“You’re listened to, you’re cared for, and you’re very important to me — children need to hear that in lots of different ways every day.” — Barbara Coloroso.
NOTE: I originally posted this about five years ago. Felt it was time to bring it back again. Carry on!
In previous blog entries, I praised this book by Barbara Coloroso . . .
. . . a title that has informed, enlightened, and guided my own work as a writer, coach, and father.
She’s awesome, that’s all there is to it.
I came across this short video this morning. In less than 90 seconds, Barbara delivers a message that every teacher and parent needs to hear and remember — so that the children in our world hear those same things from us.
As part of a late summer assignment, I received a terrific letter from Zander in Brooklyn, including his answer to the question, “What will happen to the characters in Bystander after the story?”
Here’s an excerpt from that letter . . .
Thanks so much for answering my questions. I really loved your book! I did a little writing about what I thought might happen to some of the characters in the future. I was wondering if you have ever thought about this? Do you think Griffin will continue to be a bully? What about the other characters? I also have to ask the obvious question — were you a bully or where you bullied in school? If not, why did you want to write this book? I’m really looking forward to your answers.
Zander
What I think will happen to the characters after the story:
I think Griffin will still be the bully, but he will be a lone bully with no clique by his side. About twenty pages before the book ended, Griffin’s gang separated from him; they were fed up with Griffin and his ways and felt bad for the people they hurt and picked on. Griffin may form a new clique, but I think the same thing will happen that happened to the original click, they will get fed up with Griffin’s ways. Eventually, Griffin will probably find out that this whole bully thing isn’t working out for him and turn over a new leaf, but I’m not so sure about that either; it’s not exactly Griffin’s way. The other problem is the relationship between Griffin and Griffin’s father. If the way Griffin’s father acts changes, Griffin will change with him. You see, Griffin mimics his father’s actions, and if those actions change, I have a good feeling that a new Griffin will be born. If they would go into therapy, this could be achieved. But since that didn’t happen in the story, it’s unlikely that it will happen now. Thus having Griffin stay the same.
I also think that Mary and Eric will still hang out a lot, they might be considered boyfriend and girlfriend, but I’m not sure. I also think that Griffin’s original clique will turn into Eric’s clique, or Griffin’s original clique will accept Eric as a member; either way, Mary will no longer be Eric’s only friend. Before I finished the story, I thought to myself that it would not be a “…and they all lived happily ever after” ending, and I was right. If the story continued on, I still think this would be true
It’s National No Name-Calling Week from today (Jan 24) through to the 28th! It’s important for everyone to think about bullying and how it can impact us, but this week also has a focus on lesbian/gay/queer victims or homophobic bullying, which I’m really glad about. Check it out. Teachers, you can download lesson plans, tips, and resources, or buy buttons.
And don’t forget to read some great novels on bullying. One of my faves is Blubber
by Judy Blume, and picture books Edwina, The Dinosaur Who Didn’t Know She Was Extinct by Mo Willems; You’re Mean, Lily Jean! by Frieda Wishinsky, illustrated by Kady MacDonald Denton; Superdog:The Heart of a Hero by Caralyn Buehner; and Guji Guji by Chih-Yuan Chen. I’m sure there’s some others I’m just not thinking of. What are your faves?
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