By Nick Cross
To the uninitiated, writing appears to be a simple process of putting words onto the page. But the fact that I’ve re-written the sentence you’ve just read six times seems to indicate that perhaps it’s not that easy. To write well requires us to make a deep personal connection with the material, and this is where the trouble starts.
Ernest Hemingway famously said:
“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”
A trifle melodramatic, you might think, and just imagine the mess it caused to the internal workings of his typewriter! But we understand exactly what he meant. And there’s another use of the word “bleed” that is even more pertinent to the writing experience – the way that our daily experiences, ideas and emotions bleed into our work. Writing is not an activity that respects boundaries, in fact it actively thrives on recycling our happiest and saddest moments, tapping into our deepest fears and exposing our most shameful thoughts.
This might all be fine if the transfer was only one way. But the process of writing, editing and getting published generates a whole host of other emotions which can, in turn, affect our lives away from the desk. Often, we may not realise that we’re building a psychological house of cards, until the sudden, brutal event comes that causes it all to collapse. Life
happens.
For me, the trigger event was the simple failure of my novel to find a publisher (something I covered in detail in
my earlier Slushpile post). For others, it can be something far worse. In
Cliff McNish’s post from June this year, he talks movingly about the death of his wife and how he found himself unable to write the ghost story his publisher wanted:
“Day after day I wrote less and less until finally ... I just stopped. I didn’t want to be in this dark place. I had enough darkness going on in my life.”
Cliff, I’m pleased to say, found a way out of the darkness and is back to writing books again. And so am I, for that matter. But what is it that allows us to see past shattering events and gradually bring our lives back onto an even keel? Psychologists call this trait “resilience” and the American Psychological Association (APA) defines it as follows:
Resilience is the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats or significant sources of stress — such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems or workplace and financial stressors. It means "bouncing back" from difficult experiences.
Building resilience is a core skill for writers, but something that’s often overlooked. The APA have
an excellent factsheet about building resilience, and here (very briefly) are their 10 tips:
- Make connections
- Avoid seeing crises as insurmountable problems
- Accept that change is a part of living
- Move toward your goals
- Take decisive actions
- Look for opportunities for self-discovery
- Nurture a positive view of yourself
- Keep things in perspective
- Maintain a hopeful outlook
- Take care of yourself
The factsheet is very good, and I suggest you read it so I won’t have to regurgitate any more of the information here! Instead, I’d like to share some personal strategies that have worked for me, in the hope that they’ll prove useful.
Write what you want – not what you think you should
You may think you’re writing what you want to, but are you? External pressures such as market trends, agent feedback or peer pressure can subtly affect what projects you choose to pursue. And there’s also the element of “doing what you’ve always done.” We’ve seen that already in Cliff McNish’s piece, and I was struck by
another recent post by Sarah Aronson where she talks about changing writing direction to find peace of mind (and also success!)
Like Cliff and Sarah, I found that writing dark, difficult books worsened my mental condition, which in turn made my writing worse. So I decided to change direction and write lighter, funnier stuff instead. I wouldn’t say it’s been easier exactly (I still find writing pretty hard work), but it’s allowed me to tap into the positive, and make myself laugh into the bargain.
“What about the cathartic effect of writing?” I hear you say. Well, I agree that you can use writing as a form of therapy, and I think that’s why my short stories have been getting darker in the meantime (You can
read more about the process behind that). Short stories are perfect for me because the process is much, much shorter than writing a novel – I can get the darkness out of my brain and onto the page without wallowing in it.
 |
| The darkest of my recent stories |
“Too much of anything can make you sick.”
I’d love to attribute that quote to a great philosopher, but in fact it’s the opening line of Cheryl Cole’s debut single
Fight for this Love! Nevertheless, the sentiment holds true, linking nicely into my previous point.
Doing everything in moderation is important to both mental and physical health. It’s tempting to lock yourself in a room for eight hours and burn through as many words as possible, but it’s not a healthy long term approach. Varying when, how and what you write can help you work around external pressures and will probably improve your creativity too.
Worry about Your Worrying
Writers are great worriers. This can be a positive trait, because it allows us to catastrophise, imagining all of the worst things that can go wrong in any situation and make sure they happen to our characters! But the same overactive mental process that allows us to plot stories can manifest in other situations as worry and rumination. Here’s a quick definition if the latter term is unfamiliar:
Rumination is the compulsively focused attention on the symptoms of one's distress, and on its possible causes and consequences, as opposed to its solutions.
Rumination is believed by psychology practitioners to be
a leading factor in depression and anxiety. It’s a big risk for people who are naturally introspective and spend a lot of time inside their own heads. Er, that’s us, people.
Cognitive Behavioural Treatment (CBT) is a common way of handling negative thought patterns. I’ve had a fair bit of CBT treatment over the past five years, but it’s only in the last six months that it’s really started to stick. Your mileage will doubtless vary, and there are other treatments that may work better for you instead. See the resources section at the end for more details.
Don’t be an emotional sponge
The world is full of awful events, which – while being horrible, immoral and upsetting – don’t tend to touch our lives directly. So we experience them at a distance via news and social media, sending out our empathy in place of direct experience. This is (once again) a double-edged sword, because the process which allows us to write convincing characters by stepping into their shoes, also allows us to be very quickly overwhelmed by other’s woes.
When I was at my lowest ebb, I can remember sitting on Twitter and feeling that I was being crushed by other people’s sadness – here was someone going through a divorce, or coping with sick kids, or lamenting a parent who died years ago. I had lost perspective of the positive posts, sucking up the painful and the negative emotions like a sponge.
The simple solution for me, was to take a break from Facebook and Twitter and BBC News, to insulate myself from the grief of the world until I was strong enough to face it again.
Beware the end-of-project blues
These are a big issue for me – after the wave of euphoria and relief that a big project has been completed, I will invariably sink into a period of low mood. The Friday before last, we delivered a brand new website at work, after an incredibly ambitious and stressful ten week schedule. As the first step in a projected ten year programme, the site was an unqualified success, and I had every reason to feel extremely proud of my contribution. But instead, I mooched around the house throughout the bank holiday weekend, feeling sorry for myself.
Writing projects are no different, and the stresses can be much worse because the completion of a final draft is invariably followed by submission to agents and editors, which creates its own anxieties. I know that other writers advise you to always have more than one book on the go, so that you can immediately switch to the other one. But I find I work best in intensive bursts, which doesn’t always suit that manner of working.
I remember reading about
fashion designer Alexander McQueen’s suicide, which was triggered, in part, by reaching the end of a fashion project. As McQueen’s psychiatrist told the inquest into his death:
“Usually after a show he felt a huge come-down. He felt isolated, it gave him a huge low.”
Try to plan for the end-of-project blues and have a strategy to cope with them – this may be as simple as allowing yourself not to feel guilty about the low that inevitably follows a high. Although your body and mind will need a rest after an intensive period of work, try to ramp down slowly and structure your downtime.
Build a Support Network
Everyone needs supportive friends and family to celebrate the good times and get them through the bad. Build and nurture your support network by finding like-minded people to share your journey (hello SCBWI!) If you have mental health problems and seek out a community of fellow sufferers, be vigilant to the difference between supportive friends and ones who can become a burden or project their own woes onto you (the emotional sponge problem).
Additional Resources
Living Life to the Full
This is a
free self-help website set up by a Scottish psychiatrist and partly-funded by the NHS. It offers a range of online CBT courses and factsheets to address problems such as anxiety, depression, low self-esteem and addiction.
NHS Choices
This site has lots of
mental health advice, including the
Moodzone which focuses on stress, anxiety and depression.
Manage Your Mind
This
bestselling book by Gillian Butler and Tony Hope is a very approachable and comprehensive guide to mental fitness. At 500 pages, its size can be a little off-putting, and I was scared of reading it for years! But once I finally opened it, I found it both comforting and useful. (full disclosure – my employer publishes this book, but that’s also one of the reasons it’s so good!)
Therapy and Counselling
There are lots of websites and directories of therapists/counsellors, and the choice can be confusing as there are many different types of therapy available. Always look for someone with accreditation – the more reputable sites will show you this information (for instance,
It’s Good to Talk is a directory of practitioners who are accredited by The British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy). Always “try before you buy” - the practitioner-patient relationship needs to work in both directions to be effective, and good therapists will offer you a free trial session before you commit to regular meetings.
As well as private therapy, I have had counselling on the NHS in the past, although mental health services have been hit very hard by recent government spending cuts and you may struggle to get a referral unless your condition is serious.
Life Coaching
Life coaching is not an alternative to psychotherapy but more of a complement – it won’t help you with deep-seated psychological conditions, but is useful for addressing issues such as confidence, motivation and reaching your career goals. I’ve recently had a course of sessions with a life coach and found it immensely helpful (if pretty expensive). In fact, the confidence it’s given me is pretty much the reason I’m writing this blog post.
Although she wasn’t my life coach, I’d like to give a shout out here to the lovely Bekki Hill, who runs a website called
The Creativity Cauldron and specialises in coaching writers through their creative troubles.
OK, I think that’s quite enough from me! I hope you’ve found this post both useful and enjoyable. The issue of mental health for creative people is one that doesn’t get enough focus, so I hope I’ve redressed the balance a little.
Stay resilient,
Nick.
Nick Cross is a children's writer, Undiscovered Voices winner and Blog Network Editor for
SCBWI Words & Pictures Magazine.
Nick's writing is published in
Stew Magazine, and he's recently received the
SCBWI Magazine Merit Award, for his short story
The Last Typewriter.
This year’s NE-SCBWI Conference (my sixth) was different for me. As the On-the-Spot Critique Coordinator, I was one of numerous volunteers responsible for making a successful conference. In my position, I felt deeply obligated to the attendees, wanting to facilitate proper connections to editors/agents, and I’d promised these same professionals that I’d do my best to secure them additional critiques. In truth, I was scared. Since becoming the On-the-Spot Critique Coordinator less than a month ago, I have secretly fretted, while my daily early-morning writing time turned into early-morning e-mail communication, chart-making, and teaching myself how to make a spreadsheet. (I am also a committee co-chair for the upcoming New Jersey SCBWI Conference.) My manuscripts lay untouched; my muse went on strike.
Preparing for the conference reminded me of my earlier years in the business of writing for children, when I was unsure and questioned my abilities. Self-doubt hinders your growth as an artist. So I stopped thinking about What Might Not Happen (that the on-the-spot critiques would be a failure) and I began to believe that I could, indeed, pull this off. But to do this, I had to call on my Inspired Frame-of-Mind, which is strong, determined, and follows the muse with much delight, like a kitten chasing an unraveling ball of red yarn. I write what my characters tell me, and on some level, believe they are the ones shaping their stories, not me. I continue to struggle with writing for my blog, for that voice comes from a different place, where self-criticism has rented a tiny room and ignores my weekly eviction notice.
So in my Inspired Frame-of-Mind, I faced the task of being a successful conference coordinator: I worked diligently and focused on being positive, while doing everything possible to sell these critiques. The bar to succeed is set high due to the tireless efforts of our region’s longtime coordinators, who have given so much of their time over the years: Marilyn Salerno, Joyce Shor Johnson, Kathryn Hulick, Melissa Hed. Valarie Giogas. Laura Pauling. Melissa Stewart. Casey Girard. Betty Brown. Sally Riley. Jean Woodbury. Linda Brennan. Jennifer Carson. Joannie Duris. Anna Boll. Jennifer O’Keefe. Greg Fishbone. Francine Puckly. Margo Lemieux. And Shirley Pearson, who I hope can one day step out from behind the registration table to pursue her own dreams. I apologize in advance for not listing every name, though my gratitude is intended for all. Thank you! The NE-SCBWI Conference reflects your efforts, selfless dedication, and enthusiasm for our wonderful community. A community filled
Beyond Lucky by Sarah AronsonReview by Chris Singer
About the author:
Sarah AronsonHead Case
(Roaring Brook Press 2007), was named a 2008 Quick Pick for Reluctant Readers. Sarah Aronson lives in Hanover, New Hampshire, with her family.
About the book:
It’s not exactly that Ari Fish is obsessive compulsive. It’s just that he believes in luck. That’s why he recites American presidents (in order), always showers with his left hand, and talks to his poster of Wayne Timcoe (the greatest goalkeeper ever to graduate from Somerset Valley High) before he goes on to the soccer pitch. Thomas Jefferson may have said that luck is all a matter of hard work, but Ari knows that sometimes luck is… luck. And to win at soccer you need it.
When Ari finds a rare Wayne Timcoe trading card, he knows his luck has changed. Now he’s going to start in the net. Mac MacDonald will learn to play nicely with Parker Llewellyn, the only girl on the team. And Ari’s fire-fighter brother will come home safely. Right? But then Ari’s Timcoe card disappears. With his luck finally run out, what can Ari put in its place?
My take on the book:
I continue to be blown away by the fantastic middle readers I’ve come across since taking over Book Dads in April 2010. In just the last few weeks alone, I’ve read a few from cover to cover. Sarah Aronson’s Beyond Lucky was one such book I couldn’t stop reading until I was finished.
Beyond Lucky isn’t your typical middle reader sports novel. Like other novels in this genre, you aren’t going to easily predict the outcome either. While the on-the-field action is fun and exciting, this novel is truly driven by riveting plots and story lines. The development of the main characters is really well done, and readers will feel good about how Ari grows by the end of the story.This is a must-read in my opinion and you don’t need to be a soccer fan to enjoy this book. I highly recommend sharing this book with a middle reader in your life. In the meantime, check out
All this week, as we have welcomed and introduced Gretchen, in the back of my mind, I couldn't help thinking:
I hope this isn't hard for her.
As nice and welcoming and sweet as all of us Tollboothers are, it is never easy to join a group, to become part of something bigger, especially if it is already up and running.
Why is that?
Is it because when we are solo, we get to make all the decisions?
Is it because a group has an energy and force of its own--that sometimes you cannot predict?
Is it because we all have something at stake? Friendship? Books? Reputation?
We writers often claim to be solitary folk. We are shy. We don't always like conflict (even though we do nothing but write about it!!!) We say we don't like going out on a limb in public, even though, when our books go out into the world, that's exactly what we do!!! One of the funniest but meaningful things anyone ever told me: Sending out your manuscript is like going on a blind date....naked.
So why do we do it?
Why do we join crit groups, join blog teams, get together for retreats and seminars?
Obviously, we need each other. No book gets written alone. This universe is a whole lot easier when you have a group of writing buddies to celebrate, cry, stomp their feet, and chat with you! Maybe we are not so shy!!!
Maybe we are like penguins!!!
(Remember the penguin movie????)
Q of the Day: What is a penguin who thinks they know a better way, who goes off on his own across the ice, away from the group?
(Squeamish writers cover your eyes!!!)
Answer: it's a dead penguin!
We writers know this!!! Together we are better writers. We have more fun. We are more successful!
So from one penguin to another....
WELCOME GRETCHEN!!!
WELCOME TO THE TOLLBOOTH!!!
We are delighted to have you! You make us stronger and more interesting.
Note: I did have a few questions for Gretchen, most of which have been answered. But not this one. This is a question I always want to ask, but no one has answered with quite this much humor! (And I like that!)
Q: Gretchen, when you were little, did you stay in the lines????
A: Unfortunately, yes. And unfortunately, I still do. I'm no Raschka.
(And I am no John Irving!!!)
Thanks Gretchen!!! Again....
-Sarah Aronson
Good morning!
Special thanks to Sarah Johnson for taking us to the Bologna Book Fair last week. I think I can speak for Sarah Sullivan and really...all Sarahs everywhere, when I say that next year, all the Tollbooth Sarahs should go!
For this week....
I'm going to put on a hat I haven't worn since I started writing seriously: physical therapist.
For ten years, I was a licensed PT and for years before that, a certified trainer. While a PT, I mostly worked with people with neurological injuries: traumatic brain injuries, spinal cord injuries, and strokes. But for a short stint, I did an orthopedic rotation. During that time, I worked with many, many people with repetitive motion injuries sustained at work.
A REPETITIVE MOTION INJURY is an injury to a part of the body that is caused by performing the same motion over and over again, thereby straining the body part.
STRAIN occurs when the body part is called on to work harder, stretch farther, impact more directly or otherwise function at a greater level then it is prepared for. The immediate impact may be minute, but when it occurs repeatedly the constant straining WILL cause damage.
And PAIN.
EVERY YEAR, many people who work primarily on computers suffer from these injuries. Like when we are on deadline. Or on a creative roll. The most common problems are tendinitis and carpal tunnel syndrome, but writers also often experience neck and back problems.
And PAIN.
There is nothing that stops the writing process more than PAIN.
Now...You would think a writer who had been a PT would be able to avoid injuries like this, but you would be wrong.
Here is me BEFORE my work station evaluation:
It's terrible. My laptop keyboard is significantly above elbow height, even with a raised chair. I sit with my head forward. (Look at that neck!!) Think about the strain on my wrists to work on the high key board!
BAD WRITER!!!!
But I have to be HONEST: When I am teaching and drafting and not paying attention to my work station, this is what I look like. This is why I experience PAIN.
And once I am in the pain cycle, writing is...well....a pain.
Seriously, if you are one of the lucky writers who has never experienced back pain, let me assure you: it stops the writing process. My ergonomic assessment has really helped. Since I got help, no more pain!
So STAY TUNED!
This week, I will provide work station basics.
Do's and Don'ts.
Strategies to STOP the pain and avoid getting injured again.
For now...here is my tip of the day:
TAKE BREAKS from
Beyond Lucky by Sarah Aronson
Thank you for all of your hard work, Betsy! Beautiful post, as always.
Jo
What a wonderful recap! It is a great reminder of the weekend we just came from. Thank you Betsy for all of your hard work and sharing your experience. It was a pleasure to meet you, I hope we can chat more at a future conference!
I enjoyed your blog voice. I felt right along with you, planning a conference is nerve wracking but, we did it!
Thanks, Casey, for all your hard work! I look forward to seeing you again! The conference could not have happened without you. Betsy
You are too sweet, Jo. Your comments always make my day! Betsy
My pleasure, Joyce! You are an inspiration with everything you do. I appreciate your warm welcome, and I look forward to working with you again next year! NE-SCBWI is lucky to have you. Betsy
Great post, Betsy! Now we all go back to work…inspired and rejuvenated!!
xo sarah
Thanks to you, Sarah, I have new revision tools. Your novel academy rocked! (I will work on your post in a few days.) xo Betsy
Betsy, it sounds like you had a fantastic time and did a REALLY good job as the On-the-Spot Critique Coordinator
You’re such a talented person, good-hearted person—an inspiration in many ways. Thanks for sharing and I look forward to our time together, too 
And although I enjoyed EVERY word you said here, I have to tell you, this metaphor is priceless!…”for that voice comes from a different place, where self-criticism has rented a tiny room and ignores my weekly eviction notice.” Great writer, you are
Betsy, you were amazing at your job as on-the-spot critique coordinator. And this is a beautifully written blog that reminds us all of the conference inspiration that could be felt throughout the halls and rooms of the Sheraton. We need only go back to your blog when moments of doubt creep in.
Betsy–what a wonderful post! I wish we’d had a chance to talk more–I hadn’t realized you were in Novel Academy with me! Of course, by Sunday my brain was completely overloaded. Thanks for putting into words the things so many of us feel about NESCBWI. Good luck with your conference in NJ!
Thank you for this wonderful recap. It is so reassuring to read about your emotional ups and downs and know I’m not alone. I agree, the conference was a big “UP”!
Thanks, Joyce, for all your support and encouragement!! It was my pleasure!
Thank you, Donna! You are too sweet. I look forward to our weekend together in June! Betsy
What lovely words, Carol. I hope you made good connections at the conference. Nice to chat with you! Betsy
My brain was overloaded too. And thank you for your kind words! Novel Academy was awesome! Betsy
No, Nancy, you are not alone. Remember this. Keep the faith, and keep writing. Hugs, Betsy