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Waiting to Forget
Sheila Kelly Welch
middle grade

Because of the age of the protagonist, I've tagged this as middle grade, as did the publisher, namelos; however, it seems wise and fair to point out that this is the story of a current day child-survivor of abuse and neglect. This isn't a light read. It's tough. It's a great book for talking through and exploring emotions, but I wouldn't send a child off to read this alone.

Basic plot: T.J.'s little sister, Angela, fell from the second story balcony into the entryway of their new adopted parent's home. While T.J. waits at the hospital to find out if his sister will be all right, he tells their story in flashback. It's a heartrending account of a mother who neglects her children, has a string of boyfriends, some nice and some less than nice, that ultimately lead her to abandoning her kids to follow her man, who has abused the children. The children then cycle through various foster homes until they're adopted. The transition to a new home is difficult, wrought with feelings of guilt and distrust and the fear of loving anyone again.

The story alternates between present tense for the here and now and past for the story leading up to the hospital. For a young reader, changing tense can be confusing. Yet another aspect of the story that makes it well-suited for group reading and discussion.

As I was reading this book, I asked myself many times "what's the point" of a story of this nature. I'll readily admit, I'm sometimes a bit slow in getting it when it comes to gritty fiction about scarring abuse for a young audience. I faced a similar paradox with the aspect of double dead parents in my own middle grade, Dragon Wishes. For me, the theme felt too heavy as a stand alone. Thus I added a second story to the first, a fantasy, that broke up the heaviness of the main, present day story, while intertwining with it to push plot forward. That was my personal choice because the topic, death of both parents, just felt too heavy all by itself for a young audience. In Waiting to Forget, there is no break from reality. The distant past is painful, the recent past is jumbled and painful, and the present is scary painful. Angela may die.

Is this a story worth telling? Absolutely. However, it's probably one that's best read and shared together for the story to have its true effect, i.e. helping children either to cope with abuse in their lives or to understand abuse and its effects on their peers.

For other great reads, hop on over to Barrie Summy's site. They're in full bloom!

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The ivory tower is granting me a one day pass to go out and see the real world. The things good behavior will get you!

GLEE!

I'm being let out to speak at Oklahoma's school librarian conference, EncycloMedia. I'm excited. Thrilled. And a little nervous. Okay... a lot nervous. I'll be out with real people. I have to talk. I have to talk intelligently, in complete sentences, with no editing, about my middle grade novel, Dragon Wishes. I have to sound like I do this regularly. But all I've done for weeks now is sit in the ivory tower with my imaginary friends - and a few dead writers - and write. My social skills have sort of fallen by the wayside. Ask my kids. My husband. My dog, even.

Fortunately, should my skills waver, I'll be in amazing company and so hopefully no one will notice. I'm speaking with Eileen Cook, What Would Emma Do, Cynthea Liu, Paris Pan Takes the Dare, Jenny Meyerhoff, Third Grade Baby, and Suzanne Morgan Williams, Bull Rider.

We're followed the next day by P.J. Hoover, The Navel of the World, Jessica Anderson, Border Crossing, Barrie Summy, I So Don't Do Spooky, Donna St. Cyr, The Cheese Syndicate, and Zu Vincent, The Lucky Place.

Beforehand, we're being interviewed for a televised program that the Metropolitan Library of Oklahoma broadcasts throughout the state. Please, please, please let my hair cooperate so that I look like someone who actually styles her hair every once in a while, rather than pulling it back in a haphazard ponytail because dead writers and fictitious characters don't care what your hair looks like. And after that, there is a luncheon with librarians. Gulp. Can I carry on a coherent conversation for a whole hour? Or will I get that far off, I-have-an-idea look and start scribbling on my napkin? Librarians will understand if I do, right?

Maybe after all of that real world experience, I'll be ready to lock myself away in the ivory tower again, but I have a feeling, it'll be the other way around. I used to be a pretty social person, some time in the distant past...I think. Either way, I think that seeing, talking and interacting in a spontaneous way with real live people who don't need me to edit their dialogue could be, what's the word?

Oh wait, I know...FUN!

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Has your son or daughter ever followed you around the house repeating every single word, gesture, expression of yours? Or have you seen your children do it to each other with the secret desire of driving each other nuts, and, of course, succeeding?

Imitation is the best form of flattery, they say. But what about when it's involuntary?

You might be a writer if...you're a better parrot than your kids.

Most writers will admit pretty quickly that inspiration for their characters sometimes comes from quirky aspects of their own personalities, emotions they've been through, even kids they knew when they were growing up, or know now. We writers do pilfer on occasion, which I disclaimed on a while back. But what about when it boomerangs back on us and we start imitating our own characters?

When I'm revising heavy sections of a work (this happened with Dragon Wishes), I sometimes go through a low myself, carrying the emotional weight of my characters around with me after I turn off the computer. It's not so fun, perhaps necessary to make good writing into unforgettable writing (or at least decent writing), but not one of my more favorite forms of imitation.

It's not the only form, though. Oh, no. Not even close.

I'm working on a YA set in late 19th century New Zealand, and have been for the last 13 months. I've eaten, slept, drank, read, written and pretty much been in 19th century New Zealand for over a year. I even went to the modern day version for real in November 2008. I really did my research. Really went to live in the moment. It was well beyond 'imitation.' It bordered on total immersion. The imitation came later.

I started saying, "eh" at the end of my sentences. I have to say, it is a Canadian thing. Only, I'm not from Canadian, so I wasn't exactly sure why I was suddenly doing it. And I couldn't stop. My husband teased me about it. My daughers laughed. But it was my seven year old who got to the heart of the matter in perfect, no-nonsense kid fashion.

"I like how you talk like Charlie now," she said one afternoon after my umpteenth "eh" that day.

Charlie?

Who? What was she talking about?

Then it hit me. Charlie Mueller, the salty lighthouse keeper in my novel (Like any slightly obsessed writer, I've read my novel to my kids). Charlie's got this great "ye aren't the fastest ship in the harbor, are ye, laddie" kind of brogue accent. I really love writing his dialogue. I guess I love it so much, I started imitating it.

So what does all of this mean? Imitation is an occupational hazard?

I bet my kids would love to use that on me. "I have to imitate you, Mama. That's what kids do. It's an occupational hazard of being a kid."

How many moms would by that one? I know I wouldn't. Parroting really gets old after a while.

Uh-oh.

Does this mean my kids can threaten to send me to my room if I don't stop parroting Charlie right now?

I'm in trouble.

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Ooh, after the week I've had with babysitter woes, I have really been looking forward to my Friday post where I get to let my hair down, sit back, and ponder the inane, quirky habits of that ecelectic species, writer.

This week's spotlight gelled for me in a dream last night. I haven't had the best luck with working things out in the subconscious before, but man, last night, the stars must have aligned because when I woke up, what I dreamt actually made sense.

You might be a writer if...you swoon for writers like they were rock stars.

I mean the Leif Garrett/David Cassidy kind of swooning, where your heart gets up to some crazy erratic pace and your head feels so hot, you think you might lift off the ground or explode. Yep, that's what great writing does for writers.

Sound melodramatic?

Okay, maybe just a little, but what writer hasn't had that moment when a turn of phrase in a piece stopped them dead in their tracks. Where they sat there, saying it out loud, letting the words roll and bump across their lips as they savored the flavor of great writing.

And then became insanely curious to learn about the person who wrote that. So much so you, say, maybe googled them? Checked out their wikipedia page? Looked for interviews. Driven by the haunting memory of that amazing combination of letters and sounds that became greater than the sum of its parts.

I know. I'm swooning again.

I didn't used to swoon so for writers, not before I became one. I always read a lot, tons, but honestly, I wasn't all that into remembering author names. It was all about book titles, or even more simply, the story itself.

Now that I am a writer, now that I'm constantly working to improve my craft, I've become a closetcase fan of other writers. Then again, it may only be me who thinks my curiosity and interest is secret. I've seen my friends give me that funny look when I start going on and on and on about how I'd love to have Markus Zusak and his family over for a grill party. Kids would be playing on the swing set (I have no idea if he has kids. I do.) Spouses would get along great. And we'd talk about whatever. Not necessarily books, but life. I mean, who wouldn't want to kibbutz a little with the person who wrote:

As it turned out, Ilsa Hermann not only gave Liesel Meminger a book that day. She also gave her a reason to spend time in the basement - her favorite place, first with Papa, then Max. She gave her a reason to write her own words, to see that words had also brought her to life.
"Don't punish yourself," she heard her say again, but there would be punishment and pain, and there would be happiness too. That was writing.

Do you have a lighter lit and are waving it in the air like me? I mean, gees, that's just one line. The whole rest of the book is just as strong.

Zusak is just one example on my ever growing list of authors I'd love to meet and talk with. I don't mean interview talk. I mean Paris, early 20th century, Picasso taking on Modigliani talk. I mean, Hemingway vs. Fitzgerald. You know, arguing and debating, chewing and reforming and rewriting what makes good art in a seedy bar with a good French wine. They argued. They debated. They drank. They lived. They created. They changed the world.

God, what a time that must have been. An unending concert of ideas matching pitch and being reworked into something new and brilliant.

I'm swooning just thinking about it.

*****On a very little side note to rising fame and writer fortune, my book, Dragon Wishes, was an Honorable Mention in the San Francisco Book Festival this week. I feel like a rocker who's finally playing decent venues. Hopefully, one day, it'll be the Met.

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2k8: Writing is hard. Publishing is harder. On this last day of Stacy A. Nyikos' launch week, let's find out what she struggled with.

Stacy: The hardest part about writing and publishing DRAGON WISHES was the emotion that went into it. I revealed on Tuesday that the story emerged after a near fatal sledding accident my daughters were in. They healed, but I didn’t. I went through all of the stages of grief – which, on a good day, I thought was just plain wrong. They were still alive. I didn’t want to think about what would have happened if they had died. But think about it I did. It haunted me.

Writing out the emotions was the only way I could work through them. That proved rather difficult since I’d sworn off writing, and I’m not much for journaling. At some point, nearing the edge of my sanity, I forced myself to sit back down and take the overwhelming emotion of loss and turn it on its head. What would it be like for a child to go through this? I’m an adult. I’m supposed to be trained by life itself to deal with loss. But a child? What would a child do?

That idea loosened my silent pen. I would turn my loss and fear around. I’d write a story, one that could be a beacon to kids going through the overwhelming craziness of loss that I’d gone through.

2k8: So, then did the story come quickly or slowly?

Stacy: The ideas for the story came pretty quickly, and the writing part went relatively smoothly. It was the revising that was a battle. My critique group pushed me to do better, like all critique groups do. I am indebted to them. Alone, I don’t think I could have done it because they forced me to take on the most difficult scenes – when Alex has to let somebody love her again or drown in her own feelings of loss – and write them until they ached with my main character’s struggles. It made the story so much stronger, but I was a real bear to live with when I was revising certain scenes. I could have thought of a million places I would have rather have been – childbirth, a lecture on international political economics, watching paint dry – than in those emotions, trying to shape them into something positive.

At times, I wondered if I hadn’t actually jumped off the deep end. Who in their right mind tries to shape the emotions of loss? Aren’t we just supposed to figure out how to survive them?



2k8: Now DRAGON WISHES is a real book sitting on the shelf. The writing and revising are behind you. How do you feel?

Stacy: In the end, the story became one I’m really proud of. My characters emotions are real. They are at times raw. The rawness gives them an unmistakable authenticity that I very much hope helps kids dealing with loss find their own path through the darkness.

2k8: Stacy, it's been a great launch week. We've all enjoyed getting to know you better. Thank you so much for sharing. We wish you the very very best in your writing career. We know it's going to soar.

To read an excerpt of DRAGON WISHES, click here.

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We're back for Day 4 with Stacy A. Nyikos, debut author of the middle-grade fantasy DRAGON WISHES.

Stacy's gotten really comfortable on the blog. So, today, we're handing the mic over to her and letting her have at it.

"Hey, Stacy. Feel free to just chat away. DRAGON WISHES on the silver screen. Who do you want in it and why?"




The following confession is pretty pathetic, but I actually wrote one of the parts in my book with a particular actor in mind. Reader should now picture author hanging her head like a scolded dog because yes, I wrote Uncle Norbert as a Johnny Depp character. (NOTE: If you’re reading Johnny, please just have your agent get in touch with my agent. I’m sure it will all work out. Uncle Norbert is really written for you.)

Personal fantasies aside, if that ever does happen, believe me, I will so absolutely blog about it.
Still, you may be wondering, why did I do this? Massive star crush perhaps? Only slightly. The bigger reason is because Uncle Norbert is someone eccentric, off the wall, and odd. I kept thinking of some of the amazingly bizarre characters Johnny Depp has played – and there have been a few. I pictured Mr. Depp with rumpled hair, his shirt half untucked, meandering around the house with an old book in one hand, a spongy pastry covered in powdered sugar in the other, and this surprised look in his eyes. He was the big guest star appearance in my book.

As for the others, well, it would be an unusual cast.

First off, the most real and important. Last year while I was doing a school visit I met a student who is the real live Maddie, Alex’s best friend. She goes to a school in a Chicago suburb and is named, no kidding, Maddie. I met her well after the book was finished, but she was, in almost every way, the living version of my character – cheerful, mile a minute chatterbox. If you’re reading, Maddie – which is so much more likely than Johnny Depp – you’d just have to play yourself in my movie, okay? You’re the all time perfect best friend.


The next one I would cast is Mrs. Chen. I’d ask, beg, badger – and pretty much pester nonstop – Amy Tan to play Mrs. Chen. I know she’s not an actress per se, but since I get to do the casting, I’m promoting her to screenstar extraodinaire. She writes such strong female characters, I think she could pull off Mrs. Chen, no problems.

Auntie Ling would have to be played by my best friend, Ching Ling Teng, who guided me through the Chinese world with such aplomb. I know she’s not an actor – she’s a physicist actually – but she is Auntie Ling. That has to count for something.
Mr. Cisneros, the school principal, would have to be played by the illustrator of my picture books, Shawn Sisneros. He’s a starving artist too, but with so much talent. I think he could totally handle the acting thing. Plus, I borrowed his name. There have got to be some sort of royalties on something like that to get him a screenpart.


Mr. Sanchez, the bus driver who rushes Isa to the hospital, would be played by Cheech Marin. I think I had Cheech’s face half the time while I was writing Mr. Sanchez’s character, somebody with a little attitude but a huge heart willing to go above and beyond to help.

My hairdresser has already claimed the part of the art instructor, Degas Rivera. I had no choice, since I’d like for my hair to continue to look halfway decent, but to promise him the part.

Although my book has no official narrator, someone has to read the dragon story. I’d like it to be Mark Twain. Yes, I realize he is no longer among the living, but there’s no other person I know with a better voice.


As for Alex, Isa, and Shin Wa, and the entire soccer team, I would like to have an open casting day for the kids at all of the schools I’ve visited as an author. I’ve met some real personalities along the way, as well as a few drama queens. I think we could have those parts filled in no time flat.

And that's a wrap. Although we're sure Stacy will have cameo roles for all her 2k8 classmates!

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2k8: We're back with Stacy A. Nyikos, debut author of the middle grade fantasy DRAGON WISHES. And because we're classmates, we get to ask her pretty much whatever we want. So, here goes.

Stacy, where do you do most of your writing?


Stacy: I do most of my writing in my office. I’ve tried sitting in a comfy chair facing the window, but that was sort of counterproductive, although I was really well rested! Much as I liked that great view, I realized that I’m pretty much a desk person. I guess I need a little bit of discomfort to keep my mind focused. I’m in good company, though. Hemingway wrote standing up. He said that helped him pare down and only write what absolutely needed to be said. I’m glad I don’t have to go to such extremes, but the desk definitely helps me slip into my own imagination and unlock the stories waiting in there to be told.

2k8: What made you begin writing DRAGON WISHES?

Stacy: DRAGON WISHES came to be through a number of factors. The first, and most monumental, was an event. About five years ago, my daughters were in a near fatal sledding accident. When they crashed into the back of a parked horse trailer, my world came to a crashing halt. I stopped writing. I became depressed. My personal life fell apart. Ironically, it was pen and paper that got me through the darkness. The emotions my daughters’ accident left me with had taken on a life of their own. It wasn’t all that productive. I needed to redirect. Turn them into something good, rather than destructive. The heart of Dragon Wishes was born – how do children work through the grief and sadness of loss. Heavy stuff, I know, but that’s where it all started.

2k8: And how did DRAGON WISHES find a publisher? Give us the *real* dirt!


Stacy: I submitted, and submitted, and submitted. I wish I could say there was some real dirt, but it was mostly pure, unadulterated rejection – like high school all over again. Then one day, as I contemplated the ratio of time it would take to burn my manuscript as opposed to the time it took to write it, I got an email from a friend about a regional publisher that was–dare I say it–looking for new works to build its line. It was Blooming Tree Press. I submitted to them. Instead of a rejection letter, I got a call from Miriam Hees shortly before Christmas. Well, okay, it was December 8, and I was actually frantically grocery shopping at Whole Foods (not that I remember exactly what I was doing). Through the clatter of carts, crinkle of plastic and roar of my heart, I heard those words I’d been waiting to hear for soooooooo long – the book had been accepted. It was the best present ever.


2k8: Imagine you have an offer from your dream press to publish your dream book, no matter how insane or unmarketable it might be (though of course it might *not* be). What's the story?


I’m pretty sure I jumped off the deep end a long time ago when I decided to write for a living. I’m a starving artist! I’ve pretty much given in to the insanity of my profession and write whatever I feel most strongly about. I have to have a strong reaction to stay with the labor of creating the story and then the marathon of revisions. So, I’m writing my dream book right now, Pelorus Jack, which is set in late 19th century New Zealand, and is about a boy and a dolphin who become inseparable friends.


What question won't most people know to ask you? What is your answer?

It’s one I’ve heard a few brave–and very wise–children ask. How much do you make? The answer is really easy – less than their teachers. I’d really really really like to make more money at it, don’t get me wrong. If there is an agent out there who can make it happen, please give me a call! But in the end, I write because I am passionate about storytelling. I have the great and elusive gift of being in love with what I do. Without that, I’d go back to my day job tomorrow.


For today, we leave you with a gorgy photo of a two-year-old Stacy. Who knew this cutie patootie would grow up to be a passionate writer!


Click back tomorrow for more on Stacy A. Nyikos and her fantasy middle-grade, DRAGON WISHES!

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It's another super exciting week on the blog. We're celebrating the launch of classmate Stacy A. Nyikos' debut middle-grade novel DRAGON WISHES.


Ahhhh....What can we tell you about Stacy?

She has always been a storyteller. When she was little, her parents called her a ham. Why? Because she acted out her stories!

Then she learned to write. And we're happy she did.

Besides writing, Stacy loves to travel. In DRAGON WISHES, she flies her readers high above the earth and into the mythical world of Chinese dragons.

Stacy also has three children's picture books under her belt: SQUIRT (2005), SHELBY (2007), and DIZZY (2007).

When she isn’t traveling–either through her imagination or around the globe–Stacy lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma, with her husband and two daughters.

Guess what else? Stacy has a Ph.D. in Political Science from the University of Virginia. She's one smart cookie.

Okay, Stacy, tell us about DRAGON WISHES and how it came to be.

Eleven-year-old Alex is searching. So is Shin Wa. They both need to find a path out of the darkness that surrounds them. Shin Wa’s journey leads her to the Black mountains of the far north in China. There she discovers more than just the last surviving dragons. She finds a way to save mankind. It all lies in a single pearl of wisdom. The gem is also the key to Alex’s own journey. The pearl travels through the ages to find the struggling young girl and her sister. But it is not until Alex discovers how to use the pearl that she finds a path out of the darkness.

Here's the story behind the story. I wanted to build a strong sense of family into my book. The Asian culture offered that to me. Now, I have to say, I am neither Asian nor did I grow up in an Asian household. I did grow up in a family very proud of its heritage. I am a third generation Hungarian. However, when I moved back to the United States from Germany to start my PhD, my best friend was Ching Ling Teng, from Taiwan. We celebrated holidays together, both Western and Eastern. We cooked ethnic foods. We told stories. She and her extended family took me in and made me feel at home again in the U.S., odd as that may sound.

When I began working on DRAGON WISHES, Ling and I had long conversations about names and what they mean, festivals and their importance, Chinese storytelling, and stories from her childhood. Many of them found a place in my story.

But dragons? I knew next to nothing about Chinese dragons. I began researching. I read books. I combed the Internet. I learned a lot. But I still wasn’t quite ready to write. Then one day, I learned that Asian dragons protect knowledge. And that knowledge is symbolized in a very unusual way, by a pearl.

Many Chinese dragons, both drawn and as statues, have a small pearl around their neck. They are said to guard this pearl of wisdom. For me, it became the key to my story. It became the element that could crossover from the legend into the real world and spur Alex into action. Thanks to the pearl, Alex began to change her life. Granted, she didn’t get it right at first. Does anybody? But she had guidance, a family that loved her, and, finally, the will to move in the right direction.

The pearl of wisdom became more than just magical, or symbolic of knowledge–or even the dragon story–in Dragon Wishes. It became a representation of storytelling in our lives. As such, it led Alex to three things: family, wisdom, and love. I had my story.

Very cool, Stacy. We love hearing the story behind the story.

Join us tomorrow for the inside scoop on how Stacy landed her publishing contract with Blooming Tree Press. We're looking forward to a week learning about Stacy A. Nyikos and her fantasy middle-grade DRAGON WISHES!

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