Here is my main problem with writing... getting someone else (sorry Deanna and Madeline - best friends and children don't count in the book industry) to read my oh so wonderful writing because am not a celebrity or an already famous writer.

So, I am beginning to think that I am a better novelist than query letter writer. I say this, because my query letters do not lead to someone asking to read my manuscripts. So, I am throwing my query letter out for this adult fiction comedy I am attempting to get published. How would you improve it?

Query Letter:

Caution, laughing and wincing will transpire during your reading of my hilarious adult fiction novel 306 pages/ 80,000 words, Dog Breath.
When Tom’s career smelling dog breath ends, he undertakes to find another career and attract the attention of his best friend’s girlfriend, a classy advertising agent who represents the Dog Food Company that just fired him.
Raised in the Mormon foster care system, the instability exposed me to many quirky and different southern and Mormon personalities and led me to the setting of the book, Tallahassee, Florida, where I lived on or around there for ten years. I received a BA in English Education at Florida State University. I taught Seventh English Literature for a year before staying home with my children, though I kept my certification valid as an English Literature Teacher for grades 4- 12. I currently devote my life to writing and staying home with my children, whose funny stories and comments on life have managed to seep into the pages of this novel as well as my blog.
I look forward to you letting me know what you think of this book, whose title and original occupation would intrigue book readers alone.


Jolene Hueber