Ok, so is it totally geeky that I couldn't sleep last night - because I was so excited about going to check out this space?
It's probably going to be a dump and I'll be ultra-disappointed, but ... Well, I can't help it. I'm EXCITED.

Perhaps I should try and relax. I'm pretty good and keeping my poker face. ::DEEP BREATH::

Caren & I are meeting at 10 to go over and check it out (Have I mentioned that I love her lately? I love her).

It's cool. I'm excited. Excited. Excited. Excited. Excited.
I wish I had a big mattress to bounce on... or some bubble wrap to pop.
:)

I'll let you know how it goes... I wonder if I can take pictures... probably not.
People somehow take offense to random strangers casing the joint.

This is for me only -- but I know a few other agents share these pet peeves... so take what you can use and roll your eyes at the rest:

1) A query letter is a business letter. Do not sign your pen name. Do not sign your initials. I hate writing back to Dear A.
2) WHITE SPACE.
3) Do not use words that you've made up for your book in your query letter - they usually have to be explained and neither of us have the time to sit through that in a QUERY.
4) Do not use made up words in the title of your book, unless you can make it COMPLETELY obvious what the title means and how it represents the best marketing efforts that four or less words can -- as the title of your book.
5) WHITE SPACE
6) Include a SASE if I ask for one. Don't if I don't.
7) It takes five minutes to find out how my name is spelled. And to find out that I'm a woman... and that I don't publish books.
8) WHITE SPACE!!!!
9) A quick and dirty way of telling me about your book (especially if it's children's or chick lit) is to tell me the age and location of your character. Not like an AOL chat... Maureen/14/NYC was lookin' for love.... but, "Fourteen year old city-girl, Maureen Hegadorn was checking out the new books on the library rack when Timmy Saunders walked by her and..." Um. Hello. I know where the book takes place (sorta), how old/what type of audience the author is going for, and how large the scope of the book will be.
10) SCOPE OF THE BOOK: who said this? I have no idea -- in some workshop/book there was a quote that the bigger the story --- the smaller the scope it began with, and vice versa. I believe that your query letter should kinda work the same way. If your book is about a very specific issue/person/event - start big and do the upside down pyramid thing...
11) White space... Please.

I've been put on hold... with Delta. They don't love me. Nor do they hate me - they simply feel NOTHING for me.
Hence being put on hold for seventeen minutes. Although Gerri does pop back in now and again to tell me she's so sorry that she has me on hold - right before she pops back off and cackles while she watches my minutes rack up. What if this is a psychological test, and I'm failing?

Ok - I'm off with them now (with no ticket - it was a test).
On Thursday, Caren and I are going through paperwork and ... get this... she's going with me to check out a new place in Brooklyn.
Weeeeeeeeeeeeee! I'm actually quite excited.

Ok, more later, for now... I need to catch up on work.

I'm listening to Dusty Springfield - which is all Caren's fault. ::sigh::

I got an email from an editor the other day asking if I had a certain type of project, which I didn't... but I knew another agent who did. So, I called that agent and told them.

A lot of people don't get this. Don't get "good book karma" - and to be honest, it's not easy. I wish, wish, wish I had the project that the editor wanted. I'm competitive! Of course I wanted to be the one to make a sale, but I'm not so stupid or silly that I would book-block someone else just because it wasn't me making the sale.

One of my clients, Lawrence, once said, "I learned that other people don't have to lose just because I win." And vice versa.

But sometimes I still have to remind myself. It's difficult to watch others succeed while you struggle. I totally get that. I know authors have to do it constantly - watch one of your critique partners (who totally isn't as talented...hehe) get deal after deal while you wait patiently for your turn. It sucks. I know.

So --

If you have ever grinded your teeth while saying "OH MY GOD, THAT'S SO GREAT!!!"
If you ever complained to your significant other about your friend, who you really are 'truly happy for.'
If you ever cried when a friend got something you wanted for yourself...

:::HUG:::

Good for you.

You'll have all your friends rooting for you. Waiting with you for your big moment.
And when it comes... they will all be there, telling you how great you are, how they knew it would always happen and how it couldn't have happened to a better person.

XO

Adam Selzer is CRAZY.

Adam on the plot themes of his next novel (the first one is a spelling bee novel based on the Watergate Scandal): "spell 2 is starting to shape up. Can't base this one on Watergate. It's main sources will be Moby Dick and Rocky 3."

It's 8:30 am, Saturday morning. Simone & I are giving a workshop later this afternoon -- for which there are no (current) hand outs in the hand out booklet? YIKES!?
I think I'll run by Kinko's around lunch time and put a few together. That'll work.

I tried to blog yesterday and it wouldn't let me log in -- so now you're missing all the great stories -- but you know what they say, what happens at Nationals stays at Nationals (no, they don't really say that... but it seemed like a pithy statement).

I was up late last night (and the nights before that... when I usually get to bed at 10 -- so, lemme tell you, I feel hung over and I didn't drink at all....), and watched the authors coming back from the Harlequin party. OH MY. ...I skip the publisher parties, usually, because ...well, it's a party, I'm not much of a party girl... (have you ever tried to be the center of attention amongst a few hundred people? Way too difficult. haha), but I apparently missed a doozy.

DOOZY.

Next year? (probably not)

Anyway. I have meetings soon - so I gotta go get ready, but it's been really, really funny.
Authors are CRAZY.

:)

XO
Dia

Ok, so it's a twelve (not ten) hour drive.
Give or take.

We basically got on the road at 6 pm and arrived at the hotel at noon (yay - just in time for lunch).
We stopped six times for potty-breaks and twice for nap-breaks.
I'm a little tired right now. ((YAWN))

I drove the entire time (Caren lives in NYC and doesnt' have a license...but she swears she could've "taken over at any time." Ahem -- Like I could rest with HER driving? I think not) ---

Caren made mix CDs and we had two that we listened to on the way down: (over and over again) a boy one and a girl one (which had mixes from different female vocals, and male vocals, respectively). Great music. :) Played really, really loudly because I was tired BEFORE we started the trip. :)

...and then, somewhere in Virginia (around 1am) - Caren turns to me and says, "Do you think we should get a map or directions or something?"

Me: Nah. Atlanta is a big city. How can we miss it?

Thankfully, Atlanta IS a big city and it was incredibly hard to miss... although we did have one rough patch where we were driving through fog, saw a small sign that said - take 85 (we were on 95) to Atlanta. So we hop onto 85 and then we don't see another "atlanta" sign until we hit South Carolina.... We did make one (BRIEF) phone call to make sure that we would not have to be passing through Tennessee... ("Is there a state between South Carolina & Georgia? No? Ok!")

We walk into the hotel.
I'm a mess: bleary eyed, glasses, hair is a frizzy mess (we had the windows open the entire ride) and I looked like crap... and I'm standing there, telling the bell hop the room number and Caren goes, "Ha ha, look who is right behind you." (Hint: I talked about him for months on my blog. had a major professional crush... etc...). I didn't even turn around. I just marched for the elevator (leaving the bell hop going, HUH? and Caren laughing).

YAY. The fun begins.
Xo

We officially left.

This is what I did today:

1) Worked in the office until noon.
2) Went out for lunch with Brian - bitched about work, relationships, etc.
3) Picked up Caren from the bus station.
4) Went and PICKED UP MY NEW DOGGY!!! (More on this in a moment)
5) Dropped off my NEW doggy at the kennel (sigh)
6) Cleaned out the car.
7) Went home and packed (Three suitacases and a hand bag - lauren would be proud)
8) Got in the car, went to Panera's (where we are now) -- for dinner (I got soup & salad)
9) We're gonna go to the supermarket & fill up on drive snacks and then head out!!! WHOOO WHO!

10) LONG DRIVE.


Anyway, I have two seconds before Caren yells (She's already standing) --
I got a puppy.
I put an adoption application in --- (Caren is currently talking weird stuff about the fifth season of 24?...and this guy is asking me (over IM) for dirty pictures... what the heck is going on??? I'm in a Paneras! This sort of thing shouldn' thappen in a Paneras!). -- for a 3 year old dog called Annie. Annie is a St. Bernard pup (pup... that's used as an endearment) and I got her! YAY!

So, unfortunately, I had to pick her up before I had to go - so I had to make Extremely fast arrangements with a kennel (and go and check it out quickly) - so the Vet I'm going to use recommended a few, and I picked this one... and brought her there.
She was Soooooooooo good in the car. Sat down nicely on the seat(s) and was absolutely darling. Went potty right before and right after (and not at all in) and was very very charming.

I love her.
I love her.
I love her.
I love her.

Ok. Caren says it's time to go... although she likes the idea of us blogging the entire trip...except now she keeps saying, 'And then they left... and now we're leaving... BLOG THIS. We're leavign!!!!"

:)
Ok, bye guys. More later.

From Lauren's Blog

Introducing....

THE REALITY CHICK BUZZ THE BOOK contest!

The PRIZES:

(1) Your choice of either an iPod Shuffle, OR a fifty dollar Amazon.com gift certificate
(2) An autographed copy of REALITY CHICK by Lauren Barnholdt
(3) A copy of the August issue of Teen People, which lists REALITY CHICK as a Can't-Miss Pick for August
(4) Free tuition to a session of Lauren's YA writing class

THE CONTEST:

STEP ONE: Simply copy and paste this whole message (including the info about the contest) into any blog, message board, email list, myspace bulletin, or anywhere a lot of people will see it!

REALITY CHICK by Lauren Barnholdt is NOW IN STORES!

Going away to college means total independence and freedom. Unless of
course your freshman year is taped and televised for all the world to
watch. On uncensored cable.

Sweet and normal Ally Cavanaugh is one of five freshpeople shacking up
on In the House, a reality show filmed on her college campus. (As if
school isn't panic-inducing enough!) The cameras stalk her like
paparazzi, but they also capture the fun that is new friends, old
crushes, and learning to live on your own.

Sure, the camera adds ten pounds, but with the freshman fifteen a given anyway, who cares?
Ally's got bigger issues -- like how her long-distance bf can watch her
loopy late-night "episode" with a certain housemate...

Freshman year on film.
It's outrageous.
It's juicy.
And like all good reality TV, it's impossible to turn off.

IN STORES NOW!

Check out Lauren on the web at www.laurenbarnholdt.com or on her myspace at www.myspace.com/laurenbarnholdt

STEP TWO -- Email Lauren at lauren (at) laurenbarnholdt.com and let her know you've posted about the contest and the book, and you'll be entered to win the prize pack! The winner will be picked at random on September 1st. The more places you post, the more entries you get. Have fun and good luck!!!

The subject line is from a song that I've had stuck in my head ALL bloody day (it probably doesn't help that I listened to it four times, on CD - so at my own hand - on the way home from jersey today). It's by Fall Out Boy, and there is this great line in there... Anyway, you should listen to it, but warning, it's VERY catchy.

-- Ok, I'm about four minutes from falling apart and falling asleep at my desk.
I straighted up a little bit (i.e. made piles and a list of what piles are what)... I'm a neurotic list writer and have lists of lists... which may Seem like it's going too far, when really -- it's an art.

So, here is my shortened to do list for tomorrow:

Print out a copy of Amanda's Prada & Prejudice (with my notes so I can go over one more time before sending her)
Go to Harrisburg and figure out why they don't love me (driver's license issues... UGH!)
Pick up new business cards from printer
Mail 3 contracts, 2 checks.
Fax a W-9 to Publisher
Call Editor @ S&S (regarding a lot of different things.... )
Call Schools for Jeremy for fall (if it's not too late already! Eek)
Call Editor @ Flux (Hi Andrew)
Call Clients: Jenny, Phoebe, Suzanne, Julie

Ok. I'm falling asleep.
:) OX
Gnight!!!!

(BTW - thanks for all the hugs and well-wishing... I really, really appreciate. I know y'all don't have to do such things -- but going out of your way to be kind -- well, it really made my day way, way better. Thank you!!!!)

So.

I just got home from the movies - I went with my brother.
We went to see Lady in the Water (or is it, Of the Water?) -- and here is what my brother had to say about it:

1) ...do you think they ran out of money when producing the last four minutes?
and
2) ...well, the previews were exciting!

...We actually both kinda liked it. I saw Pirates last weekend (the movie, not the people) and I felt that I got pretty much what I expected. Earlier the previous week I had heard "NINJA ON FILM" who, in his narly accent (which I can't do - It comes out a cross between a Scottish accent and a Jamaican accent, instead of the surfer accent it is supposed to be), said, "You want a plot line? In this movie - Everyone has a plot line!"

So yeah. Lady - pretty good. Pirates - eh. Devil Wears Prada - if you liked the book (I did), you'll like the movie.

----

This morning Rubin (my DH) and I had our final "we're getting divorced" conversation. And it sucked.
I mean, it sucked in a way that Pirates sucked. Like, you knew it was going to be bad --- and in the end, you wondered why you bothered to spend the $8 bucks (and the popcorn was stale).

I left for my parents house around 6pm, where I'm licking my emotional wounds (read going to bad movies with my brother, while he illustrates just how old i really am - by pointing out that I was the oldest person in the movie theater. He's an ass).

So. Things are now finalized between the two of us and paperwork begins on Monday.
I don't want to even think about paperwork.

I'm more bummed than I thought I would be. But, now that it's 'final' --- I kinda feel a little ...settled, I guess.
I feel SO VERY white trash for being this young, with this many kids and now divorced too.
All I need is a pair of pink hot pants, a bee hive and a cigarette holder. And a boyfriend, named AL, with a beer gut. (Any Takers?)

...Now that's a hot image if I ever thought of one...
-----


-------

Ok, back to Nationals...

I'm excited to be going. Simone & I are doing a workshop on writing for teens.

Which led me to the following thoughts (while I mentally prepare)

The difference between GOOD projects and GREAT projects.

Good projects have stereotypical characters.
Great projects have recognizable characters.

Good projects have complex plots.
Great projects have complex conflicts.

Good projects have "a hook."
Great projects have "a meaning."

Good projects rely on hot topics.
Great projects don't rely on anything.

----

Maybe I'll talk more about this - but I like where I was going... until I started listening to the radio (I was thinking of this in the car... so if there is a good song on, I lose my train of thought).


... Ok, I'll post from the road and let you know how Nationals are going.
This, obviously, will be my first National conference as a Firebrander. I'm QUITE excited.

((joy))

OX
Dia

If you ever hear me mutter about "15% not being enough" -- these are two prime examples of why I feel that way.

----------
Lauren on housework.

Nadia: I totally lost my car key - and just found it. it was in the fucking kitchen sink.
Lauren: omg
Nadia: I'm angry about this.
Nadia: ((anger))
Lauren: what if someone had rinsed it down the drain?!
Nadia: ...my car key?
Lauren: yeah
Nadia: Nobody here does dishes.
Nadia: It was TOTALLY safe.
Lauren: oh thank god

Dieter on being evil.

Nadia: You're like the devil.
Dieter: Huh?
Nadia: It's like, you can perfectly - and logically - justify anything. Oh, hey, I want to go do this totally immoral thing... and you're like, Yeah, go for it!
Dieter: ...
Nadia: It's like talking to Satan.
Dieter: ... Have you ever heard of opinionistas?
Nadia: That's exactly what Satan would say.

Lauren on children:

Lauren: If you have a girl, you could name her after me.
Lauren: And then it's namesake day or whatever can be the day I found out I was in teen people
Nadia: OMG! YAY!

Me on Lauren (talking to an editor):

Nadia: She keeps mentioning the teen people thing.
Editor: Meaning?
Nadia: She keeps working it into conversation.
Editor: ...good for her. it's a big deal - plus, that sounds kind of difficult to do...
Nadia: Not really. "Remember that time, when I used to drink water -- and I was in teen people?"

Dieter on Being Different From Lauren:

Dieter: No, that's seriously F*cked up. Even ask Lauren. I bet she'll agree.
Nadia: haha... Ok, I'll call her.
Dieter: And you know - if Lauren and I ever agree on ANYTHING that means you should do it right away.

Dieter's editor on Dieter's name:

Editor: Why don't you call him by his name? His real name is Dieter!
Nadia: Because I don't like "Dieter."
Editor: You just can't change people's names!
Nadia: ...

Dieter on Man-Boobs:

Dieter: So, this rich millionaire guy - whatever - bets this guy 5 million dollars to get breasts and keep them for a year --
Nadia: ...Wait, is this considered a sexual conversation?
Dieter: No.
Nadia: No?
Dieter: There is absolutely NOTHING erotic about some old fat football-watching guy walking around with breasts.
Nadia: Point.
Dieter: ...and at the end of the year, he can choose to keep them or have another plastic surgery to get rid of them. But, really - I mean, it's probably cool for a week or so. When you can fondle them - but even that gets old!
Nadia: ::cough::
Dieter: ... and then a month later, the celebrity wears off and then you have 11 months of ridicule. The psychological damage of having breasts.
Nadia: I have breasts. I wouldn't get them for five million dollars.
Dieter: Yes, but this is a GUY.
Nadia: I know... but I'm just saying...
Dieter: Oh, ok.

Me on Dieter not answering his phone yesterday:

Dieter: Hey.
Nadia: You're alive? Or is this your ghost?
Dieter: ((long pause)) ... Ohhhh I'm a ghost. I was buried with my cell phone.
Nadia: Great, if I was gonna bury you I'd do it with a cell phone. So I could call and say, "Did you finish the manuscript yet?"

My mother is romanian and in her world they have two "birthdays" - one to actually celebrate the day they were born and one where they celebrate their namesake (which is usually a saint). This is their name day, and they have a little birthday-like celebration. Is this an actual Romanian tradition? I have NO idea -- considering the only Romanians I know are the ones I'm related to... It could all be a big con to get more presents (that is SOoooo my mother. And can we note that I'm not named after a saint? No extra presents for me?) - but nevertheless, I was reminded of my own namesake today because Fox has an article running on PERFECT 10S in sports history.

Nadia Comaneci - 30 years ago today - received her first perfect 10 (and then a bunch more). Here's the actual article: http://www.livejournal.com/update.bml

The last line is: "Nadia was first. Nadia was best. Nadia was perfect. Happy anniversary, Nadia."

Now, aside from wanting to forward that to friends, family, (exboyfriends, exemployers, current clients), strangers (haha... yeah blog!)... I started thinking about what it meant.

No, no... I know they aren't talking about me. I'm not DELUSIONAL.

But -- let's examine the actual statements:

Was first...was best... was perfect...

Right afterwards there was a russian girl who got two perfect tens, in gymnastics... who the hell was she? (Can't remember her name either? No kidding. She wasn't first).

Why do we always remember those who came first, who did the best, who had it "perfect"?
(Perfect, for my purposes - are quantified in relation to everything else... so, just, "better than everyone else" and "more perfect than everyone else")

How difficult is it to do something for the first time?
How much more difficult is it to do something better the second time around?
How many sequels suck?
How many times have you heard, "This work is _so_ derivative!"
or "I've seen this done before."
or "Writing in emails or IMs is _So_ overdone."

It's not because it isn't a perfectly acceptable way of doing things, it's because that when you are the first person to do a thing...any thing (accidentally or on purpose) you get a certain amount of bump-room.

You get "the benefit of the doubt"-room, because -- if you're first, there is absolutely no standard to which others are going to judge you.

This can be good & bad. I mean, if you're writing in a whole new genre or something, it's terribly difficult to break out (first, it's terribly difficult to write a whole new genre... but neither here nor there). Because there is no precedent to how well you can do, so those cute little profit & loss statements are worth nill.

P&Ls... Now, I'm by no means an expert on these things (haha... ahem)... but if you want to get a great idea of what they are/do -- go check out Anna G's blog (Tor Editor).
But, here's my take (and feel free to disagree with me on this... or on anything. My blog, I can still say whatever I want):

In the medical field most doctor's (general practicioners - the ones that you go to with your bumps & bruises) generally do not do any kind of research. They diagnose. Which means they basically take all the symptoms they can find -- and compare them to illnesses they've heard of/have experience/research in and find the most likely disease. Thankfully there are quite a few diseases that we know about...

But, like for instance, my dad worked in Sierra Leone for the United Nations. Last year, he worked with this guy who would - every day - take a pill that fights malaria. (Malaria is a big thing there...) And he would gloat and boast about never getting malaria. YAY for him. Except when he went home (Yugoslavia) - he stopped taking the pill, and he - surprise - had carried the virus with him and it reared its ugly head in Yugoslavia. He had malaria (after all that careful planning) and his liver was all screwed up from years of taking these damn pills... any way, he went to his doctor and they went, "We don't know what you have, but we know that you're going to die from it." He said, F*ck that, and got on the first plane back to the condo - where they knew how to treat Malaria.

(This was a much funnier story the way my dad told it)
My point is -- Malaria is Malaria no matter where you are - but if you don't have any experience with it, if there is no precedent, how are you going to know how to treat it?

Ok - which brings us back to P&Ls... which generally make an editor come up with an educated guess as to how well a book will do. There is a lot of math involved in these intricate algorithms (but note, the formula is different for each publisher), but when it comes down to it -- they have a little give & take to play with the numbers (sometimes too little), but basically they are basing the numbers the plug in on how other, similar, projects have done. The closer the match, the better the formula works.

What happens when you can't find a match?
The same thing that happens when you're trying to sell your house and find a comparable property (like, they find one that sold recently at the same size/scope and then they can give you an idea of how much Yours is worth) - what if your property is unique? Too big/too small compared to the other houses...something is different that makes it hard to compare. They have to guess what the differences would be worth and add or subtract them from your total...

Ok, again, too many analogies --- but, if you're book is new, unique --- that simply means its HARD TO SELL. Hard to sell to an agent who will look at your query letter and think, "eehhh... what?" hard to sell to an editor who will have to justify it to their publisher. Hard to sell to a marketing/sales team who will be given a task of making a NEW SET OF RULES to market/sell your book (way too much work, all around).

How do you combat this?

1) Figure out if you really are doing something new. A lot of people think they are doing something new, when they really haven't educated themselves enough to realize they are repeating an OLD trend. There is a great quote that goes, "There is nothing new under the sun." -- and funny enough, this quote has been re-written and spouted in a million ways. Haha... ironic. There is nothing I hate more than a query letter that says, "There are no books out there with elves! I wrote one!!!" ...um. Think again darling.

2) If you're doing something new - decide that it's really important to have done. I'm not saying it is or isn't. I'm saying, if you can justify it to yourself, outside the realm of "I want to" -- then you can probably justify it to someone else. and You'll probably have to (if you want to sell it).

3) When you're pitching it... do not highlight how it's different. Do not say that it's the first novel that blends together EVERY COMMERCIAL SUBGENRE EVER! That will make my head spin. Concentrate on the important character or plot and suck me in that way -- so that I'm hooked by the time I'm reading it and by the time I'm done, I know it'll be a pain in the butt to sell, but i know it SHOULD be sold.

4) And...as always... be professional. Even agents know their limits. If I think it's great but I can't sell it - I'll probably tell you so. Don't take this as a straight rejection. Take it as a compliment and keep trying. Remember, the first rule is to always keep working... the difference between failure and success is persistence.

XOXO
Dia

Oh yeah... Happy Namesake day to me!!!

I can't believe I'm up this late.
But I write my best blog entries when I'm slightly delirious from lack of sleep - that and I'm already a little miffed because I was talking with a friend and he FELL ASLEEP on the phone with me. ...I thought I was being amusing & entertaining... and then I thought he was doing something naughty - but turns out he was just sleeping. I finally hung up (afer I spent a good few minutes calling his name trying to wake him up, and then laughing my head off about the whole thing).

If you ever thought my life was in any way glamorous - let this be a lesson to you.
Glamorous people do not have their friends fall asleep on the phone with them - in the midst of conversation, no less.

So I was thinking (this is what I do at 3 in the morning) about different weird publicity/marketing concepts for books. I have a great one that I want to try out -- but it's a second hard cover book type of promotion. So, I think I might email it to an author I know and see if they'll experiment with it for me -- and if it works, YAY!!!

Marketing & Publicity for your books is a really hard thing to get your head around. Amanda (one of my clients) and I were talking about this earlier - and she asked if book tours/signings/events in general are good and effective. And I said, depends on the book - because no matter how much marketing & publicity you do - if your book isn't in the store, marketing ain't gonna help you.

So, I'll repeat what I was told: the best use of your time & money after writing your first book is to spend it reinvesting in your writing career - in order to become a better writer. I.e. Things that will help your craft and business (like a new lap top or a writing retreat or membership to RWA, that sort of thing).

Not to say that you should ever be lazy when it comes to promoting your book - but you don't have to arrange a ten city tour with money out of your own pocket when your first book comes out. It won't be the most effective use of your time/resources.

While we have a marketing booklet - (which is a lot of the same material that I used to hand out at marketing workshops) - we're working on a "idea" book - which will basically be a compilation of every idea (both zainy & sane) for marketing books we've ever heard or thought of. And trust me, there are a lot of weird things that will end up in this book. And then each will be 'categorized' in the following manner:

Book Rank: (first time author, second book, sequel, hard cover, paperback original, best seller, almost out of print, etc)
Author: (Introvert, Outgoing, Established, New)
Stage: (pre publication, first week, first month, first three months)
Cost (self-explanatory)
Level of Commitment (from Author/Publisher/Agent) - is it high, medium or low? What resources are needed and who will supply them?
Details of how to produce or recreate the 'event'
and special links or people to talk to for more information

Some of them are more basic, like doing a drive-by signing (i.e. a stock signing) and others are very complicated... like one of my clients & I are working on creatign a MUD for his book as a promotional tool (he rocks - I'll talk more about this another time). One of my clients created an AIM BOT to answer questions about his book (I need to do that!!!) and....

Well you get the idea.
The best part is - you don't really NEED any kind of background to create your own Publicity Idea Book.
Go get a binder and some paper & pens -- and then sit down and brainstorm. Create ideas. think of everything and anything that is outrageous and fun and would get people talking about your book, visiting your website (over and over again - one time is good - ten time is better) and -- get them excited about what you have to say.

:)

Ok - I'm off, now I'm tired....
xo
Dia

It's Friday Morning...

Let's see the list of things that have to be done today - yesterday I got contracts out (to authors, from authors, to publishers, from publishers). That was cool. I had a bunch on my desk and some I had to review and we got ALL of them panned out in ONE day. Glorious!!!

Otherwise? It's 9:20 am... and since half of the publishing industry seems to have taken off for the long weekend (already - scoff), I've decided to take off too. Of course, I'll have my cell & my fabby-wabby Mac. (Wow - that was dumb). So, I'll be reading for a good part of the day.

Around 3 pm I'll be in Maryland at a drum corps show... Saturday morning I have a board meeting to go to (yawn) and then Saturday afternoon another DC show -- It's back to back geekdom!!! Wooo Hooooo....

Otherwise, what am I doing this weekend?

I'll probably make a big ol' list of things to do on Wednesday (because it's a short week and everyone is hopefully doing a lot of reading over the weekend). I need to follow up on submissions (...why does the reading get SO SLOW in the summer?), create a few pitch letters, harrass a few clients (muah ha ha).

YAY!!!
More Later,
Dia

Ode to My Mac

Oh Mac!
I love you.
I love to wipe the small bits of dust from your white, white cover
I love that you are made out of completely synthetic material that GE invented
I love that I can take my own picture and make funny faces into the camera
I love that you back up on your own.
I love that you are 13" (and not at all a braggart)
OH MAC!
I love you.
I think we have something going here...
and I'd be willing to dump Dan Lazar for you.
Because he shows up our lunches with things that look suspiciously like hickies
and I'm the jealous type
and I know you would never hurt me (and if you did, I could reboot you).
OH MAC!
I love you.
You have a separate calendar, email and address book...
but they all work TOGETHER.
In perfect unity.
harmony.
Love.
OH Mac...
We belong together - I can't believe it took me so long to find you.
Let us stay together always.
I will bring you with me everywhere (you can have the left side of the bed).
OH MAC!!!
Glorious, Glorious Mac.
I love how Rob (the guy at the Mac Store) told me you'd change my life.
And I scoffed....Until he opened you.
and then I oohed. I ahhhed.
I swooned....

Oh mac.
I love you.

It's official - Lauren's REALITY CHICK is in the upcoming issue of TEEN PEOPLE as a must-have for August.
Soooooooo ------ cool.

I'm taking Lauren on a stock-signing tour later in the month through NJ and some of NYC -- (YAY! Road Trip!!!).
I have to talk to her publicist about particulars. I'm so excited for her. And for me, of course.

A lot of my authors have been having AMAZING things happen with their books -- It's weird to spend almost two years selling books without anything on the shelves - you almost forget (haha) that that part is going to happen.

I spent hours a couple of weeks ago making income projections based on my goals and saying, "well, this isn't bad..." and then Caren went, yeah - and that's not even all of it... I looked at her like, HUH? and she was like, "Yeah, you only took into account the books you're going to sell. So that money/figures just accounts for advances. You didn't figure in anything about royalties or subrights in there..."

HOLY SHIT. She was right.

I danced a jig... basically Caren & I figured out if we work like absolute dogs for the next 15 years - we'll both be able to retire at 40.
heh.

So, I read 1/2 of Lauren's second YA book ROAD TRIP last night... ::sigh:: I wish the industry moved a little faster.
Of course, so do my clients (except when it comes to deadlines). Kelly is working on hers as we speak, and I'm so excited for her first SALEM WITCH TRY OUTS book to be coming out this fall. YAY.

And Simone's HOW TO RUIN A SUMMER VACATION is one of the launch titles for FLUX -- AWESOME -- this FALL.
Tina's TOP 10 USES FOR AN UNWORN PROM DRESS is garnering TONS of in house sales interest.
Adam is starting his own little industry...

Anwyay. YAY!
Ok - time to get all my books sold. That's my goal for the next six months.
LEAVE NO BOOK BEHIND.

I'll report back more later on my progress. Send me notes to keep me motivated.
XO
Dia

Who here can confirm the following...

Has anyone seen a recent copy of TeenPeople (the issue that just came out)?
I believe Lauren's REALITY CHICK is in it....
need a confirm.

xo
Thanks all!

Ok... This is going to be a long post. Let's time it -- it's currently 6:07 pm.

I don't think I've posted in... erm.. a month? Trust me, I've been wanting to!
But sometimes it's like calling your grandmother... You know you should, and then you end up putting it off, and by the time you remember you don't want to get yelled at (just then) so you put it off again... and then it's been a month and she's written you out of her will...

...That is if your grandmother is anything like mine.

Grandma: Nadia! Why don't you just throw me from the car?!
Me: Wait a sec, let me speed up a bit.
Grandma: You're an ungrateful [starts swearing in Romanian...]
Me: Grandma! You're an elderly person, you're not supposed to say things like that.
Grandma: [Swears louder, in Romanian... sprinkles with English, so I can keep up]

I love my grandma. She's cool...
Even if she does tell me (every time I see her): Did you gain weight?
Me: No Gram, I actually lost five pounds.
Gram: Heh - You look like you've gained weight.

Anyway!!! A million and one things to share and so little time and energy in which to do it.
What has been happening in the past month?

Well - let's see...

Two of my clients are dating. Which wouldn't be such a weird occurance (my clients are pretty cool, they should be up to dating...) if they weren't dating one another. YES, you heard me correctly. TWO OF MY CLIENTS ARE DATING EACH OTHER. and Yes, I'm the one who introduced them...my own fault? I'm not sure how I feel about it, other than happy that they are happy. Which is fine, I suppose, I've already taken sides - just to pre-empt any fights, breakups or other bad-news. I chose his side, she definitely seems like the more dramatic one...

A few weeks ago I told an agent-friend who shall remain nameless (DAN LAZAR) that we should get married. He responded with: You should ask me on your blog! Or - even better - make it interactive so all your blog readers can vote on how you should ask me. My first thought was, Why the hell am I doing the asking? So, let's take a preliminary vote: Should I ask Dan Lazar to marry me? Or should Dan Lazar ask me? (and choose carefully... the state of the publishing industry as you know it may be at risk!)(ok, not really...)(choose him to ask me!)

Speaking of getting married (or not, as the case may be), a few people have taken it into their heads to set me up on dates (I think I must look lonely)(THIS IS WHY dan should ask me - I need the ego-boost). I'm not really a date-girl. But I really appreciate the thought. That said, I already agreed to go on two. But that's my limit. :) But feel free to send pictures of hot guys to my inbox (after next week)(see below).

---------------------

Ok, all that stuff aside...
I have bad news.
REALLY bad news.
Like, the worst news that you could ever imagine I would tell you x 2.

My computer exploded last Friday.
I flew out to California with it. It had been acting strangely for a few days - so I even brought my external hard drive with me ("Oh, I should back up in California!"). I was arguing with my best friend about something nonsensical and when I went to write him a nasty email - my computer wouldn't turn on.

Nothing.
It kept saying, Disk Error. Press Ctrl + Alt + Del to restart.
So, I'd press Ctrl + Alt + Del to restart.
And it would say, Disk Error. Press Ctrl + Alt + Del to restart.
So... I'd press... well, you get the idea.

I did this 15 times.
By the thirteenth I started to worry.
By the fourteenth I started to pray.
By the fifteenth I started to cry.

-- My hotel room was like the dramatic stage for the seven stages of grieving.
1) Shock/Disbelief: "I can't believe my lap top won't start - what's going on?"
2) Denial: "This can't be happening!!! No, there must be something else going on - it can't

...I was reading this article this morning about getting a board of directors to be better fundraisers (Don't ask - I swear I have an organizational fetish - and that extends to organizational management).

The second the line came from was titled, "Fundraising & Building Relationships" - which if you've ever done any kind of fundraising, you'll KNOW exactly what that is about... Anywhere there was one line that I really meant something to me. It basically asked, What relationship? If we ware only being nice to them so we can ask them for money (if not now, later), is that a relationship?

I think of building professional contacts & networking the same way. Not quite fundraising... because we're not asking for a donation, but we are asking for money, aren't we? When we meet with editors/agents (as authors) we're often looking for something. Money? Connections? A leg-up? When agents & editors meet - we're looking for something. Money? Connections? A leg-up?

And while I don't think this article was saying that you should take money completely out of the equation - I believe that it WAS saying that you should build a relationship regardless.

Let's bring this back in, so it makes sense:

When you go to a conference -- you're not there to sell your book (agent/editor/author).

Nobody brings book contracts with them to conferences and says, "Wow, that's the best idea ever! Here's a contract - we'll worry about the actual writing later." (Actually, Jenny Crusie & Bob Mayer gave a great key note on this in Chicago -- made the subsequent pitch sessions a dream).

I feel the same way about networking. I HATE going to networking events. I usually find one of two things there: 1) At least one person with a stack of business cards that walks around the room saying things like: "Trade you?" or 2) At least one person walking around saying, "You two have been talking for quite a while, why don't you mingle?!"

…To which my response always is:
1) No.
2) No.

Why this type of behavior is ok in the business world is beyond me -- because a connection is nothing. You want a meaningful connection and you can't find meaning in "trade you?"

Building relationships professionally should be like building relationships sexually. "Trading" makes you a slut (or rather, makes you indiscriminate) and makes each individual connection that much less important and meaningful.

When I meet an editor for lunch, I don't bring a pitch list (i.e. blurbs of all the projects I'm currently marketing or info on my 'sold' authors)… because then the editor feels obligated to glance over it, and I sit there twiddling my thumbs for ten minutes while she scans. UGH. I want her to know that I'm only sending her things I think she will like. I stopped bringing pitch lists the first time an editor asked for something and my first reaction was, "Eek, I was planning on sending that to her co-worker. Awkward."

Now, at lunches, we talk. And gush. And I ask questions.
How do you do what you do? Why do you do what you do? Do you love it as much as I do?

You learn a lot about people from their answers to these types of questions.
I love asking, "What do I need to know about you?"

When I first started at CMA (and was blissfully unaware) I called Sharyn November to introduce myself and see what she was looking for. She answered the questions above without me having to ask them (actually, that's why I ask them now…) and since then, I've only had one project I ever thought was right for her… but I'm absolutely dying to find one that would be a good fit. I think she's amazing. I loved her 'answers' and would love to have one of my clients work with her.

I like to recommend editors to other agents I know, or mention a project that I know they are pitching… why? Some of it is more self-serving than the rest -- but 1) Good Book Karma, 2) Others have done it for me and I always thought it sho

It's 8am. I'm giving a workshop on author self-promotion at 11am. But the meeting starts at 9am. so am I supposed to be there at nine or at eleven? Perhaps I'll shoot for ten. Or nine. UGH! I don't want to sit around for two hours, but I like getting places early so that I have a chance to interact with people prior to "talking" - that way I feel like I'm talking to people I know rather than an anonymous group. Also, it makes it easier to pick out the nodders.

I'll define nodder in a moment - but first let me say that if it weren't for nodders - I'd never, ever talk in front of a group of people.

Ok - Nodders are the people who display physical body clues that they get or do not get what you are saying. If they are confused, they tilt their heads to the side. If they get it, and you are jiving, they begin to nod their heads (hence the name - you want them ALWays to be nodding)...if they start shaking their heads... well, you've gone off on a tangent too far from where you need to be. Time to pause and say, "Let's get back on track" or "Let's explain that a little more." There is usually at least one nodder in the group. They are usually natural smilers. They are usually women. I ALWAYs look for the Nodder when I begin -- I don't focus on that person (it would freak them out), but I look back at them during my talk to make sure we're going where we need to go.

WHY? Why not look at everyone? -- well, me in particular? I'm a doodle-thinker. When I'm absorbing something, I need to have my hands active and so I doodle around the edge of my paper... but this is how I best retain information - but it used to drive my professors crazy because they'd think I was bored/not paying attention. A lot of people do certain things when they are paying attention that are misleading to a speaker. Checking their watch (OY!!!), looking around the room, whispering to a friend, shuffling papers. These things are big red flags that they aren't "into" what you are saying - but often, these are the people who later come up to me and recite back something I just said and tell me how they liked it/got it/made it their own. so... You pick the person with the most straight forward visual cues... the Nodder.

And then -- it's a matter of negotiations (everything is a negotiation... damn, I love agenting). I don't remember the exact rules for negotiation. Or perhaps it was more for conning someone ... Hm. But it's totally Glengarry Glen Ross (I LOVE this movie): AIDA - Attention, Interest, Decision, Action... You do the same with a huge audience. You really are trying to sell them something. some people do this naturally -- and watching them is like watching... the tide roll back. It's smooth and can move mountains. And you see a sea of attentive eyes and nodding heads and it's awesome. Go watch anyone who talks in public and see if you can't break it down into the sales pitch -- how they get your attention. How they get your interest, how they ask you to do something and then ask you to take action... It's kinda cool. Now, I don't go to many readings, but the good ones I've attended do the same thing -- but it's MUCh, MUCH harder, because remember... you're asking them to do something almost sub-consciously (and no, I don't mean to buy your book - the entire event is asking them to buy your book - if you have to say it...well..You screwed up your pitch). But it's all about the passage... and the execution.

One of my favorite readings EVER was watching my client Lawrence speak at a sci fi convention last year. He read a short story and it was fabulous. He's smooth at it. He's great -- I think because he was a teacher/professor. a Good teacher/professor is often a better public speaker (lots of practice)?

Which led me to believe that a portion of it is natural talent - but you can grow in HUGE quantities by practicing. Like writing, right?

Anyway -- That's why I do speaking things even though I hate speaking in public. I'm waiting for that magical second wind where it bec

"Focus more on your desire than on your doubt, and the dream will take care of itself. You may be surprised at how easily this happens. Your doubts are not as powerful as your desires, unless you make them so." -- Marcia Wieder

You know how one of the coolest things about working for yourself is not having to get all dressed up all the time, right? Today - I got dressed up, just for myself. Skirt, sandals, cute little pink shirt - blah blah blah. And four people (so far, it's only 8:30) have said, "Don't you look nice!" which makes me wonder what kinda of pila-cr*p I look like the rest of the time.

A lot of people believe that what you look like shouldn't matter - I happen to believe the same thing, while in the back of my head I know it _does_ matter. When I have to talk in front of people, I always wear jeans. I know it's extremely unprofessional, but they are my "comfort blanket" and make me feel comfortable and casual... so I'm less stressed and not hyperventilating, tugging at clothing, making sure my skirt isn't riding up as I flash the poor people in the first three rows (did that guy just wink at me?). But when it's a situation where I feel like I need more umph. Where I'm not comfortable with my position in the environment (i.e. meeting someone I want to do business with but don't know) I feel more comfortable getting dressed up.

Which brings us back to working for yourself.

I used to read a lot of books for self-employed individuals (I actually line-edited one, way back when) and one thing they all agreed on is that when you go to work - even if you are only crossing your apartment (or even your bedroom) you should be fully dressed to start the day.

Same reasoning says that if you smile when you are on the phone, people can "hear" it... I smile when I'm on the phone. But I'm a natural smiler. I know someone who is NOT a natural smiler, and I supppose - if I saw him walking around smiling, I'd wonder what he was on. But if I walk around not smiling (deep in thought or whatever) people ask me if I'm feeling sick.

So. Tangent.

Back to my point:

- A lot of people (myself included) complain that their family and friends do not take their writing/work seriously. If you don't take it seriously (and showing up to work in sweats and those really comfy bunny slippers is not exactly taking it seriously) why should they?

Which brings me to my next point...

(And I'm doing a simpsons episode here. Starting in one place, only to end up in a completely different place by the end - with nary an idea of how it happened)

If YOU don't take YOURSELF seriously, NO ONE ELSE WILL.

Mantra, mantra, mantra.

What does that mean?

Do NOT belittle yourself, your writing, your dreams. Don't do it in a query letter (yes, I know - that should be obvious - but it happens so often) - if you don't respect your own talent and time, why should I?

I don't really know all of you (apparently there are more people who read this blog than I know), but I think each of us has aspirations and we have to make time to go after those things.

We're all busy. They are called kids, families, spouses, lawn care... jobs, bosses, parents, friends... It's called life. Everyone has got one. My to-do list isn't any more impressive than anyone else's. We all have responsibilities and needs. SO. Don't think I'm downplaying your responsibilities and needs when I say this, but...

You need to take time to 'sharpen the saw' as Franklin Covey says.
To enrich your life. Move towards your dreams. Grow. Develop. Pray (if that moves you). Exercise. Dream. Think. Speak. Laugh. Educate. Learn... Whatever.

5 minutes. Cut out the cigarette/coffee break.
Take time out from watching your favorite tv show. Spend some time getting to know yourself and what you want and WHO you want to be... and then begin to work in that direction.

Ok. Back to work. XO

Dia

I'm not working yet.
It's only 7:30, but I've got my laptop open... so, I have about thirty minutes before the * hits the fan and I have to get down to it.

And look - I'm sharing them with you! (I can tell you're excited...).
At least one person just unfriended me. :D

I heard there is a website out there that has pictures of people's desks uploaded to it... I guess to shame everyone into cleaning off their desks - or for those ridiculous few of us who already have clean desks, it gives us the opportunity to gloat and preen - and aren't our mother's proud?

My mother isn't proud. My desk is a mess. The other day - Jeremy walked into my office and said, 'Mommy, you need to clean your office.' -- Yeah, yeah, go do your homework. :> so, that's a priority for today... it's mostly filing paperwork and shelving stuff - you know the little bits of stuff that seem so unimportant until you have fifty piles on your desk - and the only thing that's holding them up is another pile. It's Janga in here. Pull a piece ... see if it all falls down.

But I've loaded some ska for cleaning. Anything with brass makes cleaning faster. Trust me.

Yesterday I actually got in a fight with a friend of mine over his un-organizational skills. It normally drives me a little batty, especially when we're supposed to work on something together and he finally says, "I'm just not organized. I'm never going to BE organized." I wanted to cry. Because while my desk _is_ a mess - I'm an organizational freak.

I love PDAs, I love my planner. I love calendars and task lists. I have to-do lists. I have lists of lists. I LIKE rewriting my to do lists. It's neurotic and o.c.d. but ... I L.O.V.E. it.

This is what I do:

1) I "brain dump" (I've suddenly found a bunch of other people that do this, too -- and they even use the same word. ha!) - where I list everything that I have to do, in no particular order. I just need to get it out of my head. I usually do it before I go to bed (otherwise I'll be jumping out of bed every five minutes to do things.

Today's Brain Dump

I need to email my clients that I haven't talked to this week and make sure I get out the revision that didn't want to go through my email last week. I need to call Phoebe's editor. Get business cards printed out for all of us indicating the new address. Change/update the website. Design a cute postcard to mail to contact list regarding the address change (letters to editors that have our books/contracts on the old address). Catch up with Caren regarding two outstanding contracts. Call back the software people and see if we can adjust the payment schedule by one month. Email my accountant our quarterly report. shelve the books and catalogs on my desk. Go through recent submissions. Forward appropriate material to Caren or Megan. Change the website to announce Megan's arrival. Call a few agent friends and put the word out that we're looking for a NF client. Put together a complete job description for the agency assistant starting this fall. Mail two checks. Head to the post office to pick up a registered mail thing. Go through bills. Arrange by pay date/call any that will be paid late. Go over a book proposal for Tricking. Call editor in Cali that i met at BEA and talk about the possibility of a new packaged line with her. Pitch a new MG project. Call Lori and schedule for lunch for next Thursday (or coffee?). Email Luc regarding his invoice - fax letter to his accountant.
Email the board of AM and see what date we've changed the meeting to. schedule out the weekend a little more specifically - and figure out when I'm going where -- Go over concept for a line of books on music education (power point?). Review notes for the workshop this weekend on promotion. Work on the agency promotional handbook. Revamp the client clip book - PDF it. Downloadable from the website? send material to the three places where I'll be speaking later this year - crap, sign up for Nationals, right

It's Monday night.
I'm supposed to be home (like an hour and a half ago), but I'm still here -- but I just finished, and was about to leave, but thought I'd catch all of you up on what's been happening.

Especially as I keep getting emails that I'm LJ-slacking. Sorry.

I didn't get Leah. :(
But, I'm kinda Rottweiler smitten now.
I'm going to look into breeders in the area and if anyone has a recommendation, I'll certainly use it! :)

I did BEA last week --
which was cool.
I drove in NJ to pick up Caren & Liesa Abrams (Razorbill | Penguin) up at the train station in New Brunswick... and then we drove down to Washington. It took us about four hours, but did include two potty breaks (although, I did make up for lost time by running one red light). Totally not on purpose. I'm not sure what it is.

And, I yelled at the both of them, while I had to pump my own gas in Maryland. "THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE HELP LADIES!!! NO REALLY, JUST SIT THERE! I'VE GOT IT!" -- To which they called me passive aggressive...which shut me up, as I spent at least an hour earlier picking my own brain apart. We talked about guys (me: none), work (me: lots), about love & loss...and the ability of the human being to be truly magnificient.

It was actually quite a trip.
We didn't turn on the radio at all...

There were quite a few inappropriate conversations, though (none of which, sadly, am I able to tell here... on the pain of death!), but it was so amazingly fun, truly. If you can ever take a road trip with Caren & Liesa. I totally recommend it.

So we get to Washington (or was it in Maryland?) that night, check in... and hang out in mine & Caren's room talking about... goodness knows what. I have no idea. At some point we came up with what we were talking about during our presentation on YA literature (we centered it around "high concept" YA projects - how to write & pitch it). Then I blow-dryed Caren's hair straight. It was way too Grease for me, especially when Caren pulled out the cigarette, I threw up and she pulled on a wig and started dancing.

Lying. No wig.
Kidding. No dancing either.
(or throwing up)

We went to bed after lamenting on how we totally didn't discuss our choice of wardrobe prior to leaving (damn) so we didn't really match. I had to dress up more than I like to for workshops (I like jeans, I'm comfortable in jeans)... but c'est la vie.

The next morning we were supposed to leave for the hotel (mapquested at 17.4 miles) and get to the conference center at 8:30. We left at ...erm... 8:15 and got there at 9:17 am -- running for our room and pausing before a locked seminar room and going, "Pfft... they can't even open the rooms on time?!?!" (hehe)

We did our workshop (we were brilliant)(trust me).

Then we hung out for an hour, I met my brilliantly cool editor at Writer's Digest. HI KELLY!
YOU PROBABLY DON"T EVEN READ THIS!!! HAHAH - YOU DON"T KNOW WHAT I"M SAYING ABOUT YOU.

And then went to the lunch where we proceeded to get lambasted for being "young looking."

Quote: "You can't possibly be more than what... 16?"

Oy. Not a good opening to conversing with editors & agents (who, yes, are young... well, Liesa isn't extremely young, but she looks quite young... and anyway... a lot of people in publishing are young!!!) But that was uncomfortable. Eventually, an author cuts off the other ones that were running off at the mouth (saying things that probably shouldn't have been said) and he says: "Well, no one at this table is getting published." and I swear, I laughed. I shouldn't have, but I did.

So... After that? We did an agent panel. Where I met the LOVELY Lori Perkins. Love, love, love her. And then did a pitch slam -- where I heard some great pitches and met an obnoxious author named Patrick. (ARE YOU READING THIS PATRICK?) ...Patrick did write a very cute sounding story... which I "awwwwww"ed my way through - which pro