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I did not write these tips. These tips, and many more like these, can be found at Common Errors in English. So, if you disagree with these rules, then please, don’t kill the messenger. These are here just for your learning/entertainment, nothing more, and nothing less.
Now that you know my disclaimer, let’s move on to the juicy stuff … *rubs hands together in glee* …
(Some of these seem pretty obvious – but if you read as many blogs as I do – you’d be surprised how many confused people there are out there. I don’t care how much it is argued, grammatically incorrect writing makes writers look foolish).
1. BULLION/BOUILLON: Gold bricks are bullion. Boil down meat stock to get bouillon. It’s an expensive mistake to confuse bullion with bouillon in a recipe.
2. BAILOUT/BAIL OUT: Whether you are bailing out a rowboat or a bank, use the two-word spelling to describe the action of doing it (the verb form): “we need to bail out the boat before we can go fishing.”
But to label the activity itself (the noun form), use the one-word spelling: “this bailout is going to be expensive.”
3. BLINDSIGHTED/BLINDSIDED: When you are struck by surprise from an unexpected direction, you are blindsided, as if from your blind side. Do not be confused by the many punning titles using the deliberate misspelling “blindsighted” into using the latter spelling for this meaning.
4. BOUYANT/BUOYANT: Buoys are buoyant. In the older pronunciation of “buoyant” as “bwoyant” this unusual spelling made more sense. Now that the pronunciation has shifted to “boyant” we have to keep reminding ourselves that the U comes before the O. The root noun, however, though often pronounced “boy” is more traditionally pronounced “BOO-ee.”
5. BREACH/BREECH: Substitute a K for the CH in “breach” to remind you that the word has to do with breakage: you can breach (break through) a dam or breach (violate the terms of) a contract. As a noun, a breach is something broken off or open, as in a breach in a military line during combat.
“Breech” however, refers to rear ends, as in “breeches” (slang spelling “britches” ). Thus “breech cloth,” “breech birth,” or “breech-loading gun.”
“Once more unto the breach, dear friends,” means “let’s charge into the gap in the enemy’s defenses,” not “let’s reach into our pants again.”
6. BAITED BREATH/BATED BREATH: Although the odor of the chocolate truffle you just ate may be irresistible bait to your beloved, the proper expression is “bated breath.” “Bated” here means “held, abated.” You do something with bated breath when you’re so tense you’re holding your breath.
7. BEHAVIORS: “Behavior” has always referred to patterns of action, including multiple actions, and did not have a separate plural form until social scientists created it. Unless you are writing in psychology, sociology, anthropology, or a related field, it is better to avoid the use of “behaviors” in your writing.
8. BASED AROUND, BASED OFF OF/BASED ON: You can build a structure around a center; but bases go on the bottom of things, so you can’t base something around something else.
Similarly, you can build something off of a starting point, but you can’t base anything off of anything. Something is always based on something else.
9. BOUGHTEN/BOUGHT: “Bought, ” no
0 Comments on Thursday Thirteen: Thirteen (More) Common Writing Mistakes as of 1/1/1900
Some of my favorite Post Secrets. I’m posting these because they resonate with me on some level. What’s your favorite secret?
1.
And it’s a sobering day. (That day has come for me).
2.
Though the man is certainly not blameless in this scenario, I sort of wonder if the woman chose to focus on her revenge instead of the role SHE played in the break up.
3.
This is my secret. (Well. I didn’t send this secret in, but I very well could have). I often feel guilty for having such a good life.
4.
It sounds to me the woman doing the spying has more issues than the person she’s is spying on.
5.
Bitterness much? This makes me wonder what sort of relationship this is and I can’t help but feel sorry for the guy. (Though he may be a jerk to her, does he really deserve food poisoning? What a vindictive thing to do).
6.
I understand this secret. Some things just aren’t meant to be shared – with anyone.
7.
Actually. I think this person has a lot of courage – for staying.
8.
I’m betting they don’t care. Instead of focusing on the poor part, how about teaching the kids the value of managing money wisely?
9.
There is only one person I’ve ever felt like this with and as fate would have it, I ended up working with her. I found out she was actually quite nice.
10.
If you don’t trust him enough to NOT read his emails, then why are you with him? Trust has to start somewhere.
Some of my favorite Post Secrets. I’m posting these because they resonate with me on some level. What’s your favorite secret?
1.
And it’s a sobering day. (That day has come for me).
2.
Though the man is certainly not blameless in this scenario, I sort of wonder if the woman chose to focus on her revenge instead of [...]
Because I keep meaning to write this stuff down and I need to post something for today, I’m going to kill two birds with one stone and do both.
It’s called multi-tasking … I think. *grin*
Here are thirteen upcoming articles that I’ve been wanting to write about for quite some time – maybe this will help organize the sludge of ideas that are swirling around in my head.
Exercise
1. Body expectations – Get Real
2. Think Before You Eat – It’s a Constant Compromise
3. Move It – Finding the exercise that works for you
4. Getting Into the Habit – Start Slow
5. Measure Inches, Not Pounds
6. Stop Being Lazy
Relationships
7. Should I Cut My Hair Short if my Husband Likes it Long?
8. Getting to Know Your Spouse All Over Again
9. You Want Your Relationship to Change? It Starts With You
10. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff and Work on the Big Stuff
Parenting
11. Is College Really Necessary?
12. Talking Politics with the Kids
13. Allowing the Kids to Be Their Own People, and Not What We WANT Them to Be
Wow. I feel soooo much better after writing these out. They are topics that have been weighing heavily on my mind and I will do my best to post these articles as soon as I can.
Is there anything you would like me to talk about? Any issues you’d like my opinion on? Anything you’d like to know about me? I’ll do my best to try and give you my perspective but I do reserve the right to decline if the subject matter is too sensitive and/or might cause strife with my family.
Hey. I have to live with these people, cut me some slack.
Aloha! Kailani is the brain-child behind this fun Friday meme. If you feel inclined to answer my question, please post your answer in the comment section. Sound fun? Of course it does! Want to answer more questions? Hop over to An Island Life and play along!
(Please feel free to answer the question below, even if you’re not playing Aloha Friday!)
Let’s do an easy one this time:
My question:
If you could shop for free at one store which one would you choose?
My answer: Definitely Amazon. The thought of free books actually makes me hyperventilate. AND, then I could turn around and sell them on my Amazon book store – what a deal!
(I realize these types of posts are pretty boring. But I like to record the boring things … it gives me a sense of what our lives were like at the time).
Friday
Kevin came home about 1:00. He had gone to lunch with his soon-to-be ex-boss. In fact, he did this last Friday and will probably [...]
It’s not often that my husband laughs at emails that have been forwarded to him, so when I heard him cracking up one morning and asked him what was so funny, he sent me the following church bulletins. And apparently? These really appeared on billboards and church newsletters.
1. The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
2. The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’ The sermon tonight: ‘Searching for Jesus.’
3. Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
4. For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
5. Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
6. Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
7. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir practice.
8. Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
9. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
10. The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
11. This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
12. Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. Is done.
13. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church Please use large double door at the side entrance.
I recently stumbled on this great site that offers unique gifts and gadgets and since Christmas is NEXT WEEK (ACK!!), I thought this would be a fun, interesting and timely Thursday Thirteen.
Liz Revision had a broken dance gaming pad from Dance Dance Revolution and didn’t know what to do with it. So she cut the top vinyl layer off, separating it from the electronics and then went to work refashioning it as a really cool ladies handbag.
Cast Oven is a microwave oven design that gives you a little bit of entertainment while your food cooks up. Instead of clear window, there’s an LCD screen. When you punch in the amount of time to cook the food, the microwave connects to the internet and streams a video clip from YouTube of the exact same length.
Kids love stealing the remote and putting on whatever show they want to. With the iMote Kid Friendly Remote Control parents can take back some of that control. This programmable remote control lets parents enter in their kid’s five favorite channels. With hundreds of channels available today, it’s hard for kids to remember a bunch of three digit numbers to know where their favorites are- make it easy for them. 100 colorful stickers for popular channels are included to label the buttons.
(From Craziest Gadgets:)
The designers of this keyboard concept have claimed the design is for you to bring your own keyboard along to avoid infections when using other computers. While that’s a noble pursuit (and possibly overkill- just bring a wipe to swipe down the keyboard instead), the result is a great conceptual design for a keyboard that folds up like a fan. Unlike say a silicon roll-up keyboard, this one maintains the rigidity you’re used to for typing. Good idea, I can definitely see it being produced.
More really valuable tips from this site. Number 13 is especially important to WriMos.
Thirteen Tips on How to Write a Really Bad Novel – Part Two
1. Nothing beats a catch phrase! I call Snoogity Bottom.
2. Brothers are always very different and they always argue about everything. Never portray brothers who are similar and get along unless they are twins (except if one is an evil twin). If they are twins they must finish each other’s sentences and no one should be able to tell them apart.
3. Sisters must always steal each other’s boyfriends. Additionally, one sister must be outgoing and the other must be quiet and serious. This makes no difference to the boyfriend though, he’ll gladly dump either for the other.
4. Don’t start your novel with an interesting event. Take a few dozen pages to explain everything that would lead up to that interesting event. The reader will gladly hang around until you get to the point.
5. Don’t make your secondary characters interesting. It will just detract from the main characters. Lesser characters don’t need reasons for their actions. They are just there to keep the plot moving.
6. If the plot seems to slow down, give someone a gun or a knife and kill off one of those secondary characters you don’t care about anyway.
7. If you want to write a serious novel, make sure the main character is jaded and has lost interest in life. This anti-hero must view all other people as phonies, fakes or idiots. The character should experiment with drugs and sex. At some point the character should watch someone die or at least be assaulted. At no point should the anti-hero feel any real pleasure. Happy endings are strictly prohibited.
8. Writing a mystery? Make sure the clues are really obvious or really obscure. Either way, your hero will be the only person who can piece these things together. At some point they must accuse the wrong person and be ridiculed for it. In the end though, they should deliver a speech that explains exactly how everything happened.
9. If you are writing about sports, make it clear that sports always provide important life lessons. Make sure the novel has one obsessive and one downtrodden coach.
10. Character conversations should always be used to explain what is happening and how people are feeling. It is perfectly natural to have a character explain to his office mate (whose brother is a bank president) that he used to be a safe cracker, but now he just wants to go straight.
11. Don’t forget to use italics when you want to emphasize something.
12. At the end of the book, you must have the main character reach an important and life-changing epiphany. Make that epiphany really obvious. Don’t worry about why they had one, just make sure they had it so the reader knows the book is ending.
13. Editing is just a waste of time. Spell check it and move on.
I happened to “stumble upon” this site and simply could not resist sharing these tips with you. Writers, are you paying attention?
Thirteen Tips on How to Write a Really Bad Novel – Part One
1. Make sure you’ve got a lot of similar names too. Donald, Donna, Dina, Dana and Danny just feel right together.
2. Explain everything. When your character is angry, just say that she’s angry. There’s no point in trying to show that through her actions when you can just tell that to your reader.
3. Remember that real writers use a typewriter. They don’t like these newfangled computers. A manual typewriter and a bucket of Wite-Out™ are the tools of a serious writer.
4. Fill your book with coincidences, especially towards the end. Nothing beats having the exciting climax occur because the hero bumped into the villain in a small-town cafe when they both had a craving for peach-filled semi-sweet chocolate pie. Did you mention that both characters love the exact same pie? Now would be a good time.
5. Don’t let your character’s established traits get in the way of a good plot twist. Just because your hero is a priest who preaches non-violence (We’ll call him Father Angeltoe) doesn’t mean he can’t be an expert marksman with an itchy trigger finger.
6. Use lots of technical jargon. Don’t worry about whether your reader will understand it, or whether you understand it. Just stick it in. It will make your characters sound smarter.
7. If you are writing a historical novel, don’t sweat accuracy. The reader won’t care. Go ahead and have Napoleon invent the automatic rifle. Who could say he didn’t?
8. If you are writing fantasy literature, make sure your magical animals have never been thought of before. Try a talking armadillo. No, forget the talking armadillo. I want that one for myself.
9. Make sure to add …A Novel to the end of your title. You don’t want people to forget what they are reading.
10. Pile on the adjectives and adverbs. Why have a woman speak when you can have her whisper breathlessly in her lustful, wind-swept voice?
11. Don’t feel as if anything has to happen. Plots are optional. Two people sitting in a room staring at each other is great material, as long as it is handled with plenty of adjectives and adverbs (see tip ten).
1. Earring – I don’t wear jewelery, unless I’m dressing up to go somewhere, but never day-to-day. In fact, I rarely even wear my wedding ring, much to my husband’s chagrin (he likes to say, when I do wear it, “Ah. I see you’re married today”). Jewelery bugs me. It gets in my way; I lose patience with it.
The biggest reason I don’t wear my wedding ring is because when I worked in the cash office at Wal-Mart, I caught it on something one night and just yanked the crap out of it. I totally freaked out, afraid the diamond had popped out and ever since then, I haven’t wanted to wear it for fear of losing one of the most important things to me.
(NOT the ring itself, but what it symbolizes, in case you think I’m THAT materialistic).
2. Earthworm – I am not a creature person. Ya’ll know I’m not an animal person, and when it comes to creepy-crawly things, I’m even worse. I never give a second thought to squashing a bug or smashing a spider – if I find them in the house.
You’re on my turf, man. Be gone bug.
3. Eavesdrop – I have a bad habit of listening in on people’s conversations. Kevin and I will go out to lunch and suddenly, I’ll stop talking and stare at my food. Kevin knows exactly what I’m doing and teases me about it.
I can’t help it, I LOVE to people watch. I LOVE to listen to people talk. And I love to either try and figure out the story behind the conversation or simply watch how people handle the conversation with facial expressions and body language.
I admit, it’s rude. But at least I’m discrete about it. It’s not like I’m sitting there, with my elbows on my knees, my chin in my hand and popping popcorn while I enjoy the show.
Though if it were interesting enough, I just might. *wink*
4. Economy – I’ve never really been THAT into politics. I could care less what was going on in the country when I was a teenager and I was too busy working, being romanced, getting married and having children in my twenties. I started paying more attention to the economy and our government in my 30’s and now that I’ve reached my 40’s, I’m very aware of our economy and how this asinine government in office right now has completely turned it inside out.
I’ll tell you one thing though, this new-found awareness has piqued the boys’ interest and they are well aware that they will be forced to pay for Obama’s attempt to socialize our nation when they reach my age.
Once again, THANK YOU Obama for screwing up my kids’ future earning potential. I’d go on, but this is a family-friendly blog.
5. Edit – I am constantly editing. If you had any idea how many times I’ve read and then re-read my posts, it would make your head spin around. I can’t help it, it’s the writer in me, I suppose.
THIS is why National Novel Writing Month is such a big deal to me – because turning off my inner editor is freaking HARD for me!
6. Education – Important. I was determined, through hell or high water, that I would graduate from college some day – and I did, after going on and off for 10 years in between having children, working and taking care of my family. I’m proud of my accomplishment; it was really hard to juggle all of those balls at the same time. I also wanted to set a good example for my boys, to SHOW them that it’s never too late to learn new things.
And I don’t think education should stop at school. I think it’s absolutely crucial for people to continue to educate themselves their entire lives. By learning a new craft, or challenging their brains, or staying on top of current events (and making sure he/she has enough information before offering an opinion).
There is so much to learn and so little time to learn it, let alone implement what you’ve learned.
7. Educational Television – Important. It sounds so boring, but once you begin watching educational television, you realize how INTERESTING it truly is. So much TV nowadays is just brainless nonsense. Again, the world is an amazing place – let’s learn more about it and skip the reality shows which only showcase humans at their very worse (most of them, anyway).
8. Efficient – I like to be efficient. I like to feel like I’m in control of every aspect of my life. I think, overall, this is a good trait to have. Life just goes more smoothly when things are run efficiently.
9. Egocentric – There is no question that I’m self-centered. I think this blog proves it (but one could argue, how can a personal journal be anything BUT egocentric). However, I feel like I have a good balance between what I want and what my family wants or needs from me. I never hesitate to put my husband or my children in front of myself. If that means sacrificing the last cookie, or putting their comfort ahead of my own, then so be it.
There’s a time to be self-centered and then there’s a time NOT to be self-centered. The trick is knowing WHEN.
I’m still working on that part.
10. Election – You can bet your bottom dollar that I can not wait for the 2010 and 2012 elections.
We need change.
Wait. Scratch that. We HAVE to have change. Let’s take our country back and get back to our country’s basic principles; the principles that make this country great to begin with:
Freedom
Liberty
Personal Responsibility
Willingness to work hard and be proud of our accomplishments (and not have it handed to us)
Free market
11. Electronic – There is no question that I’m an electronic junkie. I love all things electronic. In fact, my whole family does. I love using electronics, I love testing new electronics, I can’t imagine my life without electronics.
We’re so blessed to be living in such a great age!
12. Elegant – Though I like to think I’m pretty down-to-earth, I DO like elegance. I like eating out at fancy restaurants and FEELING elegant. I appreciate people who exude elegance and class both in their speech and their demeanor. I enjoy being around people who proudly carry themselves.
Most of the time.
But being around someone THAT elegant or THAT pretentious all the time would, and does, get old after a while.
There are other times I prefer just to sit around in my sweats and belch.
13. Emasculate – This is a pet peeve of mine. I can’t stand women who purposefully emasculate their men all in the name of feminism. The women who feel the need to prove to either themselves, or whomever, that they are stronger and better than their mates are generally weak, insecure and rarely happy in the end.
And if someone falls into that category and disagrees with my assessment, then I would like to add honesty and humility to that list, too.
Because if you’re honest, with me and with yourself, then you’ll know, deep down, that tearing someone down, making them feel inferior so you can feel superior, never ends well.
Ever.
There’s being a feminist and then there’s being a b*tch.
Thirteen “E” Words that Describe my Life
Scrolling through my life, one letter at a time.
1. Earring – I don’t wear jewelery, unless I’m dressing up to go somewhere, but never day-to-day. In fact, I rarely even wear my wedding ring, much to my husband’s chagrin (he likes to say, when I do wear it, “Ah. [...]
Karen said, on 10/30/2009 8:17:00 AM
I thought family members would get a kick out of seeing this:
This is Dude and Nanny (Kevin’s grandmother – who recently passed away). Dude is a little under a year in this picture and though he was okay wearing this costume in this picture, he melted down about 2.2 seconds after it was snapped.
My mom came up with this nifty idea. It’s a regular sleeper, but she made the clown embellishments. Pretty clever, right?
She’s a crafty one, my mom.
Looking at this picture, and looking at Dude’s profile picture in the sidebar, I don’t know, is this even the same kid?! It seems like he was NEVER this small.
*SIGH* Kids grow up waaaay too fast. Enjoy them while you can!
Because honestly? Ideas for stories ABOUND from real life. You just have to pay attention.
But never mind that – who has time to pay attention? Let me point you to some wacky real-life stories:
(Pst. Listen up National Novel Writing Month participants – I’m offering all sorts of bizarre story ideas here. Don’t say I didn’t try to help you come up with something! )
PARIS (Reuters) – A drunk French teenager narrowly escaped death on Sunday after falling asleep on a railway track and slumbering undisturbed as a high-speed train roared over him, police said.
LONDON (Reuters) – A group of schoolchildren who reared a lamb from birth and named it Marcus has overridden objections by parents and rights activists and voted to send the animal to slaughter.
INDIANAPOLIS – A woman who worked catering events for the University of Notre Dame says it was her lucky day when the school tipped her $29,000 in her check. But now the university is suing to get back the money she says she’s already spent.
WICHITA, Kan. – A tender moment in a trash bin went all wrong for a couple who found themselves being held up at pocket knifepoint. Police said two 44-year-olds had climbed into a dumpster to be alone just after 6 p.m. Saturday when two men interrupted them and demanded their belongings. Officers said the man and woman were engaged in “an intimate moment” when they were robbed of their shoes, jewelry and the man’s wallet.
CHICAGO (Reuters) – Executioners couldn’t find a suitable vein in which to inject drugs to kill a 53-year-old murderer, who then got a one-week reprieve from the governor so Ohio prison officials can figure out what to do.
ELIZABETHTON, Tenn. – A northeast Tennessee deputy sheriff who went to the wrong house came back with his man anyway. The incident occurred Friday evening when Carter County Sheriff’s Deputy Richard Barnett responded to a domestic disturbance call, but mistakenly knocked on the door of the wrong house.
ATHENS, Tenn. – An Athens man was accused of pointing a shotgun at visitors in his home in order to get them to leave. The man, 74 was charged with three counts of aggravated assault. He’s been released on $30,000 bond.
FOX LAKE, Ill. – A northern Illinois teacher faces felony charges after allegedly giving two teenage girls marijuana, alcohol and prescription drugs in exchange for work around her home. Kym Krocza was arrested Tuesday on charges of contributing to the delinquency of a minor. She is free on bond.
NEW YORK – All the big names came out for New York Fashion Week: Marc. Vera. Snuggie. Yes, Snuggie — the blanket with sleeves — staged a runway show on Tuesday, complete with high-fashion models and a new “urban jungle” line of zebra and leopard prints.
CRESTWOOD, Mo. – A 68-year-old man who still works at the first McDonald’s restaurant in Missouri has been honored for 50 years of service. Leonard Rhomberg began his job at a McDonald’s restaurant in the St. Louis suburb of Crestwood in 1959, the year after it opened. And he still works there five days a week.
KUALA LUMPUR (AFP) – A 107-year-old Malaysian woman says she is ready to marry for the 23rd time because she fears her current drug addict husband might leave her for a younger woman, a report said Monday.
MARSHFIELD, Wis. – Brian Johnsrud spat a thawed cricket 22 feet, 8 inches at the Central Wisconsin State Fair on Saturday. Minutes later, his son Jared shot his cricket 10 feet, 5 inches to win the 9-to-11 age division.
I adore these weird news stories because honestly, they are a writer’s dream – talk about strange and fascinating ideas – and they’re true!!
Which story did you find the most interesting/disturbing?
I’ll be writing a fictionalized account of one of the above stories very soon. Can you guess which one it’ll be?
Stay tuned …
Posted in Thursday Thirteen
3 Comments on Thursday Thirteen: Stranger Than Fiction, last added: 9/21/2009
(Whew! So much talk about death and hell. But don’t worry. I’ll be posting positive and uplifting lessons soon. This stuff is very important to understand, but it IS depressing. )
Every Sunday I provide videos and valuable links to the Truth or Tradition teachings. We’ve been following the Truth or Tradition teachings for [...]
Karen said, on 9/20/2009 8:37:00 AM
According to a news report, a certain school in Garden City, MI was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the washroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror, leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back.
Finally, the principal decided that something had to be done. He called all the girls to the washroom and met them there with the maintenance man. He explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, he asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.
The maintenance man took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
THE MORAL OF THIS STORY: There are teachers, and then there are Educators.
Thirteen Interesting “What If” Situations – How Would YOU Respond?
Please feel free to give your opinion on these situations even if you’re not playing Thursday Thirteen. There are no right or wrong answers here – it’s a question of scruples and what would you do?
You’re 50 years old, recently widowed and interested in dating. A long hard look in the mirror tells you that you look your age — the chin sags, the eyes droop and the brow wrinkles! A friend has recently had a face lift and looks great. Would you do it too?
My answer: First of all, define “recently widowed.” If Kevin passed away before I did, I am quite confident that it would take me a really, really, REALLY long time to EVER get to the place where I MIGHT want to date. I know, for a fact, I would never, nor will ever, remarry. Kevin is THE man for me. I can’t ever imagine wanting, or needing, another man in my life if he were to die.
However, with that said, and to be a good sport about this question, let’s assume that it’s been 30 years since Kevin passed away and I entertained the thought of going out with a guy. I would absolutely NOT have plastic surgery. Ever.
One reason is because I am who I am – flaws, wrinkles and all. I would never entertain the thought of surgically improving myself. I might gussy up and TRY and look nice and/or younger, but I would never go under the knife.
And secondly, I would never EVER have surgery for a man. If that man didn’t like me for me, then see ya.
Would you lie to your psychiatrist?
My answer: If I ever got to the point where I felt the need to go see a psychiatrist (and that’s a pretty big IF, as in colossal IF), then that means I’ve gotten to a pretty bad place in my life and mind. WHY would I go to the trouble of jumping through those mind-game hurdles only to lie when I reached the finish line? That seems counter-productive and not at all helpful. So no, I would not lie to my psychiatrist.
You are a photographer. A man hires you for his son’s wedding. He doesn’t ask your fee. You later discover that your client is very wealthy. Do you charge him more than your standard rate?
My answer: I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’d be tempted. But no, I wouldn’t charge him more simply because he can afford it. That would be taking advantage of the man and my conscience simply wouldn’t allow me to do that. (Did I mention I’d be tempted?)
I’d sure be urging him to tell all of his rich friends about me, though.
You discover that you were invited to your cousin’s wedding only because other guests canceled out. Do you still go?
My answer: Depends. I’m assuming this cousin and I aren’t close, otherwise, I’d be on the main invite list to begin with. I don’t know, maybe. I’m thinking I wouldn’t go, but I guess it would depend on what sort of family pressure I was getting for NOT going. Ugh. There’s that family drama again.
Your spouse attends a conference in Las Vegas. Later, you learn that your spouse’s attractive office colleague of the opposite sex also attended the convention. Do you grill your spouse about it?
My answer: Well duh. I’d not only grill him, I’d demand to see his conference notes just to prove that he was indeed IN the conference and not off gallivanting around the strip gambling our life savings away.
Actually, it would be more subtle than that. Wait …. scratch that. This scenario actually happened. It was back when Kevin was working in private accounting and wowsiers, he worked with some hot babes. And they went on conferences and it bothered me. Greatly. But I just had to learn to trust him and get over my insecurities in order to handle the times when it happened.
I still grilled him though.
You are getting married and you receive a present in the mail from your favorite uncle. He lives abroad and always sends one-of-a-kind gifts. When you open the present, it’s broken. Do you tell your uncle?
My answer: Ack! Tough one. On the one hand, it’s a one-of-a-kind gift so I would most likely treasure it. I’d be so sad that it arrived broken. But on the other hand, it came from abroad, which means it probably cost a butt-load of money to ship. And what if my uncle had to travel a long distance in order to buy this gift? I’d hate for him to feel like he had to make that trip again just because the one he sent me got broken. I’d feel too guilty. I’m going to say no, I probably wouldn’t tell him it arrived broken. (Unless he asked. But then again, maybe not?)
While working for your company, you discover a testing technique that could make you rich if you were self-employed. Would you leave the company with your “big idea” and risk possible legal action about rightful ownership of the technique?
My answer: I’d be tempted (that seems to be my answer of choice this go-around). But no, I wouldn’t do it for the very reason stated above: I don’t want to get sued and lose everything in a messy legal battle. However, I MIGHT take that idea to my boss and see what he/she says. Who knows? It could mean a big promotion for me and ultimately more money in the long run. You never know.
You’re on a first date with someone special at a very elegant restaurant with very intimidating waiters. Your filet mignon arrives overdone. Do you send it back to the kitchen?
My answer: The short answer, no. The long answer, no. I hate to cause waves. And I’ve worked in the food industry — you don’t want to piss your server off. You just don’t. You hear about food people spitting and doing other disgusting things to customers’ meals? Well guess what, it happens. Seriously. Be nice to your servers.
I wouldn’t want to cause waves anyway, let alone on a first date. Even if it was under done, I wouldn’t send it back. I realize this is kind of a wimpy answer, but I don’t know, I just hate causing scenes, I guess.
As a special treat, you want to take your 12-year old to an award-winning movie. It has some nudity in it, but the reviewers say, it’s “fun for all ages.” Do you take your child to the movie?
My answer: First of all, I don’t listen to reviewers. I never agree with them. Ever. So, that’s out. I’m assuming, since a 12-year old can get into it, that the nudity might be a butt or even a boob or two (though even that is hard for me to imagine — they would seriously allow the ratings on something “risque” to include 12-year olds? I would think the backlash would be severe), or in other words, mild.
Yes. I’d probably take my kid. Why? Because the body is beautiful and I think it’s important to treat situations like this like it’s no big deal. And we’d talk about it later, thereby opening a dialogue on a situation that might not have presented itself otherwise. I firmly believe the bigger deal parents make out of stuff, the more the kid wants to know what the fuss is all about.
You are at a black-tie affair. The socialite hostess compliments you on your gown and asks you where you bought it. You bought it second-hand at the local thrift shop. Would you tell her the truth?
My answer: Depends. If the socialite is someone I like, respect and feel comfortable with, yes. If the socialite is someone who intimidates me or who would hold the fact that I shop second-hand against me and/or that knowledge would diminish my overall value to her and I think she can perhaps help me out at some future point, then no, I wouldn’t tell her I bought it second-hand. But I wouldn’t make up a place that I bought it, either. I would simply pretend I couldn’t remember where I bought it and then quickly changed the subject.
Not exactly the most noble answer, but I’m trying to keep it real.
Your accountant can cover a $20,000 windfall you made by falsifying some business expenses on your tax return. Do you agree to the “creative accounting?”
My answer: Isn’t that what got us into this stupid stimulus mess to begin with: creative accounting?? I’d be tempted, because who wants to own up to a $20,000 mistake, but no, I would tell my accountant to leave the creative part out of his accounting practice, please.
Your current lover asks you how many sex partners you’ve had in the past. Do you tell the truth?
My answer: Depends. If I’m going to be honest with him, then I need to be prepared to hear his honest answer as well. Why lie? Be honest, and if your lover can’t handle it, you’re better off in the long run.
(And yes, Kevin and I have had this conversation. It was awkward, but also a little amusing, if you want the God’s honest truth).
Your next door neighbor is collecting for a charity in which you have no particular interest. Do you contribute?
My answer: Depends. (I say that a lot, don’t I). If I had the money, and I was okay with the charity, then probably. However, if I didn’t agree with the philosophy behind the charity, or I thought the charity was a scam, then no, probably not.
____________________
Your turn. Pick one (or more) of the above scenarios and tell me what you would do. I’m curious.
More from Write From Karen
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Posted in Thursday Thirteen
0 Comments on Thursday Thirteen: What If #4 as of 8/13/2009 4:08:00 PM
Some of my favorite Post Secrets. I’m posting these because they resonate with me on some level. What’s your favorite secret?
1.
Get out of debt- it solves so many problems.
2.
What would YOURS say?
3.
Who hasn’t?
4.
But then that day comes and we wish for our old life back.
5.
And that, my friends, is something my boys will never say about my mothering skills. If anything, I’ve prepared them a little TOO much.
6.
I’m mellowing in my old age. Now, instead of getting annoyed, I get amused … and a little sad, quite frankly.
7.
This one breaks my heart … for a variety of reasons.
8.
If you think that, then it’s likely you never will. Perhaps it’s time to stop thinking your dad is the perfect man.
9.
This one also makes me sad. If the bride/groom is thinking this on their wedding day, then what sort of marriage will this be?
10.
Amen. You know who you are.
11.
Just another example of where it behooves us to follow rules. Pilots and flight attendants are human, too. AND they have our lives in their hands – ’nuff said.
12.
Being young = being stupid. However, it doesn’t HAVE to be that way.
13.
Indeed, I’ve been asking myself this question for years.
I did not write these tips. These tips, and many more like these, can be found at Common Errors in English. So, if you disagree with these rules, then please, don’t kill the messenger. These are here just for your learning/entertainment, nothing more, and nothing less.
Now that you know my disclaimer, let’s move on to the juicy stuff … *rubs hands together in glee* …
1. AS SUCH: The expression “as such” has to refer to some status mentioned earlier. “The CEO was a former drill sergeant, and as such expected everyone to obey his orders instantly.” In this case “such” refers back to “former drill sergeant.” But often people only imply that which is referred to, as in “The CEO had a high opinion of himself and as such expected everyone to obey his orders instantly.” Here the “such” cannot logically refer back to “opinion.” Replace “as such” with “therefore.”
2. ASSURE/ENSURE/INSURE: To “assure” a person of something is to make him or her confident of it. According to Associated Press style, to “ensure” that something happens is to make certain that it does, and to “insure” is to issue an insurance policy. Other authorities, however, consider “ensure” and “insure” interchangeable. To please conservatives, make the distinction. However, it is worth noting that in older usage these spellings were not clearly distinguished.
3. ASTROLOGY/ASTRONOMY: Modern astronomers consider astrology an outdated superstition. You’ll embarrass yourself if you use the term “astrology” to label the scientific study of the cosmos. In writing about history, however, you may have occasion to note that ancient astrologers, whose main goal was to peer into the future, incidentally did some sound astronomy as they studied the positions and movements of celestial objects.
4. ATM MACHINE: “ATM” means “Automated Teller Machine,” so if you say “ATM machine” you are really saying, “Automated Teller Machine machine.”
5. ATTAIN/OBTAIN: “Attain” means “reach” and “obtain” means “get.” You attain a mountaintop, but obtain a rare baseball card. “Attain” usually implies a required amount of labor or difficulty; nothing is necessarily implied about the difficulty of obtaining that card. Maybe you just found it in your brother’s dresser drawer.
Some things you obtain can also be attained. If you want to emphasize how hard you worked in college, you might say you attained your degree; but if you want to emphasize that you have a valid degree that qualifies you for a certain job, you might say you obtained it. If you just bought it from a diploma mill for fifty bucks, you definitely only obtained it. (HAHA!)
6. AVENGE/REVENGE: When you try to get vengeance for people who’ve been wronged, you want to avenge them. You can also avenge a wrong itself: “He avenged the murder by taking vengeance on the killer.” Substituting “revenge” for “avenge” in such contexts is very common, but frowned on by some people. They feel that if you seek revenge in the pursuit of justice you want to avenge wrongs: not revenge them.
7. AWAY/A WAY: “Jessica commented on my haircut in a way that made me think maybe I shouldn’t have let my little sister do it for me.” In this sort of context, “a way” should always be two distinct words, though many people use the single word “away” instead. If you’re uncertain, try substituting another word for “way”: “in a manner that,” “in a style that.” If the result makes sense, you need the two-word phrase. Then you can tell Jessica to just go away. (HAHA, this guy’s funny!)
8. A WHILE/AWHILE: When “awhile” is spelled as a single word, it is an adverb meaning “for a time” (“stay awhile”); but when “while” is the object of a prepositional phrase, like “Lend me your monkey wrench for a while” the “while” must be separated from the “a.” (But if the preposition “for” were lacking in this sentence, “awhile” could be used in this way: “Lend me your monkey wrench awhile.”) (Clear as mud?)
9. BACKSLASH/SLASH: This is a slash: /. Because the top of it leans forward, it is sometimes called a “forward slash.”
This is a backslash: \. Notice the way it leans back, distinguishing it from the regular slash.
10. BALL/BAWL: To “bawl” is to cry out loudly, so when you break down in tears you bawl like a baby and when you reprimand people severely you bawl them out. Don’t use “ball” in these sorts of expressions. It has a number of meanings, but none of them have to do with shouting and wailing unless you’re shouting “play ball!”
11. BARE/BEAR: There are actually three words here. The simple one is the big growly creature (unless you prefer the Winnie-the-Pooh type). Hardly anyone past the age of ten gets that one wrong. The problem is the other two. Stevedores bear burdens on their backs and mothers bear children. Both mean “carry” (in the case of mothers, the meaning has been extended from carrying the child during pregnancy to actually giving birth). But strippers bare their bodies—sometimes bare-naked. The confusion between this latter verb and “bear” creates many unintentionally amusing sentences; so if you want to entertain your readers while convincing them that you are a dolt, by all means mix them up. “Bear with me,” the standard expression, is a request for forbearance or patience. “Bare with me” would be an invitation to undress. “Bare” has an adjectival form: “The pioneers stripped the forest bare.”
12. BARTER/HAGGLE: When you offer to trade your vintage jeans for a handwoven shirt in Guatemala, you are engaged in barter—no money is involved. One thing (or service) is traded for another.
But when you offer to buy that shirt for less money than the vendor is asking, you are engaged in haggling or bargaining, not bartering.
13. BESIDE/BESIDES: “Besides” can mean “in addition to” as in “besides the puppy chow, Spot scarfed up the filet mignon I was going to serve for dinner.” “Beside,” in contrast, usually means “next to.” “I sat beside Cheryl all evening, but she kept talking to Jerry instead.” Using “beside” for “besides,” won’t usually get you in trouble; but using “besides” when you mean “next to” will.
This is a sticky note. Please scroll down for current entries.
Ready? Set. Shoot!
This photo contest theme is: THEME: SUMMER / SWIMMING / VACATION / PARK / PICNIC / OUTDOOR ACTIVITIES / BBQ / FIREWORKS / WATER SPORTS
Post your picture beginning NOW to 4:00 central time July 18th.
Show us your favorite summer photograph! But wait, [...]
Thirteen sure fire ways to screw up your marriage from Happily Ever After. (You can find 20 MORE sure fire ways to screw up your marriage at Happily Ever After).
1. Your relationship with your children is more important than your relationship with your spouse.
2. You refuse to compromise. It’s your way or the divorce court.
3. You constantly brush off your spouse’s sexual advances because you are “not in the mood.” You do not look into ways to get yourself in the mood. Thus, you can’t remember the last time you had sex.
4. You let yourself go. You no longer take steps to make yourself sexy and desirable for your spouse. Sometimes, you don’t even brush your teeth or bother to make sure you don’t have B.O.
5. You refuse to give your husband the “atta boy” for doing mundane things like emptying the dishwasher simply because he never gives you an “atta girl” for doing the same thing.
6. You never tell your wife that she’s sexy, beautiful or hot, simply because she never thanks you for emptying the dishwasher.
7. You only hug your wife or grab her rear when you want to get busy. You never do it just to make her feel good.
8. You belittle your spouse in front of other people.
9. You refuse to give your spouse a second chance. You hold every single indiscretion against him for eternity, no matter how many times he’s said, “I’m sorry” and no matter how successfully he’s changed his behavior.
10. You only practice random acts of kindness with strangers. You don’t do it for your spouse.
11. You can’t bring yourself to say, “I’m sorry” even though you know you were wrong.
12. You make fights with your spouse about “who is right” rather than about “how can we fix this.”
13. You don’t take turns reaching each other’s dreams. You think your spouse is there to support you and not the other way around.
Beginning Sunday, May 17th, I’d like to post the first 10 challenges (one challenge a day for 10 days) from the Love Dare book for you to sample and even try, if you’re brave enough (why yes, that IS a challenge!!).
And I’d like to giveaway one (possibly two, depending on demand) Love Dare book and one Fireproof DVD in the process.
All you have to do is comment on the current day’s challenge. That’s it. And if you actually TRY it, then your comment will be worth two tickets instead of one.
I’m doing this because I truly believe in the message behind the challenge and the movie. It’s time we shifted our focus, renewed our minds and worked toward healing our marriages – not ending them.
I hope you’ll consider joining me. I too will be trying these challenges out on my husband and I’ll let you know my results.
Posted in Thursday Thirteen
4 Comments on Thursday Thirteen – Marriage Pitfalls, last added: 5/15/2009
Thirteen sure fire ways to screw up your marriage from Happily Ever After. (You can find 20 MORE sure fire ways to screw up your marriage at Happily Ever After).
1. Your relationship with your children is more important than your relationship with your spouse.
2. You refuse to compromise. It’s your way or the divorce [...]
Karen said, on 5/14/2009 7:00:00 AM
This video carnival, aptly named Vlogemotions (get it? Video + blog + emotions = Vlogemotions) focuses on one specific emotion per week and is brought to you by Fort Thompson.
Here is my emotional contribution for the week:
Update: Twelve and 1/2 days until school ends! W00t!
The orthodontist said … four more weeks!
This is like the FIFTH time they’ve pushed him back!! Take those damn braces off already!
Aargh!!!!!!
Posted in VideoPlay
Karen said, on 5/15/2009 4:44:00 AM
Oh look! Another wonderful excuse to scan old pictures and bore you to tears!! Yay!
Angie, this one’s for you.
My brother, ya’ll. Back in the day when he THOUGHT he was tough.
hehe
Posted in Photo Story Friday
Karen said, on 5/15/2009 9:18:00 AM
Wow, last night was incredible.
Nothing spectacular happened really, but it was more the atmosphere – the level of excitement and anticipation was almost palpable.
We attended the high school band’s parent meeting last night. We arrived a little early, stepped into the gym and was nearly knocked over by a huge bubble of expectation. [...]
So often, we concentrate on the things that we don’t like about ourselves. I think it’s time to focus on the positive, don’t you?
1. I like my … eyes. I think they are a pretty color. (Amber, with a splash of poo. *grin*)
2. I like my … legs. I do a lot of walking and they are pretty toned.
3. I like my … sense of humor. I have a tendency to find the little things funny. (Even when it’s inappropriate - oops, that’s negative!)
4. I like my … life. It’s well rounded, full, rich and I’m very happy.
5. I like my … car. It’s an ‘08 Vibe and drives like a go-cart.
6. I like my … hobbies. I have a love/hate relationship with writing and I love (perhaps too much) the Internet.
7. I like my … new walking sneakers. I wore out my old ones and I purposefully bought a funky-looking pair. (Note the lime green piping - when have I EVER wore lime green anything?!)
(Ignore the hairy legs. Er, leg.).
8. I like my … boobs. I know, sorry. But they are a nice size and aren’t too terribly droopy - yet. Updated: They drooped. Never mind.
9. I like my … sense of fairness. I’m strict, but I’m also fair. Just ask my children.
10. I like my … guys. Well actually, I LOVE my guys. Okay fine, I like my guys A WHOLE LOT.
(Okay, I’m starting to search for things … bear with me).
11. I like my … wrinkles. Really, what choice do I have?
12. I like my … feet. Ugh, no I don’t. Scratch that one.
Thirteen things I like about myself.
So often, we concentrate on the things that we don’t like about ourselves. I think it’s time to focus on the positive, don’t you?
1. I like my … eyes. I think they are a pretty color. (Amber, with a splash of poo. *grin*)
2. I like my … [...]
Karen said, on 4/9/2009 11:01:00 AM
Congratulations Dianne F.!!
THANK YOU to everyone who visited and commented! We’ll do this again in July!
Keep Reading!!
IT’S TIME!
Yep, it’s that time once again - time to give a book away for no good reason!
So how does this work, you ask? Here’s the short version, I’m participating in the program and would love to buy [...]
Karen said, on 4/9/2009 5:11:00 PM
I’m embarrassed to admit this, but I’ve never really experienced grief. I’ve been very, very fortunate - no one close to me has died.
Yet.
So when I read about other bloggers who lose their babies suddenly, and without reason, I’m not sure what to say. I can’t imagine the terrible grief Heather and Mike Spohr [...]
Karen said, on 4/12/2009 1:00:00 PM
Need something to blog about tomorrow? Look no further. Take these questions, write a post, make it unique and fun, then come back Monday and leave your link.
Comments are turned off on purpose. Why? Because it’s not Monday yet.
1. How long have you been blogging? Who is your target audience? How often, if at all, do you think about quitting or taking an extended break? What do you do when you start feeling burned out with blogging?
2. What’s on your mind now?
3. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the body or the mind of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? Explain your answer, please.
4. What would you constitute a “perfect” evening for you?
“What did you do in school today?” elicits complete silence or the popular refrains, “I don’t know” and “I don’t remember.”
You are the “only mommy” who did not pack a lunch dessert for your child. Apparently, strawberries don’t qualify as dessert, especially not if your child cannot open the Ziplock baggie in which they were stored.
Your child must have a backpack even though they don’t have books or papers to carry back and forth on a daily basis. Carrying an empty backpack is completely normal and necessary.
The details you do learn of your child’s day are superfluous: “My teacher wears high heels!”
Smiling while looking at the camera is an endeavor more difficult than the decathalon.
Stopping to chat with other mothers for only a minute or two turns into over an hour and you wonder if you will soon be referred to as a yenta.
Even though your child concedes that the Dora the Explorer pillow you provided for naptime is not actually alive, Dora still managed to grab and pull your child’s hair with malicious intent.
Your child whines of hunger the second you pick them up. Refer to #2 above.
Once greeted by six hours of free time (even though that free time is spent with a 10 month-old baby) you should not start promising owners of Gymboree franchises that you will teach infant classes three days a week.
Do not provide your child with the coolest new underwear from the most popular new Disney movie if you do not want her lifting her dress every five minutes to show her classmates.
You can get up at 6:30am without being a zombie—just go to bed at 6:30pm.
If you send your child to school in sandals, they will return home with black feet.
Never before have six hours gone by so slowly…and yet so quickly.
8 Comments on Thursday Thirteen: Things Parents Learn on the First Day of Preschool, last added: 4/6/2009
My two and a half year old daughter started preschool last week and these are so true! Very amusing.
Sherrie said, on 3/12/2009 11:01:00 AM
Great list! My six-year-old still likes showing off her underwear. I’m starting to get worried…
Christy said, on 3/12/2009 11:31:00 AM
LOL! Great list! :0)
Christy
Corey said, on 3/12/2009 12:50:00 PM
My kids crack me up when I ask “What did you do in school today?” My four year old says something like “Today we were paleontologists and we dug for dinosaur fossils,”and my three year old says the same thing every day…”We relaxed a little.” Ha!
Tara L :) said, on 3/13/2009 9:34:00 AM
From one Tara L to another, you rock:) & Thursday Thirteen is a GREAT idea.
My fave is #11…sleep is so overrated:)
Katherine Battersby said, on 3/13/2009 7:58:00 PM
Oh no - the underwear! I’m in stitches! I have a vague memory of when I was little having other little girls doing that. Not me - I was a tomboy, and you couldn’t get me in a dress
Natisha LaPierre said, on 3/15/2009 2:34:00 AM
Little boys do the same thing if they are in cool new underwear. Loved the list!
Batya said, on 3/15/2009 2:10:00 PM
LOL at #3. I never understood carrying the empty back pack back and forth everyday. Sounds like you are doing great!! xoxo, Batya
Monday, May 26th, marks our 18th wedding anniversary. This is a recap of the first time we met.
1. It all began in September, 1987.
2. I was no longer interested in being a fast-food manager. I began work at a bank and was terrified I wasn’t smart enough to handle the job.
3. But then I met my husband - he was a drive-thru teller and was only too happy to show me the ropes. I quickly learned my duties, I also quickly learned that I had a huge crush on this smart, handsome, witty man.
4. Who was newly divorced by only six months. I was scared to get involved with him, who wants to be a rebound girl?
5. I fought the attraction and fooled myself into thinking we could “just be friends.”
6. But then his ex-wife came through the drive-thru with another man and openly taunted him. A flood of emotions raced through me - anger, sadness (because I could see it bothered and embarrassed him), protectiveness, and yes, love.
7. But still, I kept it cool and maintained my distance. Soon, our flirtations caught our co-workers’ attention.
8. They began to tease us. They began to try and set us up, but I resisted because I was scared of getting hurt.
9. I felt guilty for flirting with him - he worked with a woman who OBVIOUSLY had feelings for him. She ended up hating my guts. I’m sorry to say, I didn’t care; I allowed myself to get closer to him.
10. He suggested we hang out after work. I declined. I was stubborn and oh so cautious. I had been hurt once before, my heart couldn’t take another wound.
11. The company Christmas party arrived and he made me a bet - if he balanced to the penny, then I had to go to the party with him. Figuring I was safe because he never balanced to the penny, I agreed. He balanced.
12. I refused to go to the party with him, so we met at the hotel and walked into the party together. The only thing I remember about that night was him. We only had eyes for each other. After dinner, we all reconvened in the hotel bar for drinks. We sat in lounge chairs and spent several hours joking around with each other and getting increasingly intoxicated. That night solidified our feelings for each other.
13. We left the party together. Shortly thereafter, he moved in with me and two years after that, we got married.
*Bonus: 14. I later learned he lied about the balancing to the penny part. I didn’t mind.
Thank you for the best 20 years of my life, honey; I love you.
5 Comments on Thursday Thirteen - Our Beginning, last added: 5/22/2008
What a sweet TT, you really are blessed. Happy anniversary!
Jessica The Rock Chick said, on 5/22/2008 8:17:00 AM
Congratulations!!! I think it’s cute that he didn’t balance to the penny and lied about it.
The hubby and I just celebrated our 16th last week and every year it just gets better! This was a beautiful post and it totally reminded my of how blessed I am.
Happy Anniversary and TT!
Jessica The Rock Chick
Mocha Mom said, on 5/22/2008 9:09:00 AM
I met my husband in 1988 (my TT is up, all songs from the year we met). We married as soon as we turned of age. We have been married 15 1/2 years now. I loved your list, makes me think even more about the early years with my hubby. Congrats to you both!!
1. 2 Bring Corpse to Store to Cash Check
NEW YORK (AP) — Two men wheeled a dead man through the streets in an office chair to a check-cashing store and tried to cash his Social Security check before being arrested on fraud charges, police said….
2. Swedes to Use Body Heat to Warm Offices
STOCKHOLM, Sweden (AP) — A Swedish company plans to harness the body heat generated by thousands of commuters scrambling to catch their trains at Stockholm’s main railway station and use it for heating a nearby office building….
3. Officer Gets Big Surprise After Escort
YORK, Maine (AP) — A police officer agreed to escort a car containing a pregnant woman to the hospital only to find the car was stolen - and the woman wasn’t pregnant….
4. Man Using Torch Sets His House on Fire
LIMA, Ohio (AP) — A man using a propane torch to thaw a frozen water pipe inadvertently set fire to his house Monday, authorities said. John Miller Sr. was working with the propane torch in a crawl space when a wall caught fire, filling the house with smoke, said Shawnee Township Fire Chief Tim Mosher….
5. Missing NY Rev. Found at Ohio Strip Club
RIVERSIDE, Ohio (AP) — Police say a pastor who was reported missing from his home in western New York has been found at an Ohio strip club….
6. Drunken Man Awakes Inside Garbage Truck
MUNCIE, Ind. (AP) — William M. Bowen woke up after a night of drinking with friends and realized he was inside a commercial trash-collection truck full of waste….
9. Illinois Lawmaker Robbed of $7
EAST ST. LOUIS, Ill. (AP) — A 77-year-old Illinois state representative is happy to be alive after a man with a gun pushed his way into her home and robbed her of $7….
10. Steven Seagull Returns to Motel for Cake
DULUTH, Minn. (AP) — Steven Seagull has returned to the Super 8 motel here, looking for his customary cake doughnut. Year after year, the ring-billed gull has tapped at the lobby’s front door until a staff member gives him the doughnut, said general manager Jodi Chambers….
11. Cook Accused of Spitting on Fan’s Burger
PORT ORCHARD, Wash. (AP) — A fast-food cook and Seattle Seahawks fan has been accused of spitting on a hamburger ordered by a man wearing Pittsburgh Steelers attire….
12. Woman, 77, Saves Mail Carrier From Dog
HIGHLAND, Ind. (AP) — A 77-year-old woman used her car to drive off a large dog that was attacking a mail carrier, saving the woman from more bite wounds….
13. Man Writes Check on 2-Ply Toilet Paper
BINGHAMTON, N.Y. (AP) — A man disputing his water bill is not being allowed to pay with a check written on toilet paper. Ron Borgna, who is disputing the $2,509.66 bill, wrote a check on floral print, two-ply toilet paper Wednesday….
Which news story did you find the strangest or most disturbing?
What’s special about YOUR mom. What’s special about BEING a mom? Write a 250 word essay and enter for a chance to win one of SIX prizes! Find out more information here.
5 Comments on Thursday Thirteen - Stranger Than Fiction #19, last added: 5/8/2008
That’s a great list, and a fun way to learn more about you! Happy T-13!
Alana said, on 3/20/2008 7:37:00 AM
Great list - love the look of your blog!
Adelle Laudan said, on 3/20/2008 7:57:00 AM
Great idea for a list. Happy T13!
colleen said, on 3/20/2008 8:17:00 AM
I read them: flip up: your vehicle vibe: your hair without reading the first question. They read pretty funny that way. It helped that I didn’t know what a flip-up and vibe were.
Savvyprchick said, on 3/20/2008 8:29:00 AM
Great list… I may have to steal it one day if you don’t mind!
1. deliquesce • \del-ih-KWESS\ • verb
*1 : to dissolve or melt away
2 : to become soft or liquid with age or maturity — used of some fungal structures (as the gills of a mushroom)
Example Sentence:
Someone forgot to put the butter back in the refrigerator, instead leaving it to deliquesce on the kitchen counter.
2. scaramouch • \skair-uh-MOOSH\ • noun
1 capitalized : a stock character in the Italian commedia dell’arte that burlesques the Spanish don and is characterized by boastfulness and cowardliness
2 a : a cowardly buffoon *b : rascal, scamp
Example Sentence:
My great uncle was an untrustworthy old scaramouch.
3. inspissate • \in-SPISS-ayt\ • verb
: to make thick or thicker
Example Sentence:
“Letting citizens sue polluters … would only inspissate the logjam of litigation.” (The New York Times, August 5, 1985)
4. phalanx • \FAY-lanks\ • noun
1 : a body of heavily armed infantry in ancient Greece formed in close deep ranks and files; broadly : a body of troops in close array
2 plural phalanges : one of the digital bones of the hand or foot of a vertebrate
*3 a : a massed arrangement of persons, animals, or things b : an organized body of persons
Example Sentence:
The police commissioner had to maneuver through a phalanx of reporters before he could make his way into the building
5. erudite • \AIR-uh-dyte\ • adjective
: possessing or displaying extensive knowledge acquired chiefly from books : learned
Example Sentence:
The university hosted an informative lecture given by an erudite scholar of Cold War history.
6. peripatetic • \pair-uh-puh-TET-ik\ • adjective
1 capitalized : Aristotelian
2 a : of, relating to, or given to walking *b : moving or traveling from place to place : itinerant
Example Sentence:
Rodney was a peripatetic journalist for several years until he bought a house and started writing for the local paper.
7. phishing • \FISH-ing\ • noun (I actually knew this one. But there might be some people out there that don’t know about this scam).
: a scam by which an e-mail user is duped into revealing personal or confidential information which the scammer can use illicitly
Example Sentence:
The widespread use of electronic banking and financial transactions has prompted the FTC to crack down on cyber crimes, such as phishing.
8. virescent • \vuh-RESS-unt\ • adjective
*1 : beginning to be green : greenish
2 : developing or displaying the condition of becoming green due to the development of chloroplasts in plant organs (as petals) normally white or colored
Example Sentence:
Buds formed on the bare trees, infusing the stark branches with a slight virescent tint.
9. crambo • \KRAM-boh\ • noun
: a game in which one player gives a word or line of verse to be matched in rhyme by other players
Example Sentence:
According to his early letters, James Boswell, friend and biographer of English lexicographer Samuel Johnson, was a keen crambo player.
10. objet trouvé • \AWB-zhay-troo-VAY\ • noun
: a natural or discarded object found by chance and held to have aesthetic value
Example Sentence:
The museum’s latest show, which features objets trouvés, is a dramatic change from last year’s exhibition of medieval religious art.
11. tyro • \TYE-roh\ • noun
: a beginner in learning : novice
Example Sentence:
A reviewer described the new photography manual as “a clear explanation of the basics, ideal for tyros but too elementary for seasoned shutterbugs.”
12. quiescent • \kwy-ESS-unt\ • adjective
*1 : marked by inactivity or repose : tranquilly at rest
2 : causing no trouble or symptoms
Example Sentence:
The storm was over, and the quiescent waters betrayed no sign of yesterday’s turbulence.
13. transpontine • \trans-PAHN-tyne\ • adjective
*1 : situated on the farther side of a bridge
2 British : situated on the south side of the Thames
Example Sentence:
Bella recommended a transpontine restaurant for our evening rendezvous, so we took a cab across the East River from our hotel in Manhattan and met her in Queens.
One of my 2008 goals is to write more fiction, both here on this blog and submitting to literary magazines/contests/publishers.
In order to achieve this goal, I need to practice. So, I’ve dubbed Thursdays as my Thursday Thread day. This, in essence, means that I will post excerpts from one story every month. I plan on developing three (possibly more) main characters and putting them into different situations once every month. The reader will then follow these characters, in this one situation, all month long. When a new month starts, a new situation will begin.
But just posting fiction is rather boring for readers sometimes. So, at the end of each excerpt, I will post a poll with different directions that the story could take. The reader will then vote for his/her favorite scenario and I will direct the story down the most popular option. This will allow me the practice I need to write on a regular basis, and get the readers involved in the story (I hope).
To find out more about the main characters and for links to past story excerpts, please visit this page.
The January scenario is: Family Reunion.
Brooke receives an invitation to a family gathering. She does NOT want to go and dreads running into a certain family member.
______________________________________
Family Reunion - Part One
“Swell, just swell.” Brooke Sanders stood just outside her apartment and frowned down at the embossed piece of paper in her hand.
“What’s up, Brooke?” Melissa Dunn, commonly referred to as Minnie, leaned against the wall, one leg lifted up, her torso twisted, her balance precarious as she struggled to put on her running shoe.
“This.” Brooke snapped the paper up for Melissa to look at.
“Uh, yeah. It’s a piece of paper, so what?” She grunted and snorted as she tried to fit her shoe over her foot.
Brooke lifted an eyebrow as she watched her best friend, and roommate, of three years, fight with her footwear. “Have you considered loosening the ties before putting that thing on?”
“Ha, ha. Aren’t you a comedy this morning.” With one last grunt, she successfully stepped into the shoe. “And stop changing the subject. What’s up with the paper?” She laughed up at Brooke before straightening from the wall. “You should see your face. I haven’t seen that particular look of disgust since the last time you tried sushi.”
Brooke grimaced. “This is far worse than slimy fish.” She gathered up the rest of their mail and stepped into the foyer. A gust of wind rushed the door shut behind her, slamming her in the rear end. “Ow!”
Melissa chuckled and made a grab for the paper.
“Uh, I don’t think so, girlfriend,” Brooke said as she deftly moved it out of her reach. “This piece of trash is going right where it belongs.” She neatly tucked the cardboard back into the envelope and dropped it into the small waste basket by the receiving table.
“Oh come on, you’re not even going to let me see what it is?”
“Nope.”
Melissa studied her for long moments. “You’re really upset by this, aren’t you.”
“Nope.”
“Liar.”
Brooke grabbed her running jacket and lifted it above her head.
Melissa took advantage of Brooke’s distraction to quickly retrieve the envelope and stick it into the pocket of her own running jacket.
“Let’s get out of here before we get out of the mood,” said Brooke.
“What, are you kidding me? I’m never in the mood to run.”
Brooke laughed and pulling a stocking cap on over her long, straight charcoal-colored hair; she opened the door. “Yeah. If it wasn’t for me, you’d be 300 pounds. So quit your belly achin’ and let’s get this over with.”
Brooke could hear Melissa grumbling behind her and smiled. She loved her friend dearly, but if there was one thing that bugged her to death about her, it was the fact that she was unmotivated and lazy. It was a good thing her parents were well off and supported her or there would be no telling what sort of person she would have ended up like.
“Holy freaking cow, it’s cold this morning,” Melissa gasped.
“Welcome to October.”
The girls spent a few seconds warming up before they took off at a leisurely pace down Dry Bridge road. After two full minutes of a slow steady jog, Brooke picked up the pace, confident that Melissa would adjust her own speed.
Thirty minutes later, the girls stopped to catch their breath in the city park.
“I” Melissa began, panting like a dog, “don’t … know … why I … let you talk … me into this … .” She bent forward at the waist and grabbed her knees.
Brooke lifted an arm, stuck two fingers to the pulse in her neck and waited six seconds before responding. “Because you would feel left out and we both know how much you hate that.”
“True,” Melissa slowly straightened and took several deep breaths. “Even though I hate doing this, I have to admit, I’m not as winded as I used to be.”
“And you’re looking pretty hot,” Brooke said with a grin.
“Well, there’s that.” Melissa laughed and stuck her hands in her pockets.
“I wonder if the Bassett Hound guy will show up today.”
“And exactly why are you wondering that?” Melissa asked.
Brooke shrugged. “Just making conversation.”
“Making conversation my ass, you like the guy.”
“I don’t even know the guy.”
“Okay, you think he’s hot and would LIKE to get to know the guy.”
Again, Brooke shrugged and tugged the cap down further onto her head.
“I’m not into guys.”
Melissa’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline. “Oh? Is there something I should know?”
Brooke’s cheeks began to grow warm and she scowled to cover her embarrassment. “Of course not. Get your mind out of the gutter.”
“Hey, you started it.”
“I just meant,” she sighed and looked out over the park, “I don’t have time for a man in my life right now.”
“Honey, there’s always time for men.”
Brooke chuckled and lightly punched her friend in the arm. “You would say that, you slut.”
Melissa shrugged and grinned. “I can’t argue with that. But seriously, you need someone, Brooke.”
“No I don’t. I’m doing just fine, thank you very much.”
“Okay, maybe not a steady boyfriend, but when is the last time you went out on a date?”
Brooke paused. Good question. When was the last time she had gone out with someone? Too long. Way too long. “Leave me alone. I’m trying to get my magazine up and running.”
“Ah yes, The Loophole.”
“Please don’t say it like that.”
Melissa shrugged. “I think you’re biting off more than you can chew, kiddo.”
“I know your thoughts on this project,” Brooke said, her voice tight and strained.
Melissa held up her hands. “Okay, uncle. We’ll drop the magazine issue, however,” she pulled the envelope Brooke had thrown away earlier from her pocket, “we need to discuss this.”
Brooke threw her hands up in the air. “You get on my nerves, do you know that?”
“I know and I don’t care if you’re mad at me. You need to go to your family reunion, Brooke.”
She tucked her hands under her arms and scowled. “You don’t know my family.”
“At least you have one,” Melissa returned, her voice quiet and quite sad.
Brooke continued to stare at her best friend. “I have issues with my family, Minnie.”
“Who doesn’t?”
“I mean real issues.”
“Brooke,” Melissa tucked the invitation back into her pocket and moved forward, placing a hand on her friend’s arm, “family is important. Whatever issues you have, you shouldn’t allow them to get in the way of getting to know your family. If you continue to avoid them, you’ll regret it, trust me.”
She sighed and patted her friend’s hand. “I’m sorry, Minnie. I know how you feel about the whole family dynamics and everything … but my family, well, they are quite crazy.”
“Is that why you don’t want to go to this reunion?”
“Well, partly,” Brooke bit her lip and then wished she hadn’t, they already felt stiff and chapped from the wind. “I … have no desire to see my brother.”
“You have a brother?” Melissa blinked rapidly. “Since when?”
“Since, forever. He’s five years older than me and the biggest prick you’ll ever meet.”
“I can’t believe I’ve known you for almost four years and you’ve never mentioned having a brother.”
“I try to forget him.”
“What did he do?”
“It’s what he didn’t do.”
“I don’t understand.”
Brooke sighed. “I don’t expect you to.”
“So, you’re avoiding your family because of your brother. What about your parents? They’ll be hurt if you don’t go.”
“They could care less what I do.”
“I find that hard to believe. What about Lynn?”
Brooke sighed again and her shoulders lowered from her defensive stance. “Not fair.”
“And you think neglecting your baby sister is?” Melissa tilted her head and gave her friend a reproachful look. “You owe it to Lynn to go. And,” she raised her head and flashed a Cheshire cat grin, “I’ll go with you. That’s sure to liven things up a bit.”
Brooke smiled and gave a reluctant nod. “Fine. I’ll go. But I won’t be happy about it and I won’t have a good time.”
Well, another year is nearly gone. It seems the older we get, the faster the months simply drop off into the memory abyss.
This post is my way of resurrecting those memories, if only for a short time period. Please feel free to copy the code below and paste the Goodbye to 2007 button to your site. Please attribute writefromkaren.com.
You sure stayed busy this year. I hope that your New Year will continue to bless you in your writing! I have posted a link to your site on my blog. Happy TT.
Gattina said, on 12/27/2007 8:45:00 AM
Wow you did some exercise to learn how to make links, lol ! It is not so long ago that I learned it and it was in 2007 !
1. 4,000 Pounds of Pig Blood Spills on Road
KLAMATH FALLS, Ore. (AP) — A valve on a truck hauling animal waste from a Klamath Falls processing plant broke, spilling 4,000 pounds of pig blood. A biohazards cleaning company from Prineville was called in to clean up about 200 feet of roadway flooded by the blood….
2. Mom Makes Daughter Wear Her Offenses
MEMPHIS, Tennessee (AP) — A Tennessee mother fed up with her daughter’s misbehavior took an unusual tack in for latest punishment, making her stand on a busy street corner with an attention-getting sign….
3. Race Gives New Meaning to Beer Run
SUAMICO, Wis. (AP) — Only in Wisconsin do beer and exercise mix. Several hundred people laced up Sunday morning for a two-mile charity race in which suds were the refresher of choice. Competitors in the 19th annual Beer Belly Two might not be considered athletes, but they know how to have a good time….
4. Wife Blames Shooting on Burglar Alarm
PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. (AP) — A woman held on a gun charge claims she accidentally shot her husband in the head after becoming startled when the couple’s burglar alarm activated, authorities said Wednesday….
5. Man Gets 10 Years in License Shooting
REDDING, Calif. (AP) — A 49-year-old truck driver has been sentenced to 10 years in prison for shooting his wife after she failed to renew his driver’s license….
7. Inmates Cover Hole With Pancake Batter
SCOTT CITY, Missouri (AP) — Police said inmates used pancake batter and toothpaste to cover a hole they made to allow a female inmate to slide into the next cell and join a male inmate. Now steel plates are being added to the Missouri jail’s interior walls….
8. Woman Wrangles Gator Into Guinea Pig Pen
RESTON, Va. (AP) — She had seen it on TV plenty of times, so for Erin Kemp, wrangling a stray alligator that wandered into her yard was no big deal….
9. Man Beats Peacock He Says Was Vampire
NEW YORK (AP) — A peacock that roamed into a fast-food restaurant parking lot was attacked by man who vilified the bird as a vampire, animal-control authorities said….
10. Man Punches ‘Rude’ Drive-Thru Clerk
PENN HILLS, Pa. (AP) — A man who thought the clerk at a fast-food drive-through was rude for not saying “please” and “thank you” punched her in the face, police said. Duane L. Williams, angered by what he felt was the clerk’s rudeness, walked into the store to complain just before 8 p.m. Wednesday, Penn Hills police Chief Howard Burton said Friday….
11. Pair in Separate Vehicles Hit Same Deer
WINONA, Minn. (AP) — A couple driving home separately from Wisconsin each hit the same deer earlier this week. Winona County Sheriff’s Chief Deputy Ron Ganrude said the deer jumped out of the ditch about 4 p.m. Wednesday on a road near Nodine and rammed the left side of Bill MacAskill’s Acura….
12. Rider Banned Over Birth-Control Advice
LOGAN, Utah (AP) — A 76-year-old woman has been barred from the bus station after giving unwanted birth-control advice to mothers with large families. “I think it’s wrong. It’s a violation of my First Amendment rights,” Laura Stevens said….
I picked these questions up from commentors on Michele’s blog.
1. What is the sexiest part of the body to you?
The sexist part of my body … do you want the clean answer or the dirty answer.
Okay, the clean answer it is: probably my eyes. I like the color - sort of an amberish/poo color.
2. How long do you stay angry?
It depends on what I’m angry about. If it’s pretty serious? I never get over it - oh yes, I hold a grudge, a vicious grudge. If it’s pretty trivial? Then for about 30 minutes. I flare up easily, but I usually extinguish pretty fast, too.
3. What one word would someone use to describe your decorating style?
Hodgepodge.
What, that’s a style. *grin*
4. Have YOU ever been to vegas?
No. But the hubs has. I would love jet up there for the weekend, just him and me. Roll some dice, take some pictures, make fun gawk at the half-naked women.
5. What are your work hours?
I work from home. So really, any and all hours are considered my work hours. My work load comes in spurts and sometimes it depends on the time of year (for instance, the first of the school year is INSANE). This sounds like a good thing on the surface? But it can get old - fast. My job is like being on call 24/7.
6. What is your most frequent (not necessarily greatest) fear?
Losing control of a situation. I can’t tell you how many dreams I have, A NIGHT, where I’ve lost someone, my teeth fall out, or I’m trying to locate something. It’s creepy actually.
7. What would be a way for someone to show you just how much they love you?
Leave me a note somewhere unexpected. I really enjoy love notes (HINTHINT).
Or
Do something unexpected for me. I truly appreciate when people go out of their way for me. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
8. What was your favorite back-to-school item to buy?
Notebooks, hands down. I heart notebooks. Especially the funky, girly kinds.
9. Have you ever read anyone’s entire blog? Not counting those you know in person.
No, but I’ve gotten really close before. Actually, I would have finished but I ran out of time. I really enjoy blogs with a sense of humor and bloggers who have no problem laughing at themselves. Like this blogger, for instance.
11. Where is the farthest you’ve ever been from home?
Virgin Islands. We went on a cruise for our tenth anniversary. And we will MOST DEFINITELY be going on a cruise for our 20th (which is coming up in 2 1/2 years!! We better start saving up, honey!)
12. What was the last blog you commented on?
An Island Life. I love Kailani. Strictly in a blogger-to-blogger way, you understand. *grin*
13. Do you agree that paying for good grades will prove that rewards require hard work? Does it take away from the love of learning? Would you be willing to pay a child for getting good grades?
I think it depends on the child. For example: MK likes to learn. He’s truly interested in new things. And he asks a lot of questions, and you can tell the boy is absorbing the information he learns. And when he gets good grades, he’s proud, when he gets bad grades, he’s pretty bummed. I don’t really have to do anything to motivate him - he motivates himself.
Now GD, on the other hand, is a kid of a different DNA. He hates school with every fiber of his being. I think it mainly stems from the fact that he doesn’t like to listen to anyone or be forced to do something (takes after his mom actually). So yes, he requires motivation to keep his grades up. We have a system worked out now - he keeps his grades up, he retains unlimited video/computer time. His grades drop below a C, and his play time is reduced to three hours a day (which is the equivalent to death for this child), and if it drops to a D or an F, he loses ALL play time. This system has been working very well, so far. He’s a straight A/B student.
Do I have a problem with paying kids for good grades? Not at all. In my opinion, school IS their job at this point in their lives. It’s hard work. And they put in a LOT of time. Why shouldn’t they be paid for their hard work? Adults do.
Do I think it takes away from the joy of learning? Learning is work. If they like learning, then getting paid is icing on the cake. If they don’t like learning, then getting paid is compensation for their efforts. Either way, I think it depends on the child and either way, I think children should be compensated for a job well done.
Do we pay the kids for good grades? In a sense. If they do well, then they are more apt to get what they want. If they do poorly, there is no way in Hades we’ll even consider giving them something they want. You perform, you get the rewards. You don’t perform, you get grief. Isn’t that how real life works?
what an informative tt! i loved buying notebooks best too, although i usually ended up writing my own stories in them instead of class work!
colleen said, on 12/6/2007 7:40:00 AM
I love the word hodgepodge.
Can that line be considered a love note?
I’m lucky if I visit 3 people on the TT list. It’s so long these days.
shesawriter said, on 12/6/2007 8:16:00 AM
I saved about four of your TT banners. I LOVE them. And your list is fab. I especially liked the sexy body part portion. And I’ve never been to Vegas either, but would LOVE to go someday.
Congrats on crossing the finish line! I did yesterday! Woot! It’s such a great feeling, and you’re not alone in having to start Christmas shopping. Yikes! Happy T13!
Maggie said, on 11/29/2007 7:23:00 AM
only one more day
then you can start relaxing - LOL.
busy said, on 11/29/2007 7:53:00 AM
Tell me about it. Didn’t think I was going to finish this time around. Maybe it is because I am getting older. Nah. Happy TT!
she said, on 11/29/2007 8:13:00 AM
congrats on winning! i petered out this year. too busy.
Believer in Balance said, on 11/29/2007 8:26:00 AM
Some of my favorite Post Secrets. I’m posting these because they resonate with me on some level. What’s your favorite secret? 1. And it’s a sobering day. (That day has come for me). 2. Though the man is certainly not blameless in this scenario, I sort of wonder if the woman chose to focus on her revenge instead of [...]