by James Mihaley
With summer rapidly approaching, kids are wondering about summer jobs. Here are a few you may be interested in:
Summer Job 1: Valet parking spaceships at a hotel on Jupiter
No, you don’t need a driver’s license. However, you must have extensive experience playing video games. It will also help if you’ve read Chapter Three of my book, You Can’t Have My Planet But Take My Brother, Please. The main character, Giles, gets hired to valet park spaceships. You can learn some tips from Giles, like what to do if a shrunken head keychain starts talking to you when you stick the key in the ignition.
Summer Job 2: Working as an eyeball retriever for Dr. Melissa Sprinkles
In my book, Dr. Melissa Sprinkles is an extremely important alien mad scientist. She creates eco-droids that turn paper back into trees. Giles wouldn’t be able to clean New York City if it wasn’t for Dr. Sprinkles.
Dr. Sprinkles has a moveable face. It shifts to different parts of her body. Once in a while, an eyeball will actually leave her body to go watch a movie or to check out the sunset. You must retrieve the wandering eyeball for Dr. Sprinkles.
If you do a really good job, she might give you your very own eco-droid. Then you can go around your neighborhood turning discarded paper back into trees. You’ll become a hero.
Summer Job 3: Working as a poet at a factory on Neptune that makes spaceships that run on rhyming
Giles has a spaceship that runs on rhyming. He uses it to remove graffiti from the streets of Manhattan. We desperately need poets to work at that factory because aliens don’t rhyme well. They do lots of other stuff really well but they’re lousy rhymers.
You probably didn’t know spaceships can run on rhyming. Well, they can, just like the environmental movement runs on kid power. Natural beauty will never survive without kids cleaning up, kids teaching their parents how to recycle and encouraging them to use solar power, and kids doing everything they can to help protect endangered species.
I’ve just listed three summer jobs that require kid power. If any of these jobs interest you, please shoot me an e-mail at Jmihaley@yahoo.com and I’ll pass it on.
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