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| Ian at his home in spring 2014 |
I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since my youngest brother, Ian, has left us. Truth be known, we actually got closer when he was diagnosed with cancer over two years ago. I’d phone him once a week, and he’d phone me when he was feeling up to it. He brought his son to our ‘Farewell to the Cottage’ party and had fun watching him fish and hang out with the family. Oh, there were times when I wanted to slap my brother across the back of his head for his bad behavior and callousness in the past. I know I’m not the only sibling in that boat! LOL! Still, in the end, Ian was my brother. And as the old saying goes, blood is thicker than water.
They say you can choose your friends but not your family. But I believe that we choose the family we want to be with before we’re born. Scary concept, eh? We choose what lessons we want to learn from our family that will help our souls grow, develop, and evolve into someone better than before we were born. And when those lessons are over, the teacher leaves us.
So this got me to thinking. What lessons did my brother teach me? I did a little time traveling, since I’ve been so good at that lately, and came up with some answers…
I remember when I got my father’s station wagon crooked in the garage and tried to straighten it. Um, not one of my finest moments. I scraped both sides of the car, until I realized that there was no way I could straighten it. So what did I do? I ran crying to my two brothers. I swear they couldn’t stop laughing, but my heart was pounding so hard knowing I was gonna get in trouble. Ian managed to get the car out, and drove it back into the garage with no sweat.
Lesson learned:Patience is a virtue. Oh, and never try to straighten a big-ass car in a small garage.
I remember when I used to cheer Ian on during his hockey games. I wished like hell I could have played hockey back then. But being born in a time when no such opportunities existed, I settled for being his team’s number one booster.
Lesson learned:A team doesn’t just consist of players. The backbone of any sport is comprised of the blood, sweat, and cheers of all family members. Plus, I believe I found my true voice with all that cheerleading I did!
I remember when Ian let me drive his and my other brother’s green Challenger. Somehow, I managed to put one of the front wheels into a ditch while backing out. I think we had to pull it out with my father’s station wagon (yes, the same one that got a garage door make-over). Again, my brother got me out of another tight spot and didn’t berate at me.
Lesson learned:I always have the support I need to overcome obstacles. And never make wide turns in a small driveway.
I remember when my brother and his best buddy sat on me so I couldn’t go to church. They held me down until it was too late to attend. Um, yeah. Hope God forgave them for that one. Still, I know Ian was never one for religion or going to church, and sometimes we all have our faith tested again and again to see if our beliefs have changed from when we were kids. I know mine have.
Lesson learned:Develop an understanding of where other people are coming from. Even if those people are sitting on you.
I remember when my brother tried (operative word here is tried) to teach me how to drive three on the tree in his red truck. He drove me down to the town’s fairgrounds where I could practice shoving the stick-shift in the column. About ten grinds later, we called it quits before I did something very bad to the transmission. He never took me out again.
Lesson learned:When something doesn’t work for you, just let it go.
Finally, I remember when we celebrated the first Christmas during Ian’s apprenticeship as a mechanic. He bought us some wonderful and expensive gifts, and I truly appreciated his generosity. I still have part of that gift – the mirror to the tea caddy he bought me. Ian was very generous to our family that year, and I believe our father would have been so proud of him, had he lived.
Lesson learned:Enjoy the fruits of your labors, so that you may share them with those you love the most.
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| Ian celebrating our 'Farewell to the Cottage' party |
As the first year of your absence in our lives comes to a close, I want to just thank you for choosing me as your big sister, Ian. It was a truly a gift from the Universe, and I believe I made the right choice too. Here’s a toast to you, who in the end, will always be my little brother…
“Be grateful to those who left you, for their absence gave you the strength to grow in the space they abandoned.” ~ Dodinsky
This past August, I was privileged to take part in one of my sister-in-law’s (SIL) revered family traditions: making tomato sauce. Oh the carnage, the mess, the bloodbath! Of course, I’m talking about all the prep work that goes into making my SIL’s secret family tomato sauce. No worries, SIL. I won’t divulge your mother’s sacred recipe—only what I’ve learned from participating in such a fun, family ritual.
First, like writing a book, making tomato sauce requires a whole lot of preparation! There are the tomato bushels to order and pick up. Get the equipment out. Setting up the equipment and tables. Scheduling family members. Buying tomato paste and spices. I tell you it’s a first-class production!
Second, delegation is the key. I looked at this entire operation through the eyes of an author and thought how genius my SIL is. She stationed certain family members for washing the tomatoes (as a newbie, I got to help my nephew with that job). Other family and drop-by neighbors (poor buggers) were commissioned to cut up the tomatoes into quarters. Then, once a few bushels were filled up with severed tomatoes (I know, sounds horrific), they’re placed in a grinder that separates the skins and seeds from the juice, which flows into a large pot set on a propane burner.
Third, once the pot is full (four fingers from the top—believe me this is a science), the burner is lit, and the tomato juice has to come to a rapid boil.
Fourth, once the juice boils, the secret ingredients must be added. This is my niece’s specialty, and she has this down to an art. And if I spill the beans here, she will hunt me down, and squish me like one of those poor tomatoes. Yikes! After the said ‘secret ingredients’ are in the pot, the tomato juice must be set to boil for 45 minutes.
Fifth, a small pot of tomato juice is scooped out of the large pot after the 45 minutes has expired, then placed into another pot with about two large scoops of tomato paste. This concoction is mixed together and placed back into the large, boiling pot. This is akin to editing, rewriting, editing, and rewriting until the author is happy with the story. It’s the process that solidifies the sauce (or in my case, story).
Sixth, finally comes the jarring. Honestly, it’s like being on a production line. SIL stands ready with a jar while my brother pours the sauce into a one liter jar. She quickly puts a lid on it, turns the jar upside down, and goes on to the next jar until the whole pot is emptied. They usually make about 4 pots which fills 50 jars per pot. Wow, that’s a whole lotta sauce!
The whole tomato sauce ordeal takes about twelve hours (not counting prep time) and is a hell of a lot of work. So the question I pose to you is, was this family tradition worth the time, energy, and effort? YOU BET IT WAS! Not only did we make enough tomato sauce to carry three to four households over the year, but we were TOGETHER the entire day. Other then holidays and celebrations, how often does that happen in this day and age?
Family traditions, no matter what they are comprised of, keep the bloodline going long after the older generation have gone. Part of what has been passed along flows to the next generation, and hopefully the next one, and the next. And that is one of the reasons why I write books—to pass on what I’ve learned and experienced from my family and from my life.
Do you have any long-standing family traditions you participate in? Or have you started a new one? Love to hear your comments. Cheers and thanks for reading my blog!
Normally I review chidren's or YA books on this blog, but during my recuperation period I've been catching up with some adult reading. What a treat, really. I love kid lit, but occasionally I miss, you know, fat paragraphs, long sentences, bigger vocabulary. So I'll be reporting on those good reads for awhile, some as reviews, and some simply as musings on what I've read.
Recently I had the pleasure of reading
J. L. Campbell's fine book,
Dissolution, set in contemporary Jamaica.
Sherryn and Reece (short for Maurice) have a nice home, a passionate relationship, and five children that brighten their lives. Reece owns his own business. Sherryn has her own home business baking and decorating cakes. Life is good. Then one day the doorbell rings, and Sherryn opens the door to find a scantily clad, bejeweled woman who thrusts a young boy into the room -- a boy who looks exactly like Sherryn's husband and is even named Maurice. Thus begins a painful journey for both Sherryn and Reece as they struggle with the unintended consequences of a festering and prolonged quarrel that led to Reese's sole one-night stand five years earlier.
Both Sherryn and Reese are likeable characters with a mixture of sterling virtues and all too human flaws. Reece grew up in a ghetto, abandoned by parents, semi-raised by another tenant, and determined to make something better of his own life. He's a good father, a devoted husband, a proud businessman. But he can't break ties to friends in his old neighborhood, especially Rodney, who seems always in trouble. And his early life has made him controlling, wanting to keep his wife dependent. Sherryn has a big heart, loves her husband and family and friends. But, when angry, she shuts down and won't communicate, resorting to the cold, silent treatment. And she's very independent.
Gloria, the one-night stand, has been blackmailing Reece for years. She has two other children by another blackmail victim, vindictively delivering the children to their fathers when they don't agree to her higher priced silence. Rodney proves a complicated friend: He's the one friend Reece can talk to, but solves many of his own problems by violence and gives very poor advice.
All of the characters are beleveably portrayed, including the children. I feel I would recognize any one of them were I to meet them in person.
As for plot, the author keeps things moving: Stunned by her husband's infidelity, Sherryn is nonetheless filled with compassion for the little boy, Maurice Jr., who has obviously been neglected and mistreated. She can't help nurturing him, while still torturing herself about what kind of relationship exactly her husband had with Gloria. Their children accept the situation, but even as Maurice is welcomed into the family, Sherryn cannot forgive her husband. All of this is just for starters! Then, when things seem to be getting better, they get worse. Just when you think they can't get any worse -- they do. Lots worse! Before the books end someone is murdered. Who is the victim? And who did it?
You'll have to read the story.
Hello all in The Land of Blog. It is I, the Incredible Super Spy Darth Bill!!!! Well, I have been doing some serious sleuthing (like Sherlock Holmes) and wish to present to you some great reads I have uncovered recently. So here we go:For the first review The CARLMAN and I decided that, since we both loved these books (Graphic Novels), and since the comics have been around a long time (even way back when we where young...ouch), we'd read them again. Don't worry though--these books have been put back out in a fresh format and are as good as ever.
Spy vs Spy: Danger! Intrigue! Stupidity! by Antonio Prohias - This is an extremely funny Graphic Novel (GN) that is being reprinted from the pages of Mad Magazine. The basic premise is you have these two extremely goofy spies out to get each other with more often than not something going horribly wrong in a hilarious manner. I don't normally do this, but I want in this case to give a little background information on the gentleman responsible for this eternally funny series of comics. This is taken from the book itself:
"Spy vs Spy was the brainchild of Cuban-born political cartoonist Antonio Prohias, who fled his country after receiving death threats from Fidel Castro. Prohias settled in America, and in 1960 he began a 26 year run of Spy misadventures in Mad Magazine." Sounds like a pretty interesting guy to me.
If you like extremely funny tricks gone wrong, random blowing up of things and whacks over the head and crafty tricks. Do not miss out on this GN among some others I am recommending in this GN Series:
Spy vs Spy: Missions of MadnessSpy vs Spy : Masters of May
Authors: Peter Parnell and Justin Richardson
Illustrator: Henry Cole
In this charming book, two penguins at the New York Central Park Zoo fall in love and start a family. The twist? The two penguins are both dudes! And Tango Makes Three is based on the true story of Roy and Silo, two male penguins who become inseparable and, with the help of a progressive zookeeper, become the first same-sex couple at the zoo. This unique relationship soon makes them a featured attraction as they challenge the American public's perceptions of gender relations.
So what's next for this celebrity family? Well, having captured the imagination of animal lovers everywhere, Roy and Silo decide to leverage their newfound fame and request a transfer to the world-renowned San Diego Zoo. Not only will they get greater exposure at their posh new digs, but they will be able to live in a city that has unexpectedly found itself on cutting edge of gay rights. Last week Jerry Sanders, mayor of the overwhelmingly conservative San Diego, came out in support of gay marriage in a surprising and heartfelt announcement (see below).
Mayor Sanders is sure to encounter some backlash, but hopefully his gutsy announcement will set the example for other politicians. And who knows? If he can effectively utilize the adorable And Tango Makes Three crew to provide some much-needed P.R. support, he might even make it to the next election.
Library Controversy Note: Of course a children's book about a same-sex couple will stir some controversy. When it first came out, many concerned parents took issue with the penguins' rainbow connection and tried to shield their children from its unconventional portrayal of love. Most offended localities tried to ban the book, but in Missouri, parents had the bright idea to have the book moved to the school library's non-fiction section.
Close-minded? Perhaps.
Politically savvy? Most definitely.
Whereas other parents went through official channels to get rid of the book and ran into legal difficulties, Missouri circumvented the system by burying it in the non-fiction section of the library... which is like hiding candy in the vegetable drawer. What kid is ever going to look for it there? Whether or not you agree with their stance on homosexuality, you have to give them some props for their kooky ingenuity.
Though this plan may backfire... now that And Tango Makes Three is in the non-fiction section, penguin homosexuality is officially a fact and will be used as a reference book for elementary school research projects on penguins all over Missouri. The Show Me State will never look at penguins the same again.
A poem for back-to-school season for all parents who teach, guide, educate, explain, discuss, and develop.
Most of the great English poet Robert Browning's education took place at home, centering around his father's library of some 6,000 volumes in English, as well as French, ancient Greek, and Latin. He began composing rhymes even before he learned to read and write by the age of five. Browning
Author: Giles Andreae
Illustrator: David Wojtowycz
I have to admit that I was somewhat disappointed when I read this book. Not for what the book is (a fun and colorful collection of jungle poetry), but for what the book is not. Because of the title, I was hoping that it was an illustrated account of THE Rumble in the Jungle, the epic 1974 boxing match between Muhammad Ali and George Foreman that took place in Zaire.
Alas, it was not to be. Which is a shame, because with his unique lyrical stylings and cocky sense of humor, Ali would be the perfect candidate to author a children's book. Unfortunately, since Ali hasn't picked up the pen, we'll have to settle for George Foreman's silly book: Let George Do It!
Author: George Foreman and Fran Manushkin
Illustrator: Whitney Martin
George Foreman has five sons and they are all named George. Not George Junior, George III, or even Curious George... just George. The story follows the crazy mishaps that result from the logistical nightmare of having an entire house of Georges. (Apparently, the original George was so blinded by his crippling megalomania that didn't foresee this being a problem.)
With this picture book, George Foreman's transformation is complete. If you remember him from his boxing days (or if you watch the documentary When We Were Kings), George Foreman was quite possibly the scariest man alive. His sheer size and grizzly scowl were enough to give me the willies even though 3 decades and a television screen separate me from his devastating ham-sized fists.
And now? He is the grinning goofball of George Foreman Grills and a children's book author. Talk about reinventing yourself. Ali may have won the fight on that balmy night in 1974, but give Foreman credit for picking himself up off the mat and infomercialing his way back into our hearts.
Conspiracy Theory Note: Have you ever noticed the eerie similarity between the design aesthetic of the George Foreman Grill...
...and Apple laptops?
Apple's departure from the standard small black laptop design to the refreshingly sleek look launched sales into the stratosphere as they became the hip choice for a generation that defines themselves by their computer use. It is now impossible to go into any coffeeshop or college campus without the ubiquitous glare of the glowing Apple logo. I had always assumed that the aesthetic similarity to the simple and clean design of the Foreman grill was just a coincidence... until I stumbled upon this:
The George Foreman iGrill
"The iGrill is an indoor/outdoor electric grill/roaster with a built-in dock to play your favorite grillin' tunes from your iPod or other MP3 player."
There is only one possible explanation for the release of this absurdity: Foreman was threatening to sue Apple CEO Steve Jobs for stealing his design and they agreed upon an out-of-court settlement. In exchange for dropping the lawsuit, Apple would outfit the Foreman grill for iPod compatibility... despite the fact that no one in their right minds would buy this ridiculous contraption. (Even Sharper Image, the Mecca of Craptastically Useless Gadgets, doesn't carry it.)
Now if they really wanted to make it a worthwhile product and take it to the next level, they could rig the iGrill so that the grease pan (a.k.a. reservoir of fat drippings) connects directly to some kind of biodiesel conversion devise so that you could charge your iPod using the discarded fat from your porkchops.
Now that, my friends, is a tangible step towards a better tomorrow. Who's going to fix the environment? Let George Do It!
A call to arms in today's Globe & Mail, from Kate Tennier (who by the way is founder of Advocates for Childcare Choice and a former primary school teacher):
On Being a Retro-Progressive
by Kate Tennier
I've recently discovered the joy of baking cookies. Although Hillary Clinton famously does not want to make them, I do.
Producing homemade snacks may not bring world peace but it has brought an
Today, we are pleased to welcome Kyra Hicks, the distinguished author and quilter extraordinaire to the Bottom Shelf. I could try to list all of the Ms. Hicks' accomplishments and distinctions, but that might leave me with carpal tunnel syndrome. Seriously, the woman has done a lot! So here is the link to her impressive bio.
She joins us today to discuss her book, Martha Ann's Quilt For Queen Victoria, which is based on the true story about a former slave who moves to Liberia with her family, and whose determination leads her to a personal meeting with the Queen of England (back when being the Queen of England actually meant more than just wearing funny hats).
But enough from me, let's get down to business. Without further ado, here are Five Picture Book Related Questions For Kyra Hicks.
BSB: What inspired you to turn Martha Ann's story into a children’s book?
Kyra: I’ve spent more than five years researching Martha Ann Ricks’ life and wanted to share her inspiration with a younger generation. I was inspired by many elements that are not traditionally written in picture books such as the African American experience in Liberia or about Black folks meeting British Royalty or about a Black father purchasing his family out of slavery.
BSB: Is there a strong connection between quilting and storytelling?
Kyra: I believe there is a strong connection between quilting and storytelling on two levels. The first is the creation of story quilts where the quilt is the canvas for the story itself. The story is sewn onto the quilt. Many kids and librarians will recognize Faith Ringgold’s famous Tar Beach story quilt as an example of this kind of connection.
The second connection is in the transmitting of the story behind a quilt. An example is when a family member shares insights about who made a family quilt, points out familiar pieces of cloth within the quilt or share the reasons why the quilt was created in the first place. The Patchwork Quilt by Valerie Flournoy is an example of the oral quilt tradition.
BSB: Was quilting introduced to Liberia by the African Americans who came through the American Colonization Society? Is quilting part of the culture in Liberia today?
Kyra: There were dozens of indigenous tribes in Liberia before the first American settlers arrived in the 1820s. I haven’t researched the textile traditions of the various tribes to know if they included quilting techniques. I do know, though, that many black folks who emigrated to Liberia in the nineteenth century quilted. In fact, there were monetary prizes given for quilts at the first National Fair in Liberia in 1857. Yes, quilting remains apart of Liberian textile arts today.
BSB: What lessons do you hope children will take away from your book?
Kyra: The primary lessons I hope kids learn from Martha Ann’s Quilt for Queen Victoria are that dreaming huge is permissible and that achieving one’s dreams takes work. Martha Ricks spent 50 years, or if you’d rather five decades or 18,250 days, pursuing her dream in the face of ridicule and a low bank balance. Yet, she achieved what few in the world did. She had an audience with Queen Victoria.
I’ve been to a few school visits and continue to be amazed by what the boys and girls pull out of the book. I tried to capture many of their questions and comments in a free discussion guide.
BSB: Do you have any plans for more picture books? Are there other famous quilters that you think would make for good characters?
Kyra: Yes, I do plan to continue to write picture books, with an emphasis on historical characters. I am researching my next picture book now. As for other famous quilters, I’d love to see a picture book about the nineteenth century quilter Harriet Powers, creator of the Bible Quilt, which is part of the Smithsonian National Museum of American History collection. I’d also love to read a picture book about the nineteenth century African American Siamese twins Millie-Christine.
And now, a few non-picture book related questions:
BSB: If you were making a quilt to send a message to the next president of the United States, what would you put on it?
Kyra: HOPE!
BSB: If you were forced to be on one reality television show, what would it be and why?
Kyra: I can’t sew clothes worth a darn, but I’d LOVE to be on Project Runway for its creative energy and inspiring assignments. And, what quilter wouldn’t LOVE to be given x dollars and let loose in a fabric store?
So there you have it. Thank you Kyra! To read more about Ms. Hicks, check out BlackThreads.com and her blog about kid's lit. Also, look for more of her work in your local bookstore... and tune into Bravo and see if you can find Kyra matching wits with the devastating (in oh so many ways) Heidi Klum on Season 3 of Project Runway. Watch what happens.
Author: Sam McBratney
Illustrator: Anita Jeram
This classic is one of those quietly perfect books, a true masterpiece where the tone, pacing, and illustrations hit the right note each time. In it, Little Nutbrown Hare and Big Nutbrown Hare go back and forth telling the other one how much they love eachother, playfully trying to outdo the other.
Little Nutbrown Hare uses his arms, legs, toes, and whatever else he has at his disposal (i.e. "I love you as high as I can reach,"). It is the nature of love that we use whatever we can find to demonstrate it. For those of us who are artistically inclined, it may come in the form of a painting or a drawing. Or if you fancy yourself a writer, then maybe you'd write a beautiful love poem.
Or if you happen to be one of the greatest rock guitarists to ever live, I guess you'd write an immortal song. Check out this unbelievable story I read in The Week:
Pattie Boyd (left) inspired two rock 'n' roll legends to create their most beautiful music. In 1969, her husband, George Harrison, wrote his biggest hit, "Something," for her. A year later, their good friend Eric Clapton drew her aside. "He played me the most powerful, moving song I had ever heard," Boyd tells the London Daily Mail, "It was 'Layla,' about a man who fall hopelessly in love with a woman who loves him but is unavailable. He played it to me two or three times, all the while watching my face intently for my reaction. My first thought was, 'Oh God, everyone's going to know this is about me.'"
Boyd had rebuffed Clapton, but he kept trying, and told Harrison, "Man, I'm in love with your wife." One night, Clapton arrived at Harrison's house drunk, and the two men decided to fight over Boyd--with music. "George handed him a guitar and an amp, as an 18th-century gentleman might have handed his rival a sword, and for two hours, without a word, they dueled. The air was electric and the music exciting."
Wow. Can someone PLEASE build a time machine now? If only to go back and record that epic guitar duel between the two drunken masters and post it on YouTube for the rest of us to see, it would be worth it.
Oh and how does the story end? Well... you know that lyric from Something that goes:
Somewhere in her smile she knows
That I don't need no other lover
Apparently her smile doesn't know shit, because "A year later, Boyd left Harrison when she realized he was sleeping with Ringo Starr's wife. She wound up in Clapton's arms."
At first I was going to accuse Harrison of lyrical misrepresentation, but then I realized that he didn't actually lie. Check the lyric again: I don't need no other lover... I'll be damned! That cunning linguist tricked us all with a double negative! (If he doesn't need no other lover... that means that he does need an other lover... right?)
Moral of the story: It's time to stop guessing how much they love you and time to go back and check all your old love letters for grammatical loopholes before you find yourself in for some hard day's nights.
Author/Illustrator: David Shannon
David is a little rascal who just can't seem to stay out of trouble. Not only can he not stay out of trouble, but he appears to be possessed by the devil himself. Rather than pay for an expensive exorcism, the beleaguered mother can only muster a few frustrated "NO!"s as her son blazes a swath of devastation through the home.
As any parent knows, simply yelling NO! is not going to do the trick. Effective discipline requires patience, consistency... and a little bit of creativity. To get the ball rolling, perhaps David's mother should take some cues from the Thai police force. In a much publicized move, last week the police in Bangkok announced that any police officer violating department rules will be forced to wear a Hello Kitty armband.
From the NY Times: “This new twist is expected to make them feel guilt and shame and prevent them from repeating the offense, no matter how minor,” he said. “Kitty is a cute icon for young girls. It’s not something macho police officers want covering their biceps.”
While there are some grumblings about this policy perpetuating archaic gender stereotypes, there has been a noticeable decline in officer misconduct. So for now, the controversial new policy will stand. Hello Kitty, Goodbye Bad Behavior.
In fact, the policy has proven to be so effective that variations are being adopted by a number of countries and has even made it's way into a few local precincts here in the United States.
Left: Second Lieutenant Ignatius J. Reilly of the San Bernardino Police Department after he failed to submit his timesheet by the 5pm deadline.
Okay, so maybe this wouldn't be the best method of disciplining children. The point is, parenting in the 21st century is going to take some unconventional thinking. Blunt negative reinforcement is soo 20th century. If you want to turn your children into sparkling examples of good behavior, start thinking outside the box!
Though, if you have to think inside the box, do so literally. Go turn on that magic box in your living room, watch Supernanny, and let her prime time disciplinary techniques wash over you. There's nothing like tough love and a no nonsense British accent to tame unruly children. She's like a modern day Mary Poppins... if Mary Poppins were reincarnated as an eggplant. (She's good with kids and a great source of potassium!)
Oh eggplant, is there anything you can't do?
"Too many parents make life hard for their children by trying, too zealously, to make it easy for them."
German poet Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832), quoted in "The Case Against Adolescence" by Robert Epstein
I started Farm School two years ago in part because I blathered on for much too long on the subject of children and independence at L's blog Schola. Independence, self-reliance, and
We are all of us, especially the kids, aware of the shortening days (dark comes around nine now, instead of eleven), and that the first day of school is just about one month away. I'm trying to make the most of what's left of the summer, which is why I haven't been online much, except to order some school supplies and things for Laura's birthday later this month.
The country fair is always a
Author: Davide Cali
Illustrator: Eric Heliot
Piano Piano is an energetic story about a young boy (with an unhealthy addiction to hair gel) who is forced by his mother to practice piano so that he can grow up to be a grand pianist. Cali displays a quirky sense of humor and truly captures the emotional distress of being made to practice an instrument against your will. (As someone who once cried rather than practice Pachelbel's Canon, I can speak from experience.) It soon becomes obvious that the boy's mother is attempting to atone for her own childhood disappointments by forcing her son to succeed where she failed. Tsk, tsk.
Boundaries regarding parental control over their child has always been a difficult issue. In fact, it is at the heart of the debate surrounding one of the United States' most ignominious distinctions--according to UNICEF, there are only 2 countries that have not signed onto the Convention on the Rights of the Child: the United States and Somalia.
Somalia has not signed on because it does not have a recognized government. That's a decent excuse. This is not the case in the United States. Here in the good ol' U.S. of A. we recognize our government. We recognize it as a conglomeration of talking heads backed by the deep pockets of corporate interest and led by a condescending idiot... but we do recognize it.
It came as a surprise to me that one of the forces preventing the U.S. from ratifying this convention is a powerful opposition lobby that is afraid that the Convention will undermine the rights of the parents in the parent-child relationship.
Now, I haven't read the Convention thoroughly, so this may be oversimplifying things... but this is bulldoodoo. How is it possible that we are only country of note who refuses to sign this? And is there really an anti-child rights lobby?!
What we need is an outside voice of reason to straighten things out. In Piano Piano the wise grandfather steps in and acts as the calming force that leads the family towards a common sense resolution. Who can the United States turn to help it come to its senses?
Nelson Mandela and the Council of Elders, that's who!
I just read about this in the Washington Post the other day and have been giddy ever since. Nelson Mandela has been holding meetings on a remote, privately-owned island to form a group of retired global leaders who will be able to tackle world problems unfettered by the burden of national or international politics.
The international council will be chaired by Archbishop Desmond Tutu and will include such stalwarts as former U.S. president Jimmy Carter, former UN secretary general Kofi Annan, women's rights champion Ela Bhatt, longtime children's rights advocate (and Mandela's wife) Graca Machel; and Microcredit Superstar/Nobel Peace Prize winner Muhammad Yunus, among others.
How freakin' cool is that? It sounds like something straight out of a comic book... like the Justice League on Metamucil. To make it even more like a comic book, the council is funded by an eccentric egomaniacal billionaire (Richard Branson). This leaves the door open for a plot twist where Branson turns out to be an evil genius who is using the Council of Elders as part of his twisted plan to take over the world.
"Can the Council of Elders foil Branson's evil plan before it's too late? Tune in next week when the Dalai Llama and the ghost of Mother Teresa attempt to rescue the Elders, who are being held hostage in Branson's secret island lair!"
Whatever happens, there is no denying that the world just seems cooler and more epic now that there is something called the Council of Elders in existence. Even if all they do is hang around playing shuffleboard and watching reruns of Matlock, it still sounds cool as hell.
Though, if they knew what was good for them, Matlock would already be on the Council... along with the Wonder Twins: Amma the Hugging Saint and the elder statesman of hip-hop, Chuck D.
Note from Mandela: If Flava Flav calls to ask about his seat on the council, tell him his invitation must have been, umm... lost in the mail. Sorry Foofy Foofy, there's just no room left... now go back to your love nest at Vh-1 headquarters, you silly silly peanut man.
Author/Illustrator: Jonathan Allen
"I'm Not Cute" is a charmingly simple tale that also serves as a diagnosis of an unfortunate symptom of the life of a child television or movie star. As with many child stars, the baby owl struggles to convince the public that is not just a cute face. This is what is commonly known as the "I'm Note Cute!" Syndrome. There are several possible paths open to the baby owl. Below are the historically most likely scenarios.
Scenario 1: Never manage to break the suffocating mold of childhood fame and eventually disappear into the misty hills of obscurity.
Exhibit A: Jonathan Taylor Thomas
Sorry, Simba. The Circle of Life for a child star is painfully unforgiving.
Scenario 2: Burn out in a blaze of glory, never to fully recover.
Exhibit B: Corey Feldman
Last spotted on VH-1s The Surreal Life. It doesn't get any lower.
Scenario 3: Temporarily fade from the limelight only to reemerge and go on to have a successful career as an adult.
Exhibit C: Alyssa Milano
a.k.a. The boyhood crush that keeps on giving.
Scenario 4: Manage to survive the spectacular flame-out, and then (after years of rehab) rise from the ashes to reclaim stardom with a vengeance.
Exhibit D: Drew Barrymore
Went from snorting cocaine at 13 to Ambassador Against Hunger for the United Nations World Food Programme at 31. Not bad.
While Barrymore's recent nomination as U.N. Ambassador is impressive, she is not the first child star to succeed in the political realm. That distinction belongs to the mother of all child stars: Shirley Temple Black, who went from a life as an international childhood sensation to a distinguished career in international politics.
From the Good Ship Lollipop...
... to serving as the U.S. Ambassador to Czechoslovakia during the Velvet Revolution (which, by the way, was hands down the coolest name for a revolution ever).
As these stars prove, the "I'm Not Cute" Syndrome is not fatal... but it is life-threatening and can have crippling long term side effects if you're not careful. So if hear "cha-ching!" everytime you look at your adorable offspring, just take a minute and consider the tragic fate of the kids from Different Strokes... that should at least slow down the money train long enough for you to jump off before it's too late.
What are we talkin' bout, Willis? We're talking about the exploitation of children leading to irreparable psychological damage with sometimes tragic consequences, that's what we're talkin' bout.
Tricky Dicks Note: (Warning--juvenile and crass pun ahead.)
Slate just featured an article about recently released Nixon documents. Within those documents, there was a memo revealing that our former president dealt with the opposite of the "I'm Not Cute" Syndrome. He struggled with what doctors refer to as the "I'm Not a Cold and Heartless Bastard" Syndrome. You can read the article and the original memo here, but here's a taste:
Nixon complained that "average voters" regarded RN as "an efficient, crafty, cold, machine." To help correct this common misconception, Nixon cited "warm items" (Page 3) such as "the calls that I make to people when they are sick, even though they no longer mean anything to anybody" (Page 4). "I called some mothers and wives of men that had been killed in Vietnam," he added, helpfully.
Because he was Nixon, he resented somewhat the social imperative that the president be courteous. "[W]e have gone far beyond any previous president … in breaking our backs to be nicey-nice to the Cabinet, staff and the Congress … around Christmastime," Nixon groused (Page 3). "I have treated them like dignified human beings and not like dirt under my feet" (Page 4), he continued.
Ahh... there's nothing like an efficiently calculating memorandum to your staffers to help convince the American public that you aren't efficient or calculating. Now, I just can't wait until three decades down the road when we finally get to see some of Vice President Dick Cheney's secret files (if they still exist).
Just think, given all the ridiculousness that's been coming out about the ultra-secretive Vice President's office lately... if that's the stuff we do get to see, just imagine what bizarre and delicious treats he's hiding from us in those unmarked drawers and file cabinets!
Word is that Comedy Central is already planning to bring John Stewart and Stephen Colbert out of retirement for just that occasion. The special will be called:
The Daily Show Reunion Special 2037
Inside Cheney's Drawers: The Dick We Never Knew
If you have TiVo... set it now.
Author/Illustrator: James Warhola
The story of Andy Warhol's down-to-earth country family is written by (and from the boyhood perspective of) Warhol's real-life nephew: James Warhola. (Andy dropped the "a" in his last name after graduating from college.) What at first appears to be a charming if somewhat pedestrian book becomes much more significant when considered in the broader context of modern art.
Part of Andy Warhol's genius lay in his ability to transform the mundane into an artistic statement. His most recognizable piece, the Campbell's Soup Can, took a common household item and elevated it to high art. Through Warhol's lens, the ordinary became extraordinary.
Left: Art or Lunch? Genius... or Delicious?
Ironically, in the process of revealing the artistry of daily humanity, Warhol dehumanizes himself. In the public sphere, Andy Warhol becomes an abstract concept, a wispy alien life form floating through the New York art scene, brilliant but not quite human.
With Uncle Andy's, James Warhola brings his uncle back to earth. His appealing book presents an Andy Warhol that we can relate to, which is an amazing achievement. Warhola manages to re-humanize his famous uncle, rescuing him from a bleak eternity of pop culture abstraction. In Uncle Andy's Warhol becomes what we never saw... a man with a family, a goofy uncle... a man who lived with his mother in a house full of cats.
It's questionable whether Andy Warhol would have appreciated his nephew's efforts to demystify his persona (the other-worldly public image may have been a carefully crafted artistic statement in itself). However, to some, the revelations in Uncle Andy's make Andy Warhol's work more significant--at the very least, it is an interesting chapter in pop culture history. While Andy Warhol brilliantly revealed the beauty inherent in the mundane, Warhola beautifully reveals the inherent humanity in the brilliant artist. Talk about avant garde!
Author/Illustrator: Alexandra Day
Considered a modern classic, this is the story of a mother who goes out to run some errands and leaves her baby in the care of the dog, Carl. While she is out, Carl and the baby have all kinds of forbidden fun, like sliding down laundry chutes, swimming in the fish tank, and eating junk food. Carl then bathes the baby and puts it back to crib and the mom is none the wiser.
Good natured fun? We'll see who's laughing when Child Protective Services comes knocking at the door. I mean, honestly, who leaves their baby's life in the hands of a rottweiller? I don't care how "good" he is, he doesn't have opposable thumbs!
Alternate (Jaded, Pessimistic) Interpretations of Good Dog, Carl
The Cool Uncle Carl Interpretation: Carl is like the fun uncle who doesn't have to shoulder any of the responsibilities of child-rearing, but gets to come in and spoil the child with his free-wheeling and anti-establishment ways. This curries favor with the child while simultaneously undermining the parents' authority. It all starts innocently enough with laundry chute adventures and junk food... but by the time the baby grows to be a teenager, don't be surprised to find Good Ol' Carl buying the kid cigarettes and beer behind the parents' backs.
The Lady and the Tramp Interpretation: Carl misses being the center of attention. Before the baby came along, he was the apple of this family's eye. Now he is merely a supporting cast member, with the baby taking the lead. Desperate to regain the spotlight, Carl decides that he must eliminate the competition. Left alone, he throws the baby down the laundry chute and into the basement, tries to drown it in the fish tank, and even attempts to poison it with obscene amounts of junk food. Fortunately for the family, Carl does not have the fine-tuned skills of a highly trained assassin (again, no thumbs). His attempts are woefully unsuccessful. Knowing that the mother will be home at any minute, he quickly washes the baby, wiping off any fingerprints and destroying all evidence of wrong-doing. The mother doesn't suspect a thing. Perfect. Now all Carl needs is patience as he plots his next move and waits for the family to turn its back... so he can get rid of that damn baby once and for all.
o Stephanie at Throwing Marshmallows has a terrific post about Feminism and Homeschooling.
o David Harsanyi of The Denver Post writes that Adults, not boys, have changed. Just a sampling:
What makes The Dangerous Book for Boys somewhat contentious, though, is its implicit assertion that boys and girls are very different. That boys and girls are interested in different things and, gulp,
The following comment gave me an idea:
Liz said...
What? This book is more like a slasher film in the sense that it gives me nightmares. I don't care how much my mother loves me, the day she shows up at my window with a ladder is the day i have her declared incompetent and put her in the home.
Love You Forever as a slasher film? Brilliant! In the extended film version, once the mother passes away, the son goes off the deep end. Unable to live in a world without his mother, he leaves his family, moves to the countryside, and opens up a roadside motel. The son's name? Norman Bates. The deranged Bates mans the front desk with a smile, but in private he wears his mother's clothes and softly sings to himself,
"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
as long as I'm living
my baby you'll be."
The more I think about it, the more I think this movie must be made. Love You Forever naturally lends itself to a merger with Hitchcock's Psycho. Is it inevitable that Munsch's young boy raised by a bizarre mother turns into cross-dressing murderer? No. Would it surprise you if he did? Double No.
The director of this film would naturally be Todd Solondz, who specializes in dysfunctional families and giving people the creeps. (If you don't know what I mean, watch Happiness... possibly the most unsettling movie I've ever seen.)
Note: While I recognize the creepiness of Love You Forever, I still stand by my original assertion that it is a tear jerker. As is Psycho (he loved his mother so much!)... so if you go to see Love You Forever: The Movie, you better bring a box of tissues with you.
Sundance, here we come!
A couple of months ago, after seeing the Macleans magazine cover story about "dressing our daughters like skanks", I wrote, What continues to surprise me is how many mothers around here, and remember, I'm far away from liberal east coast urban types, so your experience may be wide of my mark, are the ones who choose to pimp put their daughters in (often matching) stripper chic not because it's
From today's New York Times, "Posing as a Family, Sex Offenders Stun a Town" (as usual, all italics and bold mine, all mine):
EL MIRAGE, Ariz., Jan. 31 — To neighbors, Casey Price was a seventh grader with acne and a baseball cap who lived an unremarkable life among a bevy of male relatives.
He built the occasional skateboard ramp and did wheelies on his bicycle down the streets of this
Sounds like quite an experience. You made me feel like I was there too.
There's nothing like Indian food, is there?
I've never been to India, but from everything I've ever seen or heard about it, it's a world of it's own.
Theresa, I'm glad you felt that way. I love sharing India. There is more tto come.
Richard, you are so right. It's another world, but after a few days it feels like the only world. No doubt due to the hospitality India is famous for.
I am absolutely loving your posts about India. With speak with such warmth and appreciation about this beautiful diverse culture and land.
You are not a Brahmin, but in what category would you fall, Elizabeth?
Joanna, I'm glad you are enjoying the posts. As for the category in which I would fall: spiritual but not formally attending any church, a blend of Christian with a strong Hindu leaning. (Gandhi found them compatible; so do I.)
I've never seen a cuckoo and that coffee looks AMAZING! These posts have been so wonderful. :)
I've never had South Indian coffee. It sounds fabulous. So glad you had fun!
Looks like you had a great time in Chennai. Did you have a typical south Indian tiffin( breakfast) complete with piping hot filter coffee.
Wow! That sounds amazing! I'm loving the bird call. I really want to visit there someday. It sounds just wonderful!
Hi, Lydia & Alleged, yes, the coffee is fabulous. No other way to describe it. It's strong, though.
Hi, Rachna, yes we always have a typical tiffin with coffee made just that way. Yum. When we came home, the first thing I did was make a batch of idlis.
J.A., yes, that birdcall gets me every time. It's a sound I've just never heard except there. It's so different from the cuckoo clock cuckoo.
I'm curious about that coffee drinking technique.
Ah, Mark, it's hard to explain. They tilt their head, raise the cup above their lips, tilt the cup, and the coffee flows, waterfall style, but neatly, right into their mouths. In my case it flowed, not so neatly, all over my blouse.
Lovely post and lovely people. Sounds like a grand time.
It would be so nice to travel and broaden my horizons. Thanks for sharing your journey with us! :)
I suspect with much practise one would acquire the coffee drinking skill, providing that is, you´re not too burnt or too wet. By the way is the coffee hot or lukewarm?
I have seen here where wine is drunk from a bag( I shall look up the exact name) and again if performed correctly looks impressive. Not quite the same if the wine ends up everywhere but the mouth!
David, believe it or not, I used to feel I never wanted to travel. We moved a lot when I was a kid, so that's probably why. But it only took one trip to another land, and I was hooked. And it really has broadened my horizons, as you said.
Terri, the coffee is HOT. But you are right, practice would make perfect, etc. I'd like to see wine drunk from a bag. Maybe the next time we are in Spain.