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My daughter got a camera for Christmas. My college student sons got new phones. My husband got an electric hammer. I got Irritable Cat Syndrome.
ICS can afflict anyone at anytime, as long as they have a cat. You are more prone to getting ICS if you have recently adopted a cat from an animal shelter.
Cats confined to small cages for long periods of time after having been abandonned by previously loving families are five thousand times more likely to inflict ICS upon their new owners. ICS is not readily apparent while the cat is still in the animal prison, laying in his cat litter because his cage is too small.
At this phase, pre-ICS, the cat is extremely loving and snuggly and on its best behavior in his attempts to force you to fall in love with him and go into utter panic, when the last chance adoption sign is put on his cage. In pre-ICS, the cat will gently touch you with his paw as you walk by his cell block. If you remove him from the cell block to pet his soft orange fur, he will purr and rub his cheek against your cheek. He will not try to get away because he wants to get away with you at this point, rather than away from you.
After you pay the adoption fees, he will remain grateful for a period of time. He will bounce five feet in the air from a sitting position and catch all flying pests. He will kill these pests and lay them at your feet. Then he will rub against your legs and purr.
When you leave the house, he will run to the window and watch you leave, wondering if you are coming back. When you come back he will run to you and meow loudly that he is glad you came back. That being left alone before was traumatizing and he doesn’t want it to happen again. He will not jump on your counters or furniture because only bad cats do that and he is not bad, so please don’t take him back to animal prison.
Then ICS begins to set in. He realizes, the cute little kitty, after gaining five pounds from being fed properly, that you are more in love with him now than he is with you. He can begin to test your love. He hops on your dressers and steals jewelry and hides it under your bed. He hops on the counter and knocks food stuffs off and the dogs eat the stuff and when they get into trouble, he waits for them to be taken to the animal shelter.
When they are not, he must concoct other ways to irritate you. ICS is full blown now.
And, joy of joys, you set up the Christmas tree. He can climb inside the Christmas tree and try to knock it over. He can whack the ornaments off the tree and watch the dogs get into trouble again. He can pull all the bows and tags off the gifts under the tree and cause mad confusion on Christmas morning. He can rub against the gifts and leave clumps of orange fur and make everyone sneeze.
During ICS, you will wonder why the hell you brought him home from the animal shelter. When you lock him in your bedroom with you at night because the Christmas tree cannot be destroyed, even bringing all of his necessities into the room with you, he will torment you at regular two-hour intervals, pawing at your face, nipping at your nose, scratching at the door, leaping at the door knob to open the door. See, he had figured out how to open long handled doors. But, the bedroom door knob is round. He can’t open that. So, he stalks you.
And this is Irritable Cat Syndrome. It is worse than Irritable New Baby Syndrome. It makes you take down the Christmas tree two days after Christmas and say to him, “Hah! You can’t ever make me take you back to the animal shelter, you Devil Cat. You’re stuck with me til the day I die!”
And at this, he rubs against you and purrs.
1 Comments on Irritable Cat Syndrome, last added: 12/31/2009
So after typing that title I just realized that could be taken the wrong way. So let me explain myself.
I was doing some thinking today and was wondering what the "official" end of Christmas is. In my house, we never rush around taking the Christmas stuff down on December 26th, although I know some people do. In fact, I'm still reading a few Christmas books I didn't have time to get to before the holidays right now. I'm still listening to Christmas music. Our tree is still up and we still turn on the lights. We sang Christmas hymns in church today.
For me, I guess we really end Christmas on New Year's Eve. My family's not really into the whole partying on New Years thing, but we usually take down the tree on December 31st or January 1st. And that's about the time I put away most of my other Christmas things for the year. I guess that I spend so many days thinking about Christmas that the excitement just seems too big to be contained in the single December 25th day.
So how about you? When does your Christmas end?
This is the
collage portrait I created for my parents for Christmas. I didn't have time to scan it, so I snapped a quick picture at night. I hope to get a chance to scan it soon. It has all their grandchildren on it. I also added a key with the word "heart" on it. My dad and brother are locksmiths, so it's fitting.
We just got back from visiting my husband's family in Buellton. Here's a pic of the ocean at Pismo Beach. Beautiful!!! The weather was gorgeous down there. We had a great time, but it's good to be home. Back to work on the house tomorrow. Can't wait!
...and to all, a good night....
Hope you had a very merry....
Evans, Richard Paul. 2009. The Christmas List. Simon & Schuster. 368 pages.
James Kier looked back and forth between the newspaper headline and the photograph of himself, not sure if he should laugh or call his attorney. It was the same photograph the Tribune had used a couple of years earlier when they featured him on the front page of the business section....While the photograph was the same, the headline could not have been more different. Not many people get to read their own obituary.
James Kier comes close to beating old Ebenezer Scrooge when it comes to crankiness. Well, not crankiness exactly. But for his cynical, cold-hearted, what's-in-it-for-me approach to life. His business practices don't just border on unethical and immoral, they're just downright mean and heartless. He doesn't care who he hurts in his life--it could be his childhood best friend, his elderly neighbor, or his own wife and son. The truth is if ever a man was in need of a wake-up call, it was James Kier. And you can count on Richard Paul Evans to deliver that and more in The Christmas List.
How do you want to be remembered? What do you want your legacy to be? Kier always thought he didn't care. That it just didn't matter how people felt about him. People's feelings just didn't rank very high with him. He didn't care how many enemies he made. Not if it made him richer, more successful. But when Kier reads his own obituary--well, more precisely reads the comments his online obituary brings, he realizes just how much he does care. It stings, really stings, to see how very many people are rejoicing in his death, how many are happy to talk bad about him. What he realizes--in those moments--is that truth is being spoken. The person they're describing, that is him. That is how he lived, that is how he treated people.
So what can he do about it? Can he change who he is? Can he change his legacy before it's too late? With an oh-so-helpful secretary, Kier has a plan for "fixing" his image, his legacy. But can it be done all by Christmas day?
I really enjoyed this one. It had an interesting premise. I didn't know at first how well it would work for me. But I must admit that even though this one is definitely message-driven and a bit melodramatic, well, it worked all the same. Expect it to be oh-so-bittersweet.
© Becky Laney of Becky's Book Reviews
For men, Christmas tree shopping has got to be at the top of the list of life’s all-time stress producers—right up there with purchasing a new mattress, remodeling the kitchen or babysitting six-month old triplets… alone… on Black Friday.
Tree acquisition is usually irreversibly triggered by “someone” remembering the holidays. That is, once your wife decides it’s time to get the tree, any chance for escape is lost. So, it’s best to get on board early by showing your beloved that you already have a trip to the tree lot in your Planner, immediately after Thanksgiving.
Yes, you could volunteer to get a tree earlier, although that would likely be viewed as sucking up. Pushing the date out a bit might work—let’s say until the Thanksgiving left-overs are gone. But I would eat fast.
Let’s assume for a moment that you make the right timing decision. On the day of the big purchase you will be richly rewarded if you take someone with you to share the experience. Trust me, tree selection is a decision you do not want to make alone. If no other option is available, call in a marker and take another male with you to help deflect the blame when you totally screw things up. Your buying guide should be someone highly regarded by your wife—-you know, like Josh Groban, Bon Jovi or the Iron Chef.
In the event you don’t know someone rich and famous who can cook or sing, take children—preferably related to you. And remember to lavish praise on them when they make their selection. You’ll want them beaming when your wife first sees them marching through the front door, proudly toting their Charlie Brown tree.
It goes without saying, the gold standard is convincing your wife to come with you. Surely, if you put your heart into the invitation, she will willingly leave the warmth of hearth and home for a trip to the cold, poorly lit and newly sprouted urban forest—AKA Jack’s Tree Lot.
Once there, she will no doubt relish hearing your carefully studied views of height versus girth, spruce versus pine, relative trunk curvature, growth patterns, limb distribution and, of course, moisture content. By next summer you’ll both remember this as a bonding experience.
With any luck, you’ll be in and out of the lot in less than ten minutes after picking the first tree you come to. Hey! It could happen. However, as a precaution, it might be prudent to bring along a thermos and some snacks. Better yet, if you have room in your trunk, consider tossing in a stocked cooler and a portable grill—you could be there for a while.
Merry Christmas, everyone. Drop by my web site any time for updates on my children's books or just to browse around ( http://www.billkirkwrites.com ).
Wishing Everyone a wonderful Christmas.
Wishing my LJ family a happy, safe, and merry Christmas!
Just to wish everyone out there in Virtual Land (or is it me that's virtual and you guys that are real..?) a very Merry Christmas.
I've not sent out cards this year, partly for eco reasons, but also because I didn't quite get it together. So, this is for everyone from me (it's another oil pastel illustration, similar to the Stars on Canvas one, but on yellow not black):
I hope those of you who celebrate Christmas have a lovely holiday. I'm hosting two separate Christmas Days this year: Dec 25th for friends and 27th for family. Mmmmm, that's LOTS of cooking, and I've not done anything in advance!! I'm sure it'll be alright on the night (I'm thinking calm thoughts)...
For what it's worth, my bit of wisdom for the holiday is: be as nice to one another as you can manage, and if for any reason you can't be with the ones you love, why not pass a little of that spare good will on to someone else out there who looks like they could use it?
The Twelve Days of Christmas
by Gennady Spirin. Marshall Cavendish Children's Books. 2009. Review copy supplied by publisher.
The Plot: You know the song: A partridge in a pear tree.
The Good: The illustration of each verse adds to what is there. So first, a partridge in a pear tree. Next, partridge and pear tree still there and now there is also two turtle doves. More and more is added, until the entire song is represented. It can be almost a game, as the book advances, to try to find all the parts of the song -- especially towards the end, where the tree and birds have shifted to the background horizon.
Spirin's illustrations (water color and colored pencil) have the look of Medieval Art. You could imagine them hanging in a church or museum.
A note at the end of the book gives the history of the book, along with the lyrics and music.
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© Elizabeth Burns of A Chair, A Fireplace & A Tea Cozy
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By: Cynthia Reeg,
on 12/24/2009
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Christmas greetings to everyone!
May the Christ child's gift of peace and love light the way in your New Year.
MERRY CHRISTMAS
Evans, Richard Paul. 2007. The Gift. 335 pages.
It's Christmas night.
A young boy with a gift of healing changes the lives of those around him. But his compassionate and miraculous gift has a price. He's dying; he can't heal himself. And each gift of healing takes more out of him. He loses strength with each one. The Gift is a story of love--compassionate and sacrificial love--a story of how one life can touch many. The book is the story of those whose lives he touched, he changed. It's narrated by Nathan Hurst a man with physical and emotional problems. He's a man in need of so much. Before he met Collin--the young boy--he was cynical, broken. His childhood was VERY VERY traumatic. His relationship with his mother--his only remaining family--so not good. Can Collin (and his family Addison (Collin's mom), Elizabeth (Collin's sister) help Nathan see the real meaning of Christmas?
It's Richard Paul Evans so expect it to be oh-so-bittersweet and a bit message-oriented. It's a nice book, an enjoyable one. I do enjoy these meaning-of-life type books on occasion.
© Becky Laney of Becky's Book Reviews
Dear Santa
It’s Christmas Eve and this children’s author is reflecting on the year that was, and, of course, thinking about what she’d like to find in her writerly stocking tomorrow morning.
I have had the best year of my writing life and for that I am really grateful. The release of Pearl Verses the World in May was the beginning of a wonderful merry go round of nice reviews, excellent
By: Julia,
on 12/23/2009
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Wishing all of you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
These are Christmas cards I illustrated for Christian Collection this year.
May God bless you as you seek the true reason for celebrating Christmas - that little baby born in a manger over 2000 years ago!
Merry Christmas,
Kristi Valiant
www.kristivaliant.com
As I've mentioned before, our household is a big fan of Karma Wilson and her 'Bear...' books. And, this is the very book that started the 'Bear...' craze in our household.
In "Bear Stays Up for Christmas", Bear's friends make a valiant effort to keep him awake for Christmas. Their efforts are successful ... but all that hard work keeping Bear awake makes Mouse, Hare, Badger, and the rest of the friends VERY tired. That's OK ... Bear's got them covered, and he works through the night to ensure a special Christmas for all of them.
The rhyming text is perfection, and the illustrations are so warm and cozy, it makes you want to snuggle up with Bear and his friends in his lair.
It's targeted to 4-8 year olds, but the pictures, lively characters, and catchy rhymes make it perfect for younger children as well.
If you're looking for a warm and fun holiday picture book classic for your family, "Bear Stays Up for Christmas" is guaranteed to please ... even when it's not the holidays (this is one we do NOT pack away after Christmas is over!).
It's nice to have a website that changes with the seasons. That is, until you get busy and neglect your website. Then you end up with pumpkins and Halloween witches on your website the week before Christmas (oops!). So I took a few minutes today to at least get rid of the pumpkins and replace them with snowflakes. Phew, just in time. Merry Christmas everyone!
To all the Sugar Frosted Goodness viewers!
So, it should come as no surprise that I think Mary Roberts Rinehart is awesome. And part of the reason for that is that she’s always at least a little bit surprising. I had no idea what to expect from The Truce of God, her Christmas story, and I’m not altogether sure what I think of it now, but I’m definitely impressed.
First of all, the Truce of God is a pretty cool thing to write about. During the eleventh century, the European nobility were referred to as “those who fight” (as opposed to “those who work” and “those who pray”), because basically they spent most of their time fighting private wars against their neighbors (or their overlords’ neighbors). The church dealt with this in a few different ways. One was the Crusades. Another was the Truce of God. Basically, the Church said, “Hey, no one is allowed to fight on weekends anymore. Or Thursdays. Or Lent, etc.” The Catholic Encyclopedia has a little more detail, if you’re interested (in general, it’s a good basic resource for medieval religious history).
Rinehart’s story is set in an 11th century town ruled by a guy named Charles. Charles is, of course, fighting a private war with a neighbor — one who also happens to be his cousin. Philip comes after Charles in the succession, which is the primary reason Charles hates Philip so much.
Actually, Charles is kind of obsessed. He’s gone so far as to kick his wife out of the castle because she hasn’t provided him with a son. She’s taken refuge with Philip, which makes Charles furious, and left their daughter behind, which sort of seems to make the whole thing worse. The daughter, Clotilde, misses her mother but also sort of hero-worships her father.
Anyway, it’s Christmas, and Charles isn’t allowed to attack Philip’s castle or he’ll be excommunicated, so he spends his excess energy lusting after Joan, a beautiful girl from the town, who is already involved with Guillem, one of Charles’ guards. Both with their relationship and Charles’ estrangement from his wife, there’s something very modern about the romance in The Truce of God. These are definitely 1920s people in medieval clothing, but in a good way. I mean, modern sensibilities make for a better middle ages than lots of stilted and self-consciously medieval language, right? Whatever the reason, it sort of works.
Anyway, all the characters get their problems sorted out, pretty much, although it’s unclear at the end whether Philip is or isn’t kind of an asshole. I sort of wish Rinehart had done a little more with the Truce of God, though. I mean, she does use to to good effect — it sort of serves to make Christmas more Christmassy — but she doesn’t effectively contrast the truce with the regular state of affairs, so it doesn’t seem as significant as it might otherwise.
Also, there are illustrations, which are nice, if self-consciously medieval — you know what I mean: everyone looks like they’ve escaped from a copy of Howard Pyle’s Robin Hood.
0 Comments on Christmas Stories: The Truce of God as of 1/1/1900
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All the best for a wonderful New Year to you and yours, Jennifer! May the fun and joy of Christmas last the whole year through!