Four of a Kind by Valerie Frankel
“A man’s growth is seen in the successive choirs of his friends.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
I sat down to write this review in the same manner I write every review. I wanted to diplomatically describe the details of the book (something you can easily find on Amazon or Goodreads and therefore do not need me to repeat here). I was then going to give my impression of the book, where the author excelled, what was interesting about the plot, describe the challenges the four main characters faced in their lives (at home, at work, in love). All of this would have been interesting and informative but it would also be stagnant. It would be run-of-the-mill. It would be something you could find in the hundreds of reviews on line or in magazines and newspapers. It would be something you could find just by reading the book yourself. (Which I highly recommend you do!)
Instead, I want to do things a little differently. I want to explore the theme of this book and how it relates to life. Because isn’t that why we read fiction in the first place? To learn more about ourselves, to understand our lives, our hopes, dreams, fears, and failings?
Four of a Kind by Valerie Frankel (Ballantine Books, February 7, 2012) is a novel about FRIENDSHIP.
Friendship is crucial in life. It is an integral part of our happiness. Strong social ties are key to happiness. Gretchen Rubin in her book, The Happiness Project, routinely points out that “To be happy we have to feel strongly connected to other people.” She even has a post on her blog with 8 Tips for Making Friends. In that post she talks about how the “mere exposure effect” makes you like someone better. Basically, just by repeatedly seeing the same people, you will, in fact, like them better. Another tip she gives is to join a group. “Being part of a natural group, where you have common interest and are brought together automatically, is the easiest way to make friends.”
This is what happens in Valerie Frankel’s completely entertaining novel, Four of a Kind. Four women are brought together as part of a school diversity committee, each woman has a child in the same school. Ironically, the diversity committee is a very diverse group, women who would never be friends if not forced together. On a whim, the women end up playing a game of Texas Hold’em, but instead of money the currency is secrets. Secrets in their marriage, secrets with their careers, their children, their parents. Every woman has a secret in her life and even though she keeps them close to her heart and aches because of them, she is really just looking for the right person to tell. When these secrets (and worries and fears and hopes) begin to come out, the women realize they are bonded more closely than they ever could have imagined. These women found each other and as a result have built honest, beautiful, complicated relationships.
Rachel Bertsche’s website and book, MWF Seeking BFF, was devoted to the challenge of finding friendship once yo