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2 AM awake
Awake, asleep, and awake
Foghorn on the Bay

There’s no sky today in San Francisco, just fog. Outside, buses and dogs and flowers are memory-distant.

I’ve never heard the Bay foghorn from my bed. I happened to wake at the right time.

My dad was raised on Lake Michigan, in a town of car-ferries and shipping. He is a connoisseur of foghorns, from the old BE-OH to the new less macho (but further-carrying) OOOOP. I woke up happy. His sounds of home have become my sounds of home.

here's Connor and his new book.

Sensibly he is trying to eat it because it looks so terribly delicious. What a very good idea.

Or is he perhaps imitating Clasp's famous, scarifying line from the book: "I'm going to eat you... with my mouth!"

Find out more by visiting his mom's blog. She is giving away a signed copy of Handbag Friends.

p.s to previous post: another very important thing about Jessica, of course, is her pink blanket.
she is DEFINITELY very completely related to another certain Hippo of my acquaintance. (Seen above with pink blanket, and the Handbag Friends.)

How many Hippos you know have a pink blanket?
Or a good friend who is a dog?
Or can sing?
(Which I'm sure she can)

Speaking of singing, shouldn't we?
I do think it's time, don't you?
Really. Wouldn't it be rather rude not to?
For Jessica's sake?

Sing along now!

LATEST HANDBAG SCOOP: following yesterday's "Scary Handbags" segment, a handbag expert has written in telling me,

"That triangle thing is named 'Elvira'. I threw her away in 1960. How did she end up on your blog?"

I don't know exactly. It's a very good question. Turning up like this 47 years later.

Except that nasty bad handbags do have a way of turning up when you least expect them. Take Clasp for instance. But that's another story (well, it's The Handbag Friends' story, to be exact).

Regardless, that big show off bag has a name and it is ELVIRA.

Of course it is.

What else could it be?

(I happen to know for a fact she is best friends with Clasp--seen below in full swing scaring one of the poor Handbag Friends.)


Quick, all this talk of nasty handbags, we better sing the Handbag song again. Just in case.

I've come across some frightening handbags in my time. But have you ever? Just look at them. Sitting there like that. They have to be some of the worst handbags I've ever seen. Quite awful. So awful, in fact, that I wouldn't be at all surprised if it turns out they're Friends and Relations of Clasp herself. (If you don't know who Clasp is, never fear, you soon will.)

I don't know their names (if you do, please let me know). But I do know one thing: they are up to no good looking like this. (Particularly that "tri-cornered" one at the bottom. What a horrible show off she is.) And I know one thing else: I wouldn't want any of these dangling off my arm--would you?


This concludes Part 1 in our Handbag Series. In Part Two we will be meeting some more unsavory bags. But no posting about handbags is complete without a recital of the famous, the notorious, the completely addictive... the song everyone is singing... the song that belongs to The Handbag Friends--and to... YOU!

Get ready (really, it's the only sensible thing to do when faced with such dreadful handbags) ... sing!

THIS JUST IN FROM OUR INTREPID CORRESPONDENT IN LONDON, SAM THE TIGER (caught below--unusually without Tiger Disguise):

Moo Moo and Ya Ya have been spotted over the Atlantic Ocean and are believed to be winging their way to New York City even as we speak. They are wearing their famous Helicopter Hats (as seen above in S-T-T's brilliant rendering). What they plan to do when they arrive is anyone's guess. But you may be sure, whatever it is, it's very naughty indeed.

But we can sleepy easily knowing that S-T-T will be the first to report it whatever it. Stay tuned. And thanks S-T-T for this tremendous scoop!

isn't it time?

yes, of course it is

(it's always time
because you just never know when
a not altogether friendly
very large
purple
handbag might be in the vicinity
lurking)

QUICK! Let's help those poor Handbag Friends and do what Harry says and sing! (dancing's allowed, too--but not so much running away and screaming).

Here's Niss (with Ellie underneath).

Niss of course is a blanket and his name came about, quite simply, because of Ellie pointing at him and saying, "I want niss" (this) when she was too little to be able to use her mouth for N words quite properly yet.

Ellie's Niss was the inspiration behind Binky's Blanket in Handbag Friends. In fact, Ellie was the inspiration behind a great deal of Handbag Friends. She invented the brilliant word: "misappeared", for instance. She is also "The Beautiful Princess Eleanor" (but you don't need me to tell you that. It's plain to see--she's so completely umdidlyscrumptiously oodlingforthingfull princesstral in every way.)

She's also the inspiration for the Big Sister in How To Be A Baby: by Me, The Big Sister. Best of all, she's my niece and I get to be her aunt.

You could say she's a bit of a muse for me. But then you could say that about every one of my nieces and nephews. And actually pretty much every child I meet.

NEWEST NEWS JUST IN: Semolina and this blog have just been tagged by The Ginger Cats (aka The Ginger Darlings) on their True Confessions Meme. (We had to check and find out what exactly a "meme" is. It's kind of a virtual "tag you're it" all around a theme, as far as we can tell. And clearly it's our turn... so now we know, here we go.)

(Semolina is of course the clever ginger cat seen in this picture of The Handbag Friends.)

We're supposed to give away deep dark cat secrets is the idea but of course Semolina is a cat far too clever for such things. However, she will say this. As anyone who knows her will tell you, Semolina loves to say the word "ACTUALLY" rather loudly, quite without warning and very much all the time. Because first of all, it sounds nice to say; second of all, it feels nice to say; and third of all, she doesn't have a third of all.

In case you don't believe her, try it and ACTUALLY you'll soon see what she means. And ACTUALLY now Semolina is going to ACTUALLY tag: Jago. (We aren't sure if he ACTUALLY has a cat, but we know he ACTUALLY can draw one!)

Blue bells are all very well but what must it be like to have them come up to your head?

Remember what that felt like? To be in a world where you weren't much bigger than blue bells? Everything so electric and startling and strange. I have one particularly vivid memory of walking through a busy departement store with my mother when I was about 5 and all the ladies' handbags coming up and hitting me on my head.

It's a wonder I am not in mortal terror of handbags. Thankfully I'm not. And only completely adore them instead.

(Just as well. Otherwise, where on earth would Handbag Friends be?)

(this photo, by the way, is of little Lily Peach, daughter of Jago, my friend and fab illustrator of The Jesus Storybook Bible.)

THIS JUST IN from our intrepid correspondent in London, Alice. On the fly Alice sketched this brilliant and very life-like portrait of Semolina. Thank you, Alice.

According to our intellegence, we believe Semolina was on a secret mission at the time. It is unconfirmed. None of the Handbag Friends were available for comment (probably because of the great secrecy and extreme sensitivity of their mission). And the only thing Clasp said was too rude to print here, I'm afraid.

Nevetheless, we are happy to know The Handbag Friends are still going on exciting adventures together. Missed their first adventure? Quick, find out more: Click here!

And before you go, why not join in their famous song and do a little dance? What could be the harm? Click here!