First off a HUGE thank you to Erik Smetana for my kick-ass new banner. Check it out - isn't it fabulous. I jigged a few of my colours around to complement it, and I believe the whole page now has a fresher look.
Second, I want to send HUGE thanks to Leah Clarke for proofreading my Robots Beyond submission. The editor, Lance Adamson, liked the story - that's good, right? Lance, however, also pointed out that the commas in particular needed work. I am now mid revision of the story and sitting surrounded by print outs on commas and transitive/intransitive verbs. God help me, I think my brain is going to explode.
Oh, and I can resubmit the story. Picture someone gnawing on her fingernails.
Am I paranoid about the commas in this post? Yes, yes, yes. Do I think I have improved? Yes, yes, I hope so.
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Blog: The Poisoned Apple (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
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Blog: LadyStar (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: cheap world of warcraft, free world of warcraft, world of warcraft, world of warcraft armor, world of warcraft download, world of warcraft druid, kitty, shaman, world of warcraft add-on, world of warcraft pc, night elf, night elf mohawk, The Tree Shores High School Band Room, Jessica Hoshi, Talitha Hayashi, Ranko Yorozu, Alanna Kawa, Leila Hakumei, Cecilia Daichi, Shannon Ka Yoru, buy world of warcraft, LadyStar Video Alert, Add a tag
“We found it! We found it! Talitha-chan is so smart! This one finally has the kitties!”
“Jessica’s right. This one has a kitty in it.”
“Ha! And a Night-Elf-Mo-Hawk!”
“But you said there was one where some girl warrior turned into a kitty.”

Blog: LadyStar (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: world of warcraft download, world of warcraft druid, world of warcraft pc, The Tree Shores High School Band Room, Jessica Hoshi, Talitha Hayashi, Ranko Yorozu, Alanna Kawa, Leila Hakumei, Cecilia Daichi, Shannon Ka Yoru, buy world of warcraft, cheap world of warcraft, free world of warcraft, world of warcraft, world of warcraft armor, kitty, shaman, world of warcraft add-on, LadyStar Video Alert, Add a tag
“There. It’s from the game with the kitties.”
“But there’s no kitties in it.”
“There’s a dragon! I saw them flying!”
“And uhhh… undead spiders and a dwarf.”
“You laughed at me when I predicted this.”

Blog: LadyStar (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
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“Z-bot to Hana. This is a Gamepowa Video Alert. Transmitting now.”
“Outstanding, Z-bot. Continue search. Acey out.”
“Ooh, is that the one that turns into a kitty?”
“Not sure but he sure likes to zap giants with that lightning, huh?”
“Talitha-chan, let’s go find the one that turns into a kitty.”
“And so the duel of the video alerts begins.”
“Why do I get the feeling this is going to end in mass confusion?”
“Ha! Because everything we do is mass confusion!”

Blog: LadyStar (Login to Add to MyJacketFlap)
JacketFlap tags: The Tree Shores High School Band Room, Jessica Hoshi, Ranko Yorozu, Cecilia Daichi, Gamepowa.com, buy world of warcraft, casual players, cheap world of warcraft, free world of warcraft, play world of warcraft, world of warcraft, world of warcraft add on, world of warcraft armor, world of warcraft download, world of warcraft druid, world of warcrcaft PC, Add a tag
“What have you got for us, Space Girl?”
“Well, you folks did a guest article, so we got right to work and decided to get one of our own. We did a little instructional article on How to Succeed as a Casual Player in World of Warcraft.”
“It’s the best player in the game! In the video Acey-san has she runs through this forest with little leaves falling all around and she gets to turn into a kitty! I want to do that too so my character is gonna be druid! I’ve always wanted to turn into a big kitty and run fast.”
“Ooh! Do they got one that can be a dragon? I want to be a dragon so I can breathe fire everywhere and be super strong!”
“Okay we’re rapidly spinning off into goofy land so we’ll say goodnight from the land of kitties and dragons!”
“Catch you all at the Powa! Hana out.”
I, am just awful, when it comes to commas, because I like to use them, as pauses, in my sentences, which, I think, is probably wrong.
I'm a dunce. I honestly believed that commas were all to do with how you said the sentence out loud, that you placed them where you take a breath. I was wrong. I was beyond wrong. I think I'm getting to grips with them now*.
*Though don't bet on it.
It's not your fault that you thought you had to put a comma where a spoken-aloud pause occurs. That's what elementary school teachers used to tell their students. When I did my student teaching a few years ago, I taught a punctuation unit to my fifth graders, and when we reached commas my mentoring teacher told me NOT to tell the kids about the pause-comma myth!
I am still comma-happy myself, though.
Sounds hopeful on the story! If you need another beta-reader, I'm happy to volunteer.
Thanks, KC. I sent the story off to 'Robots Beyond' a couple of hours ago. Fingers crossed. I'm not really expecting to make it into the anthology, but I do think I've learned a heck of a lot revising the story so it's all good.
That's always an important lesson learned. Commas give nearly everyone trouble. Actually, I find punctuation in general seems to be a mystery to a lot of people, particularly non-writers.
Best of luck with the re-sub, hope it works out. I feel your pain with the comma issue. My past (and often present) abuse of the thing all ties back to elementary school like KC talks about. Arrrgghh.
I am learning to love commas - or rather, I don't hate them quite as much as I did.
My story has been placed on the 'probable' list, but the list is longer than the amount of openings left. I will have no fingernails left by April 4th...
I tend to abuse semi-colons.
Also, I wanted to send something in fro Robots Beyond but I cna't force myself to write anything remotely sc-fi. I try and I try, but nada...
Ooh, at least you don't have to wait months to hear! Just until Friday, and if the answer's no, hey, it's still Friday.
Commas, the bane of writers everywhere.
Commas--the bane of writers everywhere.
Commas: the bane of writers everywhere.
Thanks for your comments, everyone.
KC - I like your attitude.
I’m glad to have read this. :)
As I suspected, I’m not being too perfectionist in my concern about commas. They can be tricky little beasts!