INTERMISSION
SCENE: WOMEN'S WASHROOM IN THEATRE
AT RISE: FEMALES LINE UP TO USE BATHROOM
FEMALE 1
Line is really long...hope we have enough time
FEMALE 2
(turning around)
Sorry?
FEMALE 1
I was just commenting that there's a lot of women waiting to get in and only a 15 minute intermission
FEMALE 2
When 'ya gotta go - 'ya gotta go, right?
FEMALE 1
(moving anxiously from foot to foot)
Don't I know it - and I really have to! Go, I mean
FEMALE 2
It usually picks up and moves faster when they near the end of the intermission
FEMALE 1
Hope so... Do you notice how the guys seem to be able to do what they have to do in three minutes?
FEMALE 2
That's cause they don't have as much clothing to remove and don't stare at the mirror or fix their makeup
FEMALE 1
Once in dire desperation, I used the men's washroom. I had to. I pushed the door open, screamed 'is anybody there 'cause I'm coming in!'
FEMALE 2
What happened?
FEMALE 1
I held my head down and didn't dare glance at the urinals. Went in a cubicle, slammed the door and never urinated so fast in my life! Thank goodness there was nobody in there, as far as I knowThe line is moving but barely. C'mon people - move quicker!
FEMALE 3
(behind both of them)
Don't mean to interrupt but there's another bathroom located downstairs. Everyone seems to gravitate to this one for one reason or another
FEMALE 1
Thanks for the suggestion but if I'll lose my place if I check it out and I don't know if it's an improvement on this.
(ASIDE TO FEMALE 2) Perhaps if you would hold my place...?
FEMALE 2
Don't think that's a good idea. If you end up returning, they'll attack me figuring you're trying to cut in the line. You have to decide which is the better option
FEMALE 1
All I know is that I really gotta pee!
FEMALE 2
Even if I let you in front of me, it's not much of an improvement
FEMALE 1
It's better than nothing and I would be most appreciative. Things are really getting desperate!
FEMALE 2
I suppose I could...I mean, I've been where you have....
FEMALE 1
Oh thank you, thank you!
(FEMALE 1 moves in front of FEMALE 2)
(CONT'D. FEMALE 1) Almost there...just a few more to go...
(moving back and forth from foot-to-foot)
FEMALE 1
(to female in front of her)
'...such a long line up...oh dear and intermission is almost over... Really, really, have to go...you would do that for me? You're too kind...thank you...'
(FEMALE 1 moves up the line)
FEMALE 1
(to herself)
A person has'ta do what a person has'ta do...the flush of victory is at hand...
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