Lauren, Publicity Assistant
If you haven’t already heard, unfriend is the New Oxford American Dictionary Word of the Year. In honor of this announcement, I surveyed Facebook users across the country about why they would choose to unfriend someone.
1. They’ve turned into a robot.
“People send me Green Patches all the time,” said Jane Kim, a television research assistant in NYC. “It’s annoying. And that’s all I ever get from them. Clearly, they’re not interested in actually being friends.”
That’s because your friends are robots, Jane. Marketing robots. These are the friends you never hear from except when they want you to join a cause, sign a petition, donate money, become a fan of a product, or otherwise promote something. Farmville robots are increasingly becoming problems as well, but are not yet grounds for unfriending.
2. You don’t know who they are.
“A few days ago, Facebook suggested I reconnect with a friend whose name I didn’t recognize,” said Jessica Kay, a lawyer in Kansas City. “She’d recently gotten married, but I hadn’t even known she was engaged. I’ll probably unfriend her later. Along with some random people I met at parties in college.”
“You’re tired of seeing [that mystery name] your newsfeed,” said Jonathan Evans, a contract specialist in Seattle. “You haven’t talked to that person since the random class you took together, and you’ll probably never talk to them again.”
3. They broke your heart.
Jonathan Lethem, author of Chronic City, shared that his number one reason to unfriend someone is “because they just broke up with you on Facebook.”
So, maybe they didn’t break your heart. But if the only reason you were friends on Facebook is because you two were somehow involved, it might be time to play some Beyoncé, crack open the Haagen-Dazs and click “Remove from Friends”.
4. You don’t like them anymore.
In the early years of Facebook, users would friend everyone their dorm, everyone from high school, and every person they had ever shared a sandbox with. But now, many people are finding they no longer like a number of their friends, and spend time creating limited profiles, customizing the newsfeed, and avoiding Facebook chat.
Teresa Hynes, a student at St. John’s University, pointed out that it’s silly to be concerned one of these people might find out you’ve unfriended them and get angry. “You are never going to see them again,” she said. “You don’t want to see them ever again. You hated them in high school. Your mass communications group project is over.”
5. Annoying status updates.
“I don’t want to see ‘So-and-so wishes it was over,’” said Andrew Varhol, a marketing manager in NYC. “Or the cheers of bandwagon sports fans—when suddenly someone’s, ‘Go Yankees! Go Jeter!’ Where were you before October?”
Excessive status updates are one example of Facebook abuse. Amy Labagh of powerHouse Books admits she is irritated by frequent updates. “It’s like they want you to think they’re cool,” she said, “but they’re not.”
A professor at NYU, agreed, and said he finds a number of these frequent updates to be “too bourgie.” “It’ll say something like, ‘So-and-so is drinking whatever in the beautiful scenery of some field.’ I mean, really?!”
The style and type of each update is also important. A number of users agree that song lyrics, poetry, and literary quotations can be extremely annoying. Updates with misspellings or lacking punctuation were also noted. “I once unfriended someone because they updated their statuses in all caps,” said Erin Meehan, a marketing associate in NYC.
6. Obnoxious photo uploads.
Everyone has a different idea about what photos are appropriate to post , but a popular complaint from Facebook users in their 20s concerned wedding and baby photos. “It’s just weird,” said a bartender in Manhattan. “I know that older people are joining now, but if you’re at the stage in your life when most the photos are of your kids, I mean, what are you doing on Facebook?”
“I think makeout photos are worse,” said his coworker. “My sister always posts photos of her and her boyfriend kissing. Sometimes I want to unfriend and unfamily her.”
Across the board, a number of users found partially nude photos, or images of someone flexing their muscles as grounds for unfriending. Another reason, as cited specifically by Margitte Kristjansson, graduate student at UC San Diego, could be if “they upload inappropriate pictures of their stab wounds.”
7. Clashing religious or political views.
“I can’t handle it when someone’s updates are always about Jesus,” said Robert Wilder, a writer in New York.
In the same vein, Phil Lee, lead singer of The Muskies, said he’s extremely irritated by “religious proselytizing and over-enthusiastic praise and Bible quoting. Often in all caps.”
An anonymous Brooklynite shared that he purged his Facebook account after the last Presidential election. “It was a big deal to me,” he said. “I found it hard to be friends with people who didn’t vote for Obama.” After which his friend added, “I voted for McKinney.”
8. “I wanted a free Whopper.”
In January, Burger King launched the Whopper Sacrifice application, which promised each Facebook user a free Whopper if they unfriended 10 people. It sounded simple enough, but if you chose to unfriend someone via the application, it sent a notification to that person, announcing they had been sacrificed for the burger. Burger King disabled the application within the month when the Whopper “proved to be stronger than 233,906 friendships.”
Since Facebook has made the home page much more customizable than it used to be, you might wonder, “Why unfriend when I can hide?” More and more, Facebook users are choosing to use limited profiles and editing their newsfeed so undesirable friends disappear from view. “I find lately I’m friending more people, then blocking them,” said Gary Ferrar, a magician in New York. “That way no one gets mad, no one’s feelings get hurt.”
Do you have another reason? Tell us about it!
Birds are singing, the sun is shining and I am joyful first thing in the morning without caffeine. Why you ask? Because it is Word of the Year time (or WOTY as we refer to it around the office). Every year the New Oxford American Dictionary prepares for the holidays by making its biggest announcement of the year. This announcement is usually applauded by some and derided by others and the ongoing conversation it sparks is always a lot of fun, so I encourage you to let us know what you think in the comments.
Without further ado, the 2009 Word of the Year is: unfriend.
unfriend – verb – To remove someone as a ‘friend’ on a social networking site such as Facebook.
As in, “I decided to unfriend my roommate on Facebook after we had a fight.”
“It has both currency and potential longevity,” notes Christine Lindberg, Senior Lexicographer for Oxford’s US dictionary program. “In the online social networking context, its meaning is understood, so its adoption as a modern verb form makes this an interesting choice for Word of the Year. Most “un-” prefixed words are adjectives (unacceptable, unpleasant), and there are certainly some familiar “un-” verbs (uncap, unpack), but “unfriend” is different from the norm. It assumes a verb sense of “friend” that is really not used (at least not since maybe the 17th century!). Unfriend has real lex-appeal.”
Wondering what other new words were considered for the New Oxford American Dictionary 2009 Word of the Year? Check out the list below.
Technology
hashtag – a # [hash] sign added to a word or phrase that enables Twitter users to search for tweets (postings on the Twitter site) that contain similarly tagged items and view thematic sets
intexticated – distracted because texting on a cellphone while driving a vehicle
netbook – a small, very portable laptop computer with limited memory
paywall – a way of blocking access to a part of a website which is only available to paying subscribers
sexting – the sending of sexually explicit texts and pictures by cellphone
Economy
freemium – a business model in which some basic services are provided for free, with the aim of enticing users to pay for additional, premium features or content
funemployed – taking advantage of one’s newly unemployed status to have fun or pursue other interests
zombie bank – a financial institution whose liabilities are greater than its assets, but which continues to operate because of government support
Politics and Current Affairs
Ardi – (Ardipithecus ramidus) oldest known hominid, discovered in Ethiopia during the 1990s and announced to the public in 2009
birther – a conspiracy theorist who challenges President Obama’s birth certificate
choice mom – a person who chooses to be a single mother
death panel – a theoretical body that determines which patients deserve to live, when care is rationed
teabagger -a person, who protests President Obama’s tax policies and stimulus package, often through local demonstrations known as “Tea Party” protests (in allusion to the Boston Tea Party of 1773)
Environment
brown state – a US state that does not have strict environmental regulations
green state – a US state that has strict environmental regulations
ecotown - a town built and run on eco-friendly principles
Novelty Words
deleb – a dead celebrity
tramp stamp – a tattoo on the lower back, usually on a woman
Notable Word Clusters for 2009:
Twitter related:
Tweeps
Tweetup
Twitt
Twitterati
Twitterature
Twitterverse/sphere
Retweet
Twibe
Sweeple
Tweepish
Tweetaholic
Twittermob
Twitterhea |
Obamaisms:
Obamanomics
Obamarama
Obamasty
Obamacons
Obamanos
Obamanation
Obamafication
Obamamessiah
Obamamama
Obamaeur
Obamanator
Obamaland
Obamalicious
Obamacles
Obamania
Obamacracy
Obamanon
Obamalypse |
Note: I wrote the following post two months ago. Post was seriously delayed because 1) I took film pictures, and 2) life keeps happening. :)
Ty Beanie Babies from Lift Up America's awesome Hollywood Movie Premiere event
Lift Up AmericaSeptember 25, 2007
HOLLYWOOD, CA— So I did this volunteer activity with
Tony W recently, wherein the full-on celebrity treatment was given to a gajillion less fortunate children who got to walk the red carpet on the Hollywood Walk of Fame like the superstars they are (inside) and have their pictures and autographs taken, before attending a real Hollywood premiere. Our role—that of Tony and me and an extraordinary number of other volunteers in yellow t-shirts—was to offer support to the glamorously dressed,
actual celebrities who played the front line of paparazzi and fans, by way of handing them Ty Beanie Babies and designer bracelets to heap upon the kids. We also got to play the madding crowd ourselves, clamoring for autographs and taking photos, too. (That's what Tony and I really did: played paparazzi.)
This is the kind of thing that sounds awesome at first blush, but that immediately gave me pause. I was like, Wait a sec.
I don't have dreams of walking the red carpet and doing this whole thing. Why is
this the experience we're giving these kids? How "less fortunate" are they? Less fortunate enough that they might appreciate the resources being used toward something a little more . . .
practical??I know, I know; I could not
believe I was thinking this, either. That's
so not the way I think, normally. But for some reason, before this event started, I even went so far in my cynicism as to say, out loud, "Doesn’t this sound like such the Hollywood idea of a charity event? You know: 'Let them walk the red carpet!'"
I normally disapprove of cynics and haters, especially when it comes to other people’s good deeds. I think . . . I've just lived too close to "the Industry" these past few years, plus haven't watched TV in forever, so my associations with Hollywood have gotten especially specific and disconnected. It’s also been a while since I've given real
time to a volunteer activity (as opposed to money), so part of me was surprised and questioning all around.
But, so. This event was the real deal: Full-on red carpet; all the big lights and huge-screen TVs;
traffic blocked-off all around Hollywood & Highland. There were velvet ropes and security guards everywhere. Spots were labeled where photographers from major journals and newspapers would stand. Pedestrians craned their necks in huge crowds across the street, trying to figure out what was going on.
It was like we were at the Oscars.
“Can I get your autograph, please??”
The second I said anything to Tony about my doubts, he busted up. It hadn't occurred to him to ask what, exactly, we were "teaching" these kids—like if we were sending a message of materialism (his words)—or feeding them the
US Weekly dream (mine). He did inform me, however, that he had looked into the organization a little more after he'd first emailed me. He'd first heard about this event through an entertainment listserv, which hadn't provided many details, but he had since found out, for example, that all the children who needed hearing aids or glasses had been given those things. So when
those children went into Mann’s Chinese to watch the movie, they would be able to enjoy the experience fully—in addition to getting free drinks and popcorn.
So, that was cool.
Others were indeed being given food, and, as the night went on, we could see for ourselves that all kinds of other cool organizations had also come together under the aegis of this larger, umbrella event to let disadvantaged people of all types join in the fun.
[
EDIT from 12/4/07—I have since learned that a potential value of six million dollars of scholarship money was also distributed—in $5,000 coupons to every child at the event—by a participating college.]
I was looking forward to the red-carpet aspect of this night from the beginning, just from a photography standpoint. I’d never been to a red-carpet anything before, and this seemed like an cool way to see what that was like. I also realized, during the final seconds of that countdown, that I was
made for this role. To act like paparazzi
and get all enthusiastic, treating every next kid like a
star?? That's what I live for!
Look! On-the-spot interviews conducted from the red carpet, rolling real tape!
"So how would you describe how you're feeling right now? Is there anything you'd like to say to your fans?"
Of course, the whole evening was awesome. The kids loved it, the celebs loved it; everyone had an a
mazing time. We got more inventive in our role as fans as the night went on. In the beginning, we shouted all the obvious stuff: "Can I get your autograph?" —"Me, too! Me, too!!" –“Wait!! One more, PLEASE??!” One of the guys walking along as a chaperone started joking around, acting like a manager for one of the kids, saying, “No more autographs, please! What?
One more? All right,
one more, but then we have to get going. What?
One more?? Alll right, but that's it!” until the girl (who had Down Syndrome) had to shout quite forcefully, without looking over her shoulder, “I! Don’t
mind!!” That made us all laugh.
But there was one guy—
actually, a couple guys—
actually,
several guys—
who
really took it to the next level and inspired all the rest of us. One of them drank a Red Bull right before the start, and he never stopped yelling, "There she is!! It’s
her! Get ready!!" and "Here he comes!! That's
him! I can't believe it!" at
every next kid that came down the line.
That, for me, was the heart of the matter, and that guy
nailed it. I started copying him, and everyone started shouting each other's best lines over and over—each time with
gusto, like it was for the first time—cracking each other
up. An event is what you make it, and these people made it awesome.
We also got better at the whole art of straining over and under and
through each other (as shown to us by another of the actors) to create a tangle of arms and notepads in the kids' faces. With the bright lights and popping flashes, we made a good scene.
This guy on the right was not the Red Bull guy, but he was also super awesome, really leaning in and acting super excited to meet every kid—asking questions and soaking in and appreciating every moment of attention they gave him. I was moved.
All the celebs were awesome. They gave this night flair.
Afterward, as each kid walked away, my Red Bull friend would still be all, "YEAHHH!! She hooked us up with that autograph!! I got her autograph!! YEAH!!"
My autograph card (actually the front and back of my volunteer namecard, since I didn't get one of the little autograph notepads they handed out) got filled up pretty quickly. It wasn’t until that happened that I realized I had something even better to contribute than getting autographs. I was carrying a huge
camera, hel
lo! What was I thinking?
I had actually been shooting film (for my black and white darkroom class) and my one roll had gotten used up in the first five minutes. But that meant I could pop the flash everywhere now, without consequences.
I was shooting blanks.
I wished I was shooting real images. Tony was getting awesome shots the whole night on his digital. Eventually I broke down and bought another roll of film (color) from a tourist shop—which lasted another five minutes.
"Smile for the camera, please! This way, this way!"
"Over here! Quick photo! Smile!"
Other people chimed in around me, directing the kids' attention my way (even though there were plenty of cameras going off). People paused mid-autograph to look up and pose. This thing we already knew, was more evident than ever: if you treat people like stars, they shine.
How can you argue with that? He's in a wheelchair! And he's radiant!
The most affecting thing was the parents and chaperones that walked alongside their kids. Some laughed and were taken aback by our crazed behavior, but a few of them cried and touched their hearts and mouthed
Thank you at us from behind their kids, as the kids signed and shook hands and worked their way down the line.
That got me. I wasn't prepared.
My hard, hard heart was melting.
It was obvious that the celebrity contingent, at least, had no doubts whatsoever that this was the most amazing night ever. They kept saying, "This is a
great event for the kids. This is
incredible. This is
awesome." (And that same little voice inside me kept replying, Well of course
you think that!) There were also a few schmoopy people affiliated with the organization who had clearly put a lot of hard work into this night, who were shedding tears left and right.
I did recognize one of the celebs: the guy who played the deaf football player in
The Replacements. (Woo hoo for
The Replacements!) Before I saw him, Tony and I had speculated whether any of the actors would be recognizable, whether their agents had told them to come, whether they were being paid, etc. (Not that any of that would be bad, and not that I believed for one second they weren’t genuinely into it.) I Googled this event just now, and apparently some of the actors were from
The Office and
Heroes. The Hulk (Lou Ferrigno) was there, too.
There was one moment when a celeb answered his cell phone and I totally heard him reply, "I'm at Mann's Chinese right now, signing autographs." He was all, "Yeah,
I'm signing! You hear that? You hear
that??" And he held up his phone to the whole whooping, cheering crowd and was all, "That's all for
me!"I hope that was his friend on the line whose leg he was pulling, whom he planned to tell the truth later. 'Cause
that'd be hilarious, but otherwise, yikes.
About an hour into this thing, I began to understand what about this gig qualified as
volunteer work. The kids were getting dropped off at the start of the red carpet via an endless parade of limousines, and there was no sign we were even halfway through.
"This celebrity-stalking thing is exhausting!" someone joked, just as I was feeling it. "I have a whole new respect for these people!"
But all the fans around me were brilliant, and we kept getting more inventive, and every next kid hadn't heard our bits yet. By the end, I wished we could go back and do it all over again for the kids who had walked in the beginning.
As a kid, I totally pretended to be in this situation now and then. Of course I did. ("Thank you, thank you! No more autographs, please! I'd like to thank all the little people—") And if you think about it in a metaphorical way, then I'm still pursuing this dream now. It was just the literal realization, the physical signs and signifiers of opulence, that took me aback in the beginning. But, as my good friend
Sara says, “Anything that makes people feel special is good.”
True that, my friend.
True.
That.R.
P.S.
Read more about this event and other Lift Up America events coming to cities near you! (The second link has photos of the actors.)
http://www.christianexaminer.com/Articles/Articles%20Oct07/Art_Oct07_01.htmlhttp://www.liftupamerica.org/Spotlight/Hollywood2a.htmlhttp://community.tvguide.com/blog-entry/TVGuide-News-Blog/Tv-Guide-News/Heroes-Stars-Ventimiglia/800023036http://www.backstage.com/bso/news_reviews/film/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1003647014There's a more complete list of links here:
http://liftupamerica.org/pastevents.html#hollywoodAnd don't forget
Tony W's Web site, with all the great photos
he took!!
I even spotted a couple pictures of Tony and me on the other sites—just from knowing where in the crowd to look. :)
It's funny, because when we were first told to hand Beanie Babies to the "celebrities," Tony and I couldn't tell if they meant actual actors were coming, or if they were referring directly to the kids. I didn't think they meant the latter, but the idea grew on me and was very pleasing. (Just the idea this organization had decreed the kids would
always be called "celebrities.") I was a little disappointed when a train of glamorously dressed grownups showed up at the last moment. But only for that reason. The presence of the celebs definitely amped up the production value of the night and made it awesome. :)
P.P.P.P.P.P.S.
I mentioned this post was initially delayed because I took pictures with film. Actually, only the color roll caused delay. The black and white roll I took to my class and within hours held 8x10 glossy enlargements in my hands—that I had processed and printed myself! That was incredibly gratifying.
Here, however, was a photo I was
unhappy with:
Somehow I managed to take a picture that conveyed the exact
opposite of the spirit of this event! This was while we were waiting for everything to start. In fact, this is the moment the kids first realized they could see themselves on the huge-screen TV. They got all excited and started goofing off—and we cracked up and took pictures. But I could feel mine was wrong the moment I took it.
It looks like the ribbon-cutting-ceremony tape is keeping them
out! This is my fault as a photographer, and it gives me lots to think about. We are all storytellers, always . . . (Well,
I think of it as storytelling. If you were in sales, for example, then you would say,
Everyone is selling something.) The point is, we need to stay in control of the messages we're sending out.
:) :)
r
[Written on March 10, 2007. Photos added on March 23rd, with apologies in advance.]
Well, I got the self-portrait assignment back. Every pic represented a major compromise between composition, exposure, and focus, since I never had a shot that nailed all three. Compared to the photos people shared in class, I thought I had failed completely. In fact, I thought I would be asked not only to "redo" the assignment, but to go back and take the classes I'd skipped!
But, apparently, the whole lot was still worth a B+.
I didn't quite make it up to ten "significantly different" shots, though I did hope Damon's hiding in the second beach shot would count as different enough. I also considered the first two a "pair," for which I had at least moved the camera.
Roll over each image if you're curious what other criteria we had.
The instructor actually gave me some compliments, and after I heard more how others had fared, I concluded I could stay in the class. Still, I was frustrated.
He doesn't know I took over
one thousand pictures to produce eight-and-a-half almost decent shots! At a success rate of .0085, that's not mojo. That's luck!
Here's what I'm talking about:
Pretty bad, eh? Having over one thousand thumbnails of myself made me want to both laugh and weep.
At one point, I got the bright idea to do a portrait with
no background at all, "like blue screen." I thought, Hey!
That could be different!
Having never used manual focus before and with
no reference points, this was definitely not the way to go. I basically focused on a woman passing by, then ran over and started jumping around on the sand, trying to find the exact spot she had been. Damon stood over to one side, highly entertained and shouting
"Do Vaudeville!"In my mind, I thought by confronting the camera directly and hamming it up like this, I was both making a rebellious commentary on the artificial nature of
all self portraits
and revealing the cheeseball side of my personality. But, this was just because I was out of ideas.
The goal was
not to land in the middle of the pictures, because middle="bad" in this class. The goal was to hit one of the four,
off-middle spots that would have given my photo the illusion I'd followed
"The Rule of Thirds," which we had just learned.
The
reason we had been assigned self portraits, however, as our instructor explained, was to force us to think our shots out so thoroughly in advance (exposure, focus,
composition, intent) that by the time we set it up, we wouldn't even need to look through the camera to take it.
So, after this blue-sky experiment, I realized the folly of this approach.
I did learn the advantage of manual exposure, however. The blue of the sky stayed constant regardless of whether I made it into the shot or not! That was neat.
Some people in the class
really stylized their shots. Full costume, gorgeous on-location shoots, and, in one case, even professional, Hollywood, horror-movie makeup—because they're going into fashion and movies and that's just how they think.
I, on the other hand, love showing people having a good time—preferably laughing. So when it came to pictures I might want of myself, all I could think of, at first, was to stage "candids." Of
myself. Damon and I have actually staged "candids" of ourselves in the past. For our first two wedding anniversaries, we got dressed up and took the tripod to favorite L.A. locations like the downtown public library, where we
almost got married. We basically set the timer on the camera, ran in front of it, and started "acting natural." This was just goofy enough to crack us up the whole time, which made the pictures almost work.
Taking a candid
solo is trickier, however. For this I set the camera up to fire at irregular intervals, hoping I'd forget and catch myself off-guard.
Ha!
Here's what I've learned about self portraits: unless you stage the thing
super obviously—via posing, costuming, or some overt artifice—you have to look right into the camera for a picture to look deliberate at all. In fact, for my last attempt, I decided I'd better just sit my butt down in a chair and look right
at the camera. Many of the stellar shots our teacher had shown had featured people doing exactly this. The manual focusing issue instantly got easier.
Here's a picture of a chair I borrowed from my upstairs neighbor.
This was actually "golden hour," but on a cloudy day.
And here are some photos from when the humor of the situation finally hit me, and I was able to look into the camera for real. I had adjusted my Rule of Thirds positioning by this time, too.
No more daylight to be had, alas. My lens's settings were maxed out.
As I reviewed the results, I suddenly saw what would have happened if I had brought everything together.
That's education!
r
P.S.
Thumbnails were added on March 23rd. Look what happens when I don't leave spaces between the "blue screen" pics!
Yikes. That could make a
really scary webpage banner.
R.
Happy Blogiversary!
Congrats!!! Enjoy the celebration ;-)
Congratulations on the Blogiversary. This post made me stop to try to remember if our characters ate anything memorable. Great job!
Eating makes our characters more realistic, more human, just more, I think. Happy blogiversary.
Happy blogiversary!
Happy Blogiversary - time flies when you're having fun!!! :)
Thank you all so much for the kind wishes!
They'll be the fuel that keeps me blogging for another year :)
I love to eat, that makes me smile, so I decided to give this post a Sunshine Award:
http://callsignwreckingcrew.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-sunshine-award.html
Yes, our characters did eat and not just MRE (Meals Ready to Eat) either.