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Revision Notes: Writing Stronger
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1. I Want to Write a Children’s Book and Get it Published!

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If you’ve been writing or illustrating chidlren’s books (picture books or novels) for long, you’ll hear this comment and question: I’ve got a great idea for a children’s book. How can I get it published? Here’s some answers to get you started.

Write a Great Book

The first thing to do is write a great book. OK, you say. That’s easy.

Is it?

When you fail at the rest of the stuff below and decide to circle back around to this one, here are some resources.

Another big hint: Spend a couple hours in a bookstore studying current children’s books. Read 100 children’s books this month, making sure the copyright is within the last year or so. After that immersion in the current children’s publishing market, do you still think your story stacks up? Great. Move on.

Picture book author Mem Fox comments on the difficulty of writing a chidlren's picture book. | DarcyPattison.com

Get the Great Book Published

Now that you have your Great Book, let’s talk about how to get it published.

Ah, this is where most people want me to wave a magic wand. Unfortunately, I can’t. Children’s publishing is an industry like any other, with its own best practices, fads that come and go, and a network of professionals who look askance at outsiders.

To break into the publishing world, you need to send your Great Book to someone for evaluation. This could be a publishing house or an agent.

The manuscript must be in standard manuscript format, and you’ll usually want a killer of a query letter.

Then comes the big question: WHERE do you send Great Book?
The annual Children’s Writers and Illustrator’s Market (CWIM) is like a big telephone directory of children’s publishers. It lists contact information, what types of books this company publishes and specific information on how to contact them. The CWIM also lists agents who represent children’s books, so you’ll want to study those listings, too. For members, the SCBWI also has listings of publishers and agents that are helpful.

Unfortunately, I can’t tell you where to send YOUR mss. You’ll have to study the market and find the best fit for you and your story. There are five mega-publishing houses, but each has multiple imprints that often operate as a separate company in many ways. For editorial purposes, you can usually submit to each imprint. So, would you be happier with one of the mega-publishers or a small, local or independent publisher? Does your book have widespread appeal for the bookstore (or trade) market? Or do you anticipate a niche market audience, such as 2nd grade teachers? Are you only writing for a religious market or an education market? Who is your audience and where would you expect them to buy this book?

In other words, there’s no free ride on this question. You must research your options and the best I can do is to say get started. Use the market guies as a starting point, but then move online. For example, today, it’s easy to find an editor or agent on Twitter and follow them for a while to see if they’ll be a good fit. Are they encouraging or contemptuous of authors? Do you like their approach to problems? And so on. Follow a local publisher’s Facebook page or sign up for their newsletter. Research on the market is key to getting published.

Whether you decide to submit to an agent or a publisher, there are some common tips:

  • No, you don’t have to have an illustrator lined up. In fact, this could hurt your chances for a sale.
  • The waiting game. Major publishers can receive up to 10,000 manuscripts a year. Of those, they might publish 200. Of those 200, maybe three or four are from new authors. Why should they pick up your story and read it? As for agents, they are also bombarded with manuscripts and are taking on few new clients. To wade through the tsunami of manuscripts, each company (publisher or agent) has developed certain strategies. Be sure to follow their instructions. But even then, it can easily be 3-6 months before they respond. Often, they won’t respond unless they are interested.
  • The personal touch. If that sounded depressing and like you’re fighting an uphill battle, you’re right. In business they say that people do business with people they know. It’s a cliche that holds true in children’s publishing! In other words, you can shortcut some of the waiting by meeting an editor or agent at a conference. The SCBWI national summer conference is now open for registration. But also check out the SCBWI chapters for local or regional conferences.

People do break into children’s publishing every day. The industry needs newcomers with fresh ideas and amazing stories told in amazing ways. They need illustrations that capture a child’s imagination. But this is an industry with a rich history, career professionals and dedicated creative writers and artists. If your interest is casual and by-the-way, you won’t have much of a chance. If you’re ready to dig in and devote a career to children’s literature, welcome! Take that next step and submit your story!

,a href=”http://www.darcypattison.com/picture-books/write-childrens-book-get-published”>Dr. Seuss comments on the skill necessary to write for children and get it published. | DarcyPattison.com

Read More About How to Write Your Children’s Book and Get it Published

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2. It Hurts So Good: Revising Your Novel

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Cynthia Reeg, children's book authorGuest Post by Cynthia Reeg
Revisions can hurt; but revisions are good. In this guest post, Cynthia discusses the revision of her forthcoming debut novel. From the Grave is due out on October 18, 2016 from Jolly Fish Press.

Cover Reveal for From the Grave

Okay, I know I’m totally dating myself with this musical reference, but for me the revision process can be summed up in this lyrical one-liner from John Mellencamp, “It’s hurts so good!”

After I’ve created my first draft (or subsequent 2nd, 3rd, 4th,… drafts), I allow some down time. After the first draft, this is necessary because I’m too love in with what I’ve written to notice many of its faults. And after the following revisions, I’m probably too weary of what I’ve written to notice what’s truly good. By this time, it most likely seems rather tired. FROM THE GRAVE has been a work in progress over a number of years.

In an effort to be somewhat analytic about my revision process (which is the painful part for me), I draw up a spreadsheet and break down each chapter. I note the characters and emotions, setting, plot elements, theme, time, action. This helps me see if I’m maintaining my theme, keeping things moving, involving characters across the board, and being consistent with the time frame. This is similar to what Darcy discusses in her NOVEL METAMORPHOSIS, which I learned at a workshop she conducted.

Darcy’s workshop also highlighted the importance of pacing. Noting the amount of white space on each page can help give an indication of this. Although there are times when exposition is necessary, I try to be vigilant (especially in writing for middle grade readers) about keeping the story moving with dialogue and action. In my revision process, I study the pacing. I use a middle grade plot points guide to see if I’ve stayed on track for a Three Act structure.
From the Grave by Cynthia Reeg | DarcyPattison.com

With my monsters story, I also made a notebook on Rules, Food, Language, Setting, and Character, writing down specifics from each chapter. This was to help me analyze the monster world I’d created. I love writing fantasy because I can make most anything happen, but I have to stay within the boundaries I’ve created for the story to work. When I’m writing on the fly, my muse may throw out an astounding new creature, event, or setting that I didn’t plan for. I need to document all these for future reference and see if there is a conflict.

After the general shape-up of the manuscript is done, the line edits come next. This part of the revision I truly enjoy. Although when it comes to deleting 10,000 words from a story, this can be extremely painful. Writing a manuscript that is as tight as possible is absolutely essential for middle grade. It’s a challenge to keep the story engaging and the voice strong, while pairing down the word count. At this stage, I’m choosing words carefully, making phrases sing, trying to plug in more dialogue and delete lengthy exposition. I pay particular attention to sensory details. But I also focus on story emotions. I can’t afford to lose the impact of my tale in the edits. Most likely, you’ve heard this before: read your story out loud. Especially at this stage of revisions, the lines beg to be read. You’ll quickly hear jumble that slows the pace. You’ll notice words that don’t quite work. You’ll cringe at flat dialogue.

I just finished reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s BIG MAGIC: Creative Living Beyond Fear. In it she asks the question, “Do you have the courage to bring forth the treasures within?” She stresses that fear is always part of the creative process, but you can’t let it take control. Courage is certainly an important part of the revision process. You have to believe you can make your story stronger. You have to believe you can address all your editor’s challenges. And you have to believe that the finished product is going to make a difference in some young reader’s life.

So fight through the fear—and the pain! Be courageous and steadfast! Take up your pen and REVISE!

The post It Hurts So Good: Revising Your Novel appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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3. From Novel to Movie: Greenhorn by Anna Olswanger

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Greenhorn , middle grade novel by Anna Olswanger. | DarcyPattison.com Anna Olswanger’s middle grade novel, GREENHORN (See Review), was made into an indie film. It’s a dream that many of us have, to see our story on the big screen. I asked her to tell us about the process.

Anna’s introduction to the story

In 2014 I co-produced a short indie film adaptation of the novel. The film premiered at the Landmark NuArt Theatre in L.A. and at The Museum of Tolerance in New York. It was named the 2015 Audience Award Winner for Best Short Film Drama at the Morris and Mollye Fogelman International Jewish Film Festival in Memphis, and subsequently aired on public television in Memphis and Kentucky. In February, 2016, it was part of the Festival Internacional De Cine Judio en Mexico and will screen on March 27, 2016 at the International Children’s Film Festival at L.A.’s WonderCon.

TMW Media has just started distributing the film so that libraries and schools can purchase the DVD with public performance rights and show the film in classrooms. TMW is also distributing the film on Amazon to individual viewers. The film could be a tie-in to Holocaust Remembrance Day in May and International Holocaust Remembrance Day in January. The discussion guide for the film is online at the distributor’s site:

GreenHorn Video. Adaptation of novel by Anna Olswanger. | DarcyPattison.com

When did you decide that this book would make a good film?

I think every author hopes that her book will be optioned for film, and as a literary agent, I am used to getting my clients’ books into the hands of film producers. In the case of Greenhorn, I thought that the story had conflict, a strong climax, and a poignant resolution, the right elements for a good film. I just didn’t know how I would interest a producer in such a short book.

How did you find the contact to adapt it to film?

A potential client, who is a screenwriter, submitted a children’s book manuscript to me. It wasn’t a manuscript I could successfully represent, but we began a conversation about her work and she suggested that I show Greenhorn to a director she had worked with. I did contact him, and he liked the book. He asked me if I would like to co-produce the film with him.

As the author, what involvement did you have in the script? Did you have rights of approval/disapproval?

Because I was the co-producer, I was able to read the script and comment on it. My main concern was authenticity. I wanted to make sure that anyone familiar with that era of history during the 1940s would be convinced by the film.

Once the book goes to film, who is in charge? Where does the buck stop? When the book is adapted for film what is the author’s role? Nothing? Or do you have veto rights on decisions? For example, Ella Enchanted became a farce almost in movie format, a far cry from the book itself. Authors worry. What if their “baby” is misunderstood?

As a literary agent, I can confirm that the interpretation of the producer and screenwriter is of concern to authors. But unless you’re a big name author, you have to let go of your book when you option it. You’ve been paid money by someone who is excited by your story and has a vision of it as a film, and you have to trust that this person’s vision will enhance your book. If you don’t trust the producer, then don’t option the book. I think the situation is similar to being the author of a picture book text and having to let go when the illustrator comes on board. The picture book author has to let the illustrator have her own vision of the story. You can’t control what the illustrator sees. However, I was in the unique position of being both the author of the book and the co-producer of the film, so I was able to read the script and make suggestions for changes.

As the author, what surprised you about the film adaptation?

I remember from my days as a college theatre major how quickly and deeply friendships are formed among cast members, but it surprised me to see similar friendships develop among the boys who were in the cast of this film. It was fun to watch them play around during the times when we weren’t filming. See the wonderful photo of them after we filmed a scene.

The director/screenwriter, who happens not to be Jewish, recently told me he wants to develop a feature-length version of the story to flesh out the backstory of the children and their lives outside the yeshiva. It constantly surprises me how this story resonates with people, especially people who have no connection to the Holocaust or even Jewish history.
Hurrah! It was fun for these actors to star in  GREENHORN, by Anna Olswanger | DarcyPattison.com

Actors formed close ties during the filming of GREENHORN by ANNA OLSWANGER. | DarcyPattison.com

The indie film, GREENHORN, by  Anna Olswanger is a poignant Jewish story. | DarcyPattison.com

Will the process change how you write your next book?

I don’t think so, but the process has made me see how satisfying it is to see work in one medium take on a life in another medium.

Is there any money in all of this for you, the author?

Greenhorn is a small indie film, and as the co-producer I had to raise the funds to pay the actors, the production staff, the travel and hotel expenses for the crew during filming, props, hair dresser, catering, music, post sound design, and insurance. We didn’t budget in fees for the director or producers, or for me as the author, so there isn’t money in this for me. Even so, I would do it again.

Trailer for Greenhorn

If you can’t see this video, click here.

Darcy’s note about developing your own PR package:
For publicity purposes, Anna presented me with a complete package. She quickly answered some key questions about the process of creating a film from a novel. When she sent me the answers, she included interesting photos, details about where the film had aired, how to buy the movie on Amazon, links to a free discussion guide, suggestions on when it might be appropriate to view the film in an education setting, and a great movie trailer easily available on YouTube. If you’re doing publicity for a book or movie, this is a case study in how to do it right!

The post From Novel to Movie: Greenhorn by Anna Olswanger appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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4. Scrivener: Sculpting a Story

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Do you write your novels? Or do you sculpt it out of words?

I’ve been working with Scrivener for about two years now, and on my current WIP, it’s finally starting to feel normal. In fact, it’s changed the way I work.

Buy Scrivener 2 for Mac OS X (Education Licence)
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Before Scrivener

My working method in the before Scrivener days was a mixture of outlining and pantster. I outlined the story, wrote about half of it, stopped to re-outline and then wrote some more. Sometimes, I had to re-outline several times before I made it through a full draft.

Writing in Scrivener enables innovative methods of working. Try it to see your options! | DarcyPattison.com

After Scrivener

For a while, the same process carried on. But my current WIP has been different.

Scrivener is a complicated, multi-faceted program. It’s such a different program from writing in a word processor like MSWord, and so complex, that when I bought the program, I immediately took an online class with Gwen Hernandez (NOT an affiliate link, just a satisfied customer!). She takes you through the many elements that are possible when you use Scrivener.

One of the best things that Gwen said to me was to keep an open mind about how to use the program. She said don’t decide how to use some element of Scrivener. Instead, just work. As you’re working, when you need something – THEN decide how to accomplish what you want, using one of the available options.

The program has so many possibilities, for example, on how to mark up a file so you can find it later: file name, synopsis or summary of the contents, color-coding, notes and so on. You can look at it as if the chapter were file cards, or look at each discrete file, or look at them as a continuous text. What makes sense to one person would confuse another.

It reminds me of my daughter in Algebra class in high school. Her teacher required the dreaded notebook check. My daughter was required to keep every piece of paper given as notes or homework and organize them interleaved in a daily fashion. However, to her, it made more sense to keep the notes in one section by date, and the homework in another section by date. When she turned in her notebook–even though she had every single piece of paper required and organized in a logical way–she was given a zero. She refused the opportunity to reorganize it because, to her, it didn’t make sense.

That’s the beauty of Scrivener. You can organize it YOUR WAY!

How Scrivener is Changing My Writing Process

The biggest change is working in the Scrivener Binder. This time, it feels like I’m sculpting a story. Using the binder, I created 4 acts and set up files with names of what I expected to happen. Using either the Hero’s Journey or Blake Snyder’s Save the Cat outline method–sometimes a combination of both–I knew that at a certain point in the story, the main character had to face the villain. In another place, he could relax a bit and enjoy the new world into which he’d traveled. And so on.

That means the binder was a sort of loose outline for what should happen in a well-plotted story.

For a couple chapters (or maybe they’ll be scenes and be combined into a chapter–everything is loose right now), I wrote. But then, I started working all over the binder. I’d write a scrap of dialogue in one place, then jump down to another section and write a reaction to that dialogue. Exciting descriptions were added in appropriate places, then revised to fit the action that was added later.

Without Scrivener’s Binder, I’d be totally lost! With it, I’m able to walk around the story and look at its shape. It feels rather like a sculptor who takes a wire frame and adds clay to rough out a figure. Then, the sculptor refines a bit on the hands, skips to shape of the head, and approximates the way the clothing drapes the body. All the while, I”m walking all around the story, looking at it from different angles and seeing where things connect. Taking off bits here and adding bits there.

For example, an important plot point at one spot was that a supporting character was sick because of anemia. There was an Ah-Ha! moment when I realized that the anemia would get worse. In fact, it could get so bad that she’d need a blood transfusion. Who would be available for that? Since the main character is an alien, he couldn’t donate blood! Her estranged mother, of course, would be the poignant choice. But it had to all happen in the midst of a hand-to-hand combat. Can you see the scene? The doctor–under less than ideal conditions–is trying to put a needle in the mother’s arm to collect blood and as soon as there’s a full bag, well–you know that in fiction, everything has to get WORSE for the main character, right–so the fight gets too close and the bag of blood is split open and they have to start over again. Because the girl is so sick that she needs the blood NOW, or else.

That connection was amazing. The choice of anemia as the illness was a spur of the moment choice, in the midst of trying out some ideas about illnesses. Then, when the anemia needed to worsen (or she needed a different symptom of the illness), it made sense to take it to the extreme and to plop it down in the midst of an action scene to make it more urgent. The estranged mother made it more poignant.

Ah, but where did the estranged mother come from. In other words, I had to track her throughline in the story and account for her movements in every scene. Or else her presence in this crucial scene would feel wrong. How could she contribute to the ongoing scenes I had planned. Obviously, she’s a supporting character and not the main character. When and how would her presence make the story stronger? The question sent me skipping around the scenes in the Scrivener binder again.

The point is that this process is leading me to see things afresh and find unexpected options, which make perfect sense in the context of the story. Had I been writing chronologically, the connection may or may not have happened. I think not.

This method of working is fascinating.

It’s been hard to give myself permission to skip around like this. I’m really enjoying writing this story and hopefully, one day, you’ll enjoy reading it.

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5. Rough Out a Scene: Goals, DOs, DON’Ts, and the Writing

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Lately, I’ve taken to roughing out a scene before I start writing.

Rough Out a Scene: Goals

I want to be excited to write the scene. I’m looking for the sparks, the exciting bits of this particular scene. Finding this early is helpful because I don’t waste time slogging through extraneous stuff. Instead, I can decide on smart scene cuts so I stay interested, which means the audience will stay interested!

I want the scene setting and action beats to be roughed out. Beats are the small units of action of a story: he stopped, rubbed his nose, sneezed, grabbed a tissue, and then wheezed out an answer. They are intimately tied to the setting because the action moves in, out and through the scenery. In the theater, this would be blocking out a scene and deciding where the actor stands on the stage and how they move across the stage. I may also work on deciding when to zoom, pan or scan.

I want to know the characters’ emotional responses. When an action beat occurs, I want to know the responses of the characters. Why was it important to write this action beat? If it doesn’t evoke an emotional response, maybe it’s not important enough to include in the final draft.

Rough Out a Scene - Read tips and strategies for a stronger novel. | Fiction Notes at DarcyPattison.com

Rough out a scene: Don’ts

I don’t worry about perfection. I give myself permission to produce what kids call “sloppy copy.” It’s OK. I just want something on the page so that it’s easier to get the scene right later.

Don’t worry about verb tense, present or past. Sometimes, I bounce around like crazy. It’s OK. I’ll fix it when I actually write the scene.

Don’t worry about POV. It’s OK. I’ll often change POV during this rough-in stage. One advantage of this is that I’ll know the character’s emotion response. If it’s the POV character, I may be able to use the info as their thoughts. If it’s not the POV character, I’ll have to change the response into a physical action or perhaps signal it with body language. In the roughing out stage, I just need to know the emotions. I’ll follow conventions later.

Don’t worry about punctuation. It’s OK. I don’t worry about quotation marks around speech, or any other punctuation marks at this stage.

Don’t worry about details (unless you can’t stand not to!). In my current WIP novel, for example, my characters are at the bottom of the North Sea and should be seeing several species of fish. What fish would they see? Sometimes, I can just put in a placeholider, such as XXX. Then, research it before I do the final draft and include details then. But sometimes, I am compelled to stop and figure that out during the rough-in stage. When I do, it’s likely to be a long list and for the final draft, I’ll have to choose the best of the list.

Rough out a scene: DOs

Do worry about finding the heart of the scene. Where is the pivot point, the emotional fulcrum upon which the scene rests. I must find that emotional heart during this stage, or I won’t have the excitement needed to write it well.

Do worry about details. OK, I just said above do NOT worry about details. So, it just depends. Sometimes a scene doesn’t come alive for me with the details and sometimes it does. Scenes with lots of dialogue and not much action need dialogue details, but not scene details. Action-heavy scenes need the action bits in detail, but maybe it’s fine to skimp on the dialogue. You must decide what you need for each scene.

Rough out a scene: When to stop and write.

How much time do I spend on this stage? It varies.
When do I stop roughing it out and write the thing? It varies. Sometimes, I only need a sketchy, minimal rough to write from. But in my current WIP novel, I’m doing a lot of world-building as I go. That means I have to figure out the scenery, name anything important like buildings or landscape features, think of a history of the area, and then put my characters in that setting. For science fiction and fantasy then, it takes longer to rough out a scene. For romance or contemporary novels, this stage of writing may go quicker.

I know that I need to write the actual scene when I’ve roughed it out enough that I’m excited to write it. Instead of holding back any longer, the words just flow. Sometimes, I’ll print out the rough and just glance at it while I write. Sometimes, I’ll work directly in the file and just revise the rough into the finished draft.

In other words, this is one more tool to put in your writer’s toolkit. Rough out your scene until you can approach the actual writing with great enthusiasm and passion!

The post Rough Out a Scene: Goals, DOs, DON’Ts, and the Writing appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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6. 4 Crucial Yearnings to Enrich and Deepen Your Characters

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When we develop characters, we know the drill. You must know what your character wants. But as I’ve worked on my current novel, I wasn’t getting to the heart of the character the way I wanted. So, I switched up the wording and asked, “What does this character yearn for?”

The idea of yearning goes deeper for me than just asking, “What does your character want?”
Yearning is a deep-seated emotional vacuum that needs to be filled. It’s more compelling because it permeates the character’s life. Also, it implies change and that’s crucial. If a character years to be more respected, then we can see that he progresses along the continuum somehow from NO RESPECT to WIDELY RESPECTED. The idea of “wanting” didn’t give me the character arc in the same way that “yearning” did.

We could say that a mystery is about a yearning for answers. But that’s not personal enough for a yearning. Answers fill a character’s want or need, but it’s hard to see it as fulfilling a yearning. A wish/need for excitement — as in a thriller or action/adventure — doesn’t feel quite personal enough to be called a yearning either. Yearnings are for character stories or subplots, places where raw emotions surface and are thwarted in the service of the story, so that the yearning becomes even deeper. Yearnings are personal.

Yearnings to Write By

4 Crucial Yearnings to Deepen and Enrich Your Characters | Fiction Notes by Darcy Pattison

  1. Yearn for Each Other – Romance. The hero and heroine yearn for each other. When characters fall in love, it’s not enough just that they want each other. On some level, their relationship must be tested, thwarted, or put on a side burner. But underneath the yearning smolders. The continuum goes from NO RELATIONSHIP to INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP.
  2. Yearn for Growth – Coming of Age. Maturation comes with deep yearnings to be more than you are at this point in time. Yearnings to become worthy, proud, skilled, competent, or loved. The continuum goes from NAIVE to EXPERIENCED.
  3. Yearn for Change – Quest or Journey. Quests and journeys take characters on a journey from point A to point B. The most successful quest/journey stories, though, let the inner journey shape the path and the complications. In other words, the character’s yearning for change is a major plot driver. The continuum goes from STATUS QUO to MAJOR CHANGE.
  4. Yearn for Connection – Relationships. . This can cover many types of stories: revenge, rivalry, underdog, love, forbidden love, sacrifice, discovery and ambition. When the story centers on positive relationships, the yearning is for connection. When it’s a negative relationship, the yearning is to dissolve the connections. The continuum goes from ISOLATED to CONNECTED.

By exploring my character’s deepest yearnings, I’ve easily created a character arc, which puts me a long way toward a plot, as well.

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7. Oliver Meets Rowdy: A Case Study of an Ongoing Promotion

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One of my stories, THE JOURNEY OF OLIVER K. WOODMAN, is in a HMH reading textbook, Journeys.


It’s usually read in the spring and one activity that students often do is to send a laminated paper version of Oliver on a trip to visit folks. DownloadLessonPlans
Download the 2016 Lesson Plan pack, which includes Sample Chapters from five novels.(24 MB, zip file from Dropbox).

The Lesson Plan pack includes a simple paper pattern for Oliver. This is an example or case study of an easy ongoing promotion. First, I’ll explain what happened, and then we’ll look at how you can do the same for your book.

Interact with Readers

This year, Cynthia Wells, a teacher from Quitman, AR, contacted me and said that Kailin, her student, would like to send me her Oliver for a week’s visit. Of course, I can’t always do this, but this was a good year to say, “Yes!”

Kaylin holding her Oliver and the envelope Darcy Pattison sent her. | Mims House.com
Kaylin sent her Oliver to visit me in my Blue Office. She’s holding the envelope I sent back.

When a student sends an Oliver around, they ask people to take photos of Oliver in different places. See the Oliver Pinterest board.

Oliver Sees the Sights

Here are some things Oliver did with me.

Kailin's Oliver met the BIG Oliver that lives in my Blue Office. | DarcyPattison.com
Kailin’s Oliver met the BIG Oliver that lives in my Blue Office. | DarcyPattison.com

Oliver joins a drummer. | DarcyPattison.com
Oliver joins a drummer and makes a bit of noise. | DarcyPattison.com

Oliver visited the Genius Bar at the Apple store to get Darcy Pattison's computer fixed.. | DarcyPattison.com
Oliver visited the Genius Bar at the Apple store to get Darcy Pattison’s computer fixed.. | DarcyPattison.com

Oliver Meets Rowdy

Of course, Oliver couldn’t leave without reading Rowdy, which is my Summer, 2016 book. The pirate captain, Miss Whitney Black McKee, and Oliver had a nice chat and compared adventures and travels.

Oliver Meets Rowdy, Darcy Pattison's Summer 2016 book. | DarcyPattison.com
Oliver Meets Rowdy, Darcy Pattison’s Summer 2016 book. | DarcyPattison.com

Preorder ROWDY now and it will be delivered on May 25






And then, Oliver settled in to read Rowdy’s story. Imagine Captain McKee’s dismay when Oliver found a misspelled word in her book! Oh, my! It was lucky that Oliver came along to save the day!

Oliver K. Woodman finds a misspelled work in Captain McKee's story, ROWDY. | DarcyPattison.com
Oliver K. Woodman finds a misspelled work in Captain McKee’s story, ROWDY. | DarcyPattison.com

Finally, here’s Kailin reading another of my books, I WANT A DOG, to her class. A happy reader! That’s what we like to see!

Kailin was so excited to receive a new book, I Want a Dog, that she had to read it to the class. | DarcyPattison.com
Kailin was so excited to receive a new book, I Want a Dog, that she had to read it to the class. | DarcyPattison.com

Your Promotion

Here’s a couple lessons for your promotion.

  • Lesson Plans. Provide Downloadable Lesson plans on your website, Pinterest boards, etc.
  • Interact. When asked to interact with readers, do it if your schedule allows.
  • Fun. I took Oliver places that I thought would be fun. I didn’t worry about promotional possibilities while playing tour guide for Oliver. It was just for fun.
  • Generous. Be generous if you can. I sent along an extra paperback book, just for fun.
  • Permission. When the teacher contacted me, I asked and received permission to share the photos of the student.
  • Share. I’ll be sharing this post on Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, etc. Be sure all your social media accounts are in order before you start something like this.
  • Thanks. I’ll be sure to thank the teacher for thinking about sending Oliver to visit!

The post Oliver Meets Rowdy: A Case Study of an Ongoing Promotion appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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8. In Publishing, You Live or Die by Your Opinion

Join Me This Summer: Writing Workshops

at Highlights Foundation

I once asked an editor if she regretted passing on the opportunity to become the publisher of the Harry Potter series.

The editor said, “In the publishing world, you live or die by your opinion. In spite of Harry Potter’s success, it still wouldn’t have been the right book for me to publish.”

In Your Opinion, What is Good Writing?

The first place you need to draw a line in the sand is one the question of quality. The quality of the story, the plotting, the characterization, the storytelling and so on is crucial to the success of a writing and publishing project. You need to listen tot he “still, small voice” that tells you this story needs another revision or that story measures up to the highest standard.

A sense of great stories is important to develop and most agree that a wide knowledge of the genre in which you write. If you want to write a picture book, you should read 100 picture books published within the last five years. If you want to write a YA novel, you should be familiar with the popular writers of the day. Of course, you can’t read 4000 novels in a year, so you’ll have to pick and choose. But notice what you like, enjoy, discard after a few chapters and so on. Develop a sense of what you like or don’t like. In short develop an appreciation of great writing. Give yourself something solid on which to base your opinion. Because you’ll live or die by it.

When I see really bad self-published children’s books, it’s most often from a person who doesn’t read children’s books. They just had a “great idea” and with no research or background in children’s literature, push through an awful book. I’ve actually had people tell me, “I’m not a writer. I just wanted to do this book.” That person’s project will die an early death because they didn’t educate their opinion.

Inspiring quote about writing: "Spend it all," says Annie Dillard | darcypattison.com

In Your Opinion, Is this the BEST Writing You Can Do?

After writing a great story or novel, have you taken the time to let it cool off, to get feedback from trusted readers, and to take time to revise it to the best of your ability? Have you held anything back, or did you spend it all?

Author Annie Dillard, in her great essays, Write Till You Drop, wrote:
One of the few things I know about writing is this: spend it all, shoot it, play it, lose it, all, right away, every time. Do not hoard what seems good for a later place in the book, or for another book; give it, give it all, give it now. The impulse to save something good for a better place later is the signal to spend it now. Something more will arise for later, something better. These things fill from behind, from beneath, like well water. Similarly, the impulse to keep to yourself what you have learned is not only shameful, it is destructive. Anything you do not give freely and abundantly becomes lost to you. You open your safe and find ashes.

After Michelangelo died, someone found in his studio a piece of paper on which he had written a note to his apprentice, in the handwriting of his old age: ”Draw, Antonio, draw, Antonio, draw and do not waste time.”

In your opinion, have to done your best? Then, send it out.
If not, fix it. But write, authors, write.

Answering Objection

BUT, you say. . .

My boy/girl friend didn’t like it.
My Significant Other didn’t like it.
My kid didn’t like it.
My agent didn’t like it.
My editor didn’t like it.

This genre isn’t selling right now.
No one buys books by authors from XXX.
I don’t have a HUGE social media following.
Blah, blah, blah.

Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Do YOU like what you wrote?

You live or die by your opinion.
If it’s not the best you can write, then fix it. Revise. Do whatever it takes to make it live up to your opinion.

If YOU like it, then send it out, and keep sending it out, until you find an editor who agrees with you.

The post In Publishing, You Live or Die by Your Opinion appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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9. How to Write a MetaFiction Picture Book


Coming February 9!

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I’m working on a revision of my book, How to Write a Picture Book (Look for the new version in September). One section goes through various genres with tips on writing an ABC book, a narrative nonfiction, a picture book mystery, etc. One genre that I neglected in the first draft was metafiction picture books.

A Revealing Conversation between DH and Me

Me: I need to write a blog post about metafiction picture books.
Darling Husband (DH): What’s that?
Me: You know. Postmodern stuff.
DH: What?
Me: They are books that refer to themselves in some way. They break the concept of “book” in the story itself.
DH: Oh. Faux books.

Metafiction picture books are those that break the mold by making the reader aware that they are reading a book. Often fiction writers talk about the immersive book, and value stories that transport a reader to a story world and immerse them totally in the story. The reader’s surroundings disappear and they are deeply involved with the story.

Metafiction breaks that immersive experience. Why? In the theater, this is referred to as breaking the fourth wall.  The stage has a back wall and two wings; the fourth wall is invisible wall that separates the audience from the stage. When an actor turns to the audience and makes comments, it’s breaking the fourth wall. The technique can be used to add information, set up irony, create humor or other purposes.

While metafiction isn’t new, it’s been more prevalent in the last few decades. Some say that it’s related to the postmodern philosophy. Read more about postmodernism here.

So, what is a metafiction picture book? Let’s look at some characteristics typical of this genre. Of course, you won’t use all of these in any given book. You can mix and match techniques to tell your story (or un-story). The best way to understand these is to read through a variety of the books suggested below.

Characteristics of a Metafiction Picture Book

Me: One reason I need to write this is because I’ve been trying to critique some manuscripts and having a hard time.
DH: You expect them to be a certain way and they aren’t.
Me: Well. Yes. There are rules about writing picture books.
DH: Are there?

  1. Parody or irony.
    Some metafiction picture books refer to folk or fairy tales, often with irony or parody.
    Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Book? By Lauren Child
  2. Pastiche. Copying a certain style of art to create something very different, these are usually author-illustrator stories. Willy the Dreamer by Anthony Browne.
  3. Story gaps. Sometimes the text has gaps that require readers to make decisions about the story and its meaning. Academics call this interdeterminancy. The Three Little Pigs by David Wiesner.
  4. Multiple narrators or characters. The story includes multiple point-of-view characters, often with multiple story arcs. In Chloe and the Lion by Mac Barnett, illustrated by Adam Rex, the author, illustrator and main character each tell separate stories and talk to each other. The complex interaction has three separate endings.See also:
    • Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales by Jon Scieszka and Lane Smith
    • Black and White by David Macauley
    • Voices in the Park by Anthony Browne
  5. Direct address to reader. When you use second person point-of-view and talk to the reader, the story can fall into the metafiction category.In a quick review of different points-of-view, you can usually figure out the story’s POV by looking at the pronouns.
    1st person: I, me, my
    2nd person: You, yours
    3rd person: he, she, it, his, hersIn Warning! Do Not Open This Book, by Adam Lehrhaupt, the reader is warned against opening the book. When—of course—the child does open the book, the text provides other warnings.
    See also: Thank You, Sarah: The Woman Who Saved Thanksgiving, by Laurie Halse Anderson,
  6. Non-linear, non-sequential. Most narratives follow a certain time sequence. This happens first, and then that happens. There’s a beginning, middle and end. However, metafiction picturebooks create stories without a clear reference to time order. In Black and White by David Macaulay, each page is divided into four sections which tell different stories and it’s up to the reader to connect them. Or not.
  7. Narrator becomes a character. The author or narrator of the story steps into the story and participates. In Chester, by Melanie Watts, a simple story devolves into an argument between a cat and the author about what story to tell.
  8. Unusual book design or layout. Some metaficiton picture books have unusual typography, while others use a layout that breaks the story out of the page or book. Three Little Pigs by David Wiesner, has illustrations showing the pigs folding up a page and climbing out of the story onto a blank page. Or, they fold up a page into a paper airplane and take a ride.
  9. Stories within Stories. No Bears by Meg McKinlay, Ella writes a book within the book.
  10. Characters and narrators speak directly to the reader.
    Sandra Boynton’s board book, Moo, Baa, La, La, La.
    The text says,
    “The pigs say, ‘la, la, la.’
    ‘No, no,’ you say, that isn’t right.
    The pigs say, ‘Oink,’ all day and night.”
  11. Characters who comment about their own or other stories. In Chester by Melanie Watt, the author and cat character go back and forth about the story. Among other shenanigans, the cat crosses out the author’s name on the cover and puts his own name.
  12. Disruption of time and space relationships. Redwoods by Jason Chin. A boy picks up a nonfiction book about redwood forests and enters the forest.
  13. Something makes the readers aware of what makes up a story. In Help! We Need a Title! By Herve Tullet, characters realize someone is watching them (that’s YOU, the reader) and decide to make up a story. In the end, they invite the author to help finish the story.
  14. Mixing of Genres.
    In A Book by Mordecai Gerstein, a girl runs into characters from different genres in a search for her own story. This allows the reader to learn about elements of different genres.
  15. Metafiction + Creative nonfiction. Can you write a metafiction nonfiction picture book? Yes. These stories often mix informational text with fiction. No Monkeys, No Chocolate by Melissa Stewart and Allen Young features a couple of worms who make funny comments while the narrator explains where chocolate comes from.
How to Write a Metafiction Picture Book | DarcyPattison.com
How to Write a Metafiction Picture Book | DarcyPattison.com

Writing a Metafiction Picture Book

DH: Actually, I do metaficiton.
Me: What? When?

Flashback to memory of DH telling bedtime stories to our kids:
“Once upon a time, there were three bears. Flopsy, Mospy and Peter Bear.”

Me: (Slapping forehead) Oh, my goodness. You’re a metafiction storyteller!
At least, there’s one in the family.

Know the Rules – Break the Rules
If you’ve read my book, How to Write a Children’s Picture Book, you’ll know most of the “rules” of writing a picture book. Break any rule that’s reasonable for the story, but have a reason to break it. You may want to inject humor, parody, information, or yourself into the story for a good reason. Do it. And do it boldly.

Metafiction Topics
While you can write about anything, often the topic of a metafiction picture book is to explain a book or some element of fiction or writing. That’s reflected in titles such as It’s a Book, There are No Cats in This Book, and Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Book. Of course, if you try this, remember that you’ll have lots of competition.

Good Read Alouds
Make sure these are good read alouds because youngest readers may read these with adults to make sure it’s understood. Read more about how to make your story a good read aloud here.

Have fun
One of the main reasons to write a metafiction picture book is to have fun, to play with the genre. Do something unexpected, disrespectful, funny.

Critiquing Metafiction Picture Books

DH: Actually, I like a lot of the books you’re calling metafiction.
Me: Why?
DH: They’re unexpected. A surprise. They make me laugh. Kids love them.

      An aside: In my household, it’s understood that I don’t have a sense of humor.
          Slap stick? No, it’s not funny.
          Potty jokes? Absolutely not.
          Metafiction? I’m not laughing.

DH: Of course, it’s hard for you to critique metafiction manuscripts.
Me: (Groan. Why is he always right?)
DH: (Wisely, DH refrains from saying anything else.)

Authors, give your group (or editor) a heads up.
When I approach a critique of a picture book, I am always expecting a traditional story. So, it’s helpful if the author is aware of the type picture book they are writing and can tell the critique group, “This is a metafiction picture book.”

Readers, read the story in front of you.
I often read movie or book reviews and get aggravated because the review is more about the reader than the text. The reviewer talks about what they wanted or predicted and how those preconceptions were disappointed. That’s the danger in critiquing this special type of picture book. Especially for metafiction picture books, you must read the text in front of you. Be open to a new way of telling a story for kids.

Resources: Read More

  1. Ann. Teaching Tips: Fun with Metafiction. July 30, 2015. Many Roads to Reading blog. Nice list of books and teaching tips.
  2. Tantari, Sue. The Postmodern Picture Book and Its Impact on Classroom Literacy. C. 2014
    Great explanation of metafiction picture books, including interactive elements, illustrations from selected books, charts and audio. If you’re totally new to this genre, start here.

Metafiction Picture Books to Study

Look for other titles by these authors, too.

Ahlberg, Allen. The Pencil
Barnett, Mac. Chloe and the Lion
Bingham, Kelly. Z is for Moose
Boynton, Sandra. Moo, Baa, La, La, La
Browne, Anthony. Willy the Dreamer
Child, Lauren. Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Book?
Chin, Jason. Redwoods
Freedman, Deborah. Scribble
Gerstein, Mordecai. A Book
Gravett, Emily. Wolves
Hopkinson, Deborah. Abe Lincoln Crosses a Creek
Lehman, Barbara. The Red Book
Macauley, David. Black and White
Schwarz, Viviane. There are No Cats in this Book
Scieszka, Jon and Lane Smith. Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales
Smith, Lane. It’s a Book
Spiegelman, Art. Open Me. . .I’m a Dog!
Stewart, Melissa. No Monkeys, No Chocolate
Tullet, Herve. Help! We Need a Title!
Watt, Mélanie. Chester
Willems, Mo. We Are in a Book

The post How to Write a MetaFiction Picture Book appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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10. Review: The Art of Comic Book Writing


Coming February 9!

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One of the most puzzling, yet exciting formats for writers is the graphic novel. That’s the new name for comic books, or telling stories in a set of illustrated panels. In some writing a graphic novel is like writing a movie script, except the images are still instead of moving.

Writing a graphic novel comes with lots of questions.

  • What’s the standard format for a graphic novel manuscript?
  • Do you have to provide the illustrations?
  • How do you decide how many panels per page?
  • How do you pace a story across a couple pages?

Many of these questions relate also to writing children’s picture books, which are a combination of text and illustrations.

Finally, I have a resource I’d like to recommend to answer these questions: The Art of Comic Book Writing: The Definitive Guide to Outlining, Scripting, and Pitching Your Sequential Art Stories by Mark Kneece. Available as Kindle or paperback.

Writing a Graphic Novel or a  Children's Picture Book? Highly recommended resource for understanding how layout affects a story. | DarcyPattison.com
Writing a Graphic Novel or a Children’s Picture Book? Highly recommended resource for understanding how layout affects a story. | DarcyPattison.com

NOTE: I didn’t receive a review copy on this book. I just found it at my local library and was captivated.

Kneece has taught comic book writing at the Savannah College of Design for over two decades and his expertise and experience shows. He has created eight graphic novel adaptations of The Twilight Zone, and has published numerous graphic novels and comics, including work for Hellraiser, Verdilak, Alien Encounters, Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight, and The Spirit.

Comics Tell Great Stories

Kneece begins with an emphasis on the story that you want to tell with hints on how to develop a story past a gag. You’ll see actual examples of a formatted script. Next comes a detailed look at a single page and how a story flows across the page. Templates for a 5-panel, 6-panel, 9-panel and 12-panel bring the page to life. Rough sketches illustrate Kneece’s points about how a story flows across these different panels.

With the basics out of the way, the book gets really interesting digging into dialogue, text, characters, pacing and more. This is a fantastic book for those writing picture books because everything he says here applies to both comics and children’s picture books.

I LOVE the pacing chapters.
In Part 1, pp125-127, there’s a great example of revising for pacing, emphasis and impact. The question is where to expand the story with more details and where to compress the story for impact. This is one of the best illustrations of pacing an illustrated story that I’ve seen.

And then, in Part 2, there’s a great example of a story with a boy hears an ice cream truck. The top row is 4 panels.
Panel 1: A boy is playing with a toy rocket. A few musical notes intrude into the frame.
Panel 2: grass and musical notes
Panel 3: grass and musical notes that are trending upward
Panel 4: musical notes dance past the trunk of a large tree.

In other words the 4 panels operate more like one large panel that spans four panels. But the choice to create four panels – a quad-tych, if you will – adds energy to the story. It’s brilliant.

If you’re an illustrator of children’s books, you need to study this book. If you write children’s picture books, you need to study this book. Comic books writers and illustrators, it’s definitely the best text I’ve seen on the topic. Highly recommended.

The post Review: The Art of Comic Book Writing appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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11. 5 AMAZING Reasons to Write a Short Story: Develop and Market Your Novel


Coming February 9!

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I’m working on a trilogy of science fiction stories and they began with a short story.

A couple years ago, in preparation for attending a conference, I wrote a sff short story. It was accepted for publication in a Fiction River anthology and became my first ever fiction publication for adults. But I knew even as I wrote it that it was backstory for the YA trilogy that I had planned.

That story has had repercussions throughout my novels and here’s how a short story could benefit YOUR novel.

5 Amazing Reasons to Write a Short Story | DarcyPattison.com

Backstory. The backstory is everything that happens before the opening scene of your novel. It involved family, parents, culture, historical events and so on. Why are you starting your novel at this particular place and time? Because it’s the beginning of the “day of change.” Your novel needs an exciting start. It doesn’t need a long historical tome that explains why this or that is important. See more about great openings. However, it is crucial that YOU, the author, know all that stuff.

Instead of dryly writing up a world history, why not write a short story about it? My short story introduces the first time that humans meet the aliens from the planet Rison. Of course, the main characters in that story are important in the novel: they are the parents of the novel’s main character. It’s their love story and the reason for the main character’s existence as a half-human/half-alien boy. And of course, that identity reverberates throughout the novel.

Excitement. Writing the short story, the worlds poured out. Hey, it didn’t matter if I “got it right” because I was writing this just for me. Yes, there was a conference, but really, I thought I’d be the only one to read it. That gave me great freedom to write and explore the possibilities of the world I’d imagined. What fun! I went places that surprised me in the short story. I think that freedom, the fun, and the very loose attitude toward the writing was helpful in developing the foundation for my novel.

Voice. Besides writing something fun, the story story was an opportunity to test out a certain voice. I reached for a scientific feel that would firmly pull my story into the science fiction camp instead of fantasy. Short stories are an easy way to test voice without a big commitment.

Publication. The fact that the short story was published was a bonus! If you write for adults, there are many such markets. At times, YA writers can also cross over to these markets. If you write for middle grade, good luck; there are few markets for short stories for that audience.

Marketing. Finally, I see these short stories as fiction that I can give away to garner interest in the novels. With giveaways such a prevalent strategy these days, it makes sense to plan what to give away. This will be better than giving away a full book, but it should do as good a job in getting readers interested in the story and my writing.

I find myself needing to write another short story to accompany Book 2, and for much the same reason. The backstory needs more depth and concrete details. I’ve been trying this week to hammer out this and that, without much success. And then, I remembered the story story as a tool in my writer’s tool box. I’ll be writing at least one and maybe two or three short stories this coming week.

The post 5 AMAZING Reasons to Write a Short Story: Develop and Market Your Novel appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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12. Preview Widget: Amazon Book Marketing Tool


Coming February 9!

PreOrder Now!

Amazon is now providing a new twist on book marketing with an embeddable widget that allows a preview. Word is that it looks great on mobile or desktop. And Wow, is it easy to implement!

Here’s an example of how it looks for a picture book.

And an example of how it looks for a novel. It allows you to read a couple chapters before you decide if you want to buy or not.

Want your own widget? Here’s Amazon’s simple 1-2-3 step process to put such a widget on your website. The screenshots make it easy. Are you an Amazon affiliate? If you embed the code on your website, the widget allows you to add your affiliate id number. This is a slick, dead-simple promotional tool!

I did try it for my forthcoming book, BURN: MICHAEL FARADAY’S CANDLE, which is now available for preorder. Unfortunately, the widget wasn’t available for it. I also tried adding the link to Facebook, but that didn’t work either.

The post Preview Widget: Amazon Book Marketing Tool appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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13. Start! Again. And Again. And Again. . .

Happy Birthday, Jacob Grimm

Saucy and Bubba cover

In honor of Jacob Grimm's birthday,
this retelling of Hansel and Gretel is on sale: 10%

In their wise book about the nature of making art, Art and Fear: Observations on the Perils (and Rewards) of Artmaking, David Bayles and Ted Orland say that people don’t STOP writing. Instead, they fail to begin again.

Beating the Holiday Stops by Starting Again

Today, I’m trying to beat the holiday STOPS by starting again. And I feel the resistance. I love my current WIP. I’m excited by the possibilities. I see the problems and have possible solutions to try. And yet —

Putting words on the page/screen is hard. I don’t know where to start. The story is a bit convoluted right now and I’m not sure I can solve the problems, even though I have strategies to try. I’m unsettled, unfocused, uncommitted. Pulled in too many directions.

And yet, a writer is a person who writes.

It’s comforting to go back to ART AND FEAR and reread that the core problem is to begin again. I must start. And it almost doesn’t matter where.

When I taught Freshman Composition, I often had students who balked at writing. After all, I had only the average students. The A/B students tested out of taking Freshman Comp. The D/F students didn’t come to college. That meant I had a class full of B/C/D average students. Often, they planned their entire schedule around my class. They had nothing before my class so they could write something at the last minute. They had nothing after my class, so they could hide in their room and weep. They did not WANT to write.

My advice was to write. Move the pen across the page. Do not stop moving the pen across the page until I tell you to stop. If you don’t know WHAT to write, copy this sentence over and over until you want to write something else: “I don’t know what to write, but I have to write something, so I’m writing this.”

Never did a student write that more than twice, because it’s so boring, so obvious. Instead, they’d launch into a tirade about how they really, honestly, completely didn’t want to write. But guess what? They were writing. And soon, they realized griping about writing was boring and started to let their more intelligent thoughts find their way to the page.

It’s the same advice I give myself. Write.
It doesn’t matter.
Write a blog post.
Write a description.
Write a scrap of dialogue.
Write. Let the first word lead to a second word, and that leads to a third and fourth. And so on.

I’m going to write now. I hope you Start Again, too.

Writers don't STOP WRITING. Instead, they fail to start again. So, START! | DarcyPattison.com

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14. Grand Entrance: Pay Attention to This Character

Happy Birthday, Jacob Grimm

Saucy and Bubba cover

In honor of Jacob Grimm's birthday,
this retelling of Hansel and Gretel is on sale: 10%

How do you introduce your character to your reader? Do you give the character a grand entrance or sneak them in while the reader is focused on something else? A grand entrance signals to the reader that this is a character they should pay attention to. Let’s talk about some ways to make this happen.

First, a couple reminders. Great storytelling is built on the foundation of sensory details. When you provide visual, auditory, tactile, gustatory (taste) or actions, the reader becomes immersed in the story as if they were actually present. You can use sensory details to create a zoom, a pan or a scan. A zoom focuses on tiny details; for example, a face fills the entire imagery, with minute details about each feature. The zoom can travel: you may start by describing in detail the character’s shoes and then travel upward to the face. Or start with any significant detail and then pull back to see the whole. For a surgeon, perhaps describe her clever hands and then travel to her scrubs and finally to her face.

At the other extreme, a panorama pulls back to a bird’s eye view of an entire village. A scan is a method of handling a crowd scene by using specific details to represent a general sense of the mass. For example, a scan might do a mini-zoom in on an old man stumbling along with a cane, then quickly move to an infant taking tottering steps, and then contrast those with a strong young man pushing everyone aside. The series of mini-zooms gives a flavor of the crowd, making it more specific and thus more interesting.

Also, remember that story openings work best when they are focused on a scene. Long-winded descriptions might have worked a hundred years ago, but are less successful for today’s impatient audience. Instead, stories succeed when they start with a character who wants something and faces obstacles to their desires. In short, a scene.

With those givens, a grand entrance–the introduction of a main character to the reader–should take place within an active scene. And you’ll have a choice of a zoom, a pan or a scan. Within those parameters, there are other options.
Give Your Character a GRAND Entrance: 6 Tips and 2 Bonus Tips | DarcyPattison.com

  1. In Context of a relationship.
    The first time we see Katniss in Hunger Games is telling. There’s an opening sequence that sets up what the Hunger Games are, and then there’s a scene cut to Prim screaming. Katniss hugs her, calms her, sings to her. The images are close up, zoomed into Katniss’s and Prim’s faces, as they face the knowledge that the Reaping happens that day.

If you can’t see this video, click here.

  • Silhouettes.
    Sometimes the sensory details focus on silhouettes and shadows, often with a blinding light behind the character. Think Psycho (1960) and the silhouette on shower curtain (often parodied). This works well when the character likes to hide in the shadows until it is time to reveal themselves. This works well then timed for effect with a dramatic piece of dialogue.
  • Actions.
    Often, beginning with the character in action makes for a grand entrance. Think of the Bridal March: the audience rises and turns to watch the bride make the long walk down the aisle. Everyone’s full focus is on The Walk. Or think of the Red Carpet arrival of celebrities at a premier or awards ceremony. It doesn’t have to be a Walk, though. For a basketball player, but him on the court and let him score with his signature hook shot. Or show a doctor doing chest compressions as a snow sled skims down a ski slope.
  • Heroic qualities.
    Donald Maass, in his Breakout Novel Workbook, asks, “When does the reader first notice the heroic qualities of your character?” As a writer it’s helpful to think about what makes a character heroic in your own eyes. Then ask how you can present that quality the first time the character appears in your story.
  • In context of a setting.
    Sometimes, the setting is crucial to the story. It may be a space station or a hospital surgery or a swimming hole, but something about the setting is crucial. Here, you could give a short panorama of the scene, and then slowly zoom in to the character and what s/he is doing within your setting. Another option is to scan across a scene (mini-zooms of several people), then abruptly come back for a double take of your character.
  • Group – Team is in Place.
    Perhaps, the group of characters is just as important as the main characters. In this case, the Team needs a grand entrance, just as much as the main character needs one. Here, you might zoom in on the main character standing alone, and then slowly pull back as one-by-one others join him/her. The focus begins with one character but ends with the group as a cohesive character of its own.
  • Alternatives to the Grand Entrance

    Anti-Grand Entrance. For my WIP, I was thinking about all of these options for a major character and eventually rejected all of them. Instead, I slipped my character in on the sly. Jake, the main character, is waiting in the Emergency Room waiting area for his turn to be seen by the doctor. He’s distracted by a huge salt water tank and talks to an older woman who is cleaning the tank. Later, when he goes back to see the doctor, he discovers that the woman cleaning the aquarium is the doctor. This works in my story because one of the themes is hiding in plain sight. Jake dismisses a woman as someone who just cleans aquariums–and reveals things that he wouldn’t normally tell the doctor. It’s a bit of misdirection because Jake makes wrong assumptions.

    Second Grand Entrance. Another idea to consider for grand entrances is that sometimes, a character needs a second grand entrance, after some life-altering change. In Dicken’s “Christmas Carol,” Scrooge awakens the next morning as a changed man. He walks to the window and throws it open. Ah, what nice imagery. He’s looking out on a new world! He calls to a boy to fetch the large goose and have it delivered to the Cratchit family. This second grand entrance stands in contrast to the first grand entrance of Scrooge and tells the reader that a huge character change has been accomplished.

    Whatever approach you choose, think hard about the reader’s first impressions of each major character. It is true that first impressions matter.

    The post Grand Entrance: Pay Attention to This Character appeared first on Fiction Notes.

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    15. Slight: What Does an Editor Mean?

    Thanks, L.A. for the question for today. She received a rejection that called her picture book manuscript, “slight.” What does an editor mean by that term? And what can you do about it? (BTW, I love questions! Send me your questions and I’ll try to do a post on it.)

    Prairie Storms: How prairie animals survive storms across a year.When by nonfiction book, Praire Storms was accepted by Arbordale, the editor said they had several prairie books to consider that year and choose mine because it had many layers. It’s the story of how prairie animals survive during a storm. But that’s not all it is.

    The layers include prairie animals, how they fit into that landscape, storms, and the months of the year/seasons. It wasn’t enough just to write a story with animals and their habitat. The addition of storms made sense, because on the prairies, the skies are such a big part of what you see. But I also knew that the Next-Gen Science Standards for K-3 emphasized the relationship between animals/habitats, and also how weather shapes the Earth. The book could be used to emphasize a variety of standards across K-3, or even into 4th or 5th for classrooms that used picture books.

    Even that wasn’t enough. I also decided to include 12 animals and to feature one per month. Elementary students are learning about the months of the year and the seasons, so that added yet another layer that made it appealing in the classroom. Finally, I think the writing was a factor. I wrote the story first in poetry, but then reworked it as prose, because Arbordale usually translates their books into Spanish and prose is easier to translate. However the poetic feel came through in the revision. The poetry draft gave me language and rhythm patterns that made the book a stronger read aloud.

    Adding Layers to Your Story

    Editor says, "Too Slight." Revise for Depth | Mims House.com
    Study curriculum standards. To add layers to your own story, consider the various curriculum standards to see if there’s something you can layer over the story. It’s not the most important factor in selling a book, especially a trade book; however, any consideration of market is always appreciated. Make sure the layer is integral to the story and not forced, or it won’t work. When you write your cover letter, be sure to mention that you’ve added these layers; or consider adding a note at the end with info on how the mss can be used for certain standards.

    Language. I used a poetry draft to enhance my writing of Prairie Storms. It’s just one way to get to the idea that you need a story that’s a great read aloud. The language of the story should pull the reader along and be pleasant to read over and over. Read more on creating a satisfying read-aloud picture book.

    What’s the Takeaway? Finally, consider the theme of the story. This is similar to the morals of the Aesop Fables. However, you shouldn’t bash the reader over the head with the story. Instead, the takeaway is the overall point of the story, whether stated or not. Often, it’s NOT stated explicitly, but is something the reader/listener will understand as a result of the story. It’s the answer to the question, “So what?”

    In Prairie Storms, this is the weakest element with only a hint of a takeaway in the last line: “The bison stand, prairie-strong and defiant.” I meant that in a more general way for all the animals featured, that they were strong, and the prairie was a stronghold for wildlife in America. Defiant, for me, meant that even in the face of environmental problem, they would survive. After all, the bison have escaped extinction. It’s a stretch, yes, and I could’ve done more to make the takeaway explicit. Sometimes, I err on the side of understatement!

    For your story, add layers: historical, literary, technical, or emotional layers. And you’ll never get that dreaded rejection note that says, “Too slight.”

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    16. Nominate Fiction Notes for Top Writing Blog

    Dear friends –

    This is a combination of two things: a list of popular posts in 2015 and a request for help. For the past two years you’ve been kind enough to nominate Fiction Notes as a Top 10 Blog for Writers. I’m asking if you’d be kind enough to do it for 2016.

    WritetoDone.com, who sponsors the contest has new rules for 2015 – please read carefully.

    To Nominate your favorite writing blog, you need to do 3 things in the comments section of this post:

    Nominate only one blog post from your favorite writing blog. If you nominate more than one blog post, even in different comments, only your first vote will be counted.
    Specify the correct web address of the blog post you’ve nominated.
    Give reasons why you believe the blog post you’ve nominated should win this year’s award.
    If your comment does not fulfill these criteria, your nomination will be invalid.

    Only posts from writing blogs will be considered.
    The blog post you nominate should have been first published in 2015.
    You nominate a specific blog post, and that blog becomes a candidate for the Top 10 Blogs for Writers 2015/2016.

    Nominations must be received by 24th December, 2015.

    Click here to Nominate Fiction Notes for a Top Blog for Writers

    So, it’s a bit different because you must nominate with a specific blog post, not just the overall blog itself! And the blog posts must have been written in 2015. I hope this list of top 10 blog posts from 2015 will help – the URL is provided for your convenience, too.

    Top 10 Fiction Notes Blog posts feature marketing, characters, and revision. | DarcyPattison.com
    TOP 10 Blog Posts for 2015 include topics of marketing, characters, and revision

    Top 10 Fiction Notes Posts for 2015

    1. Top 20 Picture Book Agents – 234 Sales in Last 12 Months – http://darcypattison.com/marketing/top-20-picture-book-agents-2015/
    2. Top 20 YA Agents – 72 Deals in Last 12 Months – http://www.darcypattison.com/marketing/top-10-ya-agents-72-deals/
    3. Top 20 Middle Grade Agents – 129 Sales in Last 12 Months – http://www.darcypattison.com/marketing/top-20-middle-grade-agents-2015/
    4. Find Your Novel’s Opening: Quickly, Efficiently – and with MORE Creativity – http://www.darcypattison.com/first-drafts/find-novel-opening/
    5. Don’t Write a Damsel-in-Distress OR a Modern Super-Woman: Be Original – http://www.darcypattison.com/characters/dont-write/
    6. 10% of My Traffic Comes From Pinterest: Expand Your Author Platform – http://www.darcypattison.com/marketing/pinterest-for-authors/
    7. Openings: 5 Ways Openings Go Wrong – http://www.darcypattison.com/revision/openings-5-ways-they-go-wrong/
    8. What’s in Your Writer’s Bag of Tricks? Putting the Writing Process in Context – http://www.darcypattison.com/revision/writing-process/
    9. Is My Story Good or Bad? Wrong Question -http://www.darcypattison.com/revision/is-my-story-good-or-bad-wrong-question/
    10. Author Website – Getting Started http://www.darcypattison.com/marketing/author-website-getting-started/

    Click here to Nominate Fiction Notes for a Top Blog for Writers

    Thanks! It’s been a pleasure to talk with you this year!

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    17. Sell Your Novel: 2 Important Tools

    You’ve finished your novel! Hurrah! Wahoo! Take time to celebrate!

    And then, you wonder, can you sell this manuscript to a publisher? Welcome to the world of marketing your novel. It’s a relatively straight-forward process and two simple tools make it easy.

    The Query Letter and the Synopsis

    Tips on writing a successful query and compelling synopsis | DarcyPattison.com

    You can’t live long as a writer without developing a dread of The Query Letter. But it shouldn’t be a fearful thing.

    First and foremost, a query is a business letter. You are asking a business (either agent or editor) a simple question. “Are you interested in reading my story?”

    Please – don’t make it more difficult than that.
    I know. Sometimes we’re tempted to endlessly critique a simple, one page query letter. Resist the urge. Write a business letter and let it do its job.

    Here’s a simple plan:
    Paragraph 1: Simple statement of what you’re selling. State what you have to sell. You should mention the title, length, genre and anything else pertinent. If you have a particular reason to sell to this particular agent/editor, state it here, too.

    Paragraph 2: Hook the reader. Why should a reader care about your story? You’re a writer. In fact, you’re a great fiction writer. Just write a simple one-paragraph hook for the novel. Answer the “So what?” question and make the reader want more. That’s the key: you want the agent/editor to want to read much, much more!

    Paragraph 3: Who are you? Here’s where you insert the simple 100-word bio that you’ve already got set up somewhere. Tweak it to make it fit this novel, of course.

    Streamline Marketing with a Grab File of Previously Written Bios and Summaries

    I like to take time to write up bios and summaries of stories in various lengths and then just customize the bio/summary for any given situation. Here’s a few of the bios I have available::

    • Tag line: Darcy Pattison, children’s book author and writing teacher, . . .
    • 25 word bio: Include the most prestigious awards/publications/etc. If you have none, do NOT apologize or say, “I’m not published yet, but. . .” Just don’t say anything.
    • 50 word bio: Here, I build on the previous and add any other books/awards that are appropriate.
    • 100 word bio: Building on the previous, I loosen up some and try to add some fun and more details.
    • Full Blown bio for when I’m speaking: Usually, I only need a full blown bio for when I’m speaking and they want to introduce me. Or teachers/librarians/reviewers/etc. sometimes want a full bibliography. For those times, I keep a pdf version available for download.


    I’ve just written a synopsis and it was frustrating. I took 60,000 words to tell a story and a synopsis attempts to tell the story in only 1500-2000 words. Obviously, you’re going to leave out tons of story! How do you manage it?

    The best advice I’ve heard is to tell the main through-story as if it were a short story. The through-line is the main plot or the story that carries throughout the story. It’s like a line is anchored in chapter one and then threads through every part of the story.

    My first thought was to summarize every chapter with a sentence or two, but that’s not quite right. Instead, think short story. It needs to read as an interesting story, but you have few of the tools usually used in short stories. There’s little room for dialogue or in-depth scenes. You may hint at a scene here or there, but you won’t really develop it. Instead, the synopsis is narrative writing. Still use your strong verbs and sensory details whenever possible, but focus on moving through the story and keeping the reader wondering what comes next.

    The query and synopsis aren’t hard. They are, however, a tighter form of writing than you’re used to while writing that long, long novel. Don’t agonize after them; just get them done and get the query out the door! Because we want to see your novel in print!

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    18. Rough Draft to Final Draft

    NaNoWriMo is almost over, which means many of you will now 50,000+ words on a new draft.
    Of course, you realize it’s a rough draft. So, what’s next?

    Since 1999, I’ve taught Novel Revision Retreats that answer this very question. How do you take the rough draft to a finished draft?

    Step 1. Look at what you’ve written. At this point, there are really two versions of your novel. There’s the novel in your head and the novel on the page. And they aren’t the same. Your intentions were only partly realized in this version. That means its time to actually look at what you wrote, and not what you think you wrote.

    I ask writers to go through the mss chapter by chapter (or scene by scene, if they’d rather) and write one sentence to summarize the actions (plot) and another sentence to summarize the emotional content of the scene/chapter. Also, note whether the scene contains conflict.

    If you read through these summaries, it should be a fairly smooth synopsis of the entire story. And you’ll see the holes in the story much easier.
    “>The function of the first draft. . . | quote from Darcy Pattison
    Step 2. Re-Envision. Once you SEE the story you’ve written, it’s time to re-envision that story. This is the death of one story–the one in your head–and the birth of a better story–the one on the page. How can you tell the story in a stronger, more emotional way? The function of the first draft is to tell you the story you have to tell; the function of the next draft(s) is to find the best way to tell that story. In other words, you’re focusing on the reader now.

    You experience this all the time. For example, when you tell people later about getting Christmas presents, you’ll likely order the telling in a way that emphasizes emotion. Let’s say, you wanted to get a new cocker spaniel. You tell about opening sweatshirts, tickets to see the latest movie, and then–that small package that held little hope of being what you really wanted until you opened it and it said to go look in the laundry room. And there, in a carrying case, was–yes! the sweetest puppy ever.

    You don’t tell about the puppy first. You hold back and build up the tension; your listeners are wondering what you really got for Christmas and if you were happy with it. Were you angry at your family or delirious with joy? Emotions. You withhold certain information until it makes the most emotional impact.

    That’s what you need to do with your story now: pay attention to your audience and build the story so that it’ll give the most emotional impact.

    Step 3. Rewrite. Then Repeat Steps 1 and 2 until you’re happy with the story.

    The workbook for my Novel Revision Retreat goes into the process in far more detail!

    Learn to Revise Your Novel with Darcy Pattison
    Learn to Revise Your Novel with Darcy Pattison

    For more detail on taking your story from rough to finished, Work through the simple exercises in the book. Order the paperback now.

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    19. What Makes a GREAT Bedtime Story?

    Swedish psychologist Carl-Johan Forssén Ehrlin surprised the book publishing world this summer as his book for children and their parents shot to number one on Amazon. The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep is a self-help book that gives parents a script to follow as they try to get a child to go to sleep. Because of its performance on Amazon, Penguin has picked up the book for a reported seven-figure deal.

    Of course, I had to read it. Buzz does sell books.

    Rabbit (if I can casually call it by the name of the insomniac main character) reminds me of the Academy Awards ceremony. Screenwriters, directors, actors and actresses, cinematographers and the full complement of support staff for a major move were awarded the highest honor that filmmaking can bestow, Academy Awards. And for every movie about a cause—from elderly rights to gay rights and beyond—the person being honored felt compelled to stand up and explain why their cause was so important and timely. . . thereby negating the art for which they’d just been honored.

    Why did they not trust their art to plead their cause in deeper and stronger ways than a week diatribe made during a gala ceremony? It baffles me.

    In the same way Ehrlin explains why a good bedtime story works. He has built into the script certain keywords – sleep now, yawn, now—which should help put the child in the right frame of mind. Further, he uses some words because they sound calm and slow, thus reinforcing the desired frame of mind. Repetition finds its place as a tool to calm and convince a child to fall asleep.

    But why does Ehrlin feel the need to explain it all so blatantly? Perhaps, it’s because parents don’t go behind the scenes for a children’s bedtime story; they don’t understand, and therefore don’t trust, that the writer really knows what s/he is doing when writing this kind of story.

    In fall 2016, I’ll join the ranks of authors with a bedtime story, ROWDY: The Pirate Who Could Not Sleep. Let me show you what’s behind the curtain of my writing process.
    Write a GREATBedtime Story: 4 Crucial Elements | darcypattison.com

    The Sounds of Words

    As a young writer, I once heard Newbery medalist Lois Lowry speak about a story that ended in a quiet moment that she hoped would calm a child and help them sleep. She avoided harsh-sounding words and used soft words. That’s right. The way the words sounded was just as important, if not more so, than the meaning of the words.

    Poets John Ciardi and Miller Williams said a similar thing in their classic book, How Does a Poem Mean. They emphasize the “connotations speaking to connotations,” an effect they say will create imagery and symbolism. In other words, it matters whether you use the word “fire” or “inferno” because of how it sounds, its connotations and its definitions. Just as important, though, is how it affects the rhythm pattern of your piece of writing. Fire has only one syllable, while Inferno has three syllables; using one over the other affects the rhythm patterns of the writing.

    I have a B.A. in Speech Pathology and an M.A. in Audiology; one of the most useful classes from my college years was phonics, or the study of how sounds are made in the human mouth and how to record those sounds with the International Phonetic Alphabet.

    For a bedtime story, you want to avoid harsh sounding consonants, what phonetics calls fricatives or affricatives: f, v, th, t, d, sh, zh, ch, j, s and z. Other sounds to avoid are the plosives: b, p, t, d, k, g. You can’t avoid these two major groups of consonants entirely! But you can minimize them, especially when you want the words to be the softest.

    Another distinction phonetics makes is among voiced or unvoiced consonants. Put your hand on your throat and say T –T –T ; repeat with D – D – D. Do you feel that your vocal cords vibrate for the D, but not for the T? T is unvoiced; D is voiced. Unvoiced consonants are softer, and more suited to bedtime stories.

    The softest sounds are the glides: w, l, r and y. These are the real winners for a calming bedtime story.

    For vowels, you should understand that some vowels involve lots of tension in the mouth, while some are created with a relaxed mouth. Say a long A; now say AW. Do you feel the difference in the mouth’s tension?

    Ehrlin merely takes a clue from phonetics/linguistics and uses relaxed vowels, along with soft consonants.

    Why is a rabbit the right animal for Ehrlin to choose for a bedtime story? Rabbit is a relatively calm word: Glide R; short A is relatively relaxed; B is a plosive, but it’s buried in the word’s middle; UH is a relaxed vowel; T is a plosive but because it’s unvoiced, or your vocal cord doesn’t vibrate for it, it’s relatively calm.

    My Fall 2016 bedtime story, ROWDY: THE PIRATE WHO COULD NOT SLEEP, is about Captain Whitney Black McKee. She’s a rowdy pirate captain who fights sea monsters and returns to home port, but finds that she can’t sleep. Her crew goes a’thievin’, in search of a lullaby to help her sleep. In the end, the cabin boy brings back her Pappy who sings her a lullaby.

    Here’s that last stanza, which you cannot read it harshly because the words, the phrasing and the story that I wrote demand that you say it softly.

    Then Pappy sang of slumber sweet,
    while stars leaned low and listened.
    And as the soft night gathered round.
    The pirates’ eyes all glistened.

    Rowdy: The Pirate Who Could Not Sleep | Preview of Fall, 2016 book by Darcy Pattison

    GREAT bedtime stories include. . .

    1. Child-in-lap relationship. Mem Fox, the beloved Australian writer, talks about the importance of keeping in mind the child-in-the-lap relationship. She means that when you read a story to a child, you are also developing a relationship with that child. She likes to end stories with something that will make the child turn to the adult and give them a hug or say, “I love you.”

      koalalouHer beloved book, Kaola Lou, has the refrain, “Kaola Lou, I do love you.” And of course, it’s hard to read without also saying to the child in your lap, “I love you.”

    2. Language development. The great bedtime stories take into account the whole child, not just his or her ability to go to sleep quickly. Instead, they develop a child’s language. Because these are books provided at developmentally appropriate times in a child’s life, it’s an opportunity to entice them with language: the sounds of their native language, the vocabulary, the rhythm patterns and so on. Kindergarten teachers spend time teaching nursery rhymes (Jack be nimble; Jack be quick; Jack jump over the candlestick.) because it develops skills in language.
      In a like manner, the classic Goodnight Moon! by Margaret Wise Brown uses rhythm, refrains and much more. Consider the humor of this line: “Goodnight, nobody.” It makes for a story that you don’t mind reading for the 1000th time.

    3. Story. As children develop language, an important skill is the ability to understand stories. This involves sequencing of events (beginning, middle, end), understanding cause-effect relationships, character motivations and much more.

      llamaLlama, Llama Red Pajama by Anna Dewdney has an appropriately simple story. Baby Llama is tucked into bed, but when Mama leaves the room, he calls that he needs a drink of water. The plot complication is just that Mama is delayed in bringing up the water, so Baby Llama panics. When Mama shows up, she reassures him that she is “always near, / even if she’s / not right here.” It’s a gentle, reassuring story. And while it tells the story, it also gives kids experience in understanding Story.

    4. Vocabulary building. Kids love big words—in the right context.
      Jane Yolen’s story, How Do Dinosaurs Say Good Night? provides great fun with the names of various dinosaur species. What kid can resist words such as Allosaurus, Pteradon, Apatosaurus, and Tyrannosaurus Rex? But Yolen also includes words appropriate for the bedtime hour. “Does a dinosaur slam his tail and pout?”
      You can’t read this without screwing up your face in a pout, thus teaching the meaning of a vocabulary word in a natural context.

    My own bedtime story is titled ROWDY: The Pirate Who Could Not Sleep (to be released Fall, 2016). Will kids know the meaning of “rowdy”? Doubtful. But within the story’s context, they’ll learn it. Bedtime stories, then, are a comfortable and natural context for teaching new words.

    Great children’s book authors create works that don’t need the artificial crutches of bold and italic fonts to tell the adult reader how to present the story. Instead, it’s right there in black and white on the page. It tells a great story that reinforces language and vocabulary development. And when it’s done right, a great bedtime story gives an adult an opportunity to give the kid a hug and a kiss and say, “I love you.”


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    20. The Heart of Revision: Finding Your Own Answers

    I’ve written before about revising based on critiques and editorial letters covering both the emotional upheaval and the how-tos.

    You’d think I’d know what I’m doing by now.
    But each revision brings challenges. I’ve been struggling through the line edits on my manuscript and I’ve found them to be of three general types:

    Clarity. My original wording is unclear. The line edit added clarity. These, I keep or modify even further to make sure I’m clear. Writing is the act of putting something on paper that reproduces a thought EXACTLY in the reader’s mind. That’s makes clarity the first goal of all writing. Otherwise, the communication fails.

    Technical issues. This might include subject-verb agreement, verb tense, etc. I’ll almost always do this.

    Matters of choice. Some edits however, just seem to be a matter of personal preference. Which way would you say this?

    • It was like a dolphin’s tail.
    • It was akin to a dolphin’s tail.

    Both versions are clear; there are no technical issues. On line edits like this, I do what I want. Or more specifically, I look at the surrounding text and ask myself, “Would I write that? Is that my voice?”

    I won’t accept any line edits that change my voice or try to force it into other paths. I’m not foolish: I consider the edit because maybe I was lazy when I wrote this paragraph and I wasn’t thinking of the best choices. Often, however, it’s how the editor would have phrased it and it’s not my voice. No go. I won’t change that.

    Line edits, then, take time. You must consider each one in turn and decide to keep it, modify it even more, or reject it.

    And that’s the problem right now. I’m bogged down in line edits. Talking with a friend, she said it a different way: you need to re-read the editorial letter at different points in the revision.

    Editorial letter. Oh, yeah. That. There is a long editorial letter that addresses overall issues of plot, characterization, pacing, and backstory. THAT is what I really wanted to focus on for this revision. Instead, I’m just tediously going through line edits.

    Revision is a combination of micro and macro. You must go deep into the words and sentences used to tell the story–the line editing. But at the same time, you must pull back and take a wider view. I’ve been lost in the details for the past week. My plan for this week is to reread the editorial letter and choose a couple major issues to focus my writing efforts.

    But even on the major issues raised in an editorial letter, I’m not likely to agree with the editor on everything. One thing a writer brings to a novel is a unique sense of what makes a story. There are no rights and wrongs in this business, only opinions. My sense of Story (with a capital S) is different from the editor’s sense of Story.

    Seldom do I do EXACTLY what a revision letter details. Instead, I read the editor’s thoughts with an eye toward understanding the heart of the issues raised. Then, make revisions based on that. It’s the difference between mechanically following a set of directions and understanding why those directions were given. Don’t blindly follow your editor’s advice: Go to the heart of the issues raised and find your own answers.

    Do you struggle with going from micro to macro levels of revision?


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    21. Go, Indie! Young Writer Go, Indie!

    On July 13, 1865, Horace Greeley penned an editorial that is famously quoted: “Go West, young man, go West and grow up with the country.”

    I had the privilege of meeting with a young writer this week who wanted to chat about her future. She’s articulate, smart and engaged. She’s already a member of a fan-fiction forum where she chats with other teens about writing. She’s planning to take the NaNoWriMo challenge and write 50,000 words in November. Even at fourteen, with parental controls carefully in place, she’s linked in and excited about the future of book publishing. Here are some of the things we discussed.

    Go Indie, Young Writer, Go Indie, and Grow Up with the Industry.

    Write 10,000 hours. If you want to be a writer, you must write.
    I asked Young Writer, “How many hours do you need to write to become a great storyteller?”
    She said, “My preacher said 10,000 hours to be good at anything.”

    Obviously, someone has read Malcom Gladwell’s book, Outliers, where he claims experts need that level of commitment. Whether you believe that number or not, it’s true that writers write. They don’t talk about writing, they don’t study text books about writing, they don’t wish they had written. They write.

    Likewise, most writers who are successful are readers. It’s certainly possible to avoid a deep literary background of reading–but I believe it’s much harder. Pour language in to get language out. The wider the variety of reading, the better.
    Go Indie Young Writer: Advice to Teenagers Just Starting Their Careers | Fiction Notes by Darcy Pattison
    Prepare to be a social media maven. A second skill for writers growing up today is social media. Aspiring young writers should become comfortable on different social media platforms and participate a variety of communities devoted to literature. One thing that definitely means is the young writer needs skills in photo editing. Taking your own photos is even better, but for sure, they should be able to edit photos. For example, Facebook needs horizontal photos, while Instagram prefers square, and Pinterest highlights vertical. Can you take one photo and format it to fit each platform. Even as platforms morph (Instagram now allows horizontal or vertical, while preferring square), the ability to reformat photos will remain a valuable skill. One step farther, video skills will become increasingly important online. These are things that even a fourteen-year old can do, before they are even allowed by cautious parents (Hurrah for cautious parents!) allow social media accounts. For example, Lynda.com offers reasonably priced video tutorials on a wide variety of skills, including photo editing.

    Prepare to be a small business person. Already, Young Writer was asking, “Should I go Indie?”
    When I said, “Yes,” she was excited. She was already tending to think indie was a strong option for her.

    And fourteen years old is the time to think Indie, because it requires an entrepreneurial mindset. Indie authors are small business persons. They need a variety of skills: accounting, marketing, graphic design for book covers and book layout, social promotion and more. This was perhaps the biggest surprise for the Young Writer’s Mom. She had thought only of writing and producing the books, not of marketing them.

    Now is the time to think about the classes to take in high school and college that can feed into a successful venture in indie publishing. Learn accounting and financial management. One of the biggest challenges for me has been the financial side of indie publishing; in fact, I’d never even taken a basic accounting class before I started my venture. I suggested that Young Writer invest time in accounting, accounting software, and thinking like a financial planner.

    Likewise, books are an exercise in graphic design. Whether you do ebooks or print books, the book cover is a crucial sales tool, and the interior must be laid out in a professional and pleasing way. I’m not saying that Young Writer must do all her own graphic design; rather, she must be comfortable acting as an art director for her books. That means some experience in a graphic design class will help her see possible difficulties and solutions and hopefully, give her an eye for great design. Maybe an arts appreciation class is just as important as the graphics design class.

    What should I major in in college? asked Young Writer.

    The answer depends on Young Writer’s goals. Indie authors create multiple income streams to survive, especially in the early years. Typically, a writer earns income from book sales, speaking engagements, and teaching. Throw in some extra sales from repackaging the book for different formats: paperback, hardcover, ebooks, audiobooks, online video courses, and so on.

    If Young Writer wants to be a creative writing professor at a university level, then an MFA in Creative Writing makes sense. Or even a Ph.D. University programs are generally great at turning out professors, and not necessarily (with exceptions, of course) turning out practicing and successful writers.

    However, if Young Writer wants to really go entrepreneurial and try to make a living from her writing, I’d advise a minor in Creative Writing (while working on her 10,000 hours experience), and a degree in something else. Michael Crichton, author of Jurassic Park and other classics, graduated from medical school, although he never practiced as a doctor. The expertise in medicine–and his comfort in dealing with technical issues from chemistry to anatomy–brought something unique to his fiction. He was comfortable discussing the genetics of bringing back extinct species of dinosaurs – and making the science fiction plausible. Likewise, Young Writer might benefit from a degree in history, archeology, sociology, anthropology, medicine and so on.

    It depends on Young Writer’s goals, their personality, and their commitment to writing. But now is the time to think about options. And I think the future for smart young writers is in their own hands. Go Indie, young writer, go Indie, and grow up with the industry.

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    22. Does Your Scene Pivot: Creating Turning Points

    I’m revising my WIP novel one scene at a time and finding places where I need to do lots of work. Specifically, I want scenes that pivot.

    A scene is self-contained section of the story. Characters come into a scene with a goal and they either reach their goal or not. The scene should have a beginning, middle and end. And, according to THE SCENE BOOK by Sandra Scofield, your scene also needs a pivot point.


    Scofield says that characters go into a scene with a goal, with something they are fighting for. But at some point the story twists, deepens, or changes in a fundamental way.

    If you don’t have one, the scene is boring. Think about where the scene’s essence lies: the point at which everything changes. There if Before X and After X. X is the focal point. – Sandra Scofield, p. 54, The Scene Book


    It’s a hard concept in some ways to talk about, but you know it when you see it. In this short scene from the movie,”Good Will Hunting,” the focal point, pivot point, hot spot, turning point, or apex is when Will steps in to help his friend. This is a great example because it shows the character in action, doing something that matters.

    If you can’t see this video, click here.

    By contrast, some scenes in my WIP just sit on the page. For example, I have one scene where the main character meets the romantic interest character. There’s a lot of characterization going on; they are at a coffee shop where she’s a barista and he’s ordering a special coffee drink; there’s some humor. But the scene still felt flat. Until I realized that there’s no real pivot point, no fulcrum for the scene. To change it, he asks a simple question, “Who are you?” That launches her into a humorous, but character-revealing pseudo-tirade, which results in him really paying attention to her and finding that he’s VERY attracted. Before the tirade, he’s not interested; after the tirade; he’s hooked.

    To revise your scenes, fill in the blanks:

    Before _____________(Pivot Point), my character _______________; AFTER _______________(Pivot Point), my character ____________________.

    Find a way to pivot somewhere in each scene–and you’ll hook me as a reader!

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    23. Revision Mindsets: Artist, Story or Audience

    I talk a lot about revising fiction here and when I visit with people. I teach novel revision, especially in my novel revision retreat. Recently, I’ve been trying to reconcile the different ways talk about revision and understand the differences. It seems to me that there are several distinct differences, each with its own strengths.

    Three distinct mindsets about revising. Which one do you use?
    Three distinct mindsets about revising. Which one do you use?

    Don’t Revise. One school of thought is that the raw energy of a first draft represents your storytelling at its best. For these writers, they will work on learning craft issues, but once a tory is written, they don’t want to revise extensively, or they feel it will kill the energy. Don’t’ mistake this for laziness; they are diligently learning plotting, characterization, and so forth. Rather, like other artists, they believe the raw energy – a sort of primitiveness in visual art might be an analogy – is more important.

    Re-envision. This type of revision takes a first draft and re-envisions it drastically to meet a mental model of a perfect story. The ideal story varies from writer to writer and genre to genre. Some will tout the hero’s journey as the perfect story, and scenes must slot into the stages of the journey. Whatever the story model, the goal is to match up the current story with the model. Often, it requires extensive rewriting because the writer’s first draft didn’t follow the model.

    While this holds out the promise of a great story, it can also be a trap for the under-confident writer. If an editor has a different mental model of story, it could mean extensive rewrites of a story that under a different editor would be acceptable.

    Reader Oriented. For me, the first draft of a story is to find out what story you want to tell. All subsequent drafts have the goal of finding the most dramatic way to tell the story. That means, you’re thinking of the reader. How can you tell a story to impact the reader the way you want? Do you want them to be scared, touched emotionally by tenderness, or so tense that the pages turn themselves? Revision here blends the mental model of a story with the reader’s imagined responses.

    Of course, literary theorists can talk about reader-response theory, the narrative arc, and lots of other literary analysis techniques. I’m not saying you need to be proficient in all of those. Rather, I’m asking – what’s the most important consideration for you as you revise?

    Your unique vision – you, as a creative artist.
    Shaping a story to match your mental model of Story (with a capital S). Story theory.
    Reader’s reaction. Audience.

    No rights and wrongs. Only a recognition of your goals as a writer.

    What’s your mindset as you approach the revision of a story? And does it change from story to story?

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    24. EBooks for Kids? New Study Says Maybe Not

    To study ebook adoption by kids and school libraries, School Library Journal and Follett School Solutions recently released the Sixth Annual Survey of Ebook Usage in the U.S. School (K-12) Libraries (September 2015).

    Optimism about ebook adoption in schools has run high for the last few years, but this study provides some interesting news. Depending on where you fall on the issue – pro-eBook or pro-printBook – the details are shifting.

    2015 Studies: Do Kids Like eBooks?Reading on eBooks May Hamper Learning. In the past year, several research studies report that reading on ebooks may hamper understanding and/or retention of information, especially putting events into a time order. However, the studies come with a big question mark: “what about ‘ebook’ or mobile-device natives?” Kids growing up today who have known only computers and smart phones may develop differently – the research is still out.

    USABILITY PROBLEMS: Too Many Standards, Too Many Passwords. Students and school libraries have too many conflicting choices for reading an ebook. On Kindle alone, there are eight different devices and apps for another 27 devices. If a school library tries to commit to one device, say Kindle or Nook, the rapidly changing landscape means their ebook collection could rapidly become out-dated and unusable. Education distributors work around this by providing browser-based ebook readers (again, they are proprietary) that can be accessed by any device with a browser. Even getting around the problem of devices, students then have to contend with accounts and passwords. Digital security demands that schools maintain strict control of access to the ebooks. In my opinion, this is the biggest factor limiting the wide-spread adoption of ebooks in schools. The answer, of course, is for companies to stop haggling over their proprietary devices and strictly adhere to the international ePub3.0 standards. That’s unlikely.

    In the short term, the companies may feel it’s imperative to slug it out over the best platform for delivering and reading ebooks. In the long run, I think they are hurting themselves by alienating students and school staff. If it continues for long, educators may decide it’s not worth it and turn back to only print resources.

    eBooks are Available in Schools. Across the US, about 56% of schools report that ebooks are available. But students don’t often choose them (see standards/passwords above for at least a partial explanation). Nonfiction related to school projects edges out fiction titles in popularity. Only 6% of schools report a high interest in ebooks, 37% report moderate interest, and 57% report low or no interest. Availability doesn’t equal use. Kids aren’t feeling the love for ebooks!

    Parents Demand Technology. Interestingly, it’s often parents who demand technology in the classroom. Over 20% of schools have a one-to-one device policy, which means that each child has a device for at least part of a day; another 24% plan to add one-to-one soon. But the problems are massive, from funding to implementation (see the standards/passwords above). While this study doesn’t cover parental or students attitudes toward ebooks, the Scholastic 2015 Kids and Parents Reading Report says that 65% of kids say they’ll always want to read print, up from 60% in 2012. Teenagers tend to read more when introduced to ebooks; on it’s top 12 list of things parents can do to encourage more reading, providing more ebooks holds the number 12 position. Read the Scholastic report for more details on the parent’s views on ebook reading.

    Are your books available as ebooks? Do you read more print or ebooks? Do your kids/grandkids read more print or ebooks?

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    25. Turning Out Words: Productivity

    My life is full. And I don’t want it any other way. I’m blessed to have such a rich, varied and full life.
    But, oh! Life is full! And I need to get writing done.

    2-10K: Increase your Productivity Easily!I recently read a great book on productivity. Now, don’t let it scare you away, because it’s called, 2K to 10K: Writing Faster, Writing Better, and Writing More of What You Love by Rachel Aaron. It’s a $0.99 Kindle book, and it’s worth way more.

    Here’s why. Rachel Aaron chronicles her story of going from very low productivity to extremely high productivity. She has a three-pronged approach.

    Knowledge. Before Aaron sits down to write, she knows what she’ll write. In other words, she does extensive pre-writing before she starts to write. This involves developing the world, the characters, and outlining the plot. Beyond that, on the day she writes a scene, she’ll spend 5-10 minutes sketching out the scene. To put it in my terms, she decides on the major beats of the scene. What are the major bits of action, dialogue, and thoughts that must happen in this scene and in what order should they come?

    I always emphasize the importance of prewriting. When I teach writing to kids, I spend the biggest chunk of time on the prewriting phase, making sure they know WHAT to write about. If you want to improve your writing, learn the discipline of prewriting. Aaron says that this alone will double your word count on any given day.

    Time. Next Aaron started to pay attention to her best working times. She realized that she needed four hours of uninterrupted time and it was best to write in the afternoons. In order to figure this out, she kept statistics. I know – words and numbers. But numbers are often important in our work. Over a period of time, Aaron recorded the start/stop times for writing and the number of words per session. After accumulating data, she analyzed it to find her most productive times. Once you know that, it’s simple. Protect that writing time and make sure your friends/family help you protect it.

    Enthusiasm. Finally, Aaron realized that some days she was more enthusiastic about her work than others. In studying the problem, she realized that she wasn’t excited about some scenes. Well – if the AUTHOR isn’t excited by a scene, why should a reader be excited, she reasoned. Turning back to the prewriting phase, Aaron decided that she wouldn’t write a scene ever again unless she was excited by something in the scene. Some turn of phrase, turn of events, twist of emotions or something. If she couldn’t find that enthusiasm, she’d cut the scene and work to find another version of the events that did excite her.
    Productivity: How to write your novel faster.
    By the end, Aaron was writing 10,000 words/day – regularly. Prewrite. Write at your most productive times (and you only know that with data). And get and stay excited about your story. It’s easy!

    I started my new novel today and wrote 1750 words! Far from Aaron’s 10,000 words/day, but I’m just getting started! She says that she also speeds up as the novel enters the last phase. it was a blast to write today because I was so excited to get started – with a new set of strategies that might actually push me to write faster – and better!

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