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NOTE TO SELF: GOING IN STYLE?


The first thing that hits your field of vision when surfing on to the Toto/Washlet site, http://www.cleanishappy.com/, is the row of bare buttocks with smileys drawn accross, which slowly evolves into the happy faces of three males and females. A mouse click on the first female on the left informs surfers - and toilet seat aficionados - all about a special washlet. Not just any washlet mind you but one that is neither a bidet or a fancy toilet and in the words of the manufacturer: "a pretty remarkable toilet seat."


Oh? This bares further investigation.


According to Ms Washlet 101, who relates all the information, the device is easily installed, on any toilet and uses pure clean water that uses and a "bunch of nifty technology."


Again, oh? One ponders the usage and definition of 'nifty technology.' Perhaps - just perhaps - it doubles as an entertainment centre or something similar. Then again, 'nifty technology' could also be extended to frying an egg or even a mobile device. Nifty is a tricky word!

Our host, Ms Washlet 101 goes on to relate that the way it works is simplicity personified. First-time users sit down and do what they came to do (quaint but succinct) and reach for the remote.

Oh? A remote?

Next the user selects the area to be washed presumably after the person does what they came to do, and with the push of the button, the washlet does the rest. A small wand located below the seat extends, and a gentle stream of warm water cleans you.

Oh happy days!

Don't you love Poetry 180? The idea of a poem a day for high schoolers, to be read over the announcements, is brilliant.

Billy Collins, former Poet Laureate, is brilliant.

I have both volumes of the poems because I can just about guarantee that if I open either one anywhere, I can find an accessible and spot-on poem. Which is what I did today.

Today's poem goes out to anyone who struggles sometimes to keep up with life, with (school) work, with parenting, with blogging (reading and/or writing), and with all the rest of everything that gets dumped on the plate you're trying desperately to keep balanced. It's for all those times when we wanted to be there, but just couldn't make it.

(the whole poem is here)

DID I MISS ANYTHING?
by Tom Wayman

Nothing. When we realized you weren’t here
we sat with our hands folded on our desks
in silence, for the full two hours

Everything. I gave an exam worth
40 percent of the grade for this term
and assigned some reading due today
on which I’m about to hand out a quiz
worth 50 percent

.
.
.

Nothing. When you are not present
how could something significant occur?

Everything. Contained in this classroom
is a microcosm of human experience
assembled for you to query and examine and ponder
This is not the only place such an opportunity has been
gathered

but it was one place

And you weren’t here