It is a known fact that times change, nothing stays the same. Pointing out the obvious is not my intent here; my intent is to share how quickly things can creep up on you.

I have been purposefully ignoring writing. It has taken a lot to not just sit down and start writing about one thing or another. I guess I am trying to think before I actually hit submit. Many times I have wanted to just “go off” and say what I think but then I am reminded of oh, so many people who have done that and regret it in the end.

Here’s the Thing…things can change and it is okay that they do.

I do not know but after being married for 25 years I guess I never thought that I would be getting….gasp… divorced.

Yep, I am and I am okay with it; so is my significant other.

Here is where I have to tell my Mom who reads every blog, that it is okay…Yes, mom, I am okay.

Why write about it, why not? It is okay to go separate ways. Do I blame anyone? No, I really don’t except for, maybe a little… 

Is Maddie okay? She is a typical teenager who seems to worry more about the halo over her teenage head than what has happened, thank goodness for that, as she is a great kid who needs not worry or be worried about the adult life circling around her. I will say military life had prepared her for the separation of her parents so…Go Army on that.

Did the Army do this to you? Well, in many ways the Army did not help, it made life significantly worse and yes, in some ways if I were to blame anyone or anything it is easy to say that the military life did not help. It did not help that when I was working overseas that the job I had with the government was not as sympathetic to the needs of my family. Again, another blog that will come later. The Army life is not for everyone and it certainly was not for us. I am very proud that we served, but do hold anger towards the very thing I have pride for, again for another time.

Serving my country was not suppose to be this hard but is was and the battle ground that was being fought that none of us thought about was the one right here at home, among ourselves.

When you think about it, very few give credit to those who are part of the 1% who lay it on the line; they put everything on the line for country. When I hear about entitlements, I support the troops, or a reporter who is evaluating the value of the troops makes me cringe.

There is no true understanding to the sacrifice that military families make for this country.

But Maddie puts it back into perspective each time she goes to the movies and asks,

“Do you take military discounts?” 

Kid behind the counter, “No, we are trying to get away from doing that.”

Placing her $15.00 on the counter, “No problem, my dad will fight for you anyway.”

Enough said.    

This question came up one day and I was not really sure how to answer. I stopped and thought about what was being asked of me.

I knew that my answer would be a forever thought in the young mind that was asking the question.

When my answer did not come quickly to my lips I thought there was a good place to go to get the answer I was seeking.

Much to the young persons surprise I turned to You tube and played the enclosed video.

Her reaction was much like the students in the video. It has opened up a new world for the two of us and opened up a lot of conversation.

Maybe….it can help you too.

I am not sure about you, but sometimes life sucks.

It throws curve balls that you really do not see coming. You think you have it all together and things are wonderful but somehow…just somehow, this ball comes out of no where and wallops you in the head. Dazed and confused, you stagger back  and wonder, “What the hell just happened.”

In the ruins of your former self you discover that the only thing that has changed from this devastating blow ….is you.

You can cry, be angry or just accept that things will never be the same again and somehow you will find your way back to something that resembles your former self. It can be argued that you needed that change and you were not willing to make it… so…life just made you go thru it. Other times, you may feel that the change is needed and well, you let it happen. Regardless of how, you are not going to be able to go back and try to live the way you formerly did.

You are going to have to accept, move on and just trudge thru the days to somehow find that middle happy ground that lies between the new normal and the old one.

Songs have been written about this and frankly…as I use to sing those songs, I always felt bad for the person who was going thru such a tragic event…never thinking that one day, it would be me. I am glad now that I at least have those songs to guide me thru the lessons learned by others; I have some grounding as oppose to wandering around in the dark hitting walls.

It is truly in your darkest days  you can find new life, new normal and new thoughts of appreciation to help you along with the days to come. An enlightenment of sorts can make you realize that though you think it is the end of the world, you actually have found a world that was always right there in front of you but you never wanted to see. Maybe you were afraid of it, maybe you did not want to work for it…maybe…just maybe…you were scared of it.

Life can suck at times…it blindsides you  and makes you dazed and confused.. that is life.

So…take the life hit and say, “That really hurt.”

Umm…yeah…but you are living.

The golden rule of, ”If  you have nothing nice to say, then do not say anything at all”, seems to have been lost in some distant vault of classic behavior. I truly show my age when I try to explain this “old” phrase to anyone who will blast away comments on social media as if they can be somehow retracted at a later date.

Patiently, I explain that words once released cause a lot of damage and often times can never be retracted or removed. Once words are said, written or oral can come back to haunt.

My age does show  as I continue to try to explain not only to those close to me but to those in my daily walk thru life that caution should be exercised when blasting people. I think that no one wakes up in the morning and decides to say, “Today, I am going to piss someone off and make them feel like crap.” I do believe that life pressures, lack of sleep, frustration or other elements in a person’s life can make them so angry that they can not form the appropriate language to handle  a conversation when they finally run into that last person who happens to just set them off.

Okay, some would argue that some people do not have good, “bedside” manners. Though this can be considered an excuse , it can be argued that some people take things much too personal. While others let it roll off their shoulders. Yes, it can be argued that some people need to learn how to grow a backbone while others need to teach and educate rather than scream and demand.

In a society where social media has taken over whether it be tweeting, face book, name any of them, blasting away your feeling comes first. Then thinking comes after. The words are said. The classic golden rule seems to have been changed to, “Say what you want, apologize later…maybe.”

Respect for others seems to have been tossed aside like a rag. No longer needed, but only used when there is a mess to be picked up.

I do not know about you, but it seems like the golden rule is a good one. A good classic rule that should not be changed or altered. It should be posted everywhere and taught. Acceptance for others may be tolerated better if everyone could somehow grasp the simple lesson of this phrase.

Then again, industries that thrive on mistakes would be out of business, tabloids would go bankrupt and all news channels, talk shows, reality shows, all shows would somehow be out of business not able to employ people because they followed an old rule.

The dilemma facing our society today is not a new one. It is in fact an ongoing social issue that spotlights the ability to show restraint and cultural survival to do what is best for you.

Maybe if we educated others in how to treat people, then maybe, just maybe, this classic golden rule will be able to resurface and take command of how we treat each other.

The again… possibly… I am an old fool, who should take her own advise and not post this.

The golden rule of, ”If  you have nothing nice to say, then do not say anything at all”, seems to have been lost in some distant vault of classic behavior. I truly show my age when I try to explain this “old” phrase to anyone who will blast away comments on social media as if they can be somehow retracted at a later date.

Patiently, I explain that words once released cause a lot of damage and often times can never be retracted or removed. Once words are said, written or oral can come back to haunt.

My age does show  as I continue to try to explain not only to those close to me but to those in my daily walk thru life that caution should be exercised when blasting people. I think that no one wakes up in the morning and decides to say, “Today, I am going to piss someone off and make them feel like crap.” I do believe that life pressures, lack of sleep, frustration or other elements in a person’s life can make them so angry that they can not form the appropriate language to handle  a conversation when they finally run into that last person who happens to just set them off.

Okay, some would argue that some people do not have good, “bedside” manners. Though this can be considered an excuse , it can be argued that some people take things much too personal. While others let it roll off their shoulders. Yes, it can be argued that some people need to learn how to grow a backbone while others need to teach and educate rather than scream and demand.

In a society where social media has taken over whether it be tweeting, face book, name any of them, blasting away your feeling comes first. Then thinking comes after. The words are said. The classic golden rule seems to have been changed to, “Say what you want, apologize later…maybe.”

Respect for others seems to have been tossed aside like a rag. No longer needed, but only used when there is a mess to be picked up.

I do not know about you, but it seems like the golden rule is a good one. A good classic rule that should not be changed or altered. It should be posted everywhere and taught. Acceptance for others may be tolerated better if everyone could somehow grasp the simple lesson of this phrase.

Then again, industries that thrive on mistakes would be out of business, tabloids would go bankrupt and all news channels, talk shows, reality shows, all shows would somehow be out of business not able to employ people because they followed an old rule.

The dilemma facing our society today is not a new one. It is in fact an ongoing social issue that spotlights the ability to show restraint and cultural survival to do what is best for you.

Maybe if we educated others in how to treat people, then maybe, just maybe, this classic golden rule will be able to resurface and take command of how we treat each other.

The again… possibly… I am an old fool, who should take her own advise and not post this.

It came to my attention that I may have been sleeping for a large proportion of my life.  I never intended to sleep away all my years but somehow it happened. Waking up from a dream can be good or bad and now that I am “awake” I see more than I ever saw before, the good and the bad.

When I look back or around I can see the memories, the pictures and recall how I walked throughout the years but can not actually find where I may have met my goals or that I had even tried to reach them.

Now I find myself here in an apartment wondering how I got to this point. It is not that I can not recall how but more importantly…why.

If anything can be learned from the experience of sleeping thru life, I can say I have at least woken up and decided that it is okay that I was sleeping. There are a few people who are no longer with me and that is okay. I think they needed to see that they could be doing something else. That the obligation to watch over me as I slept was not what they should be doing. They need not feel angry, sad, mad or more importantly disappointed for they did what they could, moving on was the right thing to do. Those that are still here with me well, they see that I have become a stronger, better person and are thankful that I “woke up”.

By accepting that I slept so long, one would think that I am well rested. Quite the opposite. I am trying to gain the ground I lost when I was gone away in a dream world. Sometimes I miss that world, sometimes I wish I could somehow go back to the dreams that I had while I slept….

We all know that once you wake up you can never go back….And that is okay, for life has a way of showing you that dreaming is good, that sleeping is okay and while you are sleeping…you can dream of life.

It came to my attention that I may have been sleeping for a large proportion of my life.  I never intended to sleep away all my years but somehow it happened. Waking up from a dream can be good or bad and now that I am “awake” I see more than I ever saw before, the good and the bad.

When I look back or around I can see the memories, the pictures and recall how I walked throughout the years but can not actually find where I may have met my goals or that I had even tried to reach them.

Now I find myself here in an apartment wondering how I got to this point. It is not that I can not recall how but more importantly…why.

If anything can be learned from the experience of sleeping thru life, I can say I have at least woken up and decided that it is okay that I was sleeping. There are a few people who are no longer with me and that is okay. I think they needed to see that they could be doing something else. That the obligation to watch over me as I slept was not what they should be doing. They need not feel angry, sad, mad or more importantly disappointed for they did what they could, moving on was the right thing to do. Those that are still here with me well, they see that I have become a stronger, better person and are thankful that I “woke up”.

By accepting that I slept so long, one would think that I am well rested. Quite the opposite. I am trying to gain the ground I lost when I was gone away in a dream world. Sometimes I miss that world, sometimes I wish I could somehow go back to the dreams that I had while I slept….

We all know that once you wake up you can never go back….And that is okay, for life has a way of showing you that dreaming is good, that sleeping is okay and while you are sleeping…you can dream of life.

I love my dog Lyndie, she is the best dog in the world. I am sure that every owner of a dog says that…and yes, they are all correct.

Lately though, I have not been the best owner. I must admit that while standing at the window watching the snow blow all around I am not at all excited to bundle up and take her for a walk. She though, looks out the window, and sees something totally different; I wish I knew what she saw. Watching her tail wagging crazy, I roll my eyes and realize no matter how much I wish someone else could walk her, I need to take her out. Snow or no snow, I must go so I go to the closet, grab my coat and start the bundling process.

Maybe this time the wind will not be blowing so hard, it might not be all that bad out there, forget wearing socks, just put the boots on are all thoughts that race thru my head as she dances around pulling on her leash to get me to hurry up and get dress.

I wish I lived in a house, it would be so much easier to let her out. It would only be a quick opening of a door to a fenced in yard and then a quick call back to the door. But no, I live on the third floor of an apartment building complex. I know that there are other owners and every dog thinks they own the place. Dog fights are common and yes,  you would be happy to know, my Lyndie is always the winner. This little factoid does not make us popular among the other dog families in the community and well, I am constantly trying to dodge other owners.

See, Lyndie is the top dog, a protector and really does not want other dogs approaching us. She is a single kind of dog. No matter how many times I tell other owners to keep their dogs a safe comfortable distance they always seem to think that they have a better understanding of what is best.  It use to bother me beyond belief that they would not listen but now I just let Lyndie go at it.  And well, the other owner and the dog learn quickly that they were wrong.

So, when I get dress I am thinking about what other owner might be walking by the door, may be outside and well, socks may be the best idea, as my feet will really get cold.

With Lyndie biting her leash, me all set to go and yes, making sure I have the keys to get back in the building, I venture out the door into the hallway and down the stairs. Each minute wondering what will this walk bring.  Most walks are uneventful because I try to go out when I know other owners would not even be thinking about going out.

I bet they are looking out the window and instead of getting a coat on, pull the blinds.

I love my dog Lyndie, she is the best dog in the world. I am sure that every owner of a dog says that…and yes, they are all correct.

Lately though, I have not been the best owner. I must admit that while standing at the window watching the snow blow all around I am not at all excited to bundle up and take her for a walk. She though, looks out the window, and sees something totally different; I wish I knew what she saw. Watching her tail wagging crazy, I roll my eyes and realize no matter how much I wish someone else could walk her, I need to take her out. Snow or no snow, I must go so I go to the closet, grab my coat and start the bundling process.

Maybe this time the wind will not be blowing so hard, it might not be all that bad out there, forget wearing socks, just put the boots on are all thoughts that race thru my head as she dances around pulling on her leash to get me to hurry up and get dress.

I wish I lived in a house, it would be so much easier to let her out. It would only be a quick opening of a door to a fenced in yard and then a quick call back to the door. But no, I live on the third floor of an apartment building complex. I know that there are other owners and every dog thinks they own the place. Dog fights are common and yes,  you would be happy to know, my Lyndie is always the winner. This little factoid does not make us popular among the other dog families in the community and well, I am constantly trying to dodge other owners.

See, Lyndie is the top dog, a protector and really does not want other dogs approaching us. She is a single kind of dog. No matter how many times I tell other owners to keep their dogs a safe comfortable distance they always seem to think that they have a better understanding of what is best.  It use to bother me beyond belief that they would not listen but now I just let Lyndie go at it.  And well, the other owner and the dog learn quickly that they were wrong.

So, when I get dress I am thinking about what other owner might be walking by the door, may be outside and well, socks may be the best idea, as my feet will really get cold.

With Lyndie biting her leash, me all set to go and yes, making sure I have the keys to get back in the building, I venture out the door into the hallway and down the stairs. Each minute wondering what will this walk bring.  Most walks are uneventful because I try to go out when I know other owners would not even be thinking about going out.

I bet they are looking out the window and instead of getting a coat on, pull the blinds.

The New Year has brought so much change. Over the last year Cupid’s arrow seemed to stray away from the foundation of a long-term relationship. Just like the crazy course we had taken, his arrow seemed to have missed its mark, splintered under the stresses that life brings. It is not that he is to blame. Maybe, he too, was lost with all the changes that had been made. Another thought, could be that the roads that were traveled did not allow for him to find us amongst the road blocks and detours. It could be that Cupid did not have a GPS.

Blame it on Cupid could be easy. To blame someone would be a great way to finger point. Cupid knew what was going on. Enough said on that…..

To remember a loved one, to reminisce about the good times could lead to depression on this day. BUT it also can allow for the birth of a new love. Cupid will always find a way to shoot his arrow and all you need to do is be open to its placement on your heart.

So, on this day when many are upset that they do not have a “loved one” to share the day with may in someway be missing out. Just take a moment and walk with me on this thought, love comes in many ways. The smile you give to an older women, the gesture of, go ahead of me in line or maybe it is as simple as saying thank you to the person who helped you today. Being nice, giving a hug, smiling at someone or just plain old being nice can lift the spirit of most anyone.

So…on this day. Valentines day. Let Cupid do his work, marvel in his ability to shoot arrows and know that he will always find you.

The New Year has brought so much change. Over the last year Cupid’s arrow seemed to stray away from the foundation of a long-term relationship. Just like the crazy course we had taken, his arrow seemed to have missed its mark, splintered under the stresses that life brings. It is not that he is to blame. Maybe, he too, was lost with all the changes that had been made. Another thought, could be that the roads that were traveled did not allow for him to find us amongst the road blocks and detours. It could be that Cupid did not have a GPS.

Blame it on Cupid could be easy. To blame someone would be a great way to finger point. Cupid knew what was going on. Enough said on that…..

To remember a loved one, to reminisce about the good times could lead to depression on this day. BUT it also can allow for the birth of a new love. Cupid will always find a way to shoot his arrow and all you need to do is be open to its placement on your heart.

So, on this day when many are upset that they do not have a “loved one” to share the day with may in someway be missing out. Just take a moment and walk with me on this thought, love comes in many ways. The smile you give to an older women, the gesture of, go ahead of me in line or maybe it is as simple as saying thank you to the person who helped you today. Being nice, giving a hug, smiling at someone or just plain old being nice can lift the spirit of most anyone.

So…on this day. Valentines day. Let Cupid do his work, marvel in his ability to shoot arrows and know that he will always find you.

Here’s the Thing…going back to work delays blogs…working retail pretty much takes up all the time you once had…but, I now have a ton of new stories to post in 2014, like fires outside the store…dogs that stroll in like customers.. people who are straight up crazy and what in the world are Americans thinking….after a spell of knock out sleep, I will be back with stories that will make you laugh, cry and wonder…see ya in 2014…Happy New Year…..
Now…off to sleep to recover from retail mania!

Here’s the Thing…going back to work delays blogs…working retail pretty much takes up all the time you once had…but, I now have a ton of new stories to post in 2014, like fires outside the store…dogs that stroll in like customers.. people who are straight up crazy and what in the world are Americans thinking….after a spell of knock out sleep, I will be back with stories that will make you laugh, cry and wonder…see ya in 2014…Happy New Year…..
Now…off to sleep to recover from retail mania!

Today is way too hot to be doing anything but reflect on how time goes by way too fast. I have tried to sit down and write about our new time back in the States but somehow something always pulls me away before I can post what I have written. Guess what, I have a lot of drafts to finish.

So, I thought that since the heat has caused me to stay inside I would try to post something here.

Many people have recently asked me, ” How does it feel to be back in the United States?”

My response varies considerably depending on the day. Some days I am thrilled to be Home while others, usually after being flipped off by some angry driver, I wish I had stayed in Europe.

Today was one of those days. It is way too hot to be yelling at someone when driving. Okay, maybe I was going the speed limit and you were in a hurry to get to God knows where and you were more important than following the road speed.

Then again, maybe you were trying to get to the hospital because someone there was sent there by ambulance because they had an accident on the very road you were flipping me off on.

Okay, maybe I am glad to be Home in the States because here, we have the freedom to be truly who we are….God Bless the USA.

Today is way too hot to be doing anything but reflect on how time goes by way too fast. I have tried to sit down and write about our new time back in the States but somehow something always pulls me away before I can post what I have written. Guess what, I have a lot of drafts to finish.

So, I thought that since the heat has caused me to stay inside I would try to post something here.

Many people have recently asked me, ” How does it feel to be back in the United States?”

My response varies considerably depending on the day. Some days I am thrilled to be Home while others, usually after being flipped off by some angry driver, I wish I had stayed in Europe.

Today was one of those days. It is way too hot to be yelling at someone when driving. Okay, maybe I was going the speed limit and you were in a hurry to get to God knows where and you were more important than following the road speed.

Then again, maybe you were trying to get to the hospital because someone there was sent there by ambulance because they had an accident on the very road you were flipping me off on.

Okay, maybe I am glad to be Home in the States because here, we have the freedom to be truly who we are….God Bless the USA.

It has been way too long since I have written, anything. I am sitting here counting on my fingers to see how many actual days it has ben since coming back the US; 2 months and a few days. The time seems to be moving by so fast that I can not seem to catch up. I have learned to rely on Dunkin donuts coffee to give me the needed push and move faster mentality that seems to dominate the New England area. I was reminded that New Englanders are full of coffee and sarcasm and they live up to that comment.

There have been so many changes and new things to learn but on the other hand we have been trying to get use to things that never seem to change. I know, crazy, a little bit of seeing new places, stores, malls, and  learning where things are but there also a feeling of, “Oh yeah, I remember that” and may favorite, “Really, I can only write a check.” I have not written a check in 3 1/2 years and I do not even have any.

So, the confusion of trying to find a house, try to get use to a new way a living and all the things that come along with that process I am finally feeling comfortable.

With that said, I wish that there were a few things that I could explain to those that live among me in my new area. Do you really have to tailgate me, even in the slow lane? I mean seriously, I am going 65 mph and you seem to either want to join me in my car and have a conversation with me or you really need to get off the exit to go to the bathroom.  Later,  I learned that neither was the right answer. Going 65 mph was too slow and they wanted to get there before someone else did.  I thought maybe they just wanted to read my plates as they were the same ones I used overseas and looked funny among the Patriot frame license plates of Massachusetts. Some people did want to read my plates and they were the ones I would just slow down so they could see them. I found in my rearview mirror one too many drivers leaning way over the steering wheel just trying to catch a glimpse of my plate. Then there were the stalkers, those that would follow me into the parking lot and park near by. As I would get out of my car, they would shout over to me, ” Hey, where are you from, those plates look weird.” It always amazed me how much space they would have between the two of us. It just reminded me that they really must feel safer in the car and not meeting face to face an actual person.

I considered making up stories like, I am from the royal family on vacation but when it came right down to it, they really did not care. They just wanted to know why the plates looked different.

That brings me to the point of everything is different now and we need to adjust to the changes in people, places and things that go on around us. None of it is easy but much of it has been amusing.

One thing is for sure, Coffee is very important, Dunkin Donuts truly has a presence and there are very few people who do not “Run on Dunkins“

I guess the phrase I was given that New Englanders run on 2 things Coffee and sarcasm, they were right on.

Which reminds me, I need to go out and get another  cup of coffee, I am all out.

It has been way too long since I have written, anything. I am sitting here counting on my fingers to see how many actual days it has ben since coming back the US; 2 months and a few days. The time seems to be moving by so fast that I can not seem to catch up. I have learned to rely on Dunkin donuts coffee to give me the needed push and move faster mentality that seems to dominate the New England area. I was reminded that New Englanders are full of coffee and sarcasm and they live up to that comment.

There have been so many changes and new things to learn but on the other hand we have been trying to get use to things that never seem to change. I know, crazy, a little bit of seeing new places, stores, malls, and  learning where things are but there also a feeling of, “Oh yeah, I remember that” and may favorite, “Really, I can only write a check.” I have not written a check in 3 1/2 years and I do not even have any.

So, the confusion of trying to find a house, try to get use to a new way a living and all the things that come along with that process I am finally feeling comfortable.

With that said, I wish that there were a few things that I could explain to those that live among me in my new area. Do you really have to tailgate me, even in the slow lane? I mean seriously, I am going 65 mph and you seem to either want to join me in my car and have a conversation with me or you really need to get off the exit to go to the bathroom.  Later,  I learned that neither was the right answer. Going 65 mph was too slow and they wanted to get there before someone else did.  I thought maybe they just wanted to read my plates as they were the same ones I used overseas and looked funny among the Patriot frame license plates of Massachusetts. Some people did want to read my plates and they were the ones I would just slow down so they could see them. I found in my rearview mirror one too many drivers leaning way over the steering wheel just trying to catch a glimpse of my plate. Then there were the stalkers, those that would follow me into the parking lot and park near by. As I would get out of my car, they would shout over to me, ” Hey, where are you from, those plates look weird.” It always amazed me how much space they would have between the two of us. It just reminded me that they really must feel safer in the car and not meeting face to face an actual person.

I considered making up stories like, I am from the royal family on vacation but when it came right down to it, they really did not care. They just wanted to know why the plates looked different.

That brings me to the point of everything is different now and we need to adjust to the changes in people, places and things that go on around us. None of it is easy but much of it has been amusing.

One thing is for sure, Coffee is very important, Dunkin Donuts truly has a presence and there are very few people who do not “Run on Dunkins“

I guess the phrase I was given that New Englanders run on 2 things Coffee and sarcasm, they were right on.

Which reminds me, I need to go out and get another  cup of coffee, I am all out.

I never thought the day would come that I would be sitting here writing to you  about how we made it home. It really did not hit me until we were on the plane, cruising along when the Captain said, ” We are entering American airspace, welcome to the United States of America“. I did not expect the tears of excitement that we flowing down my face as I stared out the window of the plane.

We had been planning this for months, dare I say ever since we got to Germany we  had been planning on our trip back to the States. There is just something about being in your own country. I know that if you have been reading this blog that we really enjoyed being in Europe, we traveled, we learned new stuff and even got frustrated with a few things. Overall, we enjoyed being in Europe but coming home just felt right.

I only had one concern, “Would we still like it? It had been told to us that things had changed…a lot. Even still, it did not matter, we would figure it out and enjoy.

I am not sure if it was the jet lag or just the excitement we had but we were smiling, laughing and commenting back and forth to each other how different, wonderful and refreshing it was to be walking in Boston’s Logan Airport. For starters, we could read all the signs, the English language never looked better. I even started to listen in on a conversation that was going on next to me as we walked. I smiled, I could understand every word and frankly decided for them the outcome of their situation. I never reveled that I was ease dropping.

When I saw our name on the sign from the car company that was picking us up, I was thinking about how different our life was starting to become. Some may ask as they read this, “You had a car company pick you up?”  Yes, we did as we, my daughter and I, were not moving forward to the next Army installation. We were not going to be a part of the Army system, we were truly going back home to the life we had before we became a part of this Army adventure. Michael would be going on  to finish out his time.

With teenage daughter and Lyndie, the dog in tow, we started to go to the car. Michael, was getting a connecting flight to New York helped the driver of the car and us pile the luggage, crate, and us into the  black SUV. The smell of the leather seats made me close my eye as I reflected on our new situation.

While driving we broke out into conversation with the driver and his assistant. They were laughing at us. Madison was shrieking in delight with the sight of multiple malls along the highway.   Our conversation turned into a tour of the area as we were traveling to our new home, a local hotel where we would be calling home for a few weeks prior to finding a more permanent home.   It seemed so surreal as I watched American flags flutter in the breeze over a building or two. It was as if I had come home to visit an old friend that had grown up but never really changed all that much. A friend that seemed happy to see me home.

With all the excitement we had arrived at the hotel way too soon. All I remember was Madison saying was how she wanted to go here and there, then back to here….. all I could see was the flag hanging from the flag pole in the front of the hotel. Fluttering as if to say, “Welcome home.”

I smiled, told Madison we will go everywhere she wanted to go but tonight we sleep.

I never thought the day would come that I would be sitting here writing to you  about how we made it home. It really did not hit me until we were on the plane, cruising along when the Captain said, ” We are entering American airspace, welcome to the United States of America“. I did not expect the tears of excitement that we flowing down my face as I stared out the window of the plane.

We had been planning this for months, dare I say ever since we got to Germany we  had been planning on our trip back to the States. There is just something about being in your own country. I know that if you have been reading this blog that we really enjoyed being in Europe, we traveled, we learned new stuff and even got frustrated with a few things. Overall, we enjoyed being in Europe but coming home just felt right.

I only had one concern, “Would we still like it? It had been told to us that things had changed…a lot. Even still, it did not matter, we would figure it out and enjoy.

I am not sure if it was the jet lag or just the excitement we had but we were smiling, laughing and commenting back and forth to each other how different, wonderful and refreshing it was to be walking in Boston’s Logan Airport. For starters, we could read all the signs, the English language never looked better. I even started to listen in on a conversation that was going on next to me as we walked. I smiled, I could understand every word and frankly decided for them the outcome of their situation. I never reveled that I was ease dropping.

When I saw our name on the sign from the car company that was picking us up, I was thinking about how different our life was starting to become. Some may ask as they read this, “You had a car company pick you up?”  Yes, we did as we, my daughter and I, were not moving forward to the next Army installation. We were not going to be a part of the Army system, we were truly going back home to the life we had before we became a part of this Army adventure. Michael would be going on  to finish out his time.

With teenage daughter and Lyndie, the dog in tow, we started to go to the car. Michael, was getting a connecting flight to New York helped the driver of the car and us pile the luggage, crate, and us into the  black SUV. The smell of the leather seats made me close my eye as I reflected on our new situation.

While driving we broke out into conversation with the driver and his assistant. They were laughing at us. Madison was shrieking in delight with the sight of multiple malls along the highway.   Our conversation turned into a tour of the area as we were traveling to our new home, a local hotel where we would be calling home for a few weeks prior to finding a more permanent home.   It seemed so surreal as I watched American flags flutter in the breeze over a building or two. It was as if I had come home to visit an old friend that had grown up but never really changed all that much. A friend that seemed happy to see me home.

With all the excitement we had arrived at the hotel way too soon. All I remember was Madison saying was how she wanted to go here and there, then back to here….. all I could see was the flag hanging from the flag pole in the front of the hotel. Fluttering as if to say, “Welcome home.”

I smiled, told Madison we will go everywhere she wanted to go but tonight we sleep.

We filled six cargo crates and now living with borrowed furniture. There are suitcases filled with clothes and we are eating off of paper plates. We have shipped a car and have another one for a few more weeks before it heads back to the States.  We are exhausted.

Exhausted would be an understatement but as many other faithful military family wives have said to me,” The light at the end of the tunnel is here, cheer up.”  It made me stop and think about the families that do this as a career. They move all the time, every three years to zig zag around the world to serve our country. They do it with kids, animals and husbands who sometimes are heading off to the latest war. It made me wonder, how many people really realize what goes on within the military family unit?

It is truly a way of life. One that is full of ups and downs that can not be defined or explained to someone who has not been there or lived the experience.  I never really gave it much thought before we, I mean, he, signed up to serve in the Army.

And that brings me to the point of, when he serves, the family serves too. We are subjected to the ups and downs of deployments, changing of duty stations (PCS) and all that goes along with being uprooted from family, friends and even ones own country.

Frankly, it has not been easy and in many ways I am extremely grateful to have had this experience but am really looking forward to going home  in more ways than one. Home means that we will no longer be subject to the ways of the Military. I do not have to wake up to bullets being shot at ranges that are near by, hearing mortars that make the houses shake, seeing soldiers everyday running in formation and chanting while running PT (physical fitness) at 5:30am, trying to negotiate driving behind a convoy of stykers or military vehicle’s, learning military time ( which I never really got), showing ID’s at checkpoints  or standing at attention facing the flag at 1700 (5:00pm) everyday.   I also will not have to watch the busses of soldiers leave in the morning going to war and knowing that some may not return, will not need to learn how to explain to my daughter that some of her friends dads/moms are not coming home, that I had a special letter for her in the dresser draw in case I get a visit telling me her Dad is gone. I can stop worrying about being blackout from the internet and wonder who was just injured, hurt or killed. Better yet, I will not have to go to another funeral. I will not have to worry about getting a speeding ticket on post and have it affect my husband. Mostly I will be able to go about doing what ever I want, where ever I want because I live in a free country, I live in the United States.

How do I go about thanking all those who have helped me go though this experience?

How do I tell them that the kind words, the help, the smiles and patience they had for me truly made me see a small picture of a world that so many judge, justify or do not even acknowledge exists?

All I can say to them is THANK YOU! It  is simple, pure and full on the love that the words are meant to share.  I know that I will see some of them again, somewhere, either on face book, on television, in person or by chance. I have built a new family  that shares a special bond .

With a tear in my eye and pride in my heart, I am grateful for them and the great nation they serve.

There is light at the end of the tunnel.

We filled six cargo crates and now living with borrowed furniture. There are suitcases filled with clothes and we are eating off of paper plates. We have shipped a car and have another one for a few more weeks before it heads back to the States.  We are exhausted.

Exhausted would be an understatement but as many other faithful military family wives have said to me,” The light at the end of the tunnel is here, cheer up.”  It made me stop and think about the families that do this as a career. They move all the time, every three years to zig zag around the world to serve our country. They do it with kids, animals and husbands who sometimes are heading off to the latest war. It made me wonder, how many people really realize what goes on within the military family unit?

It is truly a way of life. One that is full of ups and downs that can not be defined or explained to someone who has not been there or lived the experience.  I never really gave it much thought before we, I mean, he, signed up to serve in the Army.

And that brings me to the point of, when he serves, the family serves too. We are subjected to the ups and downs of deployments, changing of duty stations (PCS) and all that goes along with being uprooted from family, friends and even ones own country.

Frankly, it has not been easy and in many ways I am extremely grateful to have had this experience but am really looking forward to going home  in more ways than one. Home means that we will no longer be subject to the ways of the Military. I do not have to wake up to bullets being shot at ranges that are near by, hearing mortars that make the houses shake, seeing soldiers everyday running in formation and chanting while running PT (physical fitness) at 5:30am, trying to negotiate driving behind a convoy of stykers or military vehicle’s, learning military time ( which I never really got), showing ID’s at checkpoints  or standing at attention facing the flag at 1700 (5:00pm) everyday.   I also will not have to watch the busses of soldiers leave in the morning going to war and knowing that some may not return, will not need to learn how to explain to my daughter that some of her friends dads/moms are not coming home, that I had a special letter for her in the dresser draw in case I get a visit telling me her Dad is gone. I can stop worrying about being blackout from the internet and wonder who was just injured, hurt or killed. Better yet, I will not have to go to another funeral. I will not have to worry about getting a speeding ticket on post and have it affect my husband. Mostly I will be able to go about doing what ever I want, where ever I want because I live in a free country, I live in the United States.

How do I go about thanking all those who have helped me go though this experience?

How do I tell them that the kind words, the help, the smiles and patience they had for me truly made me see a small picture of a world that so many judge, justify or do not even acknowledge exists?

All I can say to them is THANK YOU! It  is simple, pure and full on the love that the words are meant to share.  I know that I will see some of them again, somewhere, either on face book, on television, in person or by chance. I have built a new family  that shares a special bond .

With a tear in my eye and pride in my heart, I am grateful for them and the great nation they serve.

There is light at the end of the tunnel.

I relish in the fact that I am a patient person. I would even go so far as to say it is a strength of mine but lately it seems as if I have lost the ability to be…patient.

I have learned that when someone says something and they may be TOTALLY wrong, you listen and do not question it. If you do question it do it at your own peril. Sometimes it is not the fact that they are wrong but that you should just listen to them, accept the answer and then wait to see how it plays out. It generally goes back on the right course and the emotional feeling of frustration and feeling of,” Are you really …” (you fill the blank), goes away.

I have found that it is generally the space between being calm and going totally nuts is where the trouble begins. I am not someone to sit by and just let things happen, I am a fixer, a problem solver of sorts. I will add this is a very important skill  to have as it guides me through the biggest complications in life BUT even the most logical answer to an issue needs to be filled with calm and NO emotion.

Emotion, that human quality  can get us all in trouble. I am amazed at how it can cloud judgment and create a fire storm that swirls up like a tornado in the flat lands of the Unites States.  Like a tornado, emotion throws debris everywhere and lashes out at even the most innocent of bystanders. Now the original issue of concern takes on more problems and it grows from there; a so on and so on scenario.  Its path creates havoc on everything. Nothing is safe from its fiery and destructive path.

Here’s the thing….life in the military is constantly changing and one has to get use to that fact. It is good to be emotional but try to sound the warning signal before the actual tornado comes swirling. Let people close by have the chance to calm the storm before it brews. Most likely they will not be emotionally attached to the storm. Listening to what they have to say  might save you from causing a path of irreversible destruction.

Eventually it stops and in the silence of the aftermath the rebuilding can begin. Cue sunshine and clear skies.

I relish in the fact that I am a patient person. I would even go so far as to say it is a strength of mine but lately it seems as if I have lost the ability to be…patient.

I have learned that when someone says something and they may be TOTALLY wrong, you listen and do not question it. If you do question it do it at your own peril. Sometimes it is not the fact that they are wrong but that you should just listen to them, accept the answer and then wait to see how it plays out. It generally goes back on the right course and the emotional feeling of frustration and feeling of,” Are you really …” (you fill the blank), goes away.

I have found that it is generally the space between being calm and going totally nuts is where the trouble begins. I am not someone to sit by and just let things happen, I am a fixer, a problem solver of sorts. I will add this is a very important skill  to have as it guides me through the biggest complications in life BUT even the most logical answer to an issue needs to be filled with calm and NO emotion.

Emotion, that human quality  can get us all in trouble. I am amazed at how it can cloud judgment and create a fire storm that swirls up like a tornado in the flat lands of the Unites States.  Like a tornado, emotion throws debris everywhere and lashes out at even the most innocent of bystanders. Now the original issue of concern takes on more problems and it grows from there; a so on and so on scenario.  Its path creates havoc on everything. Nothing is safe from its fiery and destructive path.

Here’s the thing….life in the military is constantly changing and one has to get use to that fact. It is good to be emotional but try to sound the warning signal before the actual tornado comes swirling. Let people close by have the chance to calm the storm before it brews. Most likely they will not be emotionally attached to the storm. Listening to what they have to say  might save you from causing a path of irreversible destruction.

Eventually it stops and in the silence of the aftermath the rebuilding can begin. Cue sunshine and clear skies.