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This illustration by Denise Clemmensen seemed to be a good fit with my advice on Editor Etiquette. Denise was featured on Illustrator Saturday. Click here to view.

Thought I would bring up the subject of editor etiquette, since many of you are new to the Children’s Publishing Industry and may not be familiar with the standards of contacting an editor. I bring this up, because an editor who was nice enough to donate her time to critiquing the first pages contacted me to let me know that she was receiving a lot of phone calls to ask if they could send in a manuscript, even thought they were attending the NJSCBWI June Conference.

Editors are extremely busy and calling them on the phone to ask if they would be interested in reading your manuscript is not advised. I am sure they understand how important your manuscript is to you, but their job and time is important to them. As a writer, we need to respect the editors time.

First impressions are important, so we want to put our best foot forward and not be remembered for someone who interrupted and important project. That is why attending events that allow you to interact with an editor are a good thing to do. The better thing to do would be spending your time getting an agent who editors expect to hear from.

I am not talking about never calling an editor who you have built a relationship with, but always remember they are at work and any call to anyone is a disturbance when someone is working, so in most cases email is a better choice.

CONGRATULATIONS:

Anita Nolan just signed a contract with agent Erzsi Deak at Hen & Ink for representation.

Carol McAllister won Honorable Mention! for Floating Piñatas, another story in her collection for young readers that has placed in the International Writers and Editors competition. This makes four of the six stories winners, thus far. They all center on trickster monkeys here in Puerto Rico.

Ann Rinaldi’s novel “A Break With Charity” was selected by “First Book Manhattan” as a recommended book for Childrens’ Book Week 2014.

Shannon Wiersbitzky‘s WHAT FLOWERS REMEMBER is now available in paperback. Published by namelos.

Talk tomorrow,

Kathy

This illustration was sent in by Heather Dent. Since a little girl, Heather’s dream has been to become a professional author and illustrator. Now the time has come to try to make that dream come true.  Right now she works for a small business in Berea KY called Attic Light Studios that transfers old videos and photos into digital files and makes movies for special events like weddings, funerals, and anniversaries.  Her blog is:  http://heatherdentstudio.blogspot.com/.

Anita Nolan is doing a four hour intensive workshop titled, Creating Better Beginnings on June 7th at the New Jersey SCBWI Conference. Here is the description:

It’s vital to make the first pages of your manuscript the best they can be. After all, an editor or agent might read no more than the first few paragraphs before deciding to reject. In this intensive we’ll look at different ways to begin a story and what should be included in the first few pages. We’ll consider what you are revealing about your main character, (and whether it is what you intended!) and whether the character is sympathetic. You’ll rewrite your first paragraphs of your story in this workshop. Bring a printed copy of your first chapter (at least 5 pages, double spaced), paper and pen, (and your laptop if you’d like—laptop is not necessary) highlighter, and be prepared to dig into your first chapter.

I asked Anita if she could share some tips with the writers following my blog. Anita does a great job. You will learn a lot and advance your story if you sign up for her Friday session. Below are a few things from Anita on what a first chapter should accomplish:

As a reader dives into the first chapter, he searches for clues as to what type of story he’s reading. Is it a fantasy? Historical? A fast-paced adventure or a slower-paced coming of age story? Is the voice humorous? Sarcastic? Flowery?

A story’s beginning makes a promise to the reader about what type of story he’s picked up, the pacing, and voice.

Recently I read first pages from one story that promised a fantasy but had no fantastical elements, and from another that had no fantastic elements in the beginning, but the story had an entire secondary fantasy world.

Here are a few things the first chapter should accomplish:

1. Intrigue Reader. Hook them & keep them reading.

2. Introduce either main character/s or theme.

3. Identify what Main character needs/lacks/wants.

4. Identify the obstacles standing in the Main Character’s way.

5. Establish a bond (sympathy) between the reader & Main Character.

6. Present the world in which the story is set.

7. Establish the general tone of the novel.

8. Show Pacing.

9. Show the Voice.

Remember registration ends April 30th at midnight.

Talk tomorrow,

Kathy

Author Anita Nolan will be conducting two workshops at the Pearl S. Buck Writing Center in 2013.

Here are the details:

WRITE A NOVEL IN A YEAR CLASS ~ Must PRE-Register by January 9

LOCATION:  520 Dublin Road Perkasie, PA

Fee: $120

Email [email protected]

TELEPHONE: 215-794-2562 or 267-421-6203

Registration Click Here:  Due by Jan 9.

This is a six-session year-long class, with an additional two “write-ins” (where you have two hours of quiet at the Pearl Buck Writing Center to work on your story, get questions answered, or just meet with other writers.)

DATES: 1/26, 2/23, 4/27, 6/22, 7/27, 9/28, 10/26, 11/23 - 4^thWk.

TIME: Saturday Mornings 9:30 – 11:30

This series of workshops is for those struggling with starting–or completing– a novel. It’s appropriate for those writing Middle Grade, Young Adult, or Adult novels.

We’ll cover characterization, plotting, where to start your story and creating a strong story beginning, how to deal with a sagging middle, proper formatting, showing–not telling, adding tension, and many other topics, with plenty of time for questions.

Author and Editor Anita Nolan will lead a year-long writing workshop taking participants through the complete novel-writing process.  Those signing up for the entire workshop series will meet for 8 teaching/writing sessions & will include email write-ins & a Yahoo Writing Group. The workshop is for adult writers interested in working on juvenile, young adult, or adult novels.  www.anitanolan.com   www.anitanolan.wordpress.com

Includes an Authors Tour of the Pearl S. Buck National Historic Landmark House.

______________________________________________________________________

Jan 12, Feb 9, March 9 ~ NOVEL CRITIQUE & REVISION WORKSHOP

LOCATION:  520 Dublin Road Perkasie, PA

FEE: $90

CONTACT:  [email protected]

Time Zone: America/New_York
Local Time: 9:30 AM – 12:30 PM

(only for those writers who have successfully completed the 2012 Write a Novel in Year Class unless permission is granted by instructor after reviewing a submitted manuscript)

Author and Editor Anita Nolan will lead a three-month workshop taking participants through their novel’s critiquing and revision process prior to publishing. It includes email write-ins & a Yahoo Writing Group. The workshop is for adult writers who have completed the 2012 Novel Writing Class or w/permission and are interested in submitting their completed novel for publishing. www.anitanolan.com  www.anitanolan.wordpress.com

Anita Nolan is the author of  When the Dust Settled, a historical fiction chapter book published by Homecourt Publishing.  You won’t find it in bookstores; it’s sold in packs of 25 with a teacher’s guide for use in classrooms. She was executive editor of Sprouts, the magazine of the New Jersey Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators, has written annotations for Best Books for Children and articles for magazines. Anita is also a frequent speaker about the writing process to writers’ groups. She writes humorous tween contemporaries and middle grade historical fiction.

Click here to register

Talk tomorrow,

Kathy

Here are somethings to look for and ask yourself when doing a critique of your own writing or someone elses.

• Are there opening hooks (for both the start of the manuscript and the beginning of each chapter,) as well as hooks at the end of chapters?

• Is the conflict strong, or is it contrived and something a conversation could resolve?

• Setting? Does it seem real?

• Are the senses involved? (description of smell, touch, taste, etc.)

• Does the story hold your interest? If not, where did you lose interest?

• Accuracy and consistency: Do the facts seem accurate, (no cell phones in the 1700s, for example) and are they consistent (blue eyes don’t turn green somewhere along the way.)

• Were you able to suspend disbelief? (Of course, if it is your own story, you will probably not be the best person to judge this. Here is where a critique group will help.)

• Does the story work? Do you want to read more? (This another place where your critique group can help.)

• With characters, ask yourself: Are the main characters three-dimensional? Sympathetic? Are other characters well drawn? Are motivations strong and clear?

I want to thank Anita Nolan www.anitanolan.com for sending these into share with us. Tomorrow I will share 10 Writing Style Elements to Check that Anita sent, so check back.

Talk tomorrow,

Kathy

While we often think of dialogue as the words that come out of a character’s mouth, written dialogue actually comes in two parts: what’s inside the quotation marks, (the words a character says) and the words outside the quotation marks (who said it and how it was said).

Dialogue Tags are the words outside the quotation marks that accompany the speech within the quotation marks.

In scenes where two characters are speaking—and especially those with more than two characters— dialogue tags are important to help the reader identify who is speaking. However, you have to use tags judiciously to keep from sounding repetitive.

There are two types of dialogue tags:

1. Taglines: typically he said/she said.
2. Action Tags: movements or actions that show the reader what the character is doing or thinking.

TAGLINES are the simplest way to show who is speaking. While some new writers like to use a variety of tags, such as reply, demand, offer, growl, or inquire in an effort to sound original, it’s best to use said most of the time. He said/she said disappear on the page unless they’re overused, acting more like punctuation than a verb. More descriptive taglines tend to draw attention to the mechanics of the writing.

Sometimes writers try to prop up said with an adverb. For instance: “That’s funny,” she said laughingly. Adverbs might be acceptable grammatically, but they make for weak writing. (Mark Twain supposedly said, “If you see an adverb, kill it,” and he wasn’t far wrong.) Rather than adding an adverb to a weak verb, try strengthening the dialogue.

Weak dialogue tags don’t have to include adverbs. She said in surprise, for instance, is a weak tagline, even without the use of an adverb. Better to show the reader that the character is surprised—or astonished, disappointed, or relieved—through the dialogue or his actions than to tell it.

Of course, your character can mutter, ask, or whisper occasionally, although those types of taglines become overused quickly. You can sometimes show how a character says something. For instance, “Watch out!” doesn’t need a tagline (unless the speaker requires identifi cation), since what is being shouted and the exclamation point indicate that the speaker is shouting.

YOU CAN’T HISS A SENTENCE. Some verbs, such as laugh, grimace, or hiss shouldn’t be used as dialogue tags, although writers sometimes do it anyway. Try to laugh, sigh, hiss, giggle, or smile a line of dialogue. It isn’t possible. Instead, if you want your character to laugh or smile while speaking, use those verbs as part of an action tag. For example, instead of saying “That’s hilarious,” he laughed, write “That’s hilarious.” He laughed. Or “That’s hilarious,” he said, laughing. This indicates that the character is laughing after he spoke, rather than while he’s speaking, which is pretty tough to do. When you use He laughed in a separate sentence, it becomes an action tag.

If you are attending the NJSCBWI Conference in Princeton, NJ – June 8th, 9th, and 10th, you can sign up for Anita Nolan’s Intensive and Workshop.  She is also speaking at the NESCBWI this weekend.

Talk tomorrow,

Kathy

All good things come to an end.  When I started as Regional Advisor, I started putting up a Newsletter online for members to read.  After a few years with the help of Leeza Henandez, Anita Nolan and Laurie Wallmark, we turned out a very high-end magazine that was focused on bringing children’s writing, illustrating information to the subscribers. Plus, with the goal of showing off SCBWI writers and illustrators to editors, art directors and agents in the industry.  During the last four or five years, it SPROUTS built quite a reputation in the industry, not only with the writer’s and illustrators, but with many industry professionals.

I am sorry to say that National SCBWI will not allow us to continue the magazine, unless we can offer it for free to everyone.  Since that is not possible, this is the last issue subscribers will receive.  Please do not send in a check for next year.  If you are an illustrator or an author who was working on writing an article for the next issue, you can send them to me and I will post them on this blog.  I know it will not provide you with a nice glossy magazine to sit on your coffee table, but agents, editors, art directors, and artist reps do visit my blog and it does get a lot of traffic.  With 20,000 visitors a month and growing, you will get more notice submitting something here.

Here is a copy of the cover for the last issue:

If you would like to submit an article, please send it to kathy (dot) temean (at) gmail.com and put “Blog Article” in the subject box.

Thank you to Leeza, Anita, Laurie, and all the writers and illustrators who helped make this a wonderful magazine.

Talk tomorrow,

Kathy

12 Comments on The End of SPROUTS MAGAZINE, last added: 11/10/2011