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A couple of weeks before the 4th,
my mom gave me a call.
MOM: Our city is having a 5k on the 4th and I'm doing it but I'm sort of worried I might come in last and I really don't want that to happen. Will you do it with me?
ME: Sure. You bet.
MOM: Really?!?
ME: Sure.
ME: What's a Fivekay?
MOM: (explains what a 5k is)
ME: WHAT?
MOM:
Not to mention, my schedule's been like this:
I haven't been outside in months!
But mother birthed me and all, so I woke up at 4 am and dressed all cute
and did my hair all cute and drove to my old home town, West Point.
The starting line was packed.
Luckily I found my mom.
The horn sounded, and we were off in a cloud of dust!
Pretty soon everyone had run ahead.
Pretty soon my own mother had run ahead.
Pretty soon I reached the half mile mark and
I realized I wasn't going to make it.
Fortuitously enough, the race route was just passing a road...
...that just happened to lead to my parents' house...
SNEAKY
Luckily I had a key :)
I used the bathroom...
...checked my phone messages...
...ate some watermelon in the big bowl on the counter...
It wasn't too long before I saw the runners making their
way back to the park.
I figured it was time to skedaddle.
Admittedly, I didn't exactly burn the rubber
off the soles of my shoes.
When I finally turned the corner to the finish line,
I was met with this:
Well that didn't make me feel guilty at all.
I ended the race at a run, leaving behind
a great big steaming wake of CHEAT.
30 minutes later, my mom found me.
Apparently she'd discovered me missing in the middle of the race.
What do you know. She won 2nd place.
(She owes it all to me)
Afterwards there was a raffle where I won a Striders
t-shirt, ballcap, and decal.
So now everyone can know just how much I love to run!
THE END.
PS If you haven't seen a West Point parade, here is a taste of the joy
(watch it 45x for the full parade experience):
It has the two best t's in the world: Tractors and Taffy. Yesss baby!
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Congrats for doing an event I will never do!! (Not really that athletic, haha) Illustrations were perfect! (as usual!)
I am DYING laughing!!!! I will have to look back at this post a few times at work, where I always need a good laugh.
They should change the official course to include a stop at your parents' house (for a bathroom break and watermelon eating contest). Now THAT would be a fun run!
Love it.
You looked great running, btw.
I wonder what Mom has to say about this post...
Hahahaaaaa...I love all these illustrations.
I was having such a rough night...
It was a real treat to find your blog post!! GREAT STUFF!!
On a side note, I ate a turkey sandwich today and thought of you! :)
Once again I am getting weird looks at the library for laughing out loud! This was great! I'm still shaking with laughter although quieter now.
You are a genius!
Heather, seriously, your blog makes me so ridiculously happy. I can't stop laughing and I want to frame the drawing of you and the watermelon.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Thank you
Love it, as usual! (Don't know if you're a Back to the Future fan, but I totally thought of this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6SEXp3-lo8 )
Love love LOVE this blog! Thanks for sharing! It made me laugh so hard!
And wouldn't you know it, just this morning I was thinking you hadn't posted in a while, and how your presence on Facebook is noted and missed. YAY for a new post!
LLOL! I love these stories so much. Mom vacuuming the mansion and you working through the night are genius.
As an avid runner, this post amuses me, especially since I certainly did NOT used to be a runner, avid or otherwise. But seriously Heather, if this ever happens again... don't wear your flip-flops. The right footwear makes all the difference in the world. :)
Hilarious, so funny I posted it on Facebook!
Also, my family and I attempted to watch "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" the other night, and didn't make it any further than "Toot Sweets." Guess it's not the right movie for the Petersons.
You are hilarious, Heather.
Haha! Your storyboards always make me laugh. I look forward to every one.
That's such an awesome story. I had a friend who was in the army in WWII and he told me a story similar with him hiding in a bush throughout the rest of the laps. Its great to know people have fun and congrats to your mom for second! That's awesome!
hilarious. great story and fantastic drawings Heather.
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
HAHAHAHAH! Bahaha! Haha! ha!
This is hilarious!! Thanks for telling this story!
I loved this..I think it is my second favorite with the 'Turkey Sandwich'..so funny..and totally what I would have done!