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I never read this book, but the synpopsis makes me want to. I really like this. I'm glad I'm not an editor, because I think this one is just darling.

I've always hated this book, even as a child. Something about an evil adult exacting revenge on an orphaned child turns my stomach. Go figure.But, shouldn't the synopsis mention Miss-Minchin-the-bitch's motivation for hating Sara? Or maybe I don't remember correctly, WAS there motivation for her to hate Sara in the book? Lots of kids are good, was that the only reason? (seems implausible without

The story sounds way too familiar to me... I'm sure I've seen a movie with a very similiar premise. But that being said, I do think it's a good idea, but somethings don't add up for me. First, like others have said, why does Miss Minchin hate her, and secondly, it's hate to believe that her father died leaving her penniless but the father's old business partner is rich and looking for her.

Um Anon? The contest was for Well-known children's books...And yes, the Shirley Temple version was similiar, but not identical. =)(also, if I recall, the schoolmistresses motivation was that she'd bought a lot of stuff for Sara expecting to be paid back, and was now left footing the bill...)

Anon 9:59 - I agree, the synopsis needs to show *why* the mistress would be "enraged" at the child.Anon 10:24 - (1) It's a famous Shirley Temple movie. (2) The setting has a "Dickens" feel, so the fact that the women might not know the partner existed, or how to get in touch with him, is not atypical for the milieu. (3) Partnership agreements, even today, can provide for all interests to be

I'm Anon 10:24. Sorry I misunderstood the point... sorry again.

Miss Minchin disliked Sara because she did not respond to her rather obvious cold-fishy flattery when they first met, and then Sara unintentionally made her look stupid in front of all the students and the French tutor.It was thought the diamond mines Capt. Crewe and his partner invested in were a bust--and the partner ran away in shame at having ruined his best friend...but then it was

I just wanted to say thank you thank you thank you. I've made improvements on my synopsis thanks to your postings here. I think I'm finally starting to get it. I was a fan of your blog already. Now I'm indebted.

I love Princess Sara or Sarah Crewe! I even love the Toei Animation Studio's version of the novel! It's the classic!I was surprised to know some commentators didn't understand the book when I as a foreign kid who first read it, fully understood the story and ran off in the "World of Imagination." *smiles like Spongebob*

Thanks for sharing this with us!!

I'm just glad that's not MINE. ha.

I agree the story is really involved. I think the problem with the sypnosis is that you're trying to tell every little plot (including major and minor plots) of the story. I would just focus on the 'main' plot points.

EA: thanks for doing this. I'm learning about writing synopses as well as finding out about books that I haven't heard before, like this one.

Considering that I tossed this off in ten minutes because there weren't enough submissions, AND I stuck to the 150-word limit, I'm going to take that maybe as a compliment.

Absolutely. For ten minutes, it's quite good. :)

Congrats on taking on such an involved plot in 150 words. My hat's off to you, mb.And thanks, EA. This has been a helpful exercise!

One of my favorite books.The first paragraph is excellent, but the rest is a mish-mash of plot points. I'm not feeling anything for the character. Brian is a compelling character, to me. There's even humor in there, with the fool birds and the those sour cherries....And, btw, this is why I think it's really hard to write a synopsis. At least in a query you can get creative and capture the voice.

This is the super hard thing about synopsi in general, I find. In a query, which is so short, you can toss up the main elements and they can all come off sounding fresh and give you an urge to read. But this synopsis, along with ALL the rest don't give me any reason to read, they all sound bland, and I don't think it's the nature of the writer -- but of a synopsis itself. Anytime you've got to

This made me laugh:Alone in the wilderness, check. Surviving on your own, check. A failed rescue attempt, check. Emerging as a more mature person, well, duh.Thanks. ;o)

I loved Hatchet :)

This wasn't mine, but I can easily see where I faulter as I try to decide what to include in a synopsis.EA's innocent question is: "What bargain that helps neither?"But there are fifty other similar questions that could be picked out by other editors. "Why does the witch cast this spell on Sophie?" "Why does Calcifer eat girl's hearts?" "A sister? She has a sister, shouldn't we know this in the

Thanks EA! I really struggled with this one....I think it might actually be HARDER to write a synopsis for a well-loved book than for one that makes you feel "meh."Because if you love a book you have the urge to cram in everything that makes it special and then finish with "Look, trust me! It's brilliant! You'll love it! Take two, so you have one to lend out!!!"I haven't tried to write a synopsis

Now I have a better understanding of the film/animated version, although there wasn't a sister in that movie that I remember.

It's Keladry of Mindelan.

I kind of remember this novel as being a LOT more dull than your typical Tamora Pierce... (Never even finished this series... these books and her circle of magic books just didn't do it for me... But she redeemed herself in my eyes with the "Trickster" books!

Thanks for reminding me why I don't read fantasy. It has nothing to do with the qualtity of synopsis, but anytime I have to learn/remember three weird, unpronouncable (at first sight) names, I lose interest. Yamani Ambassador, Kethry of Mindelan, native Tortall all combined with training for knighthood. Gee, I've got a headache.I imagine writing synopsi for fantasy is harder than for contemporary

Oh, I have to plug Tamora Pierce's "The Circle Opens" quartet. Four fantasy police procedurals, set in different magical societies. I especially recommend "Cold Fire" to writers, as an awesome example of how to introduce LOTS of characters while keeping the reader oriented to who they all are. I break that out every year or so to study the technique.Anon 9:36 - You're right, the "daughter of

No, the book did not end this anticlimactically. Her maid, whose name escapes me at the moment, is kidnapped in an attempt to keep Keladry from the trials which she must attend and complete in order to continue on with the last three page years, and her four years as squire before becoming a knight. Her main antagonist, the master-at-arms or something like that who is in charge of the

First Test is only the first year of her training. The maid doesn't even appear until the second book. The second book encompasses three years of her page training and then the maid is kidnapped and Keladry risks redoing the entire four years in order to save her.

So EA, since the ending is more about the training master's change of heart, would you write the synopsis concentrating on his actions towards her and then show why the change to letting her stay is more interesting than it seems? The book seems to have two main threads - the one between her and the training master and the one between her and the other page trainees. She wins over the master and

First, yes her name is Keladry.Second. I'm not a writer of any sort, but I have to jump in because you seem to be missing the essence of the story. There are two main themes. One, Keladry is fighting against the common predjudice toward girls in Tortall. She is showing, with perseverence and a lot of hard work, that she can do what boys do. In some cases, she can do it better. Two, (and

I woke up this morning thinking about themes. While the theme of the series is that she is Protector of the Small, it's not mentioned in this book. You see the start of it here. You see the start of a lot here. Made me really think about what is the theme of just this book.What I came up with was acceptance. She is fighting literally and figuratively for acceptance into the ranks of the

I finished reading the Kel series just the day before yesterday, so the book is fresh in my mind. I think Sarah's synopsis captures it very well. But -- I think the ending of the FIRST TEST really was anticlimactic. Even if you don't know the titles of the sequels (PAGE, SQUIRE, and LADY KNIGHT), it's not a book that leaves real doubt about whether the protagonist will achieve her goal. Mostly,

Tamora once said that she broke her writing up into four books because she thought that kids wouldn't read a longer version. After JKR and the explosion of the length limit myth, she wrote Trickster as two books.I imagine that by the time of Keladry, she was selling the whole series. Even though First Test is more of a setup book, this particular series is my favorite.

As I understand it Tammy was told very firmly by her editors that "children - even young adults - would not read thick books", so she had to split her first few ideas into sets of four. Then Harry Potter came along and she rather pointedly said, "Well then, what about letting me have a go?" and thus was able to get a contract for Trickster's Choice and Trickster's Queen.I don't think there are

This certainly reads great, but I'm confused as to what elements EA is expecting to be mentioned. Are there rules?*Her "competitor and friend" are not named and no other details about him are given. *Isn't naming main characters something you should do? If you have to do it in a query, shouldn't you have to not only do it in a synopsis but also expand on that character, so the editor gets a sense

It seems the excellent ones are the ones that went over on word count. Interesting.

Oops. My bad. I counted your comment EA.

I just watched Casino Royale last night, and couldn't stop wondering why they didn't just put in one of those cameras like the poker shows have. I mean, they have instant poison alerts, but not the technology of ESPN?

As a fairly new Snarkling, I had not realized that the Happy Hooker Crapometer did anything but first pages or queries. For those young lambies who were as clueless as I, I had to google to find the archives of the synopses: http://misssnark.blogspot.com/2005_12_25_archive.html

How long should a synopsis be? One page, one page per 10K? It's very confusing.

Thanks for this post. I met an editor who requested a one page synopsis, and it's putting me to sleep. By the time I eliminate any sub-plot threads and secondary character arcs, it looks like everything that happens is either too much of a coincidence or contrived. I know you can't go into details in a short synopsis, but this one-pager (thank goodness it's ok to single space) is driving me nuts, especially since it's romantic suspense, and the "rules" require full story development for both hero and heroine along with all the GMC stuff for each. It's like writing 2 separate books to begin with. The synopsis guides I've seen also list the 'must show' moments for the relationship side. By the time you cover h/h first meet, first kiss, first sex, falling in love moment, black moment & resolution, there's hardly room for the mystery/suspense plot. At least I can go back and try to kick up the word selection.

And on the other side, an agent requested a chapter by chapter summary. I keep telling myself I should be writing those as I complete each chapter in the writing process, but I never listen.

How in the hell could you watch too much of Casino Royale?

You will never NOT have to do synopses.
I have had to do more since my book sold than I did before.
I am REALLY sorry to have to tell you all this.

Word ver:
hmaope

A cross between a Hummer and an antelope

Too much Casino Royale?
Too much Daniel Craig?
Will I have to go to a support group for this?
cmr

I think I must have about five different ones for each piece I write...even in the short story market editors requests will vary. Some want one page, others one-two...and then there are those who want five and so on. There are also those who want a chapter by chapter synopsis (which is a good tool, though torture)In this case it really is about following the guidelines...they are usually very clear.

Wasn't Pussy Galore in Goldfinger, not Casino Royale?

I just saw Honor Blackman in a Bond Girls segment and she still looks damn good.
Joe

Pussy Galore was not the only Ian Fleming heroine. There were Kissy Suzuki and Miss Goodhead also.

I think Fleming was trying to say something with these names, but for the life of me I cannot make out what it was.

Huh? What the heck is a futuristic prologue? This sounds like something from science fiction, but you never know. . .

I think that was a question from another planet.

You should usually avoid prologues in a novel, so why include them in a synopsis?