunky monkey and loves his food!!! so I am sure you can all guess his hard palate is healing well, although  I noticed there was still food running from his nose but I soon realised that this has happened with others as I research into it and asked many of my cleft mummy friends! It actually happens more when he has a cold! which he has had on and off he can get very snotty! I seem to go through wipes like theres no tomorrow of late.

Blake's teeth seem to be coming through with no trouble! and they are reasonably in line to his gum, It is interesting to see, his back teeth came through without me noticing! My little star is doing so well I am a very proud mummy, he loves his sister so much and follows her everywhere! but he does have that brotherly boyish behaviour where he will literally tackle her to the ground! Very funny to watch by the way... I think Tia's favorite sentence at the moment is ''Mummy Blakey's getting me again!''

So Blake's into most things now, well when I say that I don't mean toy's I mean he's into everything like cupboards, sweeping brushes, house phones, wires, 'the fish tank draw' the list is endless and yes I do go on about my perfect little man but some days I can be pulling my hair out lol. Its a given boys will be boys as the saying goes. Saying this though I do enjoy watching him toddle around looking and learning its like you can actually see the cogs turning around in his head, he is very very clever, just like his sister.. hmm.. should I be worried?

Anyway last month we have been busy moving house! planning a wedding and moving house is uber stressful! so I have put wedding plans on hold till the move is sorted. In the same month we has Blake's Hard Palate repair check up at Salisbury Hospital, which I was a little nervous about as I was worried there maybe a hole because of the food running out from his nose, Mr Cadier however said it looked great and he was pleased with the healing process he said there could be a hole but it must be very very tiny, but they would repair that when he has his Bone graft when hes 8-9 years old.

Mr Cadier also said that he would like to see Blake when he's about three years old regarding the bump under his lip, as one side was plumper when he had his Cleft the tissue was fatter. So when the repair was done one side under the lip is slightly fatter, and he wants to address this and possibly give Blake another surgery to correct this, by removing a small amount of tissue. We are also waiting to here when Blakes next hearing appointment will be to see whether his glue ear has gotten better or worse.

We have not settled into the new house very well although the children have, unfortunately we will be moving again next monday due to some unforeseen complications! but the next 'new house' is just down the road thank god children are so resilient! Tia has settled into her new Pre-School and Blake loves taking her, although I think he would like to stay with her!! lol So at least we won't have to change schools! We can't wait till the end of next month as Chris's sister Clare and my Friend Rachel are coming to visit!! ok maybe its me thats super excited.... might sneak out for a few drinks and let Chris have the munchkins!! why not ay?

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Hello everyone firstly I would like to thank all the viewers and followers to this blog, I have heard it is helping many people and families that are going through the same. Blake has changed so much over the past few months, He is nearly 15 months he has become a chunky monkey and loves his food!!! so I am sure you can all guess his hard palate is healing well, although  I noticed there was still food running from his nose but I soon realised that this has happened with others as I research into it and asked many of my cleft mummy friends! It actually happens more when he has a cold! which he has had on and off he can get very snotty! I seem to go through wipes like theres no tomorrow of late.

Blake's teeth seem to be coming through with no trouble! and they are reasonably in line to his gum, It is interesting to see, his back teeth came through without me noticing! My little star is doing so well I am a very proud mummy, he loves his sister so much and follows her everywhere! but he does have that brotherly boyish behaviour where he will literally tackle her to the ground! Very funny to watch by the way... I think Tia's favorite sentence at the moment is ''Mummy Blakey's getting me again!''

So Blake's into most things now, well when I say that I don't mean toy's I mean he's into everything like cupboards, sweeping brushes, house phones, wires, 'the fish tank draw' the list is endless and yes I do go on about my perfect little man but some days I can be pulling my hair out lol. Its a given boys will be boys as the saying goes. Saying this though I do enjoy watching him toddle around looking and learning its like you can actually see the cogs turning around in his head, he is very very clever, just like his sister.. hmm.. should I be worried?

Anyway last month we have been busy moving house! planning a wedding and moving house is uber stressful! so I have put wedding plans on hold till the move is sorted. In the same month we has Blake's Hard Palate repair check up at Salisbury Hospital, which I was a little nervous about as I was worried there maybe a hole because of the food running out from his nose, Mr Cadier however said it looked great and he was pleased with the healing process he said there could be a hole but it must be very very tiny, but they would repair that when he has his Bone graft when hes 8-9 years old.

Mr Cadier also said that he would like to see Blake when he's about three years old regarding the bump under his lip, as one side was plumper when he had his Cleft the tissue was fatter. So when the repair was done one side under the lip is slightly fatter, and he wants to address this and possibly give Blake another surgery to correct this, by removing a small amount of tissue. We are also waiting to here when Blakes next hearing appointment will be to see whether his glue ear has gotten better or worse.

We have not settled into the new house very well although the children have, unfortunately we will be moving again next monday due to some unforeseen complications! but the next 'new house' is just down the road thank god children are so resilient! Tia has settled into her new Pre-School and Blake loves taking her, although I think he would like to stay with her!! lol So at least we won't have to change schools! We can't wait till the end of next month as Chris's sister Clare and my Friend Rachel are coming to visit!! ok maybe its me thats super excited.... might sneak out for a few drinks and let Chris have the munchkins!! why not ay?

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Hello everyone! its been a very busy couple of months, we waited and waited for the dreaded letter to hit the door mat as we soon realized his surgery wasn't going to be the beginning of July! in the end we rang the hospital again and were told we would hear something soon and we did. The morning I got the letter I didn't want to open it straight away, I just new it wasn't going to be a date!! so I opened it later in the afternoon and sure enough it wasn't a date but a meet and great with the our surgeon Mr Cadier. for the following week. we went to the appointment, it was nice to see everyone and Blake showed off his 'standing skills'  they were impressed lol

 Mr Cadier checked Blakes hard palate and was happy he said it looked as though he would have a straight forward operation, and he explained to us what he was planning on doing. He asked if we were happy for the surgery to go a head and we signed the consent form. The ear specialist took the opportunity to check Blake's ears and asked us a few questions about his hearing, after his check he informed us that it looked like he may have Glue ear, which means it fluid has built up behind his ear drum, and this can affect hearing, sometimes it can clear up on its own but if not he may need to have a hearing aid or grommets fitted, we already new that this was a possibility as its common with cleft children. We were told Blake would need another hearing test to see how his hearing was.

Not long after seeing the Cleft team the 'real' dreaded letter hit the mat!! Blake's next surgery was scheduled for the 24th July 2012! couple of days later we got a call from our cleft nurse Nicola she told me that we were going to receive a letter saying the surgery had been cancelled! my heart sank, then she said to ignore the letter! then it bounced back up! she said we will also receive another letter saying it has been reinstated! my head was whirrling! then she aked whether Blake had had his hearing appointment yet? he hadn't so we were told to ring ENT clinic and ask our specialist whether he needed it before Blake had his surgery. we rang the hospital and arranged an appointment which we received in the post.

I arranged a lift to get to Salisbury hospital for Blakes hearing audio test, so that Chris wouldn't loose another day's wage. So Me Mel and Blake traveled the 40 mins to the hospital listening to Bon Jovi I wasn't worried too much about the test as I know Blake can hear me !! and he was enjoying the music he really likes music I love watching him dance! hes changed so much in the past few months turned into a chubby little boy ! and has hair just like his big sister Tia, he even has a curl at the back its so cute! He's very nearly on the verge of walking! hes done a few steps on his own unaided and hes tried to use his spoon while eating! clever little man :)

Anyway when we got to the hospital it looked like we were in for a long wait as it was very very busy... but soon as we sat down Blake was called and we were taken to a little sound proof audio room, the nurses explained what they were going to do, there was a little table in the middle with a few toys on one of the nurses would be playing with Blake while the other was playing sounds to see if Blake reacted to them if he did he was rewarded with some funny mechanical farm animals that were in glass boxes they would light up and move all very exciting!! He did quite well but the last sounds he didn't really react too, but we were not sure if it was because he was more interested in the toys or maybe he was bored lol The results would be sent to the specialist and he would decide if grommets would be needed. It was all very quick

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Hello everyone! It has been a very busy couple of months, we waited and waited for the dreaded letter for Blake's Hard Palate repair to hit the door mat, as we soon realized his surgery wasn't going to be the beginning of July! In the end we rang the hospital again, and were told we would hear something soon and we did. The morning I got the letter I didn't want to open it straight away, I just new it wasn't going to be a date!! So I opened it later in the afternoon and sure enough it wasn't a date but a meet and great with the our surgeon Mr Cadier for the following week. We went to the appointment, it was nice to see everyone and Blake showed off his 'standing skills'  they were impressed lol

 Mr Cadier checked Blakes hard palate and he was happy, he said it looked as though he would have a straight forward operation, and he explained to us what he was planning on doing. He asked if we were happy for the surgery to go a head and we signed the consent form. The ear specialist took the opportunity to check Blake's ears and asked us a few questions about his hearing, after his check he informed us that it looked like he may have Glue ear, which means  fluid has built up behind his ear drum, and this can affect hearing, sometimes it can clear up on its own but if not he may need to have a hearing aid or grommets fitted, we already new that this was a possibility as its common with cleft children. We were told Blake would need another hearing test to see how his hearing was.

Not long after seeing the Cleft team the 'real' dreaded letter hit the mat!! Blake's next surgery was scheduled for the 24th July 2012!  A couple of days later we got a call from our cleft nurse Nicola, she told me that we were going to receive a letter saying the surgery had been cancelled! my heart sank, then she said to ignore the letter! then it bounced back up! she said we will also receive another letter saying it has been reinstated! my head was whirrling! then she aked whether Blake had had his hearing appointment yet? he hadn't so we were told to ring ENT clinic and ask our specialist whether he needed it before Blake had his surgery. We rang the hospital and arranged an appointment which we received in the post.

I arranged a lift to get to Salisbury hospital for Blakes hearing audio test, so that Chris wouldn't loose another day's wage. So on the day Me and my good friend Mel put Blake in the car and traveled the 40 mins to the hospital listening to Jon Bon Jovi!  I wasn't worried too much about the test as I know Blake can hear me !! and he was enjoying the music bless him, he really likes music I love watching him dance! he has changed so much in the past few months, really has turned into a chubby little boy ! and has hair is just like his big sister Tia's, he even has a curl at the back its so cute! He's very nearly on the verge of walking! hes done a few steps on his own unaided and hes tried to use his spoon while eating! clever little man :)

Anyway when we got to the hospital it looked like we were in for a long wait as it was very very busy... but soon as we sat down Blake was called and we were taken to a little sound proof audio room, the nurses explained what they were going to do, there was a little table in the middle with a few toys on one of the nurses would be playing with Blake while the other was playing sounds to see if Blake reacted to them if he did he was rewarded with some funny mechanical farm animals that were in glass boxes they would light up and move all very exciting!! He did quite well but the last sounds he didn't really react too, but we were not sure if it was because he was more interested in the toys or maybe he was bored lol The results would be sent to the specialist and he would decide if grommets would be needed. It was all very quick and we all headed back home I was a little concerned, but I didn't let it play too much on my mind as the surgery date was looming.

Chris's Sister Beka has come to visit! what a lovely surprise and brilliant timing! as Blake was having his surgery the following Tuesday... support is a necessity at these times, as I generally falls apart with anxiety! I know that he will be OK and that he is in fabulous hands but you just cant help it can you. On the Sunday before blakes surgery it happened to be Wessex CLAPA Fun-day!! at Salisbury Hospital I booked it off work specially as it was wonderful the year before and Tia really enjoyed it! there was a BBQ, Charlie the clown (whom I thought was excellent) and he even made Chris and Beka laugh! bouncy castles (which Blake really loved!!) and other fun things going on Tia had a pink tiger painted on her face she looked amazing! saw a few other cleft mum's saw my friend Gemma and her gorgeous little man Leon she chatted with me about Blakes surgery and made me feel so much better! less anxious it was worth going just for that wonderful support. It turned out to be an excellent day! we even dropped in on Mel and my uncle Arron on the way home.

Monday night I had to get Blake's bag together I got a few of his favorite toys as I wanted him to feel at home, he's really into cars at the moment! so I put few of them in along with his special monkey and mousy got my things ready as well as I would be staying with him we were told he would be in for one night but two days. So I packed myself a book to read. Me and Chris went to give blood that evening and while I was there the hospital phoned and told us to be at the ward for 7am and that Blake was aloud some weatabix and milk in the morning and water up until 11am. After that call it hit me, I guess I had been trying not to think bout it, I must have welled up a little as one of the nurses asked if I was OK, I just explained, my son was going for surgery in the morning, that I was OK to give blood. While waiting thoughts of Blakes first surgery came flooding back and so did all the emotions. I told Chris the hospital had rang and told him we had to be there for 7am. That was a hard night and I didn't sleep very well.

Beka would be watching Tia while me and Chris went to hospital, that morning we got ready made sure we had everything while Blake had his breakfast the night before I explained to Tia what was going to be happening, but that morning she wasn't happy! she wanted to come with us, I said she had to stay with beka and explained again what was happening I asked her if she was worried about Blake and she said 'yes' bless her, we told her she would see him on Wednesday when she came to collect him from hospital! and gave her a hug, she gave Blake a kiss! and we set off for hospital. Although we new the date we didn't know the time of the surgery, but figured it was around afternoon time.

when we arrived we were shown to our room after being booked in this time we had room one on Sarum ward, I didn't need showing around as I new it well, the nurse looking after Blake came in and did a few checks  and explained a few things to us and said the Registrar would come soon to chat with us, so we got blakes things settled in then went to the play room, which Blake loved!! not so long after the Registrar came and chatted for a bit and told us blakes surgery was third on the list and would be taking place after lunch. I asked if Blake would be getting grommets fitted as we hadn't heard anything and he said he would find out. There was a lot of waiting and we were both tired, then the nurse came with a little gown for Blake to wear it had boats on it and light houses! it was very cute. So we changed blakes nappy and put the gown on him he had been very good all day and didn't cry or grumble considering he had only had his breakfast he was in high spirits! and unaware of what was a head.

A different Registrar came in to see us this time we new her she assisted with blakes first surgery! she remembered Blake and said how lovely he was it was time to go to theater.. my stomach churned, while we were waiting the other Registrar came and told us at this time Blake wouldn't be needing grommets so that was great news.  I asked Chris do you want to put him under this time? he declined my offer... im not surprised he didn't want to do it.... its the hardest thing to do in the world, and this time Blake wasn't a baby he was very aware and I dreaded it. We walked to theater and I sat on a stool and held Blake in my arms he was looking around and wondering what was going on,  the mask was placed over his face and all I could say was 'its OK baby' mummy's here' I love you baby' he focused on me then went limp after a minute. I lifted him onto the table then kissed him goodbye. I came out and I felt like my heart had just been ripped up through my throat. I welled up couldn't hold back my tears.Chris comforted me the registrar said don't worry he is in good hands! as we walked out of the waiting area, but in the stairwell I sobbed in Chris's arms.

Waiting is the worst thing ever I hate waiting. We went for a coffee in the Restaurant then e rang and checked on Tia I rang and gave my mum an update it was a very hot day so we took a stroll around the hospital before getting another coffee and going back to wait in the ward it must have been about 3 hours when the call came that he was awake! we practically ran to the recovery to see him... We heard him before we saw him he wasn't very happy at all... bless him he was very hot and angry and had blood oozing from his nose! I gave him water and couldn't believe it when he guzzled it down then he through it back at me! We could not calm him down it was a good 20 mins before he finally gave in, and settled into Chris arms. I though its the heat and I bet he's starving ! we blamed the 'greens' too lol (nurses in green) we were ready to go back to the ward, Chris and Blake were wheeled back on a bed and I walked behind full of thoughts and emotions.

We cleaned Blake up but the Blood still trickled out every now and again I had brought some puree food with us as Blake would only be aloud soft food I got a jar out and his face lit up! I took him and Chris fed him he ate the lot I was surprised it didn't hurt but then the nurses said he wouldn't feel pain again he wasn't able to feel anything from the anesthetic he had been given. Blake was happy to be back with the blues! (nurses in blue) he settled down after that and fell asleep. I told Chris he should go home! and gets some rest, It was getting late and I was shattered physically and mentally. the nurses were brilliant through the night keeping up with his medication,

Blake slept through I didn't sleep well though. The next morning Blake was peeping at me through the cot and he started laughing !!! bless him hes amazing he's such a bloody trouper!!! the medication kept him happy, as long as he wasn't in pain that's all that mattered,Chris arrived with Tia in tow eager to see her baby brother!! later that morning our Cleft nurse Nicola came to see us! and told us Blake could go home later that day as all was well. The nurses did there final checks and came and took out his meds tube and put a cute plaster on his foot! which Tia was quite impressed by! Nicola brought Mr Cadier to see us and said it all went well and he was pleased with the surgery.. I thanked him, he is amazing.

Nicola said she would be coming to visit us at home soon and that we would be back in clinic for Blake's check up in three months time. Finally we were discharged and we thanked everyone and headed to the car ready for home. Relief that another chapter has ended we just hope that he heals well and the hole doesn't reopen. We are not sure whether there will be anymore surgeries but we know that its a possibility his next major one with be his bone graft from thigh to gum. Dreading that the most Blessed be everyone! and thank you for following Blakes journey..... its not over yet

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It has been a while since our last post, but I am pleased to say Blake has come along wonderfully, he will be one in two weeks! time has certainly flown by thinking about it this time last year I was packing my maternity bag! and thinking about all the things that we would be about to face as a family. I am so proud of my son I have come to the conclusion that there is actually no point worrying and the best thing to do is go with the flow.

Blake is cursing along the furniture now and walks along with his walker and he loves it he beams with delight at what he has achieved for himself, it wont be long now and its so exciting....
We are waiting to here from the Hospital so every time the post comes I hope there's a letter with a date! cant help the frustration when there no letter. I must say I was hoping that it would have been done before his birthday but that's just the way it goes it's a waiting game! We rang the hospital for advice and they think they will be doing his hard palate either the beginning or end of July so we shall see.

We are going to have a small Tea Party for Blakes birthday something to look forward too! you never know he might take his first steps on this day! another waiting game! :) Blake has been pretty happy over the past few months apart from teething and a few ear infections, which is to be expected, he is eating really well actually he pretty much eats anything ! Blake will scream the house down if you have something you have to share everything with him the little monkey is rather partial to custard creams!

Well it has been a very busy few months, its been all go and lets not forget Cleft Lip and Palate Awareness Week!! We did really well at work big Thank You to The Co-operative, Gillingham, Dorset for helping support this wonderful charity and my son. I had a special poster Made of Blake and it showed the different stages that he went through, I thought it would be a good way to help people see what our beautiful children have to go through even though it was only a snippet.

Some people reacted to it, and didn't know what it was, and I just explained what was in the picture and then they saw his latest picture and were amazed by how happy and smiley he was some people didn't even realize it was the same child. There were a few negative reactions but that's to be expected. We went shopping last week and a group of school girls got excited as the recognized Blake from the poster  and one girl asked if he was OK! and that he was so cute, at that point Blake held out his special blanket to her it made everyone laugh! its like he was famous lol they were very sweet!

the CLAPA tubs were full to the brim and I counted the money and found that in that one week we had raised £127.02 and I am happy to say that my store is having CLAPA as there charity of the year so we will raise plenty more!

My two monkey's are demanding my attention so I shall better go play then it will hopefully be nap time!

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It has been a while since our last post, but I am pleased to say Blake has come along wonderfully, he will be one in two weeks! time has certainly flown by thinking about it this time last year I was packing my maternity bag! and thinking about all the things that we would be about to face as a family. I am so proud of my son I have come to the conclusion that there is actually no point worrying and the best thing to do is go with the flow.

Blake is cursing along the furniture now and walks along with his walker and he loves it he beams with delight at what he has achieved for himself, it wont be long now and its so exciting....
We are waiting to here from the Hospital so every time the post comes I hope there's a letter with a date! cant help the frustration when there no letter. I must say I was hoping that it would have been done before his birthday but that's just the way it goes it's a waiting game! We rang the hospital for advice and they think they will be doing his hard palate either the beginning or end of July so we shall see.

We are going to have a small Tea Party for Blakes birthday something to look forward too! you never know he might take his first steps on this day! another waiting game! :) Blake has been pretty happy over the past few months apart from teething and a few ear infections, which is to be expected, he is eating really well actually he pretty much eats anything ! Blake will scream the house down if you have something you have to share everything with him the little monkey is rather partial to custard creams!

Well it has been a very busy few months, its been all go and lets not forget Cleft Lip and Palate Awareness Week!! We did really well at work big Thank You to The Co-operative, Gillingham, Dorset for helping support this wonderful charity and my son. I had a special poster Made of Blake and it showed the different stages that he went through, I thought it would be a good way to help people see what our beautiful children have to go through even though it was only a snippet.

Some people reacted to it, and didn't know what it was, and I just explained what was in the picture and then they saw his latest picture and were amazed by how happy and smiley he was some people didn't even realize it was the same child. There were a few negative reactions but that's to be expected. We went shopping last week and a group of school girls got excited as the recognized Blake from the poster  and one girl asked if he was OK! and that he was so cute, at that point Blake held out his special blanket to her it made everyone laugh! its like he was famous lol they were very sweet!

the CLAPA tubs were full to the brim and I counted the money and found that in that one week we had raised £127.02 and I am happy to say that my store is having CLAPA as there charity of the year so we will raise plenty more!

My two monkey's are demanding my attention so I shall better go play then it will hopefully be nap time!

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Its been a pretty full on month the whole family have been full of cold, then struck down by the sickness bug but thankfully everyone is on the mend! Well I have gone back to work it has been a big step but my choice as we need the money and now we know that Blake maybe having his second surgery sometime in April ill be aloud the time off, its hard leaving the kids but its only one day and two evenings a week and I know that there safe with Chris. We also had a wonderful Valentines day this year as Chris asked me to marry him!!! and of course I said YES! Tia is so excited as she knows she will get to wear a pretty dress for the wedding next year! we have booked it for the 18th May 2013 and I have already started planning!! :)

Then to make my mood even better Blakes story was out in That's Life Magazine on the 16th Feb and it was lovely to finally see in print. I bought a few copies for myself and sent one off to CLAPA and took some photocopies and sent them off to a few people that could not get hold of the magazine. I think im going to frame it! I hope it has helped other families that have read it, I was a little disappointed that the link to my blog wasn't printed but never mind!

We as a family have made some wonderful friends in our neighbors there called Toby & Nykki and they have two children called Gracie & Freddie they have been a great help with Blake and Tia,  as our lovely cat Theo became very ill and we nearly had to have him put down, but luckily he has pulled through! so thank you guys! and thank you to Sandra who gave some fantastic advice. Its so good to know that there are good friends and support all around you I know Blakes going to be OK as he grows up. He really is crawling now in fact he's already pulling himself up on things! I cant believe it hes very dinky so its funny seeing him doing these things! he has two bottom teeth through, his lip is looking great and the redness is pretty much gone now but I still have to massage his lip. Blake is really babbling now and his favorite word is 'awaah'  its so cute he comes out with lots of different sounds he really makes me laugh.

Blake had his first Speech therapy session this week to be honest we wasn't to sure what to expect or why it was so early but it was really good and I really enjoyed it, We got to Salisbury hospital at 3pm we were called into the room and were told that the sessions usually have a few families but that the other two had cancelled which was a shame as it would have been nice to meet them and share the experience! but never mind, the first thing we saw was the mountains of exciting toys on the floor!!! Blake was quite happy too sit down and play the therapist told us all about Glue ear and why and how it happens a we were given some information as she said its likely Blake could get it at some point, then she mainly concentrated on Blake and asked about his progress, she made lots of funny noises which was pretty funny did my best not to laugh, but she told us we would need to do this to aid Blakes development and it was best to be at least two feet in front of him and get him to watch our lips moving, the main thing she was watching for was that he was closing his lips together and making noises which she said he was and that he had made several different sound which was great! she said if he makes gurgling rough sounds then we had to ignore them and repeat other sounds he makes to encourage him! I thought the session went really well... and his next one wont be till he's 18 month old. hopefully there will be some other families there :)

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Its been a pretty full on month the whole family have been full of cold, then struck down by the sickness bug but thankfully everyone is on the mend! Well I have gone back to work it has been a big step but my choice as we need the money and now we know that Blake maybe having his second surgery sometime in April ill be aloud the time off, its hard leaving the kids but its only one day and two evenings a week and I know that there safe with Chris. We also had a wonderful Valentines day this year as Chris asked me to marry him!!! and of course I said YES! Tia is so excited as she knows she will get to wear a pretty dress for the wedding next year! we have booked it for the 18th May 2013 and I have already started planning!! :)

Then to make my mood even better Blakes story was out in That's Life Magazine on the 16th Feb and it was lovely to finally see in print. I bought a few copies for myself and sent one off to CLAPA and took some photocopies and sent them off to a few people that could not get hold of the magazine. I think im going to frame it! I hope it has helped other families that have read it, I was a little disappointed that the link to my blog wasn't printed but never mind!

We as a family have made some wonderful friends in our neighbors there called Toby & Nykki and they have two children called Gracie & Freddie they have been a great help with Blake and Tia,  as our lovely cat Theo became very ill and we nearly had to have him put down, but luckily he has pulled through! so thank you guys! and thank you to Sandra who gave some fantastic advice. Its so good to know that there are good friends and support all around you I know Blakes going to be OK as he grows up. He really is crawling now in fact he's already pulling himself up on things! I cant believe it hes very dinky so its funny seeing him doing these things! he has two bottom teeth through, his lip is looking great and the redness is pretty much gone now but I still have to massage his lip. Blake is really babbling now and his favorite word is 'awaah'  its so cute he comes out with lots of different sounds he really makes me laugh.

Blake had his first Speech therapy session this week to be honest we wasn't to sure what to expect or why it was so early but it was really good and I really enjoyed it, We got to Salisbury hospital at 3pm we were called into the room and were told that the sessions usually have a few families but that the other two had cancelled which was a shame as it would have been nice to meet them and share the experience! but never mind, the first thing we saw was the mountains of exciting toys on the floor!!! Blake was quite happy too sit down and play the therapist told us all about Glue ear and why and how it happens a we were given some information as she said its likely Blake could get it at some point, then she mainly concentrated on Blake and asked about his progress, she made lots of funny noises which was pretty funny did my best not to laugh, but she told us we would need to do this to aid Blakes development and it was best to be at least two feet in front of him and get him to watch our lips moving, the main thing she was watching for was that he was closing his lips together and making noises which she said he was and that he had made several different sound which was great! she said if he makes gurgling rough sounds then we had to ignore them and repeat other sounds he makes to encourage him! I thought the session went really well... and his next one wont be till he's 18 month old. hopefully there will be some other families there :)

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Things have been very exciting in the Fenton household, Blake has come leaps and bounds in the last few weeks! he has mastered the art of crawling down to a T! and well he isn't like what Tia was if he see's something he wants he goes and gets it lol and when you tell him 'NO' you get the cheekiest grin in the world never mind the biggest! he is so adorable but I would say this im his mummy.

Our Cleft nurse Nicola came to see me recently and was pleased with how Blake was getting on and she showed me how to massage his scar as she said it was a little raised he let her do it but then again he was more interested in squeezing her boobs typical male! It was rather amusing though! so best thing to use would be bio oil, so we have to massage twice a day for a couple of minutes ... but it seems he would rather Nicola do it as he wont let me :( but I keep trying

I cant believe how much Blake has changed since he was born when I look back at the pictures its like looking at a different baby,  the next stage will be his hard palate repair, and although im anxious I have every confidence putting the care of my boy in Mr Cadier's arms he is amazing. you all may have noticed I have put some links onto my blog, for charities that help raise awareness for Cleft lip and Palate! these two other charities help children in countries that don't get the wonderful care that we get, so if you find it in your hearts to donate im sure there will be a small child will gain so much from your genourosity !

I got a phone call from That's Life magazine they read out the article again for me to check everything was OK,  I am so pleased they are printing Blakes story, raising awareness in any way makes me happy. they told me the article will be out on the 16th Feb I feel a little nervous about it! I have also recently set up a group on Facebook, to help children make friends whom are in similar situations it is called cleft lip and palate community be my cleft buddy! it is basically a pen pal system were mums and children can write letters for there babies or children so they will grow up and hopefully end up with a long term buddy.. as we all know its unlikely for there to be another child in there school that has a cleft lip or palate, its gone down well and we have over 50 members!

Yesterday we had our post op review at Salisbury Hospital, It was lovely to see the team again Mr Cadier was very happy with Blake and we signed the consent form for the next op which could be in April  this month has been very busy, I start back at work on the 15th Feb so im hoping to get the letter soon so I can book time off at work if need be, this is one on the worst bits the waiting. I have three Cleft buddy letters to write.... so I will  update you all soon Thank You for all your support :) God Bless

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Things have been very exciting in the Fenton household, Blake has come leaps and bounds in the last few weeks! he has mastered the art of crawling down to a T! and well he isn't like what Tia was if he see's something he wants he goes and gets it lol and when you tell him 'NO' you get the cheekiest grin in the world never mind the biggest! today he has also finally cut his first tooth after months of teething!!! Tia was very excited but Blake wasn't very happy bless him, he is so adorable but I would say this im his mummy.

Our Cleft nurse Nicola came to see me recently and was pleased with how Blake was getting on and she showed me how to massage his scar as she said it was a little raised he let her do it but then again he was more interested in squeezing her boobs typical male! It was rather amusing though! Nicola suggested Bio oil but as its expensive she did recommend other products but I am a big fan so decided to use bio oil. We have to massage his lip twice a day for a couple of minutes ... but it seems he would rather Nicola do it as he wont let me :( but I keep trying

I cant believe how much Blake has changed since he was born when I look back at the pictures its like looking at a different baby,  the next stage will be his hard palate repair, and although im anxious I have every confidence putting the care of my boy in Mr Cadier's arms he is amazing. you all may have noticed I have put some links onto my blog, for charities that help raise awareness for Cleft lip and Palate! these two other charities help children in countries that don't get the wonderful care that we get, so if you find it in your hearts to donate im sure there will be a small child will gain so much from your genourosity !

I got a phone call from That's Life magazine they read out the article again for me to check everything was OK,  I am so pleased they are printing Blakes story, raising awareness in any way makes me happy. they told me the article will be out on the 16th Feb I feel a little nervous about it! I have also recently set up a group on Facebook, to help children make friends whom are in similar situations it is called cleft lip and palate community be my cleft buddy! it is basically a pen pal system were mums and children can write letters for there babies or children so they will grow up and hopefully end up with a long term buddy.. as we all know its unlikely for there to be another child in there school that has a cleft lip or palate, its gone down well and we have over 50 members!

Yesterday we had our post op review at Salisbury Hospital, It was lovely to see the team again Mr Cadier was very happy with Blake and we signed the consent form for the next op which could be in April  this month has been very busy, I start back at work on the 15th Feb so im hoping to get the letter soon so I can book time off at work if need be, this is one on the worst bits the waiting. I have three Cleft buddy letters to write.... so I will  update you all soon Thank You for all your support :) God Bless

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So it's been a couple of months since Blake had his first surgery and I am very pleased to say he is doing brilliantly! he is feeding and eating really well, we are still using the special mam bottles for Blakes milk feeds. My little man has found his thumb! which is really sweet, Tia had a dummy when she was a baby so she calls it Blake's dummy thumb bless her, he even puts his thumb in his mouth while im feeding him his solids which at first was quite frustrating and very messy! especially when there's food coming out of his nose but its even messier when he sneezes, it makes me laugh, he hates having his nose wiped though I guess it will be uncomfortable, but I am sure it will get better with time. Once his hard palate is repaired that wont happen anymore.  I was a little concerned at first that he was using his thumb to push the food in the hole in his hard palate, but I guess its a comfort thing he has taken too.

Blake had lots of visitors after his surgery and he received lots of get well soon cards from family and friends, The support we have received was amazing and everybody was amazed by the wonderful job the cleft team had done. It took about a two weeks for the purple glue strip to drop off and the more that fell off the more exciting it became to see how he looked, it was amazing the difference was shocking but he was so happy and he was still Blake always smiling, even though it was sore. He is going to have a cute scare I call it his Harry Potter scare as it has a slight zig zag just like the one on Harry's forehead!

We went on a trip to visit family in Yorkshire as we knew everyone wanted to see how Blake was doing My mum was so excited and chuffed to bits with the repair! we had a lovely time and Blake and Tia were spoilt rotten as usual. We as a family were looking forward to Christmas this year its like a lot of stress and worry had been lifted after the surgery... and we knew we would be spending it in Yorkshire with both our families. Even though we know there will be more repairs to come we were just glad we got through the first stage.

We have been watching Blake grow and change,  his personality is really shining through he has such an infectious laugh and I think he will start crawling soon hes not quite figured out how to move but he goes on all fours and starts rocking away!and the way he interacts with Tia is amazing he loves her so so much I love watching them play together. He's a mummy's boy and a daddy's boy..... so so loving I swear my boy never stops smiling and now his lip is really healing he's more able to smile... I was worried his smiles wouldn't be as big as before but I tell you they are just as beautiful he really does have the biggest smile in the world..... to me. I am so blessed to have two beautiful children.

My blogs seems to have become very popular and it has been read by people all over the world, I am so pleased as I decided to write this as I wanted to help other families, mothers that are going through the motions as we have, if it helps just one person its been worthwhile. A popular magazine in the British market called That's Life has read my blog via Facebook and contacted me as they wanted to publish Blakes story in there health page I was delighted it would mean raising more awareness for cleft lip and palate, I said yes straight away to me it was a wonderful opportunity! I was interviewed over the phone, which I found very emotional recalling everything that had happened during and after my pregnancy and realized I had pushed a lot of feelings and emotions aside, like I had left them in a shoe box. that same evening the article was read back to me over the phone.......... it left a lump in my throat, and it touched my heart. I was told I would be receiving £250 for my story I will be donating some to CLAPA and buying something for my special boy and Tia my children

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So it's been a couple of months since Blake had his first surgery and I am very pleased to say he is doing brilliantly! he is feeding and eating really well, we are still using the special mam bottles for Blakes milk feeds. My little man has found his thumb! which is really sweet, Tia had a dummy when she was a baby so she calls it Blake's dummy thumb bless her, he even puts his thumb in his mouth while im feeding him his solids which at first was quite frustrating and very messy! especially when there's food coming out of his nose but its even messier when he sneezes, it makes me laugh, he hates having his nose wiped though I guess it will be uncomfortable, but I am sure it will get better with time. Once his hard palate is repaired that wont happen anymore.  I was a little concerned at first that he was using his thumb to push the food in the hole in his hard palate, but I guess its a comfort thing he has taken too.

Blake had lots of visitors after his surgery and he received lots of get well soon cards from family and friends, The support we have received was amazing and everybody was amazed by the wonderful job the cleft team had done. It took about a two weeks for the purple glue strip to drop off and the more that fell off the more exciting it became to see how he looked, it was amazing the difference was shocking but he was so happy and he was still Blake always smiling, even though it was sore. He is going to have a cute scare I call it his Harry Potter scare as it has a slight zig zag just like the one on Harry's forehead!

We went on a trip to visit family in Yorkshire as we knew everyone wanted to see how Blake was doing My mum was so excited and chuffed to bits with the repair! we had a lovely time and Blake and Tia were spoilt rotten as usual. We as a family were looking forward to Christmas this year its like a lot of stress and worry had been lifted after the surgery... and we knew we would be spending it in Yorkshire with both our families. Even though we know there will be more repairs to come we were just glad we got through the first stage.

We have been watching Blake grow and change,  his personality is really shining through he has such an infectious laugh and I think he will start crawling soon hes not quite figured out how to move but he goes on all fours and starts rocking away!and the way he interacts with Tia is amazing he loves her so so much I love watching them play together. He's a mummy's boy and a daddy's boy..... so so loving I swear my boy never stops smiling and now his lip is really healing he's more able to smile... I was worried his smiles wouldn't be as big as before but I tell you they are just as beautiful he really does have the biggest smile in the world..... to me. I am so blessed to have two beautiful children.

My blogs seems to have become very popular and it has been read by people all over the world, I am so pleased as I decided to write this as I wanted to help other families, mothers that are going through the motions as we have, if it helps just one person its been worthwhile. A popular magazine in the British market called That's Life has read my blog via Facebook and contacted me as they wanted to publish Blakes story in there health page I was delighted it would mean raising more awareness for cleft lip and palate, I said yes straight away to me it was a wonderful opportunity! I was interviewed over the phone, which I found very emotional recalling everything that had happened during and after my pregnancy and realized I had pushed a lot of feelings and emotions aside, like I had left them in a shoe box. that same evening the article was read back to me over the phone.......... it left a lump in my throat, and it touched my heart. I was told I would be receiving £250 for my story I will be donating some to CLAPA and buying something for my special boy and Tia my children are so inspiring, they deserve a massive treat. If your in England 'That's Life Magazine' issue 8 out end of February 2012 So exciting! hope you all can read it.

We had a great Christmas and we are hoping fore a wonderful new year but in the back of my mind I have already been thinking about the next surgery, but in a more positive light, stronger, happier and incredibly proud.

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The day finally arrived to take Blake to hospital, nerve's were kicking in even though it was just Admission day, just the thought of driving there was making me feel sick. I spent Sunday packing Blake's Bag, then repacking it, hoping not to forgot anything then when we got to hospital I remembered we had forgotten Blakes mouse, I could have kicked myself!!! the one thing I wanted to remember 'Blake's comforter.' We got a lovely gift for Blake from my cousin Leeann  it brought a tear my eye, so sweet, it was a cute monkey with a t-shirt that had his full name on with the slogan '1 special brave boy' I decided to hang it from his cot!

We were shown to our own room on the Sarum ward at Salisbury Hospital, it was a beautiful ward, room number 7 there were a few other families on the ward and it really pulls on your heart strings to see poorly children! I just kept thinking to myself  'he's in good hands he's in good hands'  We were given a tour of the ward  to refresh our memories of where things were again, we then settled into our room, over the next few hours we had many people pop in and introduce themselves, from nurses to the doctors that would be working on Blake in theatre, we also found out that is surgery was going to be at 10.30am Tuesday morning and not 3pm Tuesday afternoon! so that was a snippet of good news in away.

Chris stayed with us as long as he could, and we both had lots of cuddles with Blake and we took some lovely pictures throughout the day and of course all the nurses fell in love with our little chap! but it soon turned to the evening and he had to get home get some sleep and be back for the morning, well that was the plan, I got a text message from him telling me he couldn't get any cash as the cash machine as it was broken the poor love had to walk to the petrol station to get some money so he could get out of the car park! he had to walk a fair way he was shattered when he got home. I didn't sleep much at all I could hear a child screaming and crying next door... poor little love, too many things whizzing around in my thoughts didn't help either!

It was now the Surgery day! I woke up to Blake happily playing in his cot he seemed really happy, unaware of what the day was bringing, I was so worried and very emotional but holding it together as well as I could. All I wanted was to give Blake as many cuddles as I could. Blake wasn't aloud any milk after 4am so I gave him his last feed at 3.30am his last feed with his cleft. I was also able to give him water up until 8am but he was not impressed with that!  It was hard not being aloud to give him anything but he seemed to settle when Chris arrived! and maybe that had something to do with daddy bringing Mr Mousy with him lol as 10am approached we both became little nervous and I kept saying to Chris hes going to be OK isn't he? 10.30am arrived and we were still waiting... we received lots of messages on Facebook and texts from family and friends it was wonderful to have such brilliant support!

Every knock at the door made use look up wide eyed! till finally we got the knock we were waiting for...
'Mr Cadier and his team are ready for you now!' it was his registrar, she asked us a few questions then took us to theatre, She asked who would be going with Blake we looked at each other and I said that I wanted to go, I wished it could have been us both but my motherly instinct just took over.... I held my beautiful boy in my arms safe and close as the mask was placed over his mouth, he looked at me.. then drifted out of consciousnesses, i'm not going to lie or play this down as I placed him on the table myself  I felt like my heart was being squeezed from inside out! I felt guilt, not being able to stay and hold his tiny hand it was horrendous... Read the rest of this post

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The day finally arrived to take Blake to hospital, nerve's were kicking in even though it was just Admission day, just the thought of driving there was making me feel sick. I spent Sunday packing Blake's Bag, then repacking it, hoping not to forgot anything then when we got to hospital I remembered we had forgotten Blakes mouse, I could have kicked myself!!! the one thing I wanted to remember 'Blake's comforter.' We got a lovely gift for Blake from my cousin Leeann  it brought a tear my eye, so sweet, it was a cute monkey with a t-shirt that had his full name on with the slogan '1 special brave boy' I decided to hang it from his cot!

We were shown to our own room on the Sarum ward at Salisbury Hospital, it was a beautiful ward, room number 7 there were a few other families on the ward and it really pulls on your heart strings to see poorly children! I just kept thinking to myself  'he's in good hands he's in good hands'  We were given a tour of the ward  to refresh our memories of where things were again, we then settled into our room, over the next few hours we had many people pop in and introduce themselves, from nurses to the doctors that would be working on Blake in theatre, we also found out that is surgery was going to be at 10.30am Tuesday morning and not 3pm Tuesday afternoon! so that was a snippet of good news in away.

Chris stayed with us as long as he could, and we both had lots of cuddles with Blake and we took some lovely pictures throughout the day and of course all the nurses fell in love with our little chap! but it soon turned to the evening and he had to get home get some sleep and be back for the morning, well that was the plan, I got a text message from him telling me he couldn't get any cash as the cash machine as it was broken the poor love had to walk to the petrol station to get some money so he could get out of the car park! he had to walk a fair way he was shattered when he got home. I didn't sleep much at all I could hear a child screaming and crying next door... poor little love, too many things whizzing around in my thoughts didn't help either!

It was now the Surgery day! I woke up to Blake happily playing in his cot he seemed really happy, unaware of what the day was bringing, I was so worried and very emotional but holding it together as well as I could. All I wanted was to give Blake as many cuddles as I could. Blake wasn't aloud any milk after 4am so I gave him his last feed at 3.30am his last feed with his cleft. I was also able to give him water up until 8am but he was not impressed with that!  It was hard not being aloud to give him anything but he seemed to settle when Chris arrived! and maybe that had something to do with daddy bringing Mr Mousy with him lol as 10am approached we both became little nervous and I kept saying to Chris hes going to be OK isn't he? 10.30am arrived and we were still waiting... we received lots of messages on Facebook and texts from family and friends it was wonderful to have such brilliant support!

Every knock at the door made use look up wide eyed! till finally we got the knock we were waiting for...
'Mr Cadier and his team are ready for you now!' it was his registrar, she asked us a few questions then took us to theatre, She asked who would be going with Blake we looked at each other and I said that I wanted to go, I wished it could have been us both but my motherly instinct just took over.... I held my beautiful boy in my arms safe and close as the mask was placed over his mouth, he looked at me.. then drifted out of consciousnesses, i'm not going to lie or play this down as I placed him on the table myself  I felt like my heart was being squeezed from inside out! I felt guilt, not being able to stay and hold his tiny hand it was horrendous... he was in good hands was all I could think to stop my knees from buckling like Bambi. I suppressed all my emotions and held it together till we got back to the ward room, I felt physically sick. We hugged for a while and I let a few tears go. We were in for a long wait the registrar said it would be around 4 hours, as they were repairing the soft palate as well as his lip. They said that they would call the ward when he was awake.

We decided to have a wonder down to the hospital restaurant, we didn't know what to do with our time, we had food and a coffee, we played a game to take our minds off things I saw Vinnie Jones enter the cafe! and that became our game, of course it wasn't the real Vinnie! we then kept our eyes open for famous looky likey's it made us both laugh... nobody topped Vinnie Jones though! We went back to the ward to wait... it felt like days. Finally just after 4pm there was a knock at the door, we were told we could go collect our little boy.....oh my gosh I was so nervous... Me and Chris held hands tightly as we walked to recovery.

It was  SHOCK to see him I was lost for word he looked very swollen and bloody, They said I could hold him and  that the op went well but it went in one ear and out of the other I just wanted him in my arms, he was very drugged up. I studied his face his eye lashes were all wet so I knew he had been crying! my poor little man. He was covered in blood and bruises which was quite scary. There were whimpers every now and again, he was well that's all that mattered, I was so proud of my boy. We had to wait for about 20 minutes before we could take him back on the ward. It was overwhelming and I welled up and had some tears , I looked over at Chris and he had welled up as well.... Our little man looked absouloutly gorgeous they had done a fantastic job you could see that even under the blood. I don't know how to express my gratitude! Thank you Mr Cadier and his wonderful team.

So many emotions were in the air it had been a long day, the registrar explained that the glue holding the stitches was not the normal type the use it was usually a light blue but Blakes was bright purple! everybody thought it was a bruise, his face was very swollen and sore but he looked amazing and he was tired so he went to sleep for a while we had loads of support from friend and family it did become a bit much though and I had to switch my phone off. Blake was on a fluid drip, and the nurses g,ave him drugs every two hours as well as morphine in the night.... Blake was doing so well he's my brave little solider. It was a very long night and I didnt sleep much for worry. I just waited for the morning to come.

I woke around 7.30am got dressed and went to the kitchen when I got back to the room Blake was awake !! and guess what I got  little smile!!! bless him it was amazing I felt truly blessed to have such a wonderful son.
Later in the day Chris's sister came to visit with Tia! it was lovely to see her i'd missed her so much and she clearly missed me I got a great big huggle! Tia wanted to see Blake, Clare gave him a cuddle first then she knelt down and the look on Blakes face when he saw Tia made my heart burst he beamed at her  'well as much as he could'  he was so pleased to see her it brought tears to my eyes again, Tia stroked and patted his head gently then said   'awwww..... Blakey got his lip now mummypig!'

It had been a very long day but Blake was doing very well Mr Cadier came and was pleased with him I told him he had done a wonderful job, that man deserves a throne in heaven. Thank you so much.
A friend came to visit and brought some flowers she thought Blake looked amazing!  It had been three days but it felt like three weeks! I was ready to go home with my son, We were hoping we would be aloud to take him home the next day, but it all depended on Blake taking his milk which he was finding difficult. He was eating solids though as I had started to ween him a couple of weeks before surgery, so I just kept trying with the bottle, but give up when he got upset I didn't want to force it and cause him stress he been through enough in my book I just prayed he would pick up in the morning. which thankfully he did! he had ready break first then he managed to take 40 ml of milk from his bottle, I was so pleased. the cleft nurse came (Nicola Hudson whom is also wonderful) came to see us again she said we were aloud to go home!!! I rang Chris with the good news!

we are at home now. I would like to say a MASSIVE ' Thank You to the nurses from the Sarum Ward at Salisbury Hospital they were absouloutly fantastic with Blake.'

To Mr Cadier 'Thank you for making my boy Even more Gorgeous its a fabulous repair.'

To Friends and Family ' you all kept me strong thank you for the over whelming love and support you all gave xxx'


This journey is not over yet..........

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