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Dear Reader,

I hope for your sake, that you have not choosen to read this book because you are in the mood for a pleasant experience. If this is the case, I advise you to put this book down instantaneously, because of all the books describing the unhappy lives of the Baudelaire orphans, The Miserable Mill might be the unhappiest yet. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudeliare are sent to Paltr... More

Dear Reader,

I hope for your sake, that you have not choosen to read this book because you are in the mood for a pleasant experience. If this is the case, I advise you to put this book down instantaneously, because of all the books describing the unhappy lives of the Baudelaire orphans, The Miserable Mill might be the unhappiest yet. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudeliare are sent to Paltryville to work in a lumbermill, and they find disaster and misfortune luring behing every log.

The pages of this book, I'm sorry to inform you, contain such unpeasantries as a giant pincher machine, a bad casserole, a man with a cloud of smoke where his head should be, a hypnotist, a terrible accident resulting in injury, and coupons.

I have promised to write down the entire history of these three poor children, buy you haven't, so if you prefer stories that are more heartwarming, please feel free to make another selection.

With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket

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